Two VITAL Keys To Approaching Women

I’m going to share with you two of the

absolute most important PRACTICAL

tips on how to actually approach women.

The reason I’ve spent so much time in

previous newsletters discussing the issue

of finding the kind of women who are

honest, respectful, faithful, not promiscuous,

etc., is because in reality THAT is the

harder part, the part that takes more

persistence and effort.

However, I also realize that unless you know

HOW to meet women in the first place, none

of that will make any difference, since you

have to have the women in the first place

in order to choose from them.

So here we go:

NEVER QUALIFY YOURSELF

What this means is when you approach a

woman, don’t try to EXPLAIN yourself,

and don’t try to “prop yourself up” by

alluding to or referring to REASONS

why she should talk to you.

I’ll give some specific examples:

Let’s say you are not wearing your favorite

shirt, coat, jacket, boots, or whatever it is

that you think gives you “good luck” or or

somehow improves your chances with women.

Let’s say you are coming home from work and

you think your hair is not perfect, or that there

may be a stain on your coat, or maybe there in

fact is a stain, etc.

Or let’s say you are feeling tired, and you think

you look terrible because of it. Or you are rough

shaven since you didn’t have time to shave, and

you think you might look homeless.

In all the above cases, you may feel a NEED

to EXPLAIN yourself, so that the woman

should give you a CHANCE.

You may feel you need to say something like

“I don’t normally look like this”, or “This

drink spilled on me earlier”, or “Please excuse

the way I look, I haven’t had a chance to sleep

because I was working through the night”etc,

etc, etc.

 

ALL THAT STUFF IS QUALIFYING YOURSELF.

And it NEVER helps, and in fact often ends up

RUINING the whole thing when in fact there would

have been NO PROBLEM had you just not  gone

into the whole QUALIFYING yourself.

The reason QUALIFYING is so destructive is that

it REEKS of NOT BEING SURE OF YOUR VALUE.

Have you ever heard of the term “social proof”?

It means the fact that human beings are affected

by the perceptions of others regarding just about

anything.  So if a person finds out that millions

of people like some product, or some person, or

some service, there is a big chance that now that

person will IMMEDIATELY think “Well that

thing, person, or service MUST be great!”.

But guess what?

THE NUMBER ONE SOCIAL PROOF YOU

HAVE IS THE “PROOF” THAT YOU PROVIDE

ABOUT YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So if YOU seem to think that there is

SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU JUST

APPROACHING HER AS YOU ARE WITHOUT

SOME QUALIFYING/JUSTIFICATION/EXPLANATION,

then YOU are exerting a NEGATIVE SOCIAL PROOF

on YOURSELF.

After all, she will INSTINCTIVELY think, if

YOU don’t think you are CLEARLY AND OBVIOUSLY

THE RIGHT PERSON TO BE TALKING TO HER,

then why should SHE think you are the right person?   

This all happens SUBCONSCIOUSLY.

Just like people react subconsciously to other

forms of social proof.          

By the way, the OTHER reason qualifying yourself

is so bad is that so often the whole problem is only

an issue in your OWN mind, but now that you have  

drawn ATTENTION to the damn stain, or not perfectly

brushed/combed hair, or that you didn’t get a perfect

8 hours of beauty sleep, well NOW you’ve put THAT

under the MAGNIFYING glass, so of course that is

now going to be the FOCUS and she will NOW possibly

actually start to think that maybe there IS an issue.

So instead of drawing attention AWAY from that

thing you were concerned about, you have actually

drawn attention TOWARD it in a MASSIVE way,

so massive in fact that it is a DISTORTED and

OVERLY NEGATIVE portrayal of yourself.

Plus, HERE’S the final kicker:

By NOT qualifying yourself, and just TOTALLY

being “THE MAN” in all senses of the word, not

only do you come across as far more confident,

masculine, and far more as a WINNER, but even

in the TINY chance that she somehow DOES notice

whatever it was you were concerned about, she might

actually end up interpreting it in a POSITIVE SENSE!

