Sunday, April 5, 2015

How To Approach Women Anywhere

You are about to learn some ESSENTIAL
strategies for meeting and attracting women
ANYWHERE.

ONE: SCREEN

This time, I want to start with an important
point that on the surface might not seem
directly related to the approach, but actually
is important to keep in mind about the 
BIG PICTURE regarding your approaches.

It's the whole point of "Get A Great Girl",
but in case you are new here, allow me to
remind you:

Before you begin saying even one word to
a woman you are about to meet, remember 
that during the entire course of the interaction, 
you should adopt the empowered perspective 
of screening.

That means you are making sure that the
woman is right for you, rather than hoping
so hard that she will like you.

This is both an inner-confidence point and also
a very true reflection of the current reality
of the situation out there as a result of feminism
going off the rails and unfortunately confusing
many women on how to behave, and even
confusing many women on what it is that
men really want aside from the physical
aspects of a relationship.

In order to screen, the number one thing
you need to do is OBSERVE since you can't
ask or interrogate her about her values.

Observe her mannerisms, in terms of how
much respect she shows you and others
in the environment. Listen to her responses
to you very carefully. Don't say anything
that will make her feel judged and then
force her to shut herself down from
revealing her true character.

Okay, with that being said, let's get
to the actual 'action' part of the
approach.
 
TWO: DON'T GIVE IT ALL AWAY
BEFORE YOU EVEN START

Most men will STARE at the woman they
are interested in for anywhere from a moment
to several MINUTES before taking action,
IF they ever take action.

Don’t do this. It telegraphs your interest
and your desire and intent to approach.

When a woman has TOO MUCH  TIME to
think about the fact you are going to approach
her, you DESTROY the NATURAL receptivity
that women have toward men, because you allow
her to start THINKING.

It's okay and even good for a woman to KNOW
you are there before you approach, but that should
just last for a moment or two, otherwise you lose
a lot of the magic of the moment.

You don't want to give a woman a lot of time, e.g.
a few minutes, to think about the fact you are there
that you are probably about to approach her.

And this is where the irony kicks in- on one hand,
women are encouraged by feminists to be promiscuous,
but on the other hand they are also told that so many
men are psychos and  rapists.

Now, the truth is, you don’t have to worry about
being labeled as psycho and a rapist just because
you approach a woman, but her fear of this might
just be enough to ruin the moment, and so she will
be too much in defensive mode to be able to let
herself enjoy the interaction with you.

Plus, if you telegraph your interest, you may appear
as if you lack confidence because she will wonder
why else are you hesitating and just looking at her
instead of taking action?

So because of this she may figure you are probably
like all the other men who kiss up to women and
who are desperate and who are under her thumb,
and a woman can’t feel respect or attraction for a
man who feels he is “beneath” her.

THREE: IMMEDIACY OF ACTION

This is related to "not giving it all away before
you even start" but it goes FURTHER.

When you see a woman you’d like to approach,
it is ESSENTIAL that you approach her IMMEDIATELY.

The reason for this is MORE than just not giving
it all away before you start - it has to do with your
OWN state of mind as well.

The LONGER you wait, the more you THINK about
the approach, and the longer you THINK about it,
the LESS NATURAL it is going to be.

It is FAR MORE EFFECTIVE in terms of both your IMMEDIATE results, and your LONG-TERM growth in these skills, to take action IMMEDIATELY than it is to SIT THERE OR STAND THERE for a while trying to come up with an EINSTEIN level  ‘opening’ to the conversation.

This is because WORDS are only PART of the meaning
of any interaction, the rest of the meaning comes from
tonality, body language, facial expressions, context,
timing, etc.

And your tonality, body language, and facial expressions
will automatically convey DECISIVENESS if you indeed
DO take DECISIVE action by NOT standing around
thinking about it!  

In other words, our voice tonalities, facial expressions,
and body language tend to reveal the TRUTH.

So if you HONESTLY took DECISIVE ACTION, if you
DIDN’T HESITATE, if you were COURAGEOUS, you
will be SHOWING ALL THOSE characteristics through
all the non-verbal channels of communication!

And THAT is attractive!

Plus, of course, if she actually sees that you approached
her out of the blue without having to play it so safe by
planning it all out, that TOO is attractive.

On the other hand, if you think about it too much, you will only draw yourself DEEPER into your OWN head, into your OWN thoughts, your own anxieties, your own doubts, and you will come up with INFINITE REASONS why you should NOT approach.

