Giving Vs. Taking For Success With Women

Sometimes I think that if guys just knew how

much women actually crave men, and how

appreciative they are of a guy who knows

how to not make them feel "cheap" yet still

knows how to UNLEASH women's many

inhibitions, every guy on earth would

then LOVE women in general and would

TOTALLY change his attitudes and his

beliefs. His inner game would SKYROCKET

and he would also feel great about himself,

thereby also unleashing his own sexual

energy in a positive, healthy way.

The thing is, it's HARD to believe this, if

the RESULTS you are getting from your

interactions with women are not so great.

So let me right here state some powerful

insights that will improve your interactions

with women immediately.

Let's first talk about the very APPROACH.

That's where it starts, right?

The problem is that most guys IMMEDIATELY

send off the wrong signals. 

They try so hard to come up with the

PERFECT opener, the perfect things to say,

that they are actually showing NOT that they

CARE about the woman, but that they care

about TAKING from the woman.

Yes, you heard me right.

Because if this was about GIVING to the

woman, the guy would feel pretty good already

and not be worried about "HOW" to give,

he would be pretty confident that it's all

going to go GREAT since after all, he is

the GIVER in the situation.

But when you are trying so hard to make sure

that you are not rejected, what you are really

conveying to the woman is that YOU want

something. Actually, worse than WANT.

Wanting is not bad, but NEEEEDING is

horrible.

And the bottom line is, she's right.

If you are trying so hard, you DO want it

so badly that it's more of a NEED for you.

That makes a woman feel PRESSURE.

It's like that feeling you get when you

walk into a store casually, and

IMMEDIATELY some amateur salesperson

creepily gives you a whole "overly clever"

SALES PITCH.

When you go to buy a FERRARI, nobody

tries to give you a desperate sales pitch.

You don't see commercials for it on TV.

YOU go to THEM to find out more.

Because, it's a FERRARI.

It has VALUE.

The FERRARI is GIVING MORE than

it's TAKING. It's giving so much that

PEOPLE go to IT, with pleasure.

In fact, it would make you feel WORSE

if they tried to desperately sell it to you.

Which is why Ferrari doesn't do that.

They don't HAVE to.

No pressure tactics necessary.

This itself shows value, but it's not

some kind of "fake" tactic, it's the

TRUTH about them, they don't need

to do the pressure stuff, so they don't.

It's the same thing with you and a woman

in many ways.

The biggest way to create RESISTANCE

IN A WOMAN is to PUT PRESSURE

on her. And the reverse is true as well,

if you put ZERO pressure on her, she

can't help but start to focus on what it

would be like if she DID decide to

spend more time with you. And it's

starting to sound like a better thing

all the time considering she is feeling

pretty good with you already and most

guys are just making her feel BAD

in infinite ways due to their low self-esteem

which causes fights, causes pressure,

and also ruins the potential for her to

feel any MEANINGFUL self-esteem

boost from them, since after all, they

are coming across as losers, so any

compliment they DO give means

NOTHING.

Guys think they are GIVING by coming

up with the perfect opener, by trying to

find out how to tap-dance around the

fact that they want to talk to her.

In reality though, the guy is simply putting

HIMSELF BELOW HER, so she will

NEVER feel like she is "GETTING"

ANYTHING from him, no matter how

hard he tries, in fact the harder he tries,

the worse it is - the more he comes across

as DRAINING her, as TAKING from her.

The way to GIVE to her, emotionally, is to

not need to TAKE from her. You have to

be EMOTIONALLY ABUNDANT regarding

everything that most guys would WANT

TO TAKE FROM HER.

So most guys want to feel VALIDATED by her?

You need to be VALIDATED yourself.

Most guys want to feel UPBEAT by her

approval? 

You must be ALREADY SELF-APPROVED,

and FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL it.

Most guys want to feel that SENSE OF HUMOR

that comes from the confidence you get when

a girl is NUTS about you?

You must be able to FEEL THAT VIBE without

her.

THIS is why I keep on saying that the ultimate

GAME is really NOT a fake, a tactic, or a "move",

it's about your "inner-game", but the thing is it

takes EXPERIENCE IN THE REAL WORLD

of interacting with women to fully get your

inner game to where it needs to be. 

Inner game is a product of many things, 

including learning vital aspects of how

your mind works, but it also requires

you actively getting out there and 

approaching women as well.

You GROW internally, so that you can

ACTUALLY really be a GIVER IN THE

ALL IMPORTANT EMOTIONAL SENSE.

Not a giver in terms of "I'll do ANYTHING

for this chick", that's actually a TAKER.

You'd do ANYTHING because you feel

you NEED her so bad. She can SENSE

that neediness, it makes her feel that you

are going to USE her, you are going to

DRAIN her, it makes her feel that you

are INFERIOR, that you are going to

bring her down.

And remember, it's not that she is THINKING

this, she is NOT CONSCIOUS of it at ALL.

She is not THINKING it, she is simply

feeling the feeling of REVULSION.

She doesn't necessarily articulate the feeling

to herself, or figure out exactly why she is

feeling it. She just DOES. She just FEELS

it.

You see, in a way, although years ago I was

pissed at the situation at how men had given

up so much official power to women, the truth

is that this has become a GREAT catalyst for

men to BECOME STRONGER THAN EVER,

since they now HAVE to. Men can finally realize

the ULTIMATE POWER they have

INTERNALLY.

And this is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more attractive

to women than anything else.

So women's lib and all that stuff?

BRING IT ON! 

As far as raw attraction is concerned, 

feminism still doesn