Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Giving Vs. Taking For Success With Women


Sometimes I think that if guys just knew how
much women actually crave men, and how
appreciative they are of a guy who knows
how to not make them feel "cheap" yet still
knows how to UNLEASH women's many
inhibitions, every guy on earth would
then LOVE women in general and would
TOTALLY change his attitudes and his
beliefs. His inner game would SKYROCKET
and he would also feel great about himself,
thereby also unleashing his own sexual
energy in a positive, healthy way.

The thing is, it's HARD to believe this, if
the RESULTS you are getting from your
interactions with women are not so great.

So let me right here state some powerful
insights that will improve your interactions
with women immediately.

Let's first talk about the very APPROACH.
That's where it starts, right?

The problem is that most guys IMMEDIATELY
send off the wrong signals. 

They try so hard to come up with the
PERFECT opener, the perfect things to say,
that they are actually showing NOT that they
CARE about the woman, but that they care
about TAKING from the woman.

Yes, you heard me right.
Because if this was about GIVING to the
woman, the guy would feel pretty good already
and not be worried about "HOW" to give,
he would be pretty confident that it's all
going to go GREAT since after all, he is
the GIVER in the situation.

But when you are trying so hard to make sure
that you are not rejected, what you are really
conveying to the woman is that YOU want
something. Actually, worse than WANT.
Wanting is not bad, but NEEEEDING is
horrible.

And the bottom line is, she's right.
If you are trying so hard, you DO want it
so badly that it's more of a NEED for you.

That makes a woman feel PRESSURE.

It's like that feeling you get when you
walk into a store casually, and
IMMEDIATELY some amateur salesperson
creepily gives you a whole "overly clever"
SALES PITCH.

When you go to buy a FERRARI, nobody
tries to give you a desperate sales pitch.

You don't see commercials for it on TV.

YOU go to THEM to find out more.

Because, it's a FERRARI.
It has VALUE.

The FERRARI is GIVING MORE than
it's TAKING. It's giving so much that
PEOPLE go to IT, with pleasure.

In fact, it would make you feel WORSE
if they tried to desperately sell it to you.
Which is why Ferrari doesn't do that.

They don't HAVE to.

No pressure tactics necessary.

This itself shows value, but it's not
some kind of "fake" tactic, it's the
TRUTH about them, they don't need
to do the pressure stuff, so they don't.
It's the same thing with you and a woman
in many ways.

The biggest way to create RESISTANCE
IN A WOMAN is to PUT PRESSURE
on her. And the reverse is true as well,
if you put ZERO pressure on her, she
can't help but start to focus on what it
would be like if she DID decide to
spend more time with you. And it's
starting to sound like a better thing
all the time considering she is feeling
pretty good with you already and most
guys are just making her feel BAD
in infinite ways due to their low self-esteem
which causes fights, causes pressure,
and also ruins the potential for her to
feel any MEANINGFUL self-esteem
boost from them, since after all, they
are coming across as losers, so any
compliment they DO give means
NOTHING.

Guys think they are GIVING by coming
up with the perfect opener, by trying to
find out how to tap-dance around the
fact that they want to talk to her.

In reality though, the guy is simply putting
HIMSELF BELOW HER, so she will
NEVER feel like she is "GETTING"
ANYTHING from him, no matter how
hard he tries, in fact the harder he tries,
the worse it is - the more he comes across
as DRAINING her, as TAKING from her.

The way to GIVE to her, emotionally, is to
not need to TAKE from her. You have to
be EMOTIONALLY ABUNDANT regarding
everything that most guys would WANT
TO TAKE FROM HER.

So most guys want to feel VALIDATED by her?
You need to be VALIDATED yourself.

Most guys want to feel UPBEAT by her
approval? 

You must be ALREADY SELF-APPROVED,
and FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL it.

Most guys want to feel that SENSE OF HUMOR
that comes from the confidence you get when
a girl is NUTS about you?

You must be able to FEEL THAT VIBE without
her.

THIS is why I keep on saying that the ultimate
GAME is really NOT a fake, a tactic, or a "move",
it's about your "inner-game", but the thing is it
takes EXPERIENCE IN THE REAL WORLD
of interacting with women to fully get your
inner game to where it needs to be. 
Inner game is a product of many things, 
including learning vital aspects of how
your mind works, but it also requires
you actively getting out there and 
approaching women as well.

You GROW internally, so that you can
ACTUALLY really be a GIVER IN THE
ALL IMPORTANT EMOTIONAL SENSE.

