share with you today, when it comes
to attracting the woman you want.
1. THE 'MAGIC COMBO' OF STATES OF MIND
The first is regarding the state of mind
you need to be in for maximum success.
When you are in the RIGHT state, which
is a combination of sexuality, dominance,
playfulness, confidence and security,
and relaxed with pep, what happens is that
a woman feels that YOU are this superior guy,
and it's then A SELF-ESTEEM boost to her
when she THEN sees that YOU have chosen HER
to spend your time with.
SHE feels BETTER about herself because
she FEEEELS that YOU have superior value,
and that YOU have chosen HER, so therefore
SHE must be worth more than she thought
before. She feels BETTER. So the idea is
to be SUPER SECURE and feeling great
YOURSELF, or she cannot possibly feel
better about herself when she finds that
you have chosen to be with her.
This is all subconscious, she does not
go around articulating this to herself
consciously at ALL.
Also, states are catchy, so being in
these states helps HER also enter
these fun, flirty, states of mind.
2. CLEARING UP WHAT IS MEANT BY
'LEARNED FROM THE FIELD'.
The 'field' is the real world where approaching
women happens. It's not a theory, it's reality.
It's where things are proven.
The PROBLEM though is that a lot of the
things written about the "field" are only
coming from certain PARTS of the field, and
certain types of women in those venues.
i.e. promiscuous women who are drunk in a bar
This can cause mass confusion for guys who may
be operating or trying to meet women in completely
different environments, or with guys who are
interested in a very different kind of woman.
On that note, let me share with you some
CRITICAL things that have been learned
IN THE FIELD, things that I have seen
OVER AND OVER again from being out there
not only for myself, but also from doing
hundreds of bootcamps personally:
Number one:
ALWAYS USE MINIMUM GAMEThis was a huge thing for me, because I actually
HAD this going for me when I first started out,
but then got caught up in all the guys swearing
about all their "cool routines" and "tactics".
It took a few weeks for me to get back to my
OWN conclusions and get results again.
I used to open up girls with something interesting,
perhaps a tease, perhaps something intriguing,
but INTERESTING always, then would as soon
as possible go to NORMAL mode of just kicking
back and chilling out and developing a connection
and rapport.
Then I started doing all kinds of crazy other stuff
that was "cool and in vogue among pick up artists",
and it got greater IMMEDIATE REACTIONS from
women but then backfired, because it caused them to
feel the whole thing was a bit too MUCH to be natural,
which caused me to have to pull out all the stops on
reestablishing rapport so that the trust was there
again. When I could have just avoided the whole
problem to begin with by using MINIMUM game.
What do I mean by minimum game?
I mean you should use the LEAST effort you need
to get the job done, your face expressions need
to convey emotion, but only the LEAST amount
necessary. The LESS you use, the more CALM
you seem, the more COOL you seem, the less
you seem to be TRYING, the easier it is for her
to not only feel greater trust, but also the more
attracted she can feel since you are obviously
so confident in your value because you are not
trying. Which is how it SHOULD be in the
first place!
If you are chatting up a woman, and your eyebrows
are constantly furrowed, your face always very intent,
it's not good.
Regarding minimum energy, obviously in a
loud club, where the awesome music is playing
and the girls are laughing, etc, it just makes
SENSE that you would be in a good mood
too and in higher e-n-e-r-g-y yourself, so
the face expressions would NATURALLY
be more intense, in fact it you should have
just a bit more pep than the girls have
themselves, so that you are raising the
level of electricity and good times
instead of lowering them and being a
party pooper.
In a bookstore, you would obviously
be more laid back.
However, in BOTH ENVIRONMENTS, your INTERNAL
STATE needs to be tip top, you need to be in
a good state, yet also feeling the
DOMINANCE as well.
Okay, next:
Number two:
START WITH RAPPORT IN "EXCLUSIVE" ENVIRONMENTS When you are in the more exclusive environments
and venues, it often comes across as TRY HARD
if you don't just open up with something very
low-key, rapport related, etc. The reason is
because it's ASSUMED you already have VALUE
walking in, because it's an exclusive environment.
So you in fact have a free pass for OPENING,
and putting in more "game" simply seems like
you are weird, you are trying hard, etc.
However, this is just for your OPENING.
Everything else is the same.
There's no excuse for weak 'game' or
boring 'game'.
Your delivery, your body language, all count
just as much as always.
And you can still tease too, in fact if you DO
have your inner game down as explained
above, it's a great idea AFTER you have
opened with rapport.
Also, remember that teasing is NOT to come
from an ANGRY or INSECURE place inside, but
from a genuinely PLAYFUL place that is
full of goodwill mixed with confidence.
And all the other emotional stuff like being
intriguing is still a great idea.
So for example, you could open with
a bit of rapport and then attract and
then go into deeper rapport. And of
course this is just an example, in real
life there is always overlap between
attract and rapport/connection. In fact,
many times you will be doing both at
once, because for example your body
language is so good that you are attracting
even as you are chatting rapport stuff.
And that's just one example.
