newsletter, and that is because QUALITY
counts more than anything else to me, and
I recently finished a period where I spent
several weeks IMMERSED exclusively in
“the field”- that is, in the actual approaches
and attraction work where I and my clients
approach women just about EVERYWHERE
and ANYWHERE.
More on that later, in fact, there's a
very important announcement at the end
of this newsletter regarding all this
research I've been doing "in the field".
In fact, I am so obsessed with this work,
that even after “bootcamps” are over and
my clients go home after an intensive day
of approaching and attracting women, I
typically don’t end the day then, as what
I do at that point is POUR over everything
that happened during the bootcamp and
analyze everything to glean new important
insights and strategies for FURTHER improving
the process of attracting women anywhere.
So, what you are about to read comes DIRECTLY
from all this experience. There is absolutely
no filler, no gimmicks, no nonsense, no
new age hocus-pocus, just CONCRETE,
SOLID, PROVEN STRATEGIES THAT WORK.
So here we go:
NUMBER ONE:
WOMEN CRAVE AUTHENTICITY, AND YOU CAN’T
BE AUTHENTIC IF YOU GO INTO THE APPROACH
WITH A PLAN.
Now, this might sound hard to believe, especially
if you already know that indeed just about all
successful approaches go through stages in the
interaction, from opening the conversation to
building attraction and rapport, to closing the
interaction with a solid close where it’s clear
she is into you and where she wants you to
take her number, or even immediately go
out on an “instant-date” right then and there.
The thing is, though, that even though these
“phases” of the interaction may very well
exist, they are simply the NATURAL by-product
of ALL effective interactions that you will have
with the women you want to attract.
And one of the KEY elements to having an effective
conversation when you approach a woman who is
a total stranger is for you to come across as
AUTHENTIC, and not as some guy who has this
predetermined exact concept of what you and her
should say and do.
A woman can TELL when a guy is not being authentic,
and is on some form of auto-pilot, and it weirds a
woman out, it makes her go on “caution” mode, since she
is wondering why can’t the guy just be more “for real”
instead of putting on an act.
Of course, the CHALLENGE then becomes the following:
“How do I go in there without a plan, and stay
CALM? After all, I have no idea what to SAY
to her!!!!!!!!!!”
And this is where you can really separate
the guys who care about teaching this stuff
for REAL, versus the guys who are only in
this for the commercial reasons of making
money.
Do I expect to be paid for my intense work and
long hours devoted to a client? Yes, because
time is not free. However, the difference with
me is that I REALLY AM PASSIONATE ABOUT
THIS FIELD FOR REAL.
And I’m not talking about going to nightclubs
where certain types of women attend, and where
these women are tipsy, half-drunk, or bombed
out of their minds.
That, to me, is not really what it’s all about.
To me, it’s all about actually meeting the kind
of women who have TRUE potential to be great
girlfriends, the kinds of women that most
men REALLY want. Ultimately, the kind of
WOMAN you really want for the LONG term.
And you just can’t find those women in a bar
or nightclub, at least not the vast majority of
the time.
So, what do you do to BE authentic and NOT
memorize material and NOT go in with some
pre-determined plan, and yet STILL be calm
and under control?
Well, this gets to step number TWO:
NUMBER TWO:
PUT ALL YOUR NERVOUS ENERGY INTO
ONE THING- FOCUSING ON HER.
See, the REAL trick to this, is that you don’t
HAVE to memorize or plan ANYTHING, you
can start a conversation with the SIMPLEST
remark or observation that you notice, and
then ALL YOUR FOCUS IS OFF YOU COMPLETELY,
it should ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
go into LISTENING to her, and OBSERVING her,
and REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLY
paying attention.
This is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO good, for so
many reasons, and it really is so friggen insane
how the so called “pick up artists” will sell guys
so much B.S. and nonsense, and miss out on the
BIGGEST thing, which is this.