Plus, if she SEES you waiting around trying to figure
it all out, you are making it painfully obvious that you
are lacking conviction in your own worth, and you are
making it obvious that you fear the approach too much.

It’s not cool, it’s not manly, it’s not attractive.

Now, you might be saying, “But Michael, I HAVE
to think about it! I have NO IDEA what to say!”

So, allow me to clear this up for you:

The development of these skills is a PROCESS.
It doesn’t happen INSTANTLY.

It improves with PRACTICE.

And if you practice by spending a long time planning
each approach, it will take you much LONGER to get
these skills down solid than if you actually approach
IMMEDIATELY.

Plus, spending time figuring out what you are going to say ends up teaching  your mind the WRONG LESSON- you brainwash yourself to believe that you NEED to have more “special” things to say than you really DO- because in reality, the goal here is to get so good at these skills that you are able to easily start conversations that last, all in a way that is true to your own personality.

The time to spend thinking about these skills is BEFORE you go out to approach women. Learn the concepts, the strategies, the insights BEFORE you meet women, and then apply them INSTANTLY, the best that you can, when you DO see women you want to meet.

By doing this, you will get a little bit BETTER each time,
you will go from being nervous, to not being nervous, and
then go from only being able to open a conversation, to
being able to open and actually sustain the conversation
for a minute or two, and then go to being able to actually
make the conversations POWERFUL and compelling,
and if you so desire to make them funny, witty, intriguing,
or whatever else you want.

And you will then be able to go to building stronger
CONNECTIONS that BOND the two of you very
quickly.

It happens BIT BY BIT, and you IMPROVE each time.

This INDEED is a SKILL SET that CAN be learned.

I prove it in my bootcamps, EVERYWHERE- whether
we find women in bookstores, on trains, buses, outside
walking on the street, inside in malls, cafes, coffee shops,
supermarkets, college campuses, office buildings, pubs,
clubs, lounges, fairs, conventions, it doesn’t make one
bit of difference- the skills work on women EVERYWHERE.

And if you want to improve as fast as possible,
I say take action IMMEDIATELY – and even if that
action is NOT so great, it is FAR BETTER to your
speed of growth and development than it is to spend
time trying to figure it all out and taking too long to
make the actual approach.

The LESS time you take between seeing the woman
and taking action, the BETTER, regardless of how
crappy you might THINK your action was- it is
actually the way to GROW THE FASTEST- you
WILL improve, and you will also ensure that you
mastered one of the most important principles first,
the principle of taking IMMEDIATE action.

FOUR: BIT BY BIT PROGRESS – FAILURE IS FINE.

As I mentioned above, progress in this skill set
comes BIT BY BIT.

And if you make a BIG DEAL about having to
be PERFECT every time, you are going to stress
yourself out too much and you will not take
ENOUGH action, you will not get enough practice,
to GET good or GREAT at this skill.

The good news here is that you are not performing
surgery, you are not flying a plane, you are not
launching a spacecraft with astronauts on board.

Making a mistake here is PERFECTLY FINE!
Nobody gets hurt!

If you never make mistakes here, it probably means
you are not getting NEARLY enough practice, you
are probably not making NEARLY enough approaches,
you are probably playing it so safe, and planning each
approach for so long, that you will slow down your
progress immensely and possibly never get to the
level you want.

Now, this does NOT MEAN to have a RECKLESS
ATTITUDE toward approaching women.

It doesn’t mean that at all.
You should ABSOLUTELY DO YOUR ULTIMATE BEST
EACH AND EVERY SINGLE TIME.

And this is where the FINE LINE exists between
GREAT LEARNERS and people who are looking for
EXCUSES for AVOIDING EFFORT.

People who make excuses for AVOIDING EFFORT give a
HALF-HEARTED EFFORT, then fail, and then say
“WELL I TRIED”.

Only YOU KNOW how hard you try.

You DON’T have to try so hard that you need a
HOSPITAL after your efforts.

However, you DO NEED TO TRULY PUSH
YOUR COMFORT ZONE- YOU MUST FORCE
YOURSELF THROUGH DISCOMFORT INITIALLY
BEFORE THINGS START TO IMPROVE.

That discomfort may include the anxiety of even starting
the approach, it may include the anxiety of struggling
to figure out what to say next, it may include the anxiety
of worrying what people think, etc, you MUST RESIST
the temptation to BACK out and to EJECT.

RESIST, for as long as you CAN, the PRESSURE to
eject out of the conversation.