Not a giver in terms of "I'll do ANYTHING
for this chick", that's actually a TAKER.
You'd do ANYTHING because you feel
you NEED her so bad. She can SENSE
that neediness, it makes her feel that you
are going to USE her, you are going to
DRAIN her, it makes her feel that you
are INFERIOR, that you are going to
bring her down.

And remember, it's not that she is THINKING
this, she is NOT CONSCIOUS of it at ALL.
She is not THINKING it, she is simply
feeling the feeling of REVULSION.

She doesn't necessarily articulate the feeling
to herself, or figure out exactly why she is
feeling it. She just DOES. She just FEELS
it.

You see, in a way, although years ago I was
pissed at the situation at how men had given
up so much official power to women, the truth
is that this has become a GREAT catalyst for
men to BECOME STRONGER THAN EVER,
since they now HAVE to. Men can finally realize
the ULTIMATE POWER they have
INTERNALLY.

And this is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more attractive
to women than anything else.

So women's lib and all that stuff?
BRING IT ON! 
As far as raw attraction is concerned, 
feminism still doesn't change anything.

IT DOESN'T CHANGE A THING.

You just have to be careful in selecting the right
woman for a long term relationship, because 
relationships require logic as well as attraction,
but as far as attraction is concerned, NOTHING
stands in the way of your attractive power when
you exhibit the right behaviors.

Women will ALWAYS respond to the stuff
I am teaching you; they can't HELP it any
more than you can help feeling HUNGRY
when you are hungry. Any more than
you feeling thirsty when you are thirsty.

The attraction will KICK IN at once,
but you HAVE TO BE CONGRUENT.

You have to work at actually BEING the
best, emotionally strongest, most fun,
YOU, instead of just ACTING it.

Okay, there's more on that even, but I need
to move on here as space and time is limited.

Although of course "courage" is attractive
to women in general, definitely, there's
something else as well.

I'd like to let you in on a little secret regarding
this:

One of the MAIN reasons women say they
want a guy who is COURAGEOUS, in my
humble opinion based on YEARS of interactions
with WOMEN who are STRIKING, is because
THEY interpret courage to mean that he will
LEAD THEM TO "PHYSICAL LEVELS" OF
INTIMACY REGARDLESS OF the fact they may 
be acting FEISTY with him and playfully even
doing things like telling him to F-OFF. 

Think about it: If there is someone you TRULY
want to AVOID, you IGNORE them. You don't start
trying to get them all riled up. 

Women tend to not be direct in their communication.
What they say and think tends to pass through
several layers of FILTERS.

You see, women HAVE to put up a bit of a
FRONT of not being so sexual. It's part of
how women survived throughout history,
by making this aspect of themselves more valuable by
DECREASING the supply, which they
did by acting coy, hard to get, less overtly
sexual, etc. But the thing is, if any guy
thinks women are less sexual than men
even 1%, they have a HUUUUUUUUUUGE
surprise coming. If anything, women are
even MORE sexual than men. Really,
once a woman is into you, she will often
be on you like bees to honey, and won't
get OFF. Your phone will be ringing
non-stop. You will regret having a
cell phone. Which is definitely not the
worst thing in the world especially if
you know how to handle it.

It takes COURAGE to be SEXUAL with
a woman, when women keep on saying
how they "don't need a man", and how they
are supposedly so happy and independent.
It's B.S. Trust me, it's TOTAL B.S.!!!!!

They are NOT happy without a man.
They NEED A MAN just as much as
a man needs a woman. 
Anything else you read or hear is just
B.S.!!!!!!!!!!
So stop reading it, cuz it's all B.S. written
usually by pretty miserable women who just
WISH they could get a cool guy, which
they might be able to do if they just stopped
being so miserable which repels any fun
guy they meet.

So you see, it takes COURAGE for a guy
to interact with women these days, and women
KNOW it. So they say they like a guy
with COURAGE. 

I'm not saying that's the ONLY kind of
courage they care about, but I'm saying
it's DEFINITELY ONE OF THE BIG
ONES.

So when a woman says this courage thing,
it's almost as if she's saying "I want a guy
who will lead me to getting physical even though I play
some pretty convincing games about being non-sexual."

Now, for any total dumb-asses out there, this
does NOT mean to be AGGRESSIVE in
a creepy way. If a woman tells you to back
off, you back off. But don't expect a
woman to lead YOU to the physical side
of things. 

Most women tend to only leave HINTS.

YOU must lead the way, for most women.
At least until you two have already
been physical with each other.

Okay, next:

The key to feeling sexual is feeling GOOD.

People want to ACCEPT THEMSELVES, but
for most people, it's not easy.

If you can help a woman ACCEPT HERSELF,
her self-esteem SKYROCKETS.

And women with high self-esteem
are AWESOME.

