If you're SERIOUS about mastering the skill of
attracting a woman, then you have to know the
difference between the "gimmicks" approach to
this whole topic, or the approach that actually
WORKS.
One of the biggest things to me is being REAL.
That means real in many different ways.
For one thing, I hate gimmicks.
So that’s why I was never into learning memorized
routines for approaching women, memorized lines,
or using “props” such as magic tricks, cards, or
anything at all like that in order to “impress” a woman.
In my gut instinct, I always knew that somehow,
the REALLY cool guys did NOT use gimmicks
to attract women.
The reason why gimmicks are popular, however,
is because they cater to the desire for an EASY
WAY OUT.
But in real life, in order to master something,
so that in fact you CAN excel at that thing
and make it look “easy”, requires some
REAL learning, some REAL input, before
you can get the beneficial OUTPUT.
Again, this does not just apply to attracting women.
So, for example, speak to any TRUE bodybuilder
who does not use steroids or growth hormone,
and he will tell you just how much EFFORT
goes into achieving results. Proper nutrition,
proper rest, gut-busting workouts. Heck, even
the STEROID champs will also tell you how
much real work goes into it, and how there
just AINT NO GIMMICKS to substitute for
all the work that goes into it.
If you want to become a doctor, you have to
STUDY LONG AND HARD.
I have never resorted to the gimmicks approach,
even though it really DOES sell.
When I think of GIMMICKS, I think of
the old campy TV show of Batman, where
he always was able to save his hide or
save the day thanks to something in his
BAT UTLITY BELT.
I used to think to myself, “If that dude
ever didn’t have this utility belt on, he’d
be FINISHED”.
I know the show was meant to be campy,
but even as a kid, it really pissed me off.
On the other hand, let’s take a character
like James Bond and the ease with which he
chats up women using a combination of
humor, sexuality, intrigue.
The truth is, there are REAL people
out there like this, and you don't
have to actually even BE "James Bond"
to master this.
The key is the ability to be compelling
through SKILL, not through gimmicks.
The truth is that it is MUCH MUCH MUCH
cooler, a trillion times cooler, to be able to
actually have the SKILLS deep inside of
you so that you can attract women and
be able to say the right things and do the
right things because you UNDERSTAND what
to do, not because you have just MEMORIZED
like a robot some lines or routines on what
to do.
Women can EASILY tell the difference.
Without actually developing the SKILLS, a guy will
be conveying the WRONG message about himself,
no matter HOW "cool" his memorized words or magic
tricks or routines or 'stage props' are.
He will be off in his timing, in his
delivery, in his body language, in
his choice of WHEN to do WHAT.
And yet, when you actually MASTER
these skills, it actually IS
easy and instinctive- that's the
difference between real skill and
looking for easy way out gimmicks-
the gimmicks NEVER really work,
but "seem easy", whereas the real
skills take some work, but then
the results DO come easy.
To me, attracting a woman you seriously want
is not something to be joked about or toyed
around with. I want you to get RESULTS,
not just scraps of attention from women.
So, for example, when it comes to the art
of actually getting a woman laughing,
I didn’t just say “tell jokes”, I actually
interviewed one of the only men alive
that actually is BOTH a comedian AND
for many years went out into the FIELD
with guys to approach women and show
them how to create attraction.
I actually could be a real witness to the
truth about what he was saying, as I
myself hung out with him and he even
served as a guest instructor together
with myself at one of my own bootcamps.
And guess what? In my interview with him,
(that is part of the Actions For Attraction Set
http://getagreatgirl.com/ActionsForAttraction.html )
you will NOT get any GIMMICKS.
Rather, you get an actual FEEL for the
BIG PICTURE of comedy and the skills
involved as well as instructions on what
you can do to enhance your SKILL at this
art. He actually GETS YOU LAUGHING
AS YOU LISTEN, and then after he is finished,
I actually BREAK DOWN, step by step, exactly
what is going on psychologically and HOW he is
making all this happen.
It’s a lot more to take in than just “here do this
1, 2, 3, and she is yours!”.
I don’t pretend that my subscribers are less
intelligent than myself, if anything, I always
aim HIGHER, because personally, that’s what
is interesting to ME. Honestly, I get a personal
satisfaction from knowing that guys that get
my material are getting the very BEST.
Similarly, for conquering “Approach Anxiety”,
I absolutely do NOT give you some “motivational
speech”. Nope, in fact, that can sometimes have
the OPPOSITE effect, by the way, as a guy
will get all PUMPED about this thing called
approaching women and make it a far bigger
deal than it needs to be, which will be uncool
to the woman, and also will create even more
stress for the guy.
Instead, I actually give you a DETAILED
step by step COMPREHENSIVE plan to
OBLITERATE APPROACH ANXIETY.