Perhaps the first time, you will only last 5 seconds
before the pressure feels too much.

NO PROBLEM, THAT IS FINE.
Now, next time, try to last 6 seconds.
Then maybe 10, then maybe 15, and
so on and so forth.

TRUST ME, I KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING
ABOUT HERE.

You WILL GROW in skill VERY QUICKLY
if you follow this style of learning.

FIVE: DEVELOPING AND APPRECIATING THE ‘CONNECTIVE TISSUE’ BETWEEN CONVERSATION BITS.     

What I mean by this is that when you take this
IMMEDIATE ACTION method for approaching
women, you learn to think quickly on your feet,
and part of this involves focusing on how to
CONNECT one idea you had for STARTING
the conversation to the NEXT idea you might
use to CONTINUE the conversation.

For example, you might approach a woman
at a bookstore with a comment on the book
she is reading, and THAT might be followed
up with ANOTHER comment that people who
read that type of material are usually highly
intelligent, or highly curious, or highly creative,
etc.

Rather than trying to figure out the elements
of the conversation BEFOREHAND, you allow
the MOMENT to present the opportunities to
you, and this way you can be more authentic,
more spontaneous, and you can also ENJOY
the conversation more because you are actually
ACTIVELY involved, rather than just rehearsing
some LINES you wrote in your mind.

The transitions between conversation bits are what I refer to as “connective tissue”, and this ALSO includes your comments to what SHE says to you.

You ability to find and to create this “connective
tissue’ between conversation bits improves with
practice, in both the quality of the ideas you are
using for the connections, and your ability improves
with regards to how FAST you can come up with
these connections. 

SIX: COMMENTS RATHER THAN QUESTIONS

Notice above that I mentioned starting the conversation
with a comment, and then following that with yet another
comment.

You want to start the conversations in a way that feels
GOOD rather than feels awkward or boring.

Starting off a conversation with a woman by just asking
a never ending series of questions is off-putting.

It’s easy to do, but it doesn’t work.
For example:

Hi, what’s your name?         
What are you doing here?
What are you reading there?
What are you drinking?
Do you come here often?
What is that you are holding/wearing?
Do you think a, b, c, etc, etc.?
Do you know where so and so place is?

It sound like an interrogation and can creep out a woman who is a stranger out if you START with the wrong questions or with too many questions.

If you ARE going to ask a question, then MILK the potential of that question.

For example, if you ask a woman what she thinks of a certain famous film, make sure that you COMMENT on her ANSWER in a MEANINGFUL WAY.

So for example, you can try reading her reaction
to a book, a movie, or to anything else, and you can
see what you might learn about her personality, and
see if you can find something POSITIVE about her
personality that is revealed in her answer, and then
give her that authentic compliment, which is very
different than just melting over a woman’s beauty
by giving her endless compliments on it.

SEVEN: START LOW KEY

Now, as I explained earlier, your approach doesn’t
have to start perfectly, but it helps to avoid coming
in with too much interest or with too much teasing.

Sometimes I actually think it’s important for men
to break the rules, and just go up to a woman and
tell her they think she is beautiful, just to see how
nothing bad happens, and how it is okay to convey
your INTEREST in a woman.

So from that point of view, it can be powerful. 

At a higher level, though, it is even better to start off lower key, and neither try to compliment a woman RIGHT OFF THE BAT, and also don’t try to tease her too hard right off the bat either, as it’s better to first establish a bit of small talk first – it actually demonstrates SOCIAL INTELLIGENCE and it demonstrations SOCIAL SKILLS as well.

It indirectly tells a woman that you are clearly able to
have interactions with humans in general as a result
of your conversation skills, so it makes her feel more
relaxed about talking to you as well-  it demonstrates
a certain amount of proof that you are socially savvy.

This is why a comment on something like the book
she is reading, the contents of your shopping cart
at the grocery store, or even a comment on how
long the line is at the coffee shop is a low key start.

From THERE, you are now in the best place to build
momentum to your conversation with her.

EIGHT: CURIOSITY IS KEY

One of the most important elements of a
truly successful conversation is the ability to
AUTHENTICALLY connect with a woman
in terms of understanding what makes her tick.

And the KEY to this is a GENUINE sense of
CURIOSITY.

The more CURIOUS  you are about things, the
BETTER. So, if she is a scientist, a stock broker,
a secretary, a teacher, or she is reading a book on
the Aztecs, a book on biology, or she mentions
she is traveling to a particular destination in the
world, or she mentions she is from a particular
part of the country or the world, or that she is
from a particular culture, ALL THESE THINGS
can be INFINITELY DEEP SOURCES of
CONNECTION, if you are just CURIOUS.