The thing is that most guys try to do this with
needy compliments that show the guy is
desperate. So anything he says is not meaningful
then.

So, the IMPORTANT thing in an interaction
with a woman is to NOT DO MUCH!

It's to simply BE the best version of yourself.
A self that is totally self-accepting.
And that you are not there to JUDGE HER.

How can she POSSIBLY feel BETTER
about herself if you are already feeling
BAD about her? i.e. That if she does
not GIVE you what you "want", that
you would feel HURT. And of course,
the whole idea of wanting so badly,
it ruins the whole natural vibe of just
enjoying someone else's PRESENCE.

Think about it:
The reason you hang with people you
like is not because you need anything
in PARTICULAR from them. It's
just BEING with them. That's what
vibe is all about. You enjoy being
with them because you know you
can trust them, you know they accept
you, and you accept them, and you
all give each other that good feeling
from simply accepting each other.

THIS is actually a huge part of the "game".
Getting to THAT point is the real "game".

But most guys start acting WEIRD with women,
the guy CLEARLY is trying to suddenly MAKE
something happen, he feels he NEEDS to get
a reaction, he needs there to be a RESULT.
He totally becomes this guy who is NOT
his real self. He becomes the version of
himself that is all uptight, needy, and
inferior. That's not him, that's the
distorted version of him.

It's not about DOING things for women.
It's about accepting yourself, and accepting
them, and it's about being dominant
enough to LEAD the interaction to
greater physical escalation and
chemistry.

When a woman feels zero pressure, when
she feels accepted, and when she feels
she is with a guy who is self-validated,
who is sexual and playful and loves women
and loves the physical side of relationships 
but isn't desperate, and who knows how to 
lead the show and be "courageous" and dominant, 
all this allows her OWN sexuality to
SKYROCKET and shine on through.

And on that note, let me get to some great
letters that hit upon these crucial ideas.
  
LETTER FROM A READER

Michael,

I just have to write you this message. It is now
6 o'clock in the morning here in Europe and I
just returned home from one of the most amazing
parties of my life. I read your book last week
(remember me, the Dutch speaking guy who
had some problems speaking French in
Luxemburg?) and I am now eagerly waiting
for your CD's which should arrive early
next week.

Anyway, the party. I busted the balls of
5 different really beautiful girls (background:
If I have ever busted the balls of 1 (ONE)
beautiful girl in the past during 1 night,
it would have made my year).

So thanks to your advice, I have adapted
the mentality of the MAN (which was indeed
already inside me) and spoke without fear
or hesitation with these girls. One, "Ilse",
she was still a student at 27 and I joked
with that fact and afterwards we had some
nice conversation about teaching and parties.

"Nathalie", an aerobic teacher, had a dress
with 'chains' as a pattern and I busted her
balls with asking if she liked "to be chained".
We had a wonderful conversation about
fashion and dating. "Lyndsey" was a cute
blond who liked horse riding and fitness
and came to speak to me three times because
other guys tried to hit on her and she wanted
to be rescued.

With "Patricia" and "Elsie" the same stories.

A great night thus... HOWEVER, all of them,
all 5 (FIVE) have told me during or at the
end of our conversations that I was a guy
with an enormous amount of confidence
and that I really knew how to talk with
women (thank you again Michael). BUT the
fact that they said this, made that they did
not wanted to give me their email, because
they thought I was like this with every
woman...

So my question to you is now: Can you
be too much of the MAN? or did I do
something wrong?

In the end, I do not care. I had a great night
and I lost once and for all my fear of talking
to cute women. But I would like to know if
next time I have to slow down a little bit.

Appreciate your feedback and I am eagerly
waiting for your CD's (to which you certainly
will also receive my feeback).

Enjoy your Sunday!

Ciao!

Max K.

***MY REPLY***

Hi Max,

I just got in from Bootcamp and read your
message. Congratulations first of all
for losing your fear of talking to cute
women and learning how to bust on
them.

The women were actually telling you exactly
the recipe for taking the interaction further:
"Please show me you are not treating me
like a whore, because I do like you a lot."

So when you were clearly teasing every
girl, and ONLY teasing them, it seemed
that you were not the type of guy to
actually have any connection with
any woman. That makes her feel that getting
physical with you would mean she has no
worth, because you don't even care about
her at all enough to get to know her. It would
make her feel low, as explained in the eBook.

So the answer to your question is that you can
never be The Man too much, however, it's
REALLY important to ALSO build up
TRUST, which comes from her feeling
accepted, and from feeling connection
with you, etc.

