the BIRTH of attraction. Seeing how a woman
goes from thinking "you are a stranger" to
"I want to get CLOSER to this stranger".
I call this process Attraction GENESIS,
and I get to help men make it happen with
women in my "Beyond PUA Bootcamps"
so there are a lot of real-life details that
I can share with you that make all the
difference between success and failure.
One of the factors that makes the whole process
of triggering attraction in a woman complex is that
our OWN emotions get in the way of us being able
to effectively trigger HER emotion of attraction.
So, for example, the only reason a guy does NOT
approach a woman when he knows he should, is
because of the way it makes him FEEL.
The emotion of "should approach her" is not as strong
as even the POTENTIAL emotion of "feeling like a
LOSER for being rejected".
I say POTENTIAL, because the guy doesn't even know
that he will be rejected, but the POSSIBILITY of it
is enough. IN fact, the IMAGINED POSSIBILITY
of it is actually WORSE than a rejection itself.
Extreme FEAR of things is the REAL enemy, it's
far bigger of a destroyer than whatever thing
itself is being feared.
And that's just talking about making the DECISION
to APPROACH a woman.
But how about the ACTUAL conversation itself?
The success or failure of this is ALSO massively
affected by which emotional state you are in.
You see, EMOTIONS feel more TRUE, more
IMPORTANT than facts.
People like to say that women are more emotional
than men, but the fact is that human BEINGS
are emotional, or none of us would BE human.
Emotions are our evolutionary predecessors
to things like logic, they helped us take
ACTION when we didn't have TIME to think
because we were being chased by some
tiger or whatever else was the urgent issue.
These ancient emotions have not had time to
evolve and adapt to our current realities in the
year 2012.
So, for example, we see THREATS in a lot of
situations where they don't exist. Maybe
a hundred thousand years ago, going up
to a woman and not getting instantaneous
cartwheels and physical action was
a major catastrophe, maybe in those days
since we lived in small tribes, EVERYONE
found out and somehow it really DID
affect your luck with women in the future.
But NOW, it's RIDICULOUS!
It does NOT affect you!
The other 3 BILLION women on the planet
will NOT know about your little fun you
had when chatting to some woman, whether
or not you got her number or got in bed etc.
The GOOD NEWS is that you can CONTROL
which emotions you want to experience,
you can CHOOSE which emotions will
serve you BEST for your goal, and it
all starts with awareness.
The next key, after awareness, is CHANGING
THE MEANING of the event so that it creates
the RIGHT emotional state in you.
And since you already KNOW that
many of the current meanings you
associate to the various elements
of pick-up are FACTUALLY WRONG
and are ABSURD today, then you
should be very OPEN to the idea
of REFRAMING those situations
to have DIFFERENT meanings,
meanings that are more in tune
with REALITY.
So for example, going up to a woman
to chat with her, no matter what,
should be viewed as an opportunity
to prove to yourself that YOU
control your own actions, and NOT
some outdated programming from
a hundred thousand years ago.
View it as a chance to exercise your FREEDOM.
A CHALLENGE to your own FREE WILL.
Are you a slave to your evolutionary past?
Or can you control your destiny?
Remember too, that on top of any evolutionary
hard-wiring, we have also been brainwashed
to think that in fact we SHOULD be looking at
picking up a woman as something SUPER
SERIOUS, where everything is on the line.
So it's an ENVIRONMENTAL influence that
is also having a huge effect on us, but the
REALLY GOOD news is that we can
TOTALLY change our environment!
Get friends that actually ENCOURAGE
you! Get a personal coach like me
to be there for you! Start ACTIVELY
filtering the messages you get from people
with the wrong beliefs.
We get the wrong type of brainwashing
from friends, from media, from family,
because the whole "Am I Good with Women"
thing is blown out of proportion so
that we think OUR IDENTITY is based
on it. So of COURSE we become way
too serious about it.
We are FEELING that going up to a woman
is DANGEROUS, and even though it's really
NOT, the fact is that EMOTIONS feel more
TRUE than FACTS!
And the crazy thing, the irony, is that being
SERIOUS in the sense of feeling FEAR is
the WORST emotion for triggering attraction!
It FREEZES up all the OTHER emotional states,
it paralyzes them, and yet it's those OTHER
states that make you SUCCESSFUL with women.
You don't have to BECOME confident.
You just have to get RID of the negative stuff.
Confidence IS the LACK OF INSECURITY.
When you get rid of the DOZENS of variations
of insecurities, all of a sudden you really
FEEL that a DIFFERENT SET OF FACTS
are true. And the only reason you BELIEVE
this is because of the way you FEEL.