This is because, since you didn’t feel the need to

bring it up, and since you came across as so confident,

she will now subconsciously interpret EVERYTHING

about you in a way that is CONSISTENT to her impression

of you being AWESOME.

So if it’s a scar, she might figure you are the kind of

man that hasn’t been overly sheltered and that isn’t

too DELICATE.

If you hair is not perfect, she might figure you are

TOO BUSY getting things DONE to keep every last

hair perfectly coiffed. 

This can go on and on, the main point is that once

you deliver the impression that you don’t doubt

yourself, she will then instinctively give all the

REST of you the very BEST interpretation as well.

The NEXT thing I want to let you know about

is the whole SMILE thing.       

DON'T SMILE IN THE INITIAL APPROACH

Yes, you heard me correctly.

I suggest you DON’T SMILE when you approach women.

This flies in the fact of all the typical advice

that tells men to SMILE when they approach

women to somehow show they are not threatening

or happy or something.

But REAL WORLD TESTING has shown me

that smiling initially in the approach never HELPS,

and sometimes HURTS your chances.

In a nutshell, it’s NOT attractive on a man to

START with the whole smiling thing, PLUS

it tends to give off the impression that you are

some kind of CLOWN who spends his whole

day goofing around trying to meet women,

and who clearly doesn’t know much about women

or why is he goofing around so much since women

don’t like goofy behavior in men.

Of course, if you read feminist advice,

(which does NOT represent most women)

the general advice from them would be for

you to give her a three-hour dissertation

explaining why you are not a psycho who

is bent on raping her.

In fact, the whole QUALIFYING thing and the

whole SMILING thing probably stem from growing

up in a society where you are made to feel as if

TALKING to a woman who is a stranger is EVIL,

or as if all women were TERRIFIED of a man

talking to them, when in REALITY women,

especially attractive women, are SUPER CONFIDENT

and SUPER COMFORTABLE since they KNOW

they have the POWER over most men when it comes

to these dynamics- in other words, the woman knows

SHE is the desired party in this equation, from the

GET GO.

So, if you want SUCCESS when you approach

women, do NOT qualify yourself, and do NOT

start off with a smile, and in fact try not to smile

too much in the whole interaction.

Think about it, how much do you need to SMILE

when around friends that you are COMFORTABLE

with?  Sure you may smile when something funny

is happening, but do you go around forcing a big

smile? Of course not. Because you don’t feel a

need to treat your friends like they are fragile little

CHILDREN.

Well guess what? Women aren’t fragile little

children either, and in fact adult women actually

want their men to be MEN.  There’s a reason

Bond, Dirty Harry, and Han Solo aren’t particularly

SMILING around women, unlike most men who

are doing it out of APPROVAL SEEKING and

SUBMISSIVE behavior.

Do you want to know more?

Then here’s what I suggest:

Take a BOOTCAMP with me.

Why is BOOTCAMP so effective?

It’s because SEEING is BELIEVING.

And BELIEF is such a huge part of success.

If you don’t BELIEVE you can do something,

if you believe that the whole thing is just not in

your reality, it can be pretty hard to pull it off.

In BOOTCAMP, you will see results right before

your EYES, all happening in real time. First, you

will see demonstrations of approaches on real women,

and then you will perform the approach yourself, and

you will SEE the results for yourself.

SEEING the results makes it easier for you to

INTERNALIZE your new beliefs, and then take

them with you forever for all the women you 

will ever encounter for the future.

I  have been doing this for over TWELVE YEARS.

I know my stuff inside out.

To learn more about bootcamp, you can email me

or go HERE:

http://getagreatgirl.com/bootcamp-sign-up.html

If you have a serious question about any matter related

to attracting women, dating, or relationships, then you can

arrange a private consultation with me by going here:

http://getagreatgirl.com/PrivateCoaching.html

I also SERIOUSLY suggest you get my

ATTRACTION MASTERY PROGRAM

that gives you the ADVANCED insights

on approaching and attracting women

ANYWHERE. 

One of the great advantages of this program

is that it is a professionally recorded audio

program, which means you can also listen to

it while doing something like driving or when

working out. So as you get to your destination,

or finish a workout, or get other chores done,

you are also enhancing your mastery when it

comes to attracting women. 

