TONS of crucial insights on attracting and approaching
women to get to today, AND there’s an important brand
NEW video as well:
As you know, I’m not interested in gimmicks or
juvenile ‘pick up lines’ as a method for attracting
the women of your choices. That stuff doesn’t
interest me, and I have a feeling it doesn’t for
you either. I get the feeling we’re a more mature
crowd.
Well, on that note, today, there is a lot of really practical
and important information on successfully approaching
and attracting women that I want to share with you.
Keep in mind, that everything I share with you is not
something I made up, but rather is what I have found
to be true again and again and again “in the field” on
real women in just about every place you can imagine,
and that is proven repeatedly in my Real World
Bootcamps on a weekly basis.
1. TO SMILE OR NOT TO SMILE?
When I first started out, I used to wonder why the
hell whenever I would smile in making my approach
to women, I would do much worse than when I didn’t.
This got me pissed off, and made me really NOT
feeling like smiling at women at all. This led to
me being more brute and cold in my approaches,
which ironically, IMPROVED everything, but
made me even more upset, because I started to
think women were nuts.
This was not a healthy foundation for a long–term
relationship with any woman, which is why my
relationships tended to explode pretty fast.
Well, fast forward several years, and I realized what
was going on:
In places that are not designed for “picking up”, i.e.
in places that are NOT clubs, bars, lounges, etc,
women don’t EXPECT to be approached by men.
Sure, it happens sometimes, but it’s usually not done
right.
See, there’s something really important to understand:
Many women actually FANTASIZE about meeting
a man who is their “destiny” through a total CHANCE
encounter. It’s as if it was all designed by fate and the
universe, etc, etc.
Think about how so many of the romance novels
for women revolve around a woman meeting a
man who is "the stranger".
Also, many women, even if they are not fantasizing
about meeting “the one” this way, still find the idea
of being approached by a total STRANGER who they
don't know at all, in a “normal” place like a bookstore,
bus, café, etc, to be very attractive and sexual.
HOWEVER, the WORST thing a man can do,
is to RUIN the “chance” element of all this in
a woman’s mind by making it seem like he
does this “pick up stuff” all day long, on
MANY women.
This TOTALLY ROBS the event of all the romance,
and all the unique “specialness” of it, since after all,
the guy does this on LOTS of women, and she was
just number 1,542.
So, if a guy, let’s say in a bookstore, is all smiley,
and all too perfectly polished, and acting as if this
is a CLUB, or a singles bar, etc, it REEKS of
FAKENESS, ARTIFICIALNESS, AND has zero
feeling of serendipity- a word that women love
that means “chance”. Hence, the chick-flick
“Serendipity”.
So THIS is why it’s important that when approaching
women in “normal” places- places that aren’t DESIGNED
for socializing and meeting other singles, such as bookstores,
coffee shops, etc, you really want to be as SPONTANEOUS
as possible, or at the very least, to COME ACROSS as
spontaneous.
2. USE THE ENVIRONMENT
This is one of the reasons I like to really work the
IMMEDIATE ENVIRONMENT into the approach,
because it tailors it for that SPECIFIC place and time,
making it far less likely to appear that you use the same
thing on every woman you meet.
For example, if the phone at the store is ringing,
you might joke with the woman “Hey, it’s for you”,
and you might even do this with a mock-serious
face, and even REPEAT it, as if you are serious,
saying “No really, serious, it’s for you!”.
THIS way, the interaction has started off in a very
REAL sense, a very IMMEDIATE sense, that you
are in the MOMENT with her.
She might say back, playfully but half-seriously
as well, "I hope not" (she hopes the phone is not
for her.)
And you might reply with, "Yeah, it's crazy,
you want to come to the bookstore to get
away from it all, and they keep hounding
you!!"
This SPONTANEOUS DYNAMIC does something
wonderful:
It REMOVES the “Oh-oh, another cheesy guy
who spends his whole day picking up women
or trying to pick them up.”
If a guy does it to all women, then how special
can SHE feel she is to the guy? Worse yet, if the
guy does it all day, she feels “Is he LACKING
the ability to get women somehow? What’s
WRONG with the guy? What do I have to
be CAREFUL about here?”
So THIS is the concern, it’s NOT that women
are somehow attracted to guys who are ice-cold
and somehow hate it when a guy smiles.
It’s the PARTICULAR LOGISTICS of the dynamics
of approaching women in ‘normal’ places that were
not originally designed especially for men and women
meeting each other!
THIS is why having the full SKILLS and INSIGHTS
on approaching women in different types of places is
ESSENTIAL.
It’s not enough to JUST have the guts to approach,
although that is a GREAT start.
In a club, bar, or lounge atmosphere, you CAN start with
a more jovial and socializing type of “vibe” to your
demeanor and mannerisms- because EVERYONE is
ALREADY in that state of mind, that is the whole
behavioral CONTEXT of the location.
The music, the dancing, the drinks, the weekend, the
good times, the party, etc., is all PART of the club,
bar, lounge ATMOSPHERE.