Now, when it comes to “inner game”,
which really IS important to your success
with women, some guys like to oversimplify
this by saying “just be confident” and others
try to make it overly complicated by making
it seem almost impossible.
I just care about solving the issue as efficiently
as possible, so that your inner game actually
is strong, without adding any kind of hocus
pocus gimmicks to make me sound smart.
So, this is the difference between me and
what’s out there.
Similarly, I’ve decided to focus on how to
get the kind of girl that most guys really
want- the kind of girl that is attractive
and would be a great girlfriend.
So, that’s a bit different than just trying
to get a girl into bed.
Now, just because you are looking for a
“great girl” doesn’t mean that she isn’t
attracted to a man that has the ANIMAL
WILD SIDE to him.
I’ve noticed that there is some advice
floating out there that tries to make it
seem like if you are trying to attract
a quality woman, that it’s all ONLY
about being a man of integrity, etc.
OF COURSE, these thing are CRUCIAL,
including developing the skill to truly understand
her point of view and to develop a super strong
connection, and I go DEEP into these things in
my programs, but the trick is to COMBINE
all this with ALSO conveying sexuality, fun,
dominance, and even a bit of the unpredictable.
Getting a great girl is not about finding a girl
who is going to be CHARITABLE to you
or have SYMPATHY on you and be with you
because you are a nice guy.
It’s about ATTRACTING a super high
quality woman that you are making
WILD WITH ATTRACTION FOR YOU!
So she’s got all the great physical and deeper
personality traits, including loyalty and
honesty and being a fun person, and she
is CRAZY ABOUT YOU.
Let me give you an example:
A guy who thinks that since she is a great girl,
so now he doesn’t have to know anything or
be anything, since, after all, she is so nice,
might make the tragic mistake of thinking
that he doesn’t have to DO anything or
KNOW anything, since she is so kind,
she will just treat him great, right?
WRONG.
Because even if she IS a great person,
you want her to be with you because
she is ATTRACTED, not because she
feels she is doing “the right thing”.
Otherwise, there will be problems eventually.
So, let’s say you’re dating a woman, a woman
who is attractive, a great personality, and is
obviously a woman “in demand”.
And after a few weeks, let’s just say, she tells
you about the fact that her ex-boyfriend called
her, or she tells you that she’s concerned that
maybe you and her are moving a little “too fast”,
etc, etc and that maybe you should both slow
down.
Now, most guys, they would feel insecure
about all this.
And that’s not so bad, really, it’s not the
worst thing in the world. We’re all human.
What’s bad is ACTING UPON THIS INSECURITY.
See, at this point, the woman really did nothing
WRONG. You were only dating her a few weeks,
and she didn’t do anything morally wrong here.
Now, in this situation, there are two roads
available to take:
One road is to try to STOP her from calling
the ex-boyfriend by telling her how much you
dislike it.
The same road might also suggest that you
say to her “Honey, what do you mean moving
too fast?? You want to slow things down????”
Now, let’s ask ourselves what this accomplishes:
It sends the message to her brain that you
want her to be with you as a FAVOR for YOU.
After all, it’s YOU who you are concerned
about here, right?
So, now, we have that already established.
On top of this, we have also established that
you feel that YOU are not CLEARLY the
superior value.
If you DID, you would LAUGH at this whole
thing, right?
Now, again, I’m not saying that it’s always
EASY to feel this confident, especially if
you have not been doing your inner game
work.
But at the very least, you can control your
ACTIONS.
So, let’s go a bit deeper here:
What’s REALLY going on here?
What’s going on, for whatever reason, is
either this woman is testing you, which means
she is no good, or she is honestly not feeling
enough attraction.
And if she's not feeling enough attractin, this MIGHT
mean that you were giving off needy vibes or controlling
vibes etc, etc, or simply not being fun, that caused this.
I'm not saying FOR SURE, because there are
infinite possibilities, but assuming that she WAS
originally interested, and things WERE going
great, usually there is some explanation for
why things went off course.
If she WAS feeling enough attraction, she would
have told you about the ex-boyfriend in such a way
where it was CLEAR that she was NOT
interested, and regarding the “moving
too fast” thing she would have NOT
said that.
So, your goal is always simple:
INCREASE HER ATTRACTION
And you ALWAYS have choices available.
Some choices LOWER attraction, some
choices INCREASE attraction.
When you’re dealing with interactions
with women, it’s like you’re driving
a RACE car, where the gears are all
STICK SHIFT, it’s not AUTOMATIC
TRANSMISSION.
You have to know where to put the gear.
So, if she is showing signs of LACK of
attraction, you must do what INCREASES
attraction.