Number three:
ENDURANCE IS CRITICALEndurance in every respect is IMPORTANT
when it comes to success in approaching
and attracting women. Clients have
seen just how much I mean this in real
life as they watch me demonstrate. So
many guys will EJECT out of an interaction
just because the woman is not initially
doing CARTWHEELS for them.
If you can't endure a little heat, you can't
expect to really develop any of the various
skills involved in mastering these skills or
in getting long-term attraction.
For example, many times, a woman simply
needs MORE TIME and MORE QUALITY
rapport before she is ready to progress
the interaction to a higher level.
So for example, she might question your
motives, or, she might be comfortable but
not sure if you are THE MAN or not, and
she might test to see how confident you
actually are. Or she might just be testing
to see if you are a fun and playful guy
as opposed to a guy who takes everything
so seriously.
If she is doing any of these things, instead
of wanting to eject, you should WELCOME
the situation, because once you recognize
these things for what they are, you can easily
address them and then progress the interaction
with her.
Another important point about endurance
is that you must not get lazy. Sometimes
a guy will finally develop the attitude of
being indifferent toward the outcome,
but he then uses this to become lazy
and sloppy in his interactions because
he doesn't care what happens.
Just because you are no longer insecure
about getting a woman's approval does mean
you can run a sloppy interaction with a woman
because you are tired or feeling silly.
It doesn't matter if you've had a long day
or if it's your first approach of the day
or your hundredth.
If you are going to do it, then get yourself
together and do it RIGHT. Be a professional.
Think of it like lifting weights:
Even if you are tired, you still have to
watch your FORM or you can do more
damage than good. Don't give in to
the temptation to get sloppy on your
form in your pick-ups either.
Next point!
Number four:
DO YOU WANT IT? THEN DO IT.This is my basic philosophy regarding
approaches in all supposedly "weird"
situations, and in fact ALL situations.
On a related note, when I say "DO IT",
I mean really COMMIT to it.
Don't just do it weak "namby pamby" style,
you know what I mean?
An example of namby-pamby style, is when
you see a woman, or a group of women that
you'd like to approach, and due to fear, you
end up speaking too QUIETLY, or you
don't REALLY give the eye contact, you
just give them eye contact for a sec and
then you look away to give yourself an
exit strategy.
I say SCREW the exit strategy, and instead
actually DO IT, and COMMIT to your
decision to SPEAK to her or to the group
of women.
You can't do it HALF way, or the women
will likely NOT notice you or they will
IGNORE you, because attractive women
HAVE to have strategies to deal with the
endless guys who ogle them.
If you want to succeed then you have to
follow what I say and not just do it
namby-pamby, but do it for REAL.
There's really no excuse NOT to approach.
It costs you NOTHING.
It takes very little TIME, unless it's going
WELL, in which case that' exactly what you
WANT.
It's FUN. Seriously, this stuff is FUN.
It wouldn't be fun if there was no drama
or excitement. I think this is just one
of the reasons I prefer real life rather
than online, because it's actually FUN.
Even if let's say your approach requires
you to do something "weird" like going
into a store where only women go, like
a makeup store, who cares? Although
it is true that these environments require
that you calibrate your approach for
the environment, i.e. "you are there
waiting for someone (not girlfriend)
to get something", it's not as strange
to the women as you might think.
Moreover, if you are doing a proper approach,
they won't care much, because you will have
them emotionally compelled and the logical
stuff of what the heck you are doing there
will be irrelevant.
They are still women who still want to meet men.
The location is not as big a deal as most men
THINK it is.
And it costs you NOTHING.
It's just that you THINK "oh my gosh
my big fat ego might not be able to
take it if it doesn't go well" or "what
will they DO to me if I get "caught"
trying to pick them up"? And this
is the funniest thing of all if you
think about it, because you are
falling for what women have
CREATED as an illusion:
The idea that they don't want
men to approach them.
By creating this illusion, women are
able to "raise the cost" of being with
them. After all, if they don't want
men and sex, etc., and you DO want
it, then THEY are in the driver's seat.
I don't blame women for creating this
illusion, because it was a way women
were able to survive in an old society
where women had little power, but
today it's RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!!!
And yet STILL men are falling for it!!!!
Women aren't forcing any man to follow it,
but most men think that somehow women
are the ones in the superior position,
even though women tend to be culturally
pressured to be more passive about
meeting men, when men can in reality be
active and choose which women they speak to.
Women want to be approached by guys, but
it has to be by guys who understand all
this stuff and don't use it to make
women feel bad, but use it to make
women feel good.
And if you are reading this right now and
feeling finally AWOKEN to VITAL insights
for your success with women, I assure you
that this is just the BEGINNING.
My ATTRACTION MASTERY PROGRAM
is complete, and will give you the FULL PICTURE.
This program is a quantum leap forward
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explicit detail how to ignite the deepest
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including how to deal with any guy
who tries to interfere with your
approach as you chat up a woman
because he wants to get her himself.
This program is CRUCIAL for any man
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CHOICE when it comes to meeting and
attracting women ANYWHERE.
And you can now own it and start using it
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YOU want.
Just go to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
And if you haven't yet downloaded my program
"Obliterating Approach Anxiety", then definitely
do that NOW.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/obliterating.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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