Think of this program as your REFERENCE

resource on all aspects of attracting women.

It’s at:

http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html

Till next time,

Michael Marks

Do Nice Guys REALLY Finish Last With Women?

Do nice guys REALLY finish last with women?
You are about to get the SOLID EVIDENCE to
answer this question once and for all!

Since day one, the biggest thing to me has
been to stay AWAY from all gimmicks.

In fact, if you read my very first book,
The Dating Wizard, which was published
in 2003, you can see that I was against the
use of all sorts of gimmicks back then, and
that this book teaches how you can truly
BECOME the man that women want instead
of how to put on an "act".

One of the biggest things I have been teaching
throughout the years are things that fly in the
face of "accepted practice", and that is because
"accepted practices" such as smiling at women
and showing them how NICE I could be got me
NOWHERE with women.

On the other hand, as I started to become far
LESS NICE, and did a LOT LESS SMILING, I
noticed way, way, WAYYYYYYYYYYYYY
better results.

This used to drive me nuts, and I could not figure
it out, as I used to think women loved MEAN men.

Then, I finally realized that it was all about a
tiny SUBTLETY; it was about the SUBTLE
messages being given off by all that smiling
and niceness.

The message was:
"I HAVE LOW  VALUE AND STATUS AND WILL
KISS YOUR BUTT JUST FOR THE CHANCE
TO BE WITH YOU."

And women, across ALL cultures and geographic
regions of the PLANET, are not attracted to men
who behave with LOW confidence, men who
behave as if they have no POWER.

In other words, men with no PRIDE.
So, you COULD smile at a woman, but the fact
is, the way MOST men smile at women who
are hot is a SUBMISSIVE smile.

It is not the kind of smile that says YOU want ME.
It is a smile that says the following:

"I want YOU but I don't have the value to be
WORTHY of you. Therefore, I am going to SHOW
you through this smile how much I will SERVE
you, be submissive to you, and do whatever
you want, because I feel that is a fair deal
since YOU have the value and I don't'."

And, ultimately, a woman feels far more DESIRABLE
when the desire is coming from a man who KNOWS
he is wanted and who ALSO wants HER.

After all, if a man feels he has no value, then his
desire for her is NOT as flattering as it would be
if he KNEW and FELT and BEHAVED like he
was the ULTIMATE man.

Yes, women DO want to be lusted after, but it has
to be by a man who isn't behaving as if HE has
no worth.

So, for example, you could even TELL a woman
a compliment IF that compliment is delivered
in a way that shows you BELIEVE she will be
FLATTERED by it, rather than if you believe
you NEED to do those kinds of things to
get her to "agree" to be with you.

And I received an email from a cool guy
with yet even MORE RESEARCH that PROVES
every thing I have been saying.

In fact, not only is PRIDE and CONFIDENCE something
that is viewed as making men MORE attractive, but
it makes women seem LESS attractive, and in fact
when women behave in a somewhat FRIENDLIER
and even slightly SUBMISSIVE way, women are
viewed as MORE attractive.

This is UNIVERSAL across cultures.
So much for what SOME feminists say, i.e. that
"it is just a matter of "culture" and environment that
makes men prefer women who DO smile, who DO
behave friendly."

Men do NOT get turned on by the same behaviors
in women as women get turned on by in MEN.

Men should exhibit PROUD expressions and
women should exhibit FRIENDLY expressions
IF they want to be at their "sexiest".

Here are some quotes from a recent study by
Jessica L. Tracy and Alec T. Beall from the
University of British Columbia concerning
"The Impact of Emotion Expressions on Sexual
Attraction."

"Across two studies using different images
and samples ranging broadly in age (total N _ 1041),
a large gender difference emerged in the sexual
attractiveness of happy displays: happiness was
the most attractive female emotion expression,
and one of the least attractive in males.

In contrast, pride showed the reverse pattern;
it was the most attractive male expression, and
one of the least attractive in women."