Which means take the OTHER road:
So, for example, telling her “You should call
him back, he sounds lonely, it’s probably
been a long time since he’s talked to a girl,
and I guess you still qualify as a girl”
And say it with a WARM SMILE!!!!!!!!
This sends ALL the RIGHT messages and
WHAMMO SKYROCKETS the attraction.
Now, she’s thinking to herself, on a SUBCONSCIOUS
LEVEL, “there’s no FUN in that now”.
You DRANIED the “FUN” potential in her
mind of calling the ex-boyfriend because
you’ve SIMULTANEOUSLY demonstrated
SUPERIOR value in your obvious sense of
security, and you’ve subtly LOWERED his
status by explaining how lonely he is and
you’ve EVEN shown in a playful way that
she “might do” as a girl!!!!!
How many guys do you think would respond
this CORRECT way????
That’s right, about ZERO percent.
And THAT makes your response even MORE
powerful if you’ve chosen the right response-
because not only is it the right response, but
since so few guys do it right, it makes you
stand out even MORE.
Now, she’s suddenly telling you things like
“No way, I wasn’t going to call him, I was
just telling you what a weirdo he is”.
And regarding the “slow down we’re moving
too fast” if you would respond with something
like “I WAS FEELING THE SAME WAY TOO
BUT I DIDN’T WANT TO HURT YOUR FEELINGS!”
if you say it with a calm smile, she will KNOW
that you are kidding around with her, but at the
SAME TIME, she will also know the most important
thing: THAT YOU ARE NOT NEEDY FOR HER
AND WILL NOT TRY TO MAKE HER DO
SOMETHING SHE DOESN’T WANT TO DO.
Again, WHAMMO, 99 percent of the time, this
results in an INSTANT reframing on her part,
she suddenly views the situation as something
other than her original perception: Now, she’s
thinking of the issues involved in LOSING you.
Before, she was thinking of the issues involved
in having MORE CHOICES.
The brain really can’t be in two places at once.
Now, I do not believe in having to constantly
be doing these kinds of things, however, in
the RARE times when these things DO come
up, (as we are all human and they will come up),
you QUASH these issues damn well, and that
way, they will NOT arise again.
If they DO, well THEN you should definitely
NOT be with such a woman.
However, the occasional time these things happen
is YOUR OPPORTUNITY to really AMPLIFY
A WOMAN’S ATTRACTION TO YOU and
PREVENT these kinds of things from happening
much in the future, if at all.
This is ESPECIALLY true the FIRST times these
things happen, because FIRST impressions hit
the HARDEST.
First impressions hit so hard, in fact, that this is
the reason why it's SO HARD to get over the
FIRST woman that you ever were crazy about.
Since she was the FIRST, your brain actually
puts her into a very powerful category that
gets a MASSIVE "publicity in your own mind"
campaign. Your brain RAISES her level of
value and importance and all other women
seem like poor imitations.
Eventually, we get over it, and we can appreciate
other women again. But it takes time.
In a similar way, if you meet a woman and deliver
the right impression the FIRST time, it will be very
HARD for ANYONE to LESSEN her attraction
to you!!
But if you screw up on the first impression, it
will be very hard to FIX this damage.
Whether it's fair or not fair, the reality is the
brain really gets impacted on an emotional
level by the FIRST impression.
So, if a woman sees the RIGHT reactions and
the right behaviors in you the FIRST time, she
will REALLY “get the message” and I don’t
mean this in a nasty way- when I say “get the
message” I mean she will feel ATTRACTED.
Let’s be honest, this ENTIRE life is pretty
much about people trying to have more
FUN and LESS PROBLEMS.
As guys, we are interested in attractive women
because they turn us ON.
It feels AWESOME.
So, do you not want to GIVE that same feeling
to the woman you’re attracted to?
These kinds of right responses, reactions, behaviors,
GIVE a woman MORE of that attracted feeling to you.
And when you approach a woman who is
a stranger, if she is walking along the
sidewalk and it’s night time, for example,
she might be a bit more cautious than if
it were daytime and there were lots of
people around.
So by keeping that in mind, it makes sense
to get her LAUGHING as soon as possible.
In fact, this is not just attractive, it’s REQUIRED
to help her relax and not be worried, because
if she’s laughing, it’s hard for her to feel
fear or worry.
So getting a woman and attracting her and
keeping her is about mastering far deeper
things than GIMMICKS or memorized lines.
And THAT’S what my programs are all
about.
My latest programs include the Actions
For Attraction CD Set, at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/ActionsForAttraction.html
As well as my Warrior Within DVD Program,
at: http://getagreatgirl.com/warrior.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
P.S. To find out about all my programs,
go to: http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.html
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