This is why, you could even USE an obvious pick-up
line in a club, and get away with it, as long as it’s
OBVIOUSLY SAID WITH PLAYFUL VIBES
and is just a start into more conversation.
But in regular places, I would prefer to comment
on something in the environment, or something she
is doing or wearing, or even start a conversation
by mentioning a true, intriguing story or article
that I had read to get her thoughts on it, and this
would be the springboard for a great conversation-
which I could still branch out from in many ways
if those branches seemed more meaningful.
3. USE THE PAUSE!
Another strategy to keep in mind, is that to prevent
yourself from “over-selling” yourself by talking too
much or too fast, you should REMEMBER to PAUSE.
Many times, when a guy is approaching a woman, he
will either say NOTHING, or he will keep on talking
TOO MUCH, including if the woman is responding
to him, he may get too excited and start trying so hard
that he keeps on talking and talking.
All this ends up coming across as if a guy is trying
too hard to QUALIFY himself. It comes across as
insecurity, which often leads to negative behaviors
like extreme arrogance, showing off, and not listening,
all of which are attraction destroyers.
So, by consciously reminding yourself to take PAUSES,
until it becomes instinct because you actually don’t FEEL
the need to oversell yourself, you prevent the problem.
You also allow HER to fill in the void, and allow HER
to speak, which also allows you to learn more about
her and makes you able to form a better connection
and have more MEANINGFUL things to say to her
that are RELEVANT to her, than simply talking
non-stop without listening to her.
This also makes you come across as more secure as well.
4. RE-ENGAGE IF REQUIRED
What I mean by this, is sometimes a woman
might not "IGNITE" the first second you
say something to her. She might have
had a bad day, she might have broken
up with her boyfriend, she might have
just been fired.
It could be a million things- so what
you have to do is ALLOW for all this,
and not EJECT so quickly.
Just because she didn't do cartwheels
the first second you started talking
to her does not mean it's over.
You may have to RE-ENGAGE her and
CONTINUE the conversation, with
something ELSE that is interesting,
relevant, playful, or captivating
in some other way.
Being a man means not running for the hills
just because she isn't offering you her
body and soul within two seconds of talking
to her.
5. NEW LIGHT ON THE QUESTION:
“DO JERKS REALLY ATTRACT WOMEN?”
This is a topic that has been spoken about a BILLION
times, so I’m not going to repeat what has already been
said on it – there is something very important and very
NEW that has not been said about this by anyone.
You must read the entire following section to truly
UNDERSTAND, so do NOT just read the next
paragraph, you must read the whole thing below
it as well, or you are going to start thinking some
terrible things about women – and I’m telling you
that with most women, those negative things are
NOT true.
INDEED, THE JERK ELEMENT DOES ATTRACT
WOMEN, BUT NO MORE SO THAN MEN ARE
ATTRACTED TO THE ‘BI**H’ ELEMENT OF
WOMEN.
Now, stick with me closely here, because the details
COUNT.
Women DO want to meet men who are kind, thoughtful,
good listeners, etc. These things are ESSENTIAL if
there is going to be any RELATIONSHIP that LASTS
in the future.
However, the SEXUAL component of the relationship
is a little DIFFERENT. There are TIMES when a woman
may very well be turned on by this “softer side” of one’s
personality.
BUT! And this is the big BUT! You must remember
that RAW ANIMALISTIC DESIRE is actually a very
SELFISH thing, in both men and women.
And, if a woman is with a man who is soooooo nice, that
he ONLY thinks of her and NOT of himself and HIS needs,
it can actually make her feel GUILTY for even THINKING
of going WILD into raw carnal sinful mode with him!!!!!!
She may feel GUILTY for wanting to be an ANIMAL
in bed!!!!!
Do you see where I’m coming from?
On the other hand, if a guy is a real JERK, she feels
NO GUILT at all about doing whatever animalistic
carnal raw behavior she WANTS to do in bed, because
she KNOWS the JERK doesn’t give a RAT’S ASS
what she thinks, and in fact the jerk will make sure
to get WHAT HE WANTS from her.
All this, ironically, helps her feel BETTER about
FREEING her inhibitions with the jerk, and about
being carnal with him. She has no GUILT about
it with him, since although she is in USING him
for sex, his jerkiness makes her feel NO GUILT
about it!
PLUS, since he himself is SO COMFORTABLE
being sexual, and TAKING, it makes her feel
more comfortable DOING THE SAME!
In this sense, the “jerk” is GIVING her MORE
than the “nice guy”- he is giving her FREEDOM
from her INHIBITIONS, he is giving her a
GUILT-FREE experience to go WILD in bed!
It’s the same way vice versa, if a woman
was TOTALLY SACRIFICING HERSELF FOR YOU,
in every way, and if she didn't care for
herself at all, you might start to feel
WEIRD about going all sexual on her, you
might even feel guilty.
THIS is why it’s so important to COMBINE the
best of BOTH WORLDS if you want to have
a woman not only LOVE AND RESPECT you
as a boyfriend, but also feel GREAT about going
WILD ANIMALISTIC CARNAL ANIMAL
with you!!!!
