There is a very good reason why so many attractive
women want a man who has a great sense of humor-
it's because humor is probably the closest thing to
healthy "drugs".
The reality is that laughter IS a drug, in many ways.
It releases DOPAMINE, and this chemical simply
feels GREAT. It gives you a natural high.
So it's a great power to be able to make a woman feel this.
The first thing you want to be doing to skyrocket
your power in this area is to stop CENSORING
your thoughts. Most of the time, we CENSOR
our own thoughts because we think they might
NOT be funny, and we don't want to get rejected.
It's counter-intuitive, but this actually ends up
getting us LESS results, and taking the RISK
gets you MORE results. Trying to play it
totally safe in your interactions suggests that
you are lacking confidence, self-worth, and
in fact kissing up. Screwing up in the name
of comedy actually is much cooler than
playing it boring, as it at least breaks the
tension!
If you're in line and when it finally gets your
turn, and the female clerk says "Hello, how
are you today?" , for example, you can playfully
say "Awwwwww that sounds so rehearsed,
let's do that again, with feeling!" This is
even funnier if she DID say it properly the
first time!
In my latest CD, I interviewed a fantastic comedian,
Arie Kizel, known as "the thinking man's comic", and
we have an HOUR'S worth of great advice for
gaining the power of triggering laughter in women.
A cool analogy of looking at life in an alternative
way, instead of looking at yourself or at things in
a regular mirror, think of how those crazy mirrors
at theme parks are still reflecting an image back,
but it's totally different, it's giving you a different
perspective on the same things.
Here's one important tip for creating laughter:
Realize that it's almost always about a massive
indication of superiority ------ HOWEVER,
it doesn't have to be mean-spirited to anyone
either, when done brilliantly.
For example, in the fantastic "Threw It To The Ground"
clip above, the guy is trying to show how TOUGH and
how COOL he is, but the problem is that he thinks
EVERYONE is out to get him, in fact he seems to think
ONLY the most INNOCENT things and people are
out to get him, THIS is what makes the whole thing funny.
The fact he seems really CONGRUENT is
what makes it work as well. He looks ANGRY.
He uses the same LANGUAGE as "tough guys",
but yet he is TOTALLY OFF BASE with the
things that TRIGGER his "tough guy" reaction.
And it's THIS, that makes the viewer/listener feel
SUPERIOR to such a degree, that we NATURALLY
express this great emotion through LAUGHTER.
The best kind of laughter is not nervous laughter,
it's the "FEELING GOOD" kind of laughter.
So, in the clip above, we are actually feeling a bit
SORRY for this guy, and we also are realizing
that acting so tough is not cool, is not smart, and
that in fact we may be far cooler than we realize,
it makes us feel GOOD.
And remember, it's about the CHARACTER,
i.e. the perspective within the given comedy.
If you were to actually meet Andy Samberg,
the guy playing the character, you wouldn't
think he is REALLY like this in real life,
you would just think this guy has a great
sense of humor.
A second quick tip for comedy is that you must
deliver your message CONGRUENTLY, you
must be CONSISTENT with what you are saying.
It wouldn't work, for example, if in the clip above,
if the "tough guy" started to laugh at himself, he has
to actually PLAY the character convincingly within
the reality of the comedy.
He gets upset and he "stands up for himself" in his
own mind, even when he thinks his "so called girlfriend"
is trying to fool himself that the cell phone is his dad,
or even when the little KID offers him birthday cake,
he thinks everyone is out to get him, and he ALSO
thinks he has "outsmarted" them all, that he is ON
to their "tricks"!
Too many guys try to pretend they are so perfect,
that they are afraid to take a risk being funny, they
are afraid of what will happen if the woman doesn't
find what they said to be funny.
And of course, this attitude of trying to be perfect
shuts down your creativity.
Don't be afraid to make mistakes, get it said
rather than get it said perfectly.
Fear of not saying something perfectly is giving
in to INSECURITY. And that will only feed
MORE insecurity, and that will prevent you
from saying ANYTHING funny.
Take a "comedy risk", go for it. You have
to look at things from new angles, exaggerate
things, question things - and you MUST
make sure it's something you YOURSELF
find funny, or it won't work. You have to be
CONGRUENT to what you are saying.
Notice, how in the following clip, Robin Williams
looks at "Viagra" from a creative and exaggerated
perspective, yet it's all CONGRUENT, it doesn't
seem like a "joke" to his character.
Within the reality of his character's comedy perspective,
he's totally consistent with it. This is an important
element of comedy, not to laugh at your own humor,
but to take it very seriously. That's part of what
MAKES it funny:
So, life is serious enough, let's add to both our own lives
and to women's lives, by seeing the "funny mirror" perspective
rather than always looking at things from the exact same
perspective that everyone else always does. Start to
QUESTION things in a way that actually makes
people laugh, rather than questioning everything in
a negative way.
And if you want to stay in touch with ALL the latest ways of
being your BEST with women, then sign up for my monthly
Actions For Attraction series NOW, at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/actions.html
And if you haven't yet downloaded my eBook,
do that first. It's the FOUNDATION before
moving on to my other materials.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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