Are you ready for the BIGGEST MISTAKE that most
men make when it comes to success with women?
Well here it is: Most men focus on doing things
that give women feelings of 'LOGICALLY SHOULD'
rather than 'MASSIVELY WANT'.
In other words, most guys focus on doing things
that make women feel like they OWE the guys
something, instead of making the women feel
they DESIRE the guys.
I'm not saying that men do this on purpose,
it is simply what most men do, because
they think it will ultimately work to
also attract women.
Most men seem to behave as if a woman's
attraction to a man could GROW out of logic
if there are just enough logical reasons for
a woman to be with a guy. I used to think
the same way.
So, for example, putting in lots of WORK in
trying to set up a fancy date, being willing to
do favors for women, helping women out in all
kinds of ways, ranging from helping them with
their homework to offering to do just about
any other WORK for them.
OR, just buying these women nice gifts or
presents, etc., etc., etc.
OR being an extremely nice-guy to them by
flattering them or just being super-sensitive
to them, etc.
Now, none of those things are BAD, once
a woman has MASSIVELY EARNED them from
you by treating you like absolute GOLD.
However, doing those things for a woman BEFORE
she has treated you like GOLD not only does not HELP,
it actually REPELS her for one BIG reason:
It creates a feeling of BURDEN on her.
If you do all these nice things for a woman,
before she has earned them from you, she
feels she 'owes' you something now.
When a woman feels she owes you because you
were so nice to her, she simply wants to get RID
of that feeling of OWING you, and she wants
to get RID of that feeling as soon as possible.
So when a guy approaches her with the super
nice guy act, it immediately triggers feelings of
PAST memories of guys she 'OWED', who she possibly
forced herself to stay with (i.e. she reasoned
with herself and felt she should try to make it
work) but she was not feeling attracted toward
and she remembers the feelings of boredom or of
resentment that she had, etc., etc.
So she will either ignore the guy or give him the
polite, 'Thanks, but goodbye I have to go'.
It is NOT that women want to be abused or that
they do not appreciate good treatment.
If you work with women who treat you decently
or if have platonic female friends, then of
course treat them decently the same way you
would anyone else.
It is simply that these extra nice things are
NOT relevant from a SEXUAL ATTRACTION standpoint
before women actually feel attracted themselves.
In fact, from a SEXUAL ATTRACTION standpoint,
these 'nice' things are WORSE than not relevant,
they actually stir feelings of PRESSURE, and of
resentment, or of burden, or guilt, or boredom -
when introduced too soon or used too often.
The human mind tends to focus on what it is LOSING.
So, if you make a woman feel PRESSURE to be with you
for LOGICAL reasons such as you being nice, but not
because she feels RAW ATTRACTION, her mind will
focus on how she is LOSING the ability to CHOOSE
and to be with whoever she WANTS.
So she obviously will then want to be FREE of you.
Also, since she knows she 'has' you, she is now
more likely to start wondering if there is something
'bad' in this deal, if there is something negative
about you, etc.
It is a bit of the 'grass looks greener on the
other side' effect. Since she feels she 'has' you,
she feels you are the grass on her side.
(Once you ARE in a relationship, it is healthy if
you both know that you both obviously 'have' each other,
but even then, there is still a need to keep things
fun and to still be the right kind of challenge).
However, when it comes to approaching a woman, if you
focus on ATTRACTION and you do NOT put ANY pressure
on her, and if you actually make it clear that you
are NOT easy to get, and if you in fact playfully
and figuratively push her AWAY, well THEN she will
focus on all the things she might lose by LOSING you,
and she will then focus on how to PREVENT losing you.
And she will be focused on how to GET you, not
because of LOGICAL reasons, but rather because she
will be feeling an emotion, an emotion called PAIN
OF LOSS. She is actually FEELING THE PAIN of
possibly losing you.
And this is not a bad thing. When someone feels
ATTRACTION, then there is the possibility for both
pleasure and pain, for without the thought of the pain
of LOSING you, there would not be the same PLEASURE
from the thought of BEING with you.
So, yes, you are actually giving her MORE feelings
of ATTRACTION, of DESIRE, of ECSTASY, from
incorporating the PAIN of LOSS and from NOT being
such a NICE guy in the stereotypical sense.
THEN, once she feels ATTRACTION, well THEN
she will CHERISH the nice things you do and it
will be PLEASURABLE and APPRECIATED, as long
as you do not overdo it and as long as you
do not become too predictable.