First of all, by focusing on LISTENING to her and
observing her, rather than on thinking to yourself
“WHAT DO I SAY TO HER?” you go into a much
CALMER state, since there is just about NOTHING
that you have to “figure out” in terms of what
to say or do!
You just LISTEN, OBSERVE, PERCEIVE, PAY ATTENTION, to all that she says or does.
So start the conversation with SOME observation:
It could be the oranges she’s looking at in the
supermarket, and you notice she is really taking
her time to get the right ones and you could say
the first thought in your mind from this e.g.
“You’re really picky, aren’t you?”
Is this a REALLY GENIUS HARD COMMENT to think of
when you see her selecting the oranges? No, it’s not.
The KEY is to OBSERVE her response- let your eyes,
ears, intelligence, and HEART be OPEN so you can
get ALL the things she is saying/implying with her
words, body language, clothing style, etc.
So, she might chuckle first, to which YOU can say:
“You’re laughing. You think I’m funny. You were
here to get oranges and now you’re getting more
than just oranges.”
Or, she might chuckle and say to you:
“You have to be careful, not all oranges are
equal!” as a joke back to you.
If you’re paying attention to HER, then when
she says to you her comment that not all oranges
are equal, this could trigger in your mind the
thought or image of oranges not all mixing together
properly, or even the thought that oranges
themselves can’t be mixed with oranges, never
mind APPLES and ORANGES!
So you can respond to her with:
“Oh man, now you’re getting really mean!
First they say, not to mix apples and oranges,
but now according to YOU, you can’t even
mix APPLES AND APPLES! That’s it, we’re
done! I want a divorce!”
THIS IS FUNNY, and it shows you DID NOT
REHEARSE IT OR PLAN IT.
So she does not go into: “This sucks, this guy
doesn’t even pay attention to me, he just says
the same pick up lines to every woman he meets!”
Instead, you were AUTHENTIC and truly in the
MOMENT and just GENUINELY and AUTHENTICALLY
REACTING to what she was doing and saying.
Now, I need to add one more important detail
here, which is the following:
NUMBER THREE:
YOU CAN DO ALMOST ANYTHING, BUT YOU MUST
HAVE SOME KIND OF POSITIVE EMOTION GOING
INTO THE APPROACH.
So, you can be intriguing, you can be motivating,
you can be funny, you can of course be FLIRTY,
(you don’t HAVE to start with flirty), but you
DO have to SOME kind of COMPELLING ANGLE,
which flows from your state of mind.
Whatever emotion you are feeling, you will FILTER
the world through that emotion, so if you are totally
in ZOMBIE mode, or totally bored, or totally exhausted,
you just won’t SEE much in any situation where you
find a woman, and no matter WHAT she says to you.
So you have TONS of choices of what emotions
you can be experiencing, you don’t have to be
x if you are y, you don’t have to change yourself
into being into country music if you are into rock,
or rock if you are into country, you don’t have
to be funny, you don’t have to be mysterious
or intriguing, but you have to be feeling SOMETHING
positive, even if it’s just a love for life, or if it’s
a great song you just heard, or even if you are
just feeling flirty and in a good mood.
You can’t walk in there on a fuel tank that is,
from a positive emotional standpoint, empty.
But that’s it, once you have THAT, almost ALL
your energy goes into OBSERVING AND LISTENING,
and then based on THAT, you just REACT in the
most instinctive way!!!!
So, if a woman tells you she just had a terrible
day at work, you can EASILY go into rapport
with her and make her feel you identify with
her, or you can cheer her up, or you can even
be funny and say “Hey, don’t tell me all your
problems, that’s RUDE!” in a JOKING way,
where she WILL laugh and hence you HAVE
cheered her up.
You see? Because you are GENUINELY listening,
what you SAY and DO can be a trillion percent
AUTHENTIC since all you have to do is REACT
sincerely (which could sometimes include
reacting with a JOKE) rather than make up
stuff!