The study also goes on to say that while smiling
may be SOCIALLY the right thing to do for
both men and women, it HARMS the initial
attractiveness of men to women, but it INCREASES
the attractiveness of women.

This is why for MEN, not exactly trying to "fit in"
is often PART of what makes a man attractive, even
though it costs him some social points with the
rest of society.

So now you can understand why so many women
LOVE "bad boys" but why most men don't find
"bad girls" to be sexy.

But you do not HAVE to be a "bad boy", you just
have to behave with DOMINANCE.

Going too far with being a "bad boy" will
DESTROY your relationships. Ultimately,
if your behavior makes her feel WORSE
rather than better, then you're going
too far.

And if you haven't yet downloaded my program
"Attraction Accelerators" then definitely do
that NOW.

This program shows you strategies you can
put into use IMMEDIATELY to start attracting
women TODAY.

And of course, you will find this program
is BURSTING WITH TONS OF NEW material that
is not in any of my other programs.  I make
sure that ALL my programs are this way,
they all give you IMPORTANT NEW MATERIAL
for giving you MAXIMUM SUCCESS with women. 

I know you are going to absolutely LOVE this
program.

It's also an INSANE price, seriously.
It is only $19.97 and you can download it
IMMEDIATELY and be using it on women today.

It's at:

http://getagreatgirl.com/attraction-accelerators.html

Till next time,

Michael Marks                

Should You Smile When You Approach Women?

One of the biggest things when it comes
to approaching women and SUCCEEDING at it,
is something that is incredibly simple:

It has a lot to do with your smile, or rather,
the LACK of it.

This is something that can destroy your chances
before you even get out of the gate, because it
shows before you even say a word, so it’s important
to get this right.

This topic is one of those subtle yet vital
areas that can only come from REAL experience
approaching women in public.  Before you can
even GET into attraction, you have to make
sure the woman is not FREAKED OUT with fear
or somehow thinking that there is something
"sketchy" going on.

Imagine approaching a woman at night on the
sidewalk when no one is around, and how
going in with an immediate "PICK UP" vibe
will just trigger all her "BEWARE OF DANGER"
ALARMS.
 
Now, what I’m about to explain is referring to
situations that are NOT a “party” or a dance club 
situation, or anything like that, where the mood
is ALREADY all “party and happy times” etc.

In other words, I’m speaking about 99% of
real life situations where you see a woman 
who is a total stranger.

The truth is, that most guys will be better off
NOT smiling when they start the conversation.

Keep this in mind, next time you’re about to
chat to a woman you want to meet who is
a total stranger.

The problem with smiling is NOT that you are
in a good mood, the problem is that:

1. Usually the smile is actually showing that you
feel she has higher worth than you do.  So it’s
a form of submission.

2. Also, the reality is that most women are conditioned
to NOT talk to strangers in non “socially-endorsed”
environments. 

In other words, if it’s not a club, or a party,
or some other situations where you are
both somehow all part of some “group”, it’s
quite typical for a lot of women to feel that
it’s not “normal”.

And the more the environment is NOT considered
"normal" for approaching women, the MORE
important it is to do the approach RIGHT,
with PROPER technique.

So when you are SMILING on top of all this, it
REALLY seems like it’s “not normal.”

After all, WHY are you smiling at her?

It must be because you LIKE her, right?

And so now you are trying to basically get
into FLIRT mode in a NON-SOCIAL environment.

So the gate comes SLAMMING DOWN on
the potential pickup.

SLAM! THE DOOR OF OPPORTUNITY SHUT.

You can’t get into FLIRT mode before FIRST
establishing that in fact you ARE an “exception”
to the societal rule of, “Don’t get social in 
non-social environments!”

Now, we can argue till the cows come home
that these societal “rules” are stupid, but in
the meantime, if you IGNORE these rules,
you end up having to only go for the extremely
wild  women who, on one hand may be cool in
the sense they don’t follow a lot of social rules,
but they usually ALSO tend to be DRAMA cases
without end. It’s all part of the chaos
that they love.

So, if you are trying to actually increase your
chances when it comes to meeting women,
start your interaction without smiling, and
in fact whatever you do talk about, start by
speaking about whatever it is that you decided
to speak about, with total CONVICTION, don’t
turn it into a big joke- not in the first SECOND.