So, the next time you see a woman you want to
chat with, focus on all the things that spark
EMOTION and STAY AWAY from all the things that
create that feeling of 'Damn, this guy is being
so nice I feel I SHOULD be with him.'
Instead of complimenting her, TEASE her
in a playful way. For example, if she rubs
past you on the train or bus, you can tell her
that you expect her to buy you dinner first.
When she laughs or responds, keep the tease
going by saying, 'I am totally serious!' with
a smirk, telling her you are sick of women
treating you like a purely physical object for
lovemaking and that you want to be loved for
your genius as well.
Instead of offering to do her a favor, convey
POWER and AUTHORITY through your voice
tonality. That will make her MORE LIKELY
to later OFFER to do favors for YOU, and
she will be a lot more likely to be THRILLED
to do a favor for you, rather than doing
a favor for you as a form of 'something
she owes you'.
When a woman is ATTRACTED to you, she
WANTS to do favors for you. Doing
favors for you makes her feel GOOD.
Instead of flattering her, help her look UP
to YOU by teaching her something quickly
that is useful. Whether it is about health,
about working out, about travel, or anything
else that may be important.
Instead of asking her for a formal date, invite
her to something you are ALREADY doing, whether it
is a game of pool, a workout, a trip to the mall,
or heading to the coffee shop. KEEP IT CASUAL and
you remove all forms of that feeling of
pressure/burden/owing.
And do not MELT when you see that all this
is WORKING.
So many times, a guy will take my advice, and
GET the girl attracted and she becomes all giggly
and girly and feminine when just before she seemed
like an ice-queen.
The guy will follow my advice, and he will see
the girl transform into this warm, loving creature
and now the guy feels that it is somehow WRONG
of him to not be SUPER NICE immediately, so he
MELTS and suddenly his voice loses the authority,
he starts packing on the compliments, and he
starts conveying all the ways he would be a
great, steady, trustworthy boyfriend, and that
in fact he wants to begin the relationship
as soon as possible.
He thinks that he is being 'indirect' by talking about
all his good qualities for being a great boyfriend in
what he thinks are subtle ways, but the woman
IMMEDIATELY recognizes this for what it is,
and what it is, is NEEDINESS and insecurity,
and it symbolizes everything that is NOT cool
or attractive.
Suddenly, the whole VIBE reverses and she now
LOSES that feeling of attraction and starts to feel
the owing/burden/resentment/boredom feeling.
She starts to close up, become less talkative,
her gaze starts to drift away.
When I say BE THE MAN, trust me, I MEAN IT.
I have seen the sweetest girly-girls who are all nice
and lovey-dovey and who cannot wait to get naked,
suddenly FLIP almost INSTANTLY when presented with the
'I owe you' burden/resentment/boredom feeling
triggered by the WRONG actions.
And I have seen the reverse as well, women who,
on the SURFACE, may have SEEMED like they were
TOTALLY COLD, totally oblivious to the world,
with headphones on, dressed super hot, who totally
KNEW how hot they were, and they MELTED and became
girly-girly submissive when presented with the RIGHT
actions and behaviors.
It is up to you: Choose the path that makes women want
to get AWAY from you, even though there are a million
logical reasons women 'SHOULD' be with you, OR choose
the path that actually gets women massively ATTRACTED
to you, even if there are a million reasons women
'should NOT' be with you.
The 'SHOULD' path NEVER works, it always ends up FAILING.
The only path that WORKS is the ATTRACTION path.
It is a new year now. Get it started RIGHT.
Sign up for my Real World Attraction Bootcamp NOW,
before this entire year is sold out. Bootcamps sell
out FAST, it is one of the reasons I do not mention
it that much, because there is no point in announcing
something that is sold out.
In bootcamp, you are learning LIVE, in the
real world, and you will be approaching women
and mastering the art of pick up as I teach you
EVERYTHING, one-to-one as your exclusive instructor.
Bootcamp is at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/bootcamp-sign-up.html
And if you have not yet downloaded my very FIRST book,
The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, then
do that NOW.
This E-Book is the FOUNDATION, where it all begins.
It is at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Wizard.html
If you already have this book, you know how
powerful it is, and you will LOVE my Attraction
Mastery Program, which is the NEXT LEVEL for
getting women attracted in a physical way, from
exactly what to do the moment you see them anywhere
all the way to the last step of getting women
into bed with you.
This program contains all vital and NEW strategies
and concepts for success with women- these
strategies and concepts are NOT found in my
other programs or books.
Download this special program IMMEDIATELY and
skyrocket your results with women NOW.
It is at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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