So, by adopting this approach, you end up
coming across as AUTHENTIC, you don’t
sound off her mental alarm bells, you also
come across as socially intelligent since you
didn’t act selfish by talking only about yourself
but rather you got HER TALKING about herself
and you listened well, which in itself builds
a stronger bond, plus all this shows tons of
guts too, since, after all, you DID approach
her out of the blue and you smoothly got
a beautiful stranger to open up to you.
I love this stuff so much.
And guess what?
I've got MORE for you.
NUMBER FOUR:
TELLING A WOMAN YOU FIND HER ATTRACTIVE
So, you know how in general, putting a
woman on a PEDESTAL is a TERRIBLE
way to try to attract her?
Well guess what? I figured out a way to
actually tell a woman she is beautiful and
have it ONLY do GOOD things for you,
WITHOUT you coming across as a weak
man who will sell his soul for any crumbs
of attention from a beautiful woman.
It all has to do with the INTENT.
You see, getting back to point number
ONE regarding AUTHENTICITY, you
CAN tell a woman that she is beautiful,
because you MEAN it, and it IS the reason
you approached her, but the mistake that
just about EVERY GUY makes is that they
ALSO bring something ELSE into the
situation when they say something like
“You are so beautiful that I had to come
over and say hello.”
The MISTAKE is bringing into the situation
all your thoughts about the future, and how
you would do ANYTHING to be with her, and
how you would REALLY appreciate it, if she was
with you, etc, etc.
I’m talking about even THINKING those thoughts,
because the thoughts affect your emotions.
Now the TRICK to not thinking needy thoughts
is to simply be FULLY AUTHENTIC, which means
NOT romanticizing the moment with endless
thoughts of the FUTURE, and instead just
focus on the PRESENT.
In other words, she is BEAUTIFUL and you
FIND HER ATTRACTIVE.
That’s it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And THAT is OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don’t just mean morally okay, which OF
COURSE it is, what I mean is THAT will
NOT make you seem weak to a woman,
in fact, it can make you seem STRONG,
since you TOOK ACTION on your DESIRE,
and you have no apology for it.
That is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
different than the way most guys would
say the “beautiful” comment.
Also, one of the reasons I usually DON’T
suggest guys approach women with the
“you are so beautiful” comment is because
I myself used to be BRAINWASHED to believe
that women REALLY appreciated it when a
a man found her beautiful, and when a man
in general found her to be more beautiful
than any other woman, etc.
I used to really believe that the biggest thing
in a relationship for a woman is having a man
that never takes her for granted, that always
finds her so beautiful, etc, etc.
Of course, we are fed this B.S. from the day
we are born, so it’s no wonder so many men
think this, follow this, and then end up having
their hearts torn to shreds.
So, I don’t want guys to make the mistake of
thinking the “beautiful” comment works because
of romantic reasons, and I don’t want guys to
think that their relationships depend on convincing
a woman how beautiful you find her to be,
as that will just make you come across as weak
on an inner level, and women just can’t feel
attraction to men who radiate weakness within.
So that’s why I’m being REALLY careful to be
CLEAR here- the reason the “you’re
so beautiful” comment works in an initial
approach is ONLY if it is done with the
implications given in your vocal tonality that
you are the kind of man who rises to the challenge,
you see a woman you find beautiful, you take
action.
And yes, of course, a woman also appreciates
the compliment, but it’s not the COMPLIMENT
so much as the fact that YOU are so secure
with yourself, with your value, with being
secure about your sexual value, that all
YOU care about is EXPRESSING IT.
The emphasis is on YOU expressing your interest,
in a non-needy way, through the “beautiful”
comment.
In fact, the MORE you are COOL with her
NOT reciprocating the same interest, the
BETTER you will do, which is just another
irony is a series of ironies about attraction.
The reason it works when you DON’T need
her to MELT for you when you say these
words to her, is that it shows her you are
STRONG, that you are not so obsessed
with her having to now say “I will marry you”
just because you said “You are beautiful”.
Also, another positive element about this
“beautiful” comment, of course, is that it
is AUTHENTIC, and it immediately establishes
that you are not there out of platonic interest,
but rather you ARE A MAN who finds her
to be AN ATTRACTIVE WOMAN.