And guess what?
Curiosity is not something you really have to
DEVELOP as much as WAKE UP.

As children, we were ALL CURIOUS.
Give  a child a skateboard, and the child may spend
HOURS trying to figure it out, even if it means falling
down again and again, just to LEARN how it works
and just to learn how to master it.

Children ask ENDLESS QUESTIONS about
EVERYTHING.

It’s just that as ADULTS, through a combination of
TIME DEMANDS that limit our abilities to explore
our curiosities, and through being PUNISHED for
being curious (ever get told that something is a
“stupid” question???? THAT kind of thing makes
someone RELUCTANT to express curiosity or to
explore curiosity) we PUT our curiosity into
HIBERNATE mode.

But it is THERE. 
You just have to RE-AWAKEN it.

And this is where questions ARE a good thing-
questions are a good thing once the conversation
has been going for a few minutes and now she WANTS
to connect with you.

And remember, a woman will ALSO contribute to
the conversation if it is going well, and she may
you questions too.
    
NINE: IT'S NOT A CONTEST

When it comes to getting great at these skills,
there are probably infinite levels of development.

At the core, these skills are about conveying
your personality and connecting with a woman’s
personality quickly, in a smooth way that easily
overcomes the hurdles presented by the fact she
is a total stranger.

Personality is a complex and evolving part of who
you are- it may include your wit, humor, elements of
sexuality, your perspectives, your experiences, your
empathy, and much more.

The more you practice, and the more you develop as
a person, the MORE options you will have at the ready
to use to reflect your personality to her, and to connect
to her, and to understand her.

And yet, women are not holding a PICK UP
ARTIST contest when you meet them. 

If you do a DECENT job in the approach, and you
get her number, and she wants to MEET you again,
that buys you yet ANOTHER opportunity to IMPROVE
upon your first interaction you had with her.

All you have to do is be good enough at least get to
the NEXT STAGE with her, and then the next stage,
and the next, etc. It will probably be a date where
you two bond more together, and then eventually
some more time where you continue to bond and
eventually get to physical intimacy.

So don’t get OVERWHELMED by all that I am
telling you here. 

At the same time, why not look at this as something
ENJOYABLE that is WORTH getting good at?

You WILL improve with practice, and with enough
practice, you indeed CAN become GREAT.          
  
But, just in case you are wondering, even with
just a few WEEKS of practicing every day,
you can be good enough to start meeting and
attracting more women in one WEEK than
you would have done previously in an entire
LIFETIME.

So, that’s just to give you an idea of how much
IMPACT you will make on your life, and how much
BENEFIT you will get in just a few WEEKS of
practice.. 
 
TEN: TONALITY       

I saved the best for last.
Your TONE of voice reflects every last
NUANCE of emotional state that you are
feeling in a given moment, and it is the
FASTEST way to indicate your personality
to a woman.  

The KEY to making this work is to be reflecting
the RIGHT states of mind through your tonality.

I suggest you CONSCIOUSLY control the DELIVERY of your words through your tonality until you INSTINCTIVELY are using the right tonality.

It’s not so important that you have such a deep,
masculine voice, although if you have it, definitely
use it, but what is more important is that you state
your words with FULL CONVICTION behind them.

So often, when a man approaches a woman, the man’s voice pitch suddenly RISES, and this comes from not wanting to offend, it comes from being super careful, almost as if dealing with a child who is in a fragile emotional state, OR as if dealing with someone who is SO IMPORTANT that you don’t want to risk screwing up.

DON’T DO THIS - instead deliver each word as if you were playing the voice of some SUPERNATURAL

SUPER POWERFUL entity that could do NO WRONG, that has INFINITE POWER. 

Say each word as if EACH WORD IS ULTRA IMPORTANT.

So it’s not only about avoiding the rising pitch, it’s
also about not mumbling the words, not swallowing
the words.     

If you don’t think your words have WORTH,
you might swallow them.

If you don’t think a woman wants to HEAR what
you have to say, you might mumble your words.

Don’t.
Imagine each word you have to say is GENIUS.

You MUST give yourself and your words JUSTICE.
If you don’t, then how can you expect HER to in
terms of her PAYING ATTENTION to you?

And when you CONSCIOUSLY control your
voice, you ALSO simultaneously change your
STATE of mind.

Think about an empowering tune or song, like
“Eye of the Tiger”.