And yet, because you FEEL this NEW way,
you are now able to ACCESS those NEW
parts of your emotions that you haven't
felt before in these situations. And you
will behave in a TOTALLY different
way than before, right down to the
tiniest subtleties which count BIG TIME.
If you can FEEL playful, you can also BE
PLAYFUL, because the FEELING actually
CHANGES the way you PERCEIVE reality,
so you will start to SEE THINGS IN A
PLAYFUL AND FUNNIER WAY.
You will REALLY MEAN IT when you
say something funny, it WON'T be
some contrived line. You will be
CERTAIN it's funny, because YOU
will FEEL it to be funny. You will
be convinced that it's funny and
that there is NO WAY anyone can
argue that it's NOT, because again,
you FEEL it, and a FEELING always
SEEMS TRUER THAN ANY FACT!
So the problem is not emotions, it's just
making sure you are feeling the RIGHT
emotions that will serve you productively.
So, if you want to, for example, be more
PLAYFUL and actually be FUNNY, then
the way to GET INTO THAT PLAYFUL
STATE is for you to start LOOKING AT
THINGS from playful perspectives, for
YOUR OWN AMUSEMENT, not for
GIRLS.
Again, the key is to do this for your OWN
AMUSEMENT, this way, you will actually
FEEL it. And that will make your delivery
PERFECT. You won't seem like the guy
who is nervously trying to be funny.
If you take the train to work, don't just
sit there, think about things you see
in NEW WAYS, ways that are FUNNY.
CHANGE the meaning of the situation
by looking the situation with new
perspectives. Maybe you notice
how many people wear running shoes
even though it's winter and snowing.
Isn't the point of running shoes to be
comfortable? How comfortable is it
to have soaking wet socks from the
snow that leaks in the running shoe?
Now, share that with the woman next
to you!
Your environment gives you INFINITE material.
Learn at first to do this stuff for your
OWN enjoyment.
Then, SHARE it with the woman you want to chat to!
If you want to become more interesting and
intriguing, then YOU YOURSELF HAVE
TO BECOME INTRIGUED with more
things, you have to allow your mind to
open up and you have to start taking in
a better mental and emotional diet when
it comes to what you read, what you watch
on TV, etc. Maybe it's time to visit the
museum again, or the zoo, or the exhibit
on whatever fascinating topic it might be.
Find what intrigues you.
And there are SO MANY important and powerful
emotions that all have their proper place and time
when you are interacting with a woman. From
dominance, to being challenging, to intimacy
and bonding and trust, to sexual arousal, to
playfulness, to moments of seriousness, to
unpredictability, to creating curiosity,
and more.
And beyond ALL THIS STUFF, is how you
STEER the interaction while CHATTING
to a woman, as you gauge HER emotional
state. Because you see, the point is that
you want to lead her into ever better states
as well, from the fun to the appropriately
sexual for the situation, to the intriguing,
to the deeper levels of trust and intimacy.
Of course, to do that, you have to actually
FEEL that it's important, so if you really
just want to USE a woman and you don't
really care about her, then I guess that
type of guy is going to be up a creek
without a paddle.
And to actually get a woman to feel so good
that she becomes ADDICTED to you, you need
to have the deepest understanding of how
your OWN emotions work, as well as how
a WOMAN'S emotions work. Remember,
men and women are not conditioned the same.
If you'd like to learn how to become a
MASTER at creating compelling emotions in
women to the point they are ADDICTED to you,
then get started on that NOW by getting my
Attraction Mastery Program.
If you don't currently have this program,
I can assure you that this program is
LOADED with ESSENTIAL insights on how
to get a woman so deeply attracted to
you, that she will be yours FOREVER.
You can either trust me and enjoy the
results of this program, and have a
woman you are crazy about who is just
as in love with YOU, or you can decide
to spend the next ten years trying to
figure it all out through trial and error.
This program will show you how to unleash
the deepest emotions in women, step by step,
in vivid DETAIL.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
You can't possibly go wrong with this program.
Men all across the planet, in just about
every country, are currently using this
program to get the women of their choice.
And if you are still stuck in that state of
'approach anxiety' where you see a fantastic
woman you'd love to approach, but you just
can't get yourself to take action, then I
SERIOUSLY suggest you also get my program
on OBLITERATING APPROACH ANXIETY,
which is at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/approach-anxiety.html
This program is the most well-researched and
proven method for obliterating approach anxiety
that exists ANYWHERE. If you are looking to
BEAT approach anxiety, then NOT getting this
program is sheer INSANITY.
This program WORKS.
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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