Before I start today, I just want to make
one thing really clear, and that is the
difference between FANTASY and REALITY
when it comes to getting women.
The more you get the REAL THING, the
less you care about the FAKE thing.
Most men figure they will NEVER get the
kind of women they want.
So it is the most natural thing in the
world to then really, REALLY enjoy
things like Playboy or Penthouse.
The women there are touched up with makeup,
they are presented in certain angles and
lighting, and they have certain expressions
on their faces, etc. All designed to enhance
the fantasy.
Similar thing with strippers at strip clubs.
Now, like I said, fantasy is NORMAL when
the REALITY is not there.
For example, I LOVE the Star Wars original
movies with Luke Skywalker, etc.
Part of the fantasy is the POWER of the "Force",
(which is not clearly defined, which makes it
even easier to believe in, for one can define it
in a way that is real to themselves).
And of course, there is the fact that I LOVE the idea of flying an "X-Wing" spacecraft but I probably will NEVER actually fly an X-Wing fighter spacecraft, probably never get to battle Darth Vader with a lightsaber, and probably not get to go on the same adventures with R2D2 and C3PO.
So I LOVE the FANTASY of it!
When I fantasize about it when watching the
movie, I FORGET it is a fantasy and I get
to actually FEEL the fantasy for a while.
But when it comes to WOMEN, when you actually
GET the kind of attractive woman or women you
like for REAL, you simply don't feel the same
DESIRE for the FANTASIZING elements.
It is like being Superman for real and then
fantasizing about flying. You are doing it
for REAL so you do not fantasize about it.
But there is one MORE element to this that
most men never realize:
REALITY is far MORE powerful than FANTASY.
And what I mean by this, is that, let us say
you meet a woman who is a genuine NINE in
terms of her looks, and a genuine TEN in
terms of her personality.
And you have her, bent over the couch,
she is panting your name in obsessive
lust for you, she is begging for your
body, she is totally yours, crazy for
you in every way.
You see the beads of sweat on her QUIVERING body, you behold the contours of her every curve, and again it strikes you- she is totally YOURS.
I can ASSURE YOU that this is going to
be a TRILLION TIMES more ELECTRIFYING
than fantasizing about a woman who is
in a magazine or video, even if the
magazine and video has all the lighting,
makeup, and specially chosen angles
for photo or video recording.
The REAL THING CRUSHES the fantasy thing
by a ratio of about a TRILLION to one.
That is one of the reasons my "Real World
Bootcamp" is called "The Real World Bootcamp".
Until one experiences the real thing, it
is very hard to even FATHOM how powerful
it is, because until that point, FANTASY
is the only thing that exists.
And most men will never even TRY to learn
the REAL THING. This is why porn is a
BILLION DOLLAR INDUSTRY.
Most men DO NOT KNOW HOW to get the real thing.
And now, I would like to give you EIGHT super powerful tips on how to GET the REAL THING, how to not only get an attractive woman, but a woman who is also a fantastic quality woman who would be a great
girlfriend.
These tips will work for you even if
you don't know ANY women or have ANY
"connections" to a social network at ALL.
How To Get A Girlfriend Tip 1:
GET INTO THE "JUICY" CONVERSATION RIGHT AWAY!
So, let's say you are already approaching
women and starting conversations, you
might notice that women will just be polite.
You aren't seeing their eyes light up.
Keep in mind that this woman has no idea
who you are, she has no idea that you have
gone through a lot in this life, that you are
not only a good person, but a pretty cool
person as well. She knows NOTHING
about you.
And you can't start listing your resume there.
So the ONLY thing SHE can judge you on here
is the conversation she's having with you and
how it FEELS to her.
So, you have to get her into "FEELING" state
pretty darn fast.
Now, you do NOT want to overcompensate
with becoming a CLOWN or PERFORMER.
You should start the conversation with something
low-key, like if you were at a card store and you
were commenting on the choice of card she is
holding, i.e. a father's day card, and telling her
she must have a close relationship with her dad
to buy such a card, etc.
THEN however you want to UP the ante pretty
fast, to BUILD from there. You want to get
her FEELING damn good. So you might go
from there into something that is either very
INTERESTING, or something that is very funny,
or something that truly raises her self-esteem
and makes her feel better about herself, you
can CHOOSE whatever fits best for your personality.
EXAMPLE:
So, giving the example of the woman at
the card store, you can go HUMOROUS
by telling her that she's just trying to butter
up her dad so he can buy her a Jaguar...
..Or you can go into the INTRIGUING and
genuinely meaningful compliment that raises her
self-esteem by speaking about how girls who get
along well with their dads tend to be the girls
who have less drama issues- and this would
PROMPT a response from her that was a lot
more involved on her part- it wouldn't just be
her trying to get rid of you, since now she is
actually engaged in something meaningful to her.
Also, you could COMBINE the above, and go
from humorous/funny, to the more serious and
intriguing and raising self-esteem style
conversation.
COMBINING emotions is a VERY powerful thing.
Imagine if you get a woman laughing, then get
her feeling intrigued, and then feeling better
about herself, all within a span of just a few
MINUTES.