You CAN’T sing it if you are not in the right state.
But if you FORCE yourself to sing it, it actually
CHANGES your state.

Your state gets even STRONGER if you adopt
the right BODY language. 

If you are reading this right now, and you are serious about wanting to truly HAVE CHOICES when it comes to women in  your life, so that you have the same power of CHOICE when it comes to women as women have when it comes to men, then the FASTEST way for you to learn these skills is through a private BOOTCAMP with me.

BOOTCAMP is not a playground.
It WILL take work on your part.

And I’m not talking about the physical work,
which does include a lot of walking, I am referring
to EMBRACING THE CHALLENGE to your
EMOTIONS that comes from learning these skills
AND from overcoming your fears.
  
This is about TWO things- it’s not JUST about overcoming fears, it’s ALSO about getting ALL THE SKILLS to be able to PERFORM all the aspects of the ‘pick up’ effectively.

What you will GET from the BOOTCAMP is
enough coaching and experience to be truly
INDEPENDENT so that you can then PERFECT
THE SKILLS on your own. 

Neither I, nor anyone else on earth, can PERFECT
your skills in just TWO DAYS, but what I can
do for you in just TWO DAYS is truly give you
enough skill to make you INDEPENDENT when
it comes to successfully approaching women, and
you can then continue to polish the SOLID
FOUNDATION you will get from bootcamp. 

BOOTCAMP will save you TIME, and I’m not just talking about days or weeks, it will save most men MONTHS and YEARS of their lives.

There are two reasons I will save you so much time:

The first reason is that I will DEMONSTRATE it all for you in front of your very own eyes. Seeing is

believing, and having that belief makes it a lot easier to DO all the required actions with CONVICTION and with CONFIDENCE.

The second reason is, even if you DO believe every word I say, even without the demonstrations, your execution of the various actions, the various strategies,may not be happening the way they should for maximum impact. 

Think of how a personal trainer knows exactly how
a squat should be performed, how a bench press
should be performed, how fast, how slow, how to
lower the weight, how to raise it properly, how long
to rest, etc. 

Similarly, I will MONITOR your approaches, and I can IMMEDIATELY detect where you may be going off track and I can prevent bad habits from forming, so that you do things EXACTLY right.

And I’m not a jerk in the way I teach.
I will find out the style of learning that works best for you
and that you are comfortable with

I do ask one thing though- that you only come
to bootcamp if you are PREPARED to push
yourself.

Time is precious.  Only come to bootcamp if
you are ready to push beyond your comfort zone.

This experience will be exhilarating, it will change
your life, but it is not a walk in the park for everyone.

Most men, even if they HEAR about this thing
called the pick-up arts, will NOT do anything
that requires REAL WORK to actually GET results.

It’s too easy to give into all the excuses out there.
And then they will say some dude got “lucky” to
get the kind of woman that the dude is with.

Some guys ARE lucky with women, but relying
on luck is not a strategy for winners.

If you only get a woman through luck, what happens if it doesn’t work out? How will you meet another woman- the kind of woman that you WANT?

There is only one way: Through LEARNING THESE SKILLS that I can teach you in person, in a way that ensures the FASTEST learning possible.

I will show you EVERYTHING, including the nuances,
and I will CORRECT any mistakes that you are making -
I will ensure you will GAIN the ability to successfully
approach and attract women.

Bootcamp is at:


There is ANOTHER important reason to LEARN these skills: 

Almost EVERY guy I meet has this one woman
that is NOT giving him the kind of treatment he is
looking for, and the one thing in common with all
men in this situation is that their minds are playing
tricks on them- they THINK that a particular woman
is somehow WORTH it, even though when looking at
it from a logical perspective, there is NO RATIONAL
reason to be investing so much emotional energy into
a woman that is giving a man basically nothing.

This all CEASES the very INSTANT that men suddenly get POWERFUL OPTIONS with MANY OTHER WOMEN.

And that is what this is about.

We are currently living in a time where men are NOT in a natural position when it comes to women- things are UPSIDE DOWN in fact.  

Women have virtual HAREMS of men at their disposal,
willing to do ANYTHING for these women.

And most men can’t even get ONE woman they like
no matter WHO they are- and who can blame men
in a society where men are afraid of being accused
of sexual harassment for even LOOKING at a woman?

Let me CHANGE ALL THAT FOR YOU.
Let me give you the power of choice when it comes to women.

Bootcamp is at:


Till next time,

Michael Marks

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