Trust is crucial for getting intimate, in fact,
the very FIRST WORDS you hear on the
CD Set are going to IMMEDIATELY get
into helping you answer this question of
"am I busting on women too much or not".

It's all ultimately about making women feel
GREAT, and that means ultimately about
enhancing their feelings of self-esteem as
well as you coming across as being
ACCEPTING of yourself and of being
sexual and of having massive worth.

This UNLOCKS the combination to her
own sexuality being unleashed, with you
and by you.

But what happens if you ONLY tease a woman
and you do not start also ADDING to that initial
chemistry the awesome emotions of connection
and trust, and all the other aspects of self-esteem,
then she will start to feel after a certain point that
you are just PLAYING with her.

It's the OPPOSITE of making her feel good.
It's making her feel that you don't REALLY
care at ALL. So now you are coming across
as a guy who COULD have been desirable,
since you HAD value. But the problem is,
since you ONLY showed that side, and
never took her interest as a cue to start
developing a connection, she feels that
you would only HURT her feelings
ultimately. i.e. That you would get physical
with her and just dump her, etc.

You want to actually take that MOMENTUM
that you built with the initial emotions of
attraction you created, because NOW she
WANTS to connect with you. NOW it
would have MEANING.
But if you just tease her, it's as if she could
have been anybody, you never created the
connection with her to find out more about
her, to get to know her, so that she could feel
special with you. So it would be making her
feel CHEAP if she went with you then.

Teasing is a powerful beginning, and often can
be used even sprinkled throughout the interaction,
but you MUST TAKE THE INTERACTION
BEYOND THIS AS WELL, into a place where
she feels not only that you are this super confident
guy, but that you also feel SHE is special.

Of course, all this can only come AFTER
she feels YOU are special.

In the meantime, review the points from the book
on making her feel total trust before she can
unleash herself physically with you. That
will help you immensely for now.

Once again, congrats on breaking through
the fear. Now, it's time to TAKE that raw
power and apply it with laser-beam focus.

LETTER FROM A READER

I recently read another book on understanding
dogs (Cesar's way by Cesar Millan). And I have
to make clear that I am NOT in any way
referring to woman as dogs, but the main
lesson of the book can be applied to human
relations as well. The author is a well-known
expert on dog behavior. He states that dogs
are pack animals and like humans they have
hierarchies where most members tend to be
followers with far fewer leaders.

He emphasizes that dogs universally respond
to a calm assertive personality. This author
states that this state-of-mind displays
leadership to a dog and all dogs tend to
be attracted to and yearn for this type of
leadership.

He goes on to state that excitable, over-emotional
behavior in dog-owners tends to be viewed by
dogs as unstable and it repel dogs and makes
them feel superior to their owners. This in turn
causes many of the behavioral problems that
this expert is consulted about.

Notice any parallels within our human
relationships??

A. X.

MY REPLY

Hey man,

Good to hear from you. Thank you for that
email, your comments and questions are
appreciated.

On understanding dogs and the parallels to
human relationships, the calm yet confident
leader personality makes total sense because
it takes GUTS to be a leader, you take
responsibility, you have to THINK, whereas
followers can shut off their brain, because
thinking and being "awake" and being
emotionally strong (i.e. not giving in to the
weak emotions that make us angry/lazy, etc)
is the "real work" of life.

It takes a LEADER to do it.
So the analogy is VERY useful.

And the CRAZY IRONY TODAY is that it is often not MEN in our society who are acting like leaders, but more often than not it is WOMEN. 

It is WOMEN who are being empowered by endless messages of encouragement to go accomplish their goals and dreams, while MEN are being BOMBARDED by endless messages of how they need to be WEAKER and KISS UP more to women, and in general encouraging men to be slaves to feelings of weakness and insecurity rather than to be objective and take charge of their fears. 

So, MORE THAN EVER, women TRULY CRAVE MEN WHO BEHAVE LIKE CLASSIC MEN.  

And if you are reading this right now, and would like to learn how to attract the women of your choice as FAST as possible, then I seriously suggest you get my two latest books on this important topic:

1. The No-B.S. Book On Success with Women Today. 
2. The Energy of Attraction.

These two new essential books will take you out of the DARK AGES and into the most POWERFUL level of attracting women FAST.

You can download these books INSTANTLY and be using them in MINUTES from now to attract the kind of women that make most men MELT:

Click Here To Download "The No-Bullshit Book On Success With Women Today"


Click Here To Download "The Energy of Attraction" Now! 


To learn more about my BOOTCAMP program, where
you learn the skill of how to attract women in person,
on women in all types of environments, go HERE:

https://www.thedatingwizardreturns.com/bootcamp.html 

Till next time,

Michael Marks




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