Treat it all very MATTER OF FACT, make
the conversation very very NOT “PICK UPPY”.

This is the best way to actually get INTO a
conversation where she is genuinely LISTENING. 

Otherwise, you will often get shut down in
her mind (i.e. even if she is letting you talk to her,
she’s may just be being polite and waiting for the
moment to say: “Thanks and goodbye.”)

Now, ONCE she is ENGAGED in the conversation,
THEN, it’s a GREAT idea if you can UNLEASH
HUMOR.

THEN, it’s NO PROBLEM if you smile some,
IF that smile is coming from a place of
confidence and not from feeling “MAN,
THIS IS AMAZING, I CAN’T BELIEVE IT!”

If it’s such a big deal to you, then that would
be a sign of LACK of confidence, right?

At this point, I’d like to take this entire newsletter
here to a HIGHER level.

The MORE important thing than asking whether
to smile or not, to compliment or not, to do anything
or not with a woman, is the EMOTIONS behind your
actions.

The question to ask yourself is:
“Which EMOTION triggered my action?”

If it was a WEAK emotion, then it’s the
WRONG action.

But since most people find it EXTREMELY
HARD to change their emotions, and to
be coming from the right emotional place,
so it seems “easier” to just adopt the superficial
things, i.e. the most RECOGNIZABLE
EXPRESSIONS OF CONFIDENCE.

By doing this, you are more likely to be giving
off the right messages from your body language,
facial expression, etc.

But it’s really a band-aid solution.
You want the DEEPER stuff, because it will
give you even better results, and it’s also the
only way to actually KEEP a woman attracted.

If you’re just an act, it will be a short-lived attraction.

So let’s take a LOOK at the EMOTIONS
behind the right expressions on your face, the
emotions that are really behind the right body
language, etc.

Here are some of the emotions that should be present:
*Absolute CONFIDENCE that you have tons of value.
*The feeling of truly not NEEDING her.
*Feeling very COMFORTABLE chatting to her.
*Feeling DOMINANT.

Now, if you are really FEELING those things,
why on earth WOULD you be smiling?

After all, you don’t even KNOW her.
Why are you so KEEN on flirting with this
TOTAL STRANGER? 

It’s not even a party going on.

Now, unless YOU just won the lottery or
something, and you’re doing this with
everyone, it just doesn’t really make sense.
 
Once she is truly engaged in the conversation with
you, well now you are SOCIALIZING, and so it
makes SENSE to enjoy the social interaction if
at all possible.  So NOW it makes sense to unleash
the humor skills, to smile if something funny is
said, or if she does something good to you, or
something to earn your interest or attention.

And, on an even DEEPER level, as you get
to know her even BETTER, and as you go
onto the first date, and the second, and ultimately
into a relationship, there will be ALL KINDS
OF ACTIONS that you will have to make
decisions on- when to kiss her, when to escalate
physically, when to be more giving, when to
stand up and if required put her in her place,
when to truly lower your guard, when to
go ALL OUT and truly give her your precious
time and energy. 

And that’s just a partial list of actions and
decisions you’ll have to make.

In the meantime, if you do absolutely
NOTHING ELSE, then at least remember
to NOT smile in the BEGINNING of the
interaction, as long as you're not
in a club type "party" situation
or a situation where you're all
part of some group already.
(i.e. For example, even if you
are all students at the same
university, this in itself is
enough to make you part of
a group).  

And if you're reading this right now,
and would like to become a MASTER when
it comes to the dating and relationships
part of your life, I suggest you get my
program called WARRIOR WITHIN.

This program goes DEEP, and is ROCKET FUEL
for your success with women.

It's at:

http://getagreatgirl.com/warrior.html

And if you haven't yet downloaded my book,
"The Dating Wizard", then definitely do that
now at:

http://getagreatgirl.com/Wizard.html

Till next time,

Michael Marks

To find out about ALL my programs for
skyrocketing your success with women,
go here:

http://getagreatgirl.com