You do this by showing EXTREME comfort
in your own skin, extreme comfort being sexual,
and by showing that you are high self-esteem
and that you have NO SHAME in TAKING.
THIS IS GOOD FOR HER AND GOOD FOR YOU,
AND VICE-VERSA AS WELL, WHEN SHE DOES
THE SAME.
Now, at the SAME time, you ALSO show that
you ARE a good listener, that you DO care, etc.
Most guys fail to be able to COMBINE both these
elements to their VIBE, especially in the initial
approach and pick-up.
Balancing these elements is a SKILL.
And doing things RIGHT the FIRST time is
CRUCIAL, because the FIRST IMPRESSION
makes the deepest imprint on her mind and her
emotions.
A lot of this COMBINATION is shown through
SUBTLETY. It’s not that you start throwing
vulgar language around in your approach, but
rather that your tonality exudes sexuality and
confidence and still shows warmth as well.
BOTH elements are IMBUED into your conversation
and interaction, and this combination makes you that
RARE man that women go home and tell their friends
they met, and their friends get jealous about wishing
THEY could have as cool a guy approach THEM!
If you’re reading this right now, and would like
to MASTER the skills of approaching and
attracting women ANYWHERE you see them,
I suggest you take my REAL WORLD BOOTCAMP,
where I will train you in person, in the
real world, in real time, on tons of
real women.
I will take you step by step, and work
with you to get EVERY ASPECT of the
approach and attraction MASTERED- from
the actual first moment you walk-up to them,
to mastering your body language and tonality,
to calibrating your timing and your ability
to smoothly respond to anything she says
IMMEDIATELY, to breaking through your
internal obstacles, to ENSURING attraction
and a deep sense of connection in her, so
that she is eagerly waiting to see you
again and take things to a deeper level,
including the fulfillment of her erotic
fantasies with you.
It’s at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
The results of this program are incredible:
It’s not uncommon even for guys who have had
virtually NO PRIOR EXPERIENCE to then get
fantastic new girlfriends within DAYS of
completing the bootcamp!
How am I able to get guys these results
with women? It’s because I have devoted
myself to this skill and to TEACHING this
skill to other men, for TEN YEARS.
My teaching style is geared for LONG-TERM
results, it is not limited to the “party
circuit” where certain women are already
drunk and ‘out looking for a good time.’
It’s the choice for men with MATURITY, who are
looking to actually LEARN a skill set with women
that will serve them well for LIFE.
When I think back to my own life, on how many
YEARS I suffered in loneliness and in a frame of
scarcity with women, when, had I known these
skills, I could have gone out and got myself a
great new girlfriend on ANY DAY I WANTED,
I almost can’t believe it.
I sometimes wish I had a time travel machine
to visit my previous self and teach him all
that I currently know!
And if you’re reading this right now, YOU can
take advantage of what I learned and get the
women you want NOW.
The FASTEST way to learn is BOOTCAMP,
because I can see exactly what you’re doing
and get you up to speed immediately by
CUSTOMIZING my program just for you.
The bootcamp is PRIVATE, EXCLUSIVE
AND 1-ON-1.
And it’s at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
Here’s a recent letter from a man who did
even more than find great girls to date!
LETTER:
Hi Michael. I was at your boot camp in 2008.
I wanted to give you an update. I met a very
attractive and QUALITY woman in May of 2010.
A woman whose overall qualities are well beyond
what I ever expected. We're getting married in
September.
I want to thank you for the information that you
provide with your books, CD's and the info on the
bootcamp. The info you provide has helped me to
be a good boyfriend and fiance and keep our
relationship fun and fresh.
Without the info you provide I can't say that things
would have been as fun and enjoyable as they have
been. Actually, with my old way of thinking and
inaccurate outlook on myself, women and dating
in general may very well have contributed to our
relationship's demise.
You're a classy guy who truly wants to help men
be quality men who meet quality women. Your
teaching goes well beyond what a 'pick up' artist
would teach.
I'd recommend your books, cd's and bootcamp to
any guy who is looking for real answers. What you
teach can save many guys a lifetime of misery and
failure in relationships.
And yes, just because we're getting married doesn't
mean that the principles you teach are to not be applied.
They're not even principles (principles sounds a bit like
manipulation). They're just bits and pieces of information
to help men unravel the things in themselves that isn't
them and help men to be who they really are.
Keep up the good work bro.
Tom Bryson, Austin, TX.”
MY REPLY:
Thank you for the kind words and for sharing that
letter! I think it really helps when men can see
that what they will learn from the Bootcamp and
the other programs is a lot more significant than
“pick up lines”.
And if you’re reading this right now, and if
you can’t make it to Bootcamp just yet, you can
STILL master these skills by taking advantage
of my home study programs, each one of which is
the result of REAL WORLD TESTING that proves it
WORKS on getting women attracted to you.
These programs also serve as a great PREPARATION
for Bootcamp as well.
They’re at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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