One of the big things in making an approach
WORK when you are trying to attract a woman
is to switch the vibe of the interaction
from PROPER SOCIAL CONVENTION to a more
FLIRTY, playful, naughty, and sexual vibe.
Now, don't get me wrong- the FIRST skill
is to simply learn how to approach in a smooth
way, where the very act of STARTING the
conversation with a woman who is a total
stranger, does not seem weird.
I have written several posts about that
topic but today I want to focus on
CREATING THE VIBE.
Formal, proper, official social convention
is not a bad thing- for when you are just
going about your everyday business, but
when you are trying to attract a woman
you have to help her get OUT of that
formal, official, non-sexual, non-flirty
state of mind, or it's too easy for her
to simply not even SEE you in the context
of being a man she is sexually interested in.
One of the BEST ways to accomplish the
transition from formal to sexual is to
FIRST go into playful in a very specific
way-the way of displaying more PRIMAL
behavior but in a measured, playful way.
To be more specific, I'm talking about
displaying more SELFISH behavior, ironically,
but again, in a playful way.
The reason this works, is because sex is
actually not all about politeness, it is
about MUTUAL PLEASURE, and it is about
having fun, and taking, and it is primal,
carnal, and selfish to an extent.
This applies to both men and women.
It's not a polite thing, it's a PRIMAL thing.
So, it HELPS a woman enter that state of
mind if YOU lead the way first. If YOU
show some more indulgence in FUN and in
breaking social convention, and in doing
what you WANT, it helps HER feel comfortable
about letting her guard down as well.
So, for example, let's say you are texting
a woman, and she is in a library, and she
texts you back saying she is going to call
you in ten minutes because she doesn't want
to disturb others in the library, you
might playfully write back that being banned
from the library is a small price to pay
for the pleasure of being with you.
She will know you're joking, but at the same
time you are displaying SELFISH behavior,
you are clearly putting your needs first,
all of which shows you are 'a male animal'
plus you are being sexual, and you are showing
confidence, which helps make her feel comfortable
being a female sexual animal.
I'm one of the most polite people on the planet,
and I also understand that there is a time for
it and a time to put it away or to temper it,
when you are trying to transition things to
a more sexual level with a woman.
The sex drive is not a modern development,
it is the oldest part of our brains, it is
PRIMAL. It is not triggered by appealing to
logic and the more modern developments of
the brain.
It is triggered by appealing the OLDEST
and most PRIMITIVE part of the mind.
So in one move, you are doing all the right
things- and you are helping her to feel more
comfortable abandoning social convention rules
to be all prim and proper and to indulge in
some selfish pleasure.
This is part of the reason "bad boys"
do well with women- it's because women
are brought up with competing ideologies,
on one hand, they watch Disney movies where
they are all innocent, and on the other hand
they have all the same primal drives that men
do (albeit in a different manifestation but
with equal intensity to men's drives) and
bad boys help women feel free to be as
'bad' as they want in a sexual way.
Of course, there is nothing 'bad' about
the sex drive anyway, but because of social
conditioning, there will always be this
benefit to those men who understand how to
pour on a little bad-boy behavior into their
communication. There is no need to go overboard
and be a jerk or get arrested.
The trick to doing all this correctly is
to calibrate properly. Go too far, and you
will freak her out, do too little and you
don't make an impact. A good rule of thumb
is push the envelope just a bit.
And also, remember that this is not just about
being selfish, it's also about pouring on the
PARTY vibe- the emotional state that is all about
having fun, letting go, and not thinking too much.
This used to be the hardest thing for me to do,
to let go of thinking and just have fun, and to
just enjoy the moment- the irony is that attracting
women has to do with actually LETING GO of so many
things that stop us, as opposed to having to learn
SPECIAL TACTICS.
In other words, we are already equipped with the
know-how on how to approach women and attract
women, we've just repressed these instincts through
social conditioning.
If you want to learn the skills of how to approach
women anywhere and how to attract them, I seriously
suggest you take my live bootcamp program because
in bootcamp, you will SEE exactly what it all looks
like, sounds like, feels like, IN PERSON.
The benefit of bootcamp with me is that I have spent
over ten years learning how to CALIBRATE the various
elements of a successful interaction, and I can SHOW
you this by demonstration on real women, and plus
my experience will also allow me to remove any
issues in your approaches since I will see exactly
where you may be going off track and I can teach
you exactly what to do to fix the issue.
Learning these skills is like learning how to drive.
There are MANY aspects to a successful interaction,
just like there are many aspects to driving.
When you first learn to drive, it all seems overwhelming-
checking surounding traffic, the guages, your mirrors,
how much pressure to apply to the accelerator and the
brake, how to park, etc., but then after a while, it
all seems instinctive.
It's similar with attracting and approaching women.
You have to know how to guage the situation, how
much dominance, humor, sexuality, rapport, etc,
to pour on, and when to ease up. You have to
develop the ability to react quickly, because
so often when approaching a woman who is a
stranger, you only get one chance to do it right,
and so when a challenge in the conversation comes
up, you need to solve it immediately.
I can teach you these skills, and how to get great
at these skills.
And make no mistake about it- without learning
these skills, you are at a SERIOUS disadvantage
when it comes to meeting and attracting women-
you are forced to rely on OTHER people to hopefully
introduce you to some women, which almost NEVER
works out, or you are forced to rely on online dating,
which has really become worse than it used to be,
and where all you have to represent yourself is
an online profile instead of your REAL, live, self.
These days, if you are a man, you MUST learn
these skills to have a real sense of CHOICE
when it comes to women.
With these skills, you can meet and attract
more women in one day than most men
will attract in their entire LIVES. This might
sound crazy, but it is the absolute truth,
and it's one of those things that you want
to learn as EARLY in your life as you can.
Personally, I wish I had learned these skills
when I was in high school, but I sure am glad that
I learned them, and it's NEVER TOO LATE to
learn these skills, it's just better to learn them
as soon as possible.
My bootcamp program is at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/bootcamp-sign-up.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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