There's a VERY important newsletter that
I want to get to, it gets to the HEART
of what is so important for attracting
women, and it has nothing to do with
pick-up lines or any other gimmicks.
Before we get to that, there's a VERY
quick bit of news that I need to mention:
So here's the situation:
I've been getting a LOT of emails asking
me for advice, and I do appreciate it.
Here's the thing, though: There's no way
I can answer all of them in a quick time
frame. Even at just 1o minutes per email,
that would be about 10 STRAIGHT NON-STOP
HOURS a day of me doing NOTHING but
answering emails, leaving me with
absolutely zero time to do anything
else at all.
So, I have a new service, it's called
the TEN service. I will spend ten minutes
personally reading and answering your email,
for only ten bucks. This way, you will get
a response WITHIN 24 hours.
If you're interested, just email me your
question AFTER you have ordered your 'TEN'
at:
http://tinyurl.com/9hgjv7a
Got a question about dating, attraction,
or relationships? Order your 'TEN' and
get your questions solved FAST.
Alright, let's get to this newsletter, it's
an extremely important one:
THE ASSERTIVE MAN:
HOW HE ATTRACTS WOMEN
One of the key traits that defines a
MAN as opposed to a player or to a
“nice guy” is that a MAN is assertive,
a player is manipulative, and a nice
guy is submissive.
The nice guy tends to only get the
few women who happen to feel sorry
for him in a poor puppy kind of way.
The manipulative player type ends up
showing some form of confidence compared
to the nice guy but ultimately his true
colors show and he loses a quality woman.
The MAN however, he’s an expert at driving
through life in the ASSERTIVE lane.
Here’s where people get confused though:
They think that the only way to be assertive
is to be “in your face” or “nasty”, and this
makes it really hard to consistently be
assertive for them.
And yet, being assertive is a MASSIVE factor
in what turns on women, and it’s not only
your being assertive with women, but when
women seeing you being ASSERTIVE with
everyone in your life- including at the workplace,
with your friends, family, associates, etc.
What tends to happen with a lot of good guys
is that at some point in our lives a long time
ago, we learned that it’s better to NOT be
assertive, this way we wouldn’t be considered
a “threat” to the bullies, we wouldn’t get
any undue attention, and we would be more
“submissive” just to get along.
Unfortunately, we often eventually EXPLODE
after years and years of bottling up our own
self-esteem and repressing our own dignity
and even repressing our own desires.
Which ends up causing us to go to the OPPOSITE
extreme and blowing up on the people we feel
are being unfair to us. And when we explode,
our behavior is not seen as assertive, it’s seen
as imbalanced and irrational and nasty.
The real answer is to more ASSERTIVE in general,
which solves so many problems and prevents the
build up that can explode later otherwise.
Let me give you an example of a technique
of being more assertive:
THE BROKEN RECORD
In “the broken record” technique, you simply
make sure you know what you want, and you
keep on repeating that every time you hear
the other person saying they want you to do
something else.
This also involves another strategy called
using the “I” statement, because you are
saying it’s YOU who wants or feels something,
thereby taking on full responsibility for how
you feel, and this actually is empowering
because it means you have the right to
express yourself and not have to blame
anyone else for it, and that others should
respect the way you feel.
So here’s how the broken record and the
I statement could work together in a situation:
Let’s say you approach a woman and you chat
and you want to see her again.
Now, you know what you want- you want to
see her again.
Watch how being assertive is actually attractive
here:
You say:
“I enjoyed meeting you. We should meet up.
How’s Tuesday night for some Starbucks and
wonderful conversation with yours truly?”
She says: “Oh, Tuesday night I tutor piano lessons.”
The non assertive guy already feels REJECTED
and then, maybe but not likely, says something,
but it’s very UNSPECIFIC at best, like, “Maybe we can
meet up sometime”.
Being more assertive, he would say:
“I want to see you again. How about before your lesson”
Or even:
“I want to meet up. How about after?
Tuesday is a great day for me, but if it doesn’t
work by you, then let me know what day does.”
If she says a day that does NOT work for you,
like for example Monday, a non assertive man
might AGREE to it just because he doesn’t want
to displease the woman or lose her, and of course
the fear shows up in subtle ways, so even when
he says “yes” he has actually LOST the woman
because she can tell in his body language that
something has just been given up in terms of
his own dignity.
This PERSISTENCE with a relaxed demeanor
shows CONFIDENCE, it shows that you believe
you have value, it shows also on a subtle level
that you get what you want in life, which is
another sign of a winner. And none of this
is being a jerk.
Similarly, when a woman sees how you deal
with pressure from OTHER people in your
life, it can be a turn on for her to see that you
are assertive with them as well.
So let’s say at work everyone is used to taking
advantage of you helping them with their work,
and asking you to do an unfair amount of work.
One of the things you can do here is again
the broken record
Example:
“Ted, I need you to help me this weekend again
with completing the project”
You: “I can’t do that, as I have a major family
engagement this weekend”.
“But this is really important, I don’t know what’s
going on”
“I understand, and I really have a major engagement
this weekend that is going to take all my time.”
You’ll notice that after you keep on STICKING
to your “broken record that keeps repeating”
they will eventually BREAK and give in.
They may say something like:
“Okay, but can you at least sign these forms
That allow me to use the resource centre this
Weekend?”
You: “Yes, I can do that.”
Then they will say thank you, and you’ll say
“you’re welcome.”.
Notice how in the above statements, you
Were using *I* statements and repeating
like a broken record, sticking to your point.
Here’s another thing:
Once you’ve stated your assertive position,
don’t EXPLAIN it for a half hour.
Instead, seal your lips.
By going on and on explaining yourself, you
are actually WEAKENING the entire assertive
core to your message.
This INCLUDES of course in your interactions
with women when you are in a RELATIONSHIP
as well!
Being assertive never ends, from the moment
you meet her, to long after you are having
wild nights together and beyond.
But the thing is, it’s important to realize that
this is a TRANSFORMATION that must come
GRADUALLY and consistently, with an intelligent
ROAD-MAP for how to go about all this so that
you STICK to the path of becoming The Assertive
Man.
Now unlike all the hype out there for everything
from bodybuilding magazines that feature steroid
injected men who claim they got their results
from some workout routine, or the hype out
there from folks who sell pick up artist tactics
and claim they got supermodels from using
pick up artist tactics instead of the real truth
which is that they got nothing of the sort,
what I am teaching you here, as you can see,
actually makes SENSE.
It’s not HYPE.
It’s based on REAL RESEARCH in the real world.
And this is just the tip of the iceberg.
I have MOUNTAINS-FULL of effective strategies
and insights on this topic, including explicit
clear examples of how to apply ALL the
different strategies for skyrocketing your
assertiveness with women all without
coming across as a jerk or arrogant,
and all in a way that feels it’s consistent
with your personality.
To get this important program for success
with women, go here IMMEDIATELY:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/the-assertive-man.html
And to check out ALL my programs for getting
and keeping a fantastic woman, go here:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
For now, tomorrow, and for always, BE THE MAN.
Michael Marks
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