You are going to be MEMORABLE.
You are going to be the guy she wants to CALL,
and all the other guys that just ogled her or said
trivial stuff to her will not even be REMEMBERED.
If you aren't getting the conversation into
the right EMOTIONAL ZONE very
QUICKLY, it's no surprise that your
interactions aren't amounting to any
results.
How To Get A Girlfriend Tip 2:
SHOW A BIT OF INTEREST WHEN SHE HAS EARNED IT.
Be down to earth and real.
This is a huge factor in being successful
when it comes to how to get a girlfriend.
Most guys are trying so hard to show they
are not interested, because they are told
by the "dating gurus" and pick up artists
that this will make the woman more interested-
so the guys end up standing way too far from
the women, and talking from too much of a
distance, and the guys try to also avoid ANY
type of comment that might sound like they
are interested.
The truth is that although you shouldn't give
compliments for the sake of compliments,
you SHOULD reward a woman for the
things that she really EARNED.
The KEYWORD here though is EARNED.
If you give compliments or if you seek
rapport for things she didn't EARN,
you are behaving as an underling,
a needy desperate guy.
HOWEVER, once she has EARNED it,
it's an entirely different matter.
So if she is telling you things that you really
find worthy of respect or interest, well then
you actually MUST show and tell her this,
because it is actually a way of letting her know
that she stands OUT from the rest, that she is
NOT just another woman, that you are NOT
just looking at her from a superficial point
of view.
How To Get A Girlfriend Tip 3:
BE AWARE OF THE EMOTIONAL VIBE OF THE SITUATION
Ignoring this is a MAJOR factor in screwing up attraction.
This often stems from not being present
in the moment, and being too caught up
in trying to achieve a certain outcome.
This pressure to achieve a certain outcome
is like a constant ALARM blaring in your
ear that prevents you from actually listening
properly and from FEELING what a woman
is actually feeling and trying to convey to you.
A lot of communication, in fact most of it,
is not in the words themselves, so if you are
ONLY listening to a woman's WORDS and not the
full depth of the tonality, expression, and
context behind those words, then you are often
missing what her real message is.
Here's a helpful hint- most of the time,
a woman is just trying to feel good, like
all humans do. So rather than focusing
on how you can show off how smart
you are, instead think about how you
can be CREATING A GOOD VIBE.
If she is talking about something a bit sad,
i.e. some tragedy or war, then don't show
off how much you know about that issue,
rather you should create RAPPORT to make
her feel understood, and then gently LEAD
the conversation to somewhere more
POSITIVE.
Look for the bright side of things, and
the reality is that if not for negative things,
there would BE no positive side, so if the
conversation is not going down the right
track, it's just another OPPORTUNITY
for you to create AWESOME emotions
where they didn't exist before, and that
makes you even cooler than every
other guy who couldn't do that.
A woman will not remember the details of
the conversation, she will only remember
how she FELT during it. So make it feel
GOOD.
Listen when she is speaking, listen for what
is the EMOTIONAL crux of what she is
saying, don't just be thinking of how you
can be the most cool guy to show how
you can give the most clever response.
The most clever response is the response
that simply FEELS good. You'll get
farther by NOT showing off then you
would by showing how clever and
"cool" you are. Don't put yourself
down of course, just don't make it
all about YOU. And that's how
she will remember YOU.
How To Get A Girlfriend Tip 4:
PROGRESS THE INTERACTION!
An interaction has natural stages,
you start off low key, you build
up steam and connect to each other,
and then you have to get her contact
info.
Out of fear, most guys will just stay
in whatever stage they are in, because
it feels good to not be rejected. However,
if you don't PROGRESS the interaction
to getting her number, and from getting
her number, to getting the date, to
getting physical, to relationship, etc,
etc, then what is the point?
So often, guys will open up a conversation
with something low key, and the women
will be receptive, but then the guys
STAY in that zone the entire time
because it feels good to get that
validation and they don't want to risk
LOSING that sense of validation.
So MOVE THE INTERACTION FORWARD.
How To Get A Girlfriend Tip 5:
BE FLIRTATIOUS!
If you are trying to meet a woman, then it's
CRUCIAL that she understands that there is
a sexual tension to the interaction.
So, the key to being more flirty and sexual
is being more PLAYFUL in your interaction,
combined with having a bit of a mischievous
glint in your eye.
How To Get A Girlfriend Tip 6:
DON'T "OVERCOMPENSATE" FOR INSECURITIES
This is a HUGE one. We all fear not being
accepted, because of whatever it is we are
insecure about. So what do we do? We
OVERCOMPENSATE for that insecurity,
and we don't even realize it. It usually
comes across as either being insecure
or what is worse, as being a JERK.
If you start a conversation by trying to
protect yourself against your fear, usually
it will work AGAINST you.
For example, if you very early in a
chat said something like "superficial
things are so over-rated, I would never
be caught working for a big corporation",
that would be an example of this.
If you're bald, if you're short, if you're
ANYTHING you are insecure about- the reality
is that it's NOT an issue but if you START
with "Hi, my name is Mac, would you date
a short guy?" then you clearly are showing
that this is a major obsession or fear.
Same with, "Hi, I make peanuts, but
I LOVE what I do" that also shows that
you are obsessed with the issue since
it's the first thing you brought up.
Just be comfortable in your own skin, and
don't bring up the issue at all. There's
a lot more to you than you think, a lot
more to you than the things you are
insecure about.
This rule also applies for not trying to
explain anything about yourself or situation
that you think is not cool- so if your are
renting a car because your regular better
car is at the shop, don't say, "This is
just a rental- I have a better car".
Just DON'T BRING IT UP, otherwise it comes
across as you feeling inferior to her.
And when YOU feel inferior, that is the
ultimate litmus test to a woman of
how desirable you are. YOU are the one
who has to know how desirable you are.
If you don't feel it, how can she?
How To Get A Girlfriend Tip 7:
TAKE IT SLOW. DON'T RUSH IT AND REVEAL
TOO MUCH ABOUT YOURSELF TOO EARLY!
Now, the problem with this is that it is
the behavior of someone who feels that
he is going to get rejected.
So, if you just approached a woman, don't
start telling her within 30 seconds "man,
I'm so tired, I just got in from LA" or
"I'm so tired, I was up all night with
my agent on the phone" etc, etc.
It's OBVIOUS to her that you are throwing
around the words "LA" and "AGENT".
How To Get A Girlfriend Tip 8:
ADD EMOTIONAL DEPTH TO THE CONVERSATION.
What this means is that a quality woman
who is looking for a real relationship
is seeking someone who has an appreciation
for more than JUST sex.
This does NOT mean to BORE her with some
lecture crammed with statistical data.
Instead, what this means, is to incorporate
an element of INTRIGUE into your conversation
that has powerful emotional RELEVANCE to
her life.
For example, asking her the following question,
even as a conversation starter, would be great:
"What do you think of the phrase,
'Don't die with the song still in you?' "
This is the kind of question (by the way, I got this from a great woman, so it comes right from the source) that gets the EMOTIONAL GEARS WORKING, and has MEAT to it that can provide the fuel for a great conversation, and then you can THEN sprinkle in some playfulness LATER.
For example, let's say you are both
chatting about this topic for a few minutes,
you can then say, "Wow this is pretty deep,
look what you caused here! Instead of having
a meaningless conversation, you got me going
deep! That's it, from now on, we are talking
about Justin Bieber and Beyonce!"
This way, you get her laughing and feeling
that you have a full personality, the kind
of man that she can see herself with in
all the various contexts of a long term
relationship.
Those are 8 SUPER IMPORTANT tips on how to
get a girlfriend that you can now go out
and apply IMMEDIATELY, and you will notice
a MASSIVE difference, TODAY.
And if you are reading this right now and
would like to get the FULL PICTURE on
how to get a girlfriend and on the topic of
how to talk to women, I suggest that you
download my "Chats From Scratch"
MP3 audio program.
I've devoted an entire jam-packed 1-hour audio
program to showing you how to talk to women
and how to build a connection with women so
that they can easily become girlfriends!
In this program, I demonstrate for you on a
woman who is a GENUINE 10 in both her looks
(drop dead gorgeous) and her CHARACTER,
and you'll learn EXACTLY how to approach a
woman who is a total stranger using the
special strategies that you will only find in
this course.
To make the program even MORE effective, we
demonstrated the conversation WORD FOR WORD,
from beginning at ZERO all the way to ATTRACTION
where you could do whatever you want- including
taking her number, going out with her for a coffee,
tea, or drink, or hanging out with her wherever you
both just met.
I’m talking from TOTAL SCRATCH all the way to
ATTRACTION.
And, for even MORE benefit to you, we showed what
the conversation would be in DIFFERENT TYPES OF
ENVIRONMENTS- because for example the way you
approach a woman at a bookstore, is very different
from the energy and style you would use at an upscale
classy club where there is music and an atmosphere
of good times and partying.
This program contains TONS of crucial insights,
strategies, and dating tips for men on the topic
of how to get a girlfriend and how to meet women.
Let me make it absolutely and perfectly clear:
You will learn how to meet women.
You will learn how to talk to women.
You will learn how to attract women.
You will learn how to build a deep connection with a woman.
And you will absolutely learn how to get a girlfriend
who is not only beautiful but who is also serious
about wanting a real relationship with you.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/chats.html
And if you've been reading these newsletters,
you probably already know about my Real World
Bootcamp program where I not only demonstrate
how to do all this for you in person on women
in real life, but I also provide the expert
personal coaching for you on your approaches
on women as well.
The benefit of this program is that it saves
you TIME because you have me there to fine-tune
your approaches, and to immediately eradicate
any errors you are making, thereby skyrocketing
your results with women INSTANTLY.
Most men NEVER get these skills, even after
a LIFETIME of guessing. Bootcamp gives
you the skills in just 2 DAYS.
Over ten years, I have tweaked this program so
that it is the ultimate program for mastering
the skills to attract quality women.
Bootcamp is at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/bootcamp-sign-up.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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