So it sets the wheels in motion in her mind
immediately, and it sets them in the right
direction, rather than pretending you just
want to talk about the weather with her.
Now, of course, on the ULTIMATE level,
when you have mastered EVERYTHING,
you can IMPLY so much in the most subtle
nuances in your expression and tonality,
even if you did approach a woman and
you DID talk about only the weather.
And, of course, you can also start with
a neutral conversation, and THEN go
into FLIRTY mode, teasing her playfully,
etc.
But before the ultimate level, where you
can actually do anything, this can be a
great way to improve your results with
women.
There are many roads that lead to Rome,
so to speak, but the KEY is to be AUTHENTIC
and to LISTEN and OBSERVE so that you
can react in the most fitting and most effective
way possible, based on what she is saying
or doing.
There is also another pearl I want to leave
you with, regarding ALL your approaches,
and that is before going into any approach,
you FULLY COMMIT in your mind to doing
your BEST no matter what.
In order to do this, we must accept the possibility
of failure, which leads to number five...
NUMBER FIVE:
ACCEPTING THE POSSIBILITY OF FAILURE.
This is a very subtle, but SUPREMELY POWERFUL
distinction between those guys who do well
and those guys who don’t when it comes to
approaching and attracting women.
You see, if you can’t accept the possibility of
failure, then in your mind, you will NOT give
ALL of yourself into your approach, because
you are too AFFECTED by that thought- the
thought of failure.
It is ONLY when you are PREPARED TO
ACCEPT FAILURE, and you STILL feel that
indeed it is STILL WORTH IT, THAT SUCCESS
WITH THE WOMAN IS WORTH IT SO MUCH
THAT THE COST OF POSSIBLE FAILURE IS
NOT ENOUGH OF A DETERRENT.
You have to really WANT success with
women to the point that success means
MORE TO YOU, much, much, MUCH more,
than failure.
And if you are reading this right now
and you want to SKYROCKET your success
with women, I suggest you get your hands
on my BRAND-NEW program, featuring
ALL-NEW and previously CLASSIFIED
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It’s called INSTANT ATTRACTION, because
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hocus-pocus stuff, just HARD-HITTING
EFFECTIVE STRATEGIES THAT WORK TO
ATTRACT THE WOMEN YOU WANT.
This program is also INSTANTLY DOWNLOADABLE,
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The price is also INSANELY awesome at $19.97,
so go download this program and use it to get
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http://getagreatgirl.com/instant-attraction.html
The material in this program comes from
REAL LIFE EXPERIENCE. In fact, at first
I was reluctant to even give these
secrets away, as I worked damn hard
to figure them all out, but then I
realized that this will keep me even
more hungry to KEEP ON ADVANCING in
this field of attracting women, which
is my passion.
In case you may be wondering why I am
so confident that my materials, coaching,
and bootcamps are so effective, it is
because I get to see men getting results
with them in my actual bootcamps.
Here's another thing about me and my
programs: I don't spend my time on MARKETING,
I just focus on the actual ATTRACTION skills
and I obsess to improve the field ceaselessly.
It’s the reason that The Toronto Star chose me
from all the instructors on Earth as the best coach
for men who not only want to attract a gorgeous woman,
but a gorgeous woman who would also make for a great
relationship as well, in the Toronto Star’s “Get A
Relationship Challenge”.
It’s also the reason David D’Angelo, best selling
author, said, "One of Michael's passions is not
only just how to attract women but also how
to find a great woman who would make a
fantastic girlfriend, and also how to create
attraction in a way that creates and builds
trust, rather than create attraction in a way
that hurts trust which a lot of guys do."
It is this standard of excellence and passion behind
my work which will give YOU the success you desire
with women as well.
The best thing you can do right now is
download this important new program for
skyrocketing your success with women,
by going here IMMEDIATELY:
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Till next time,
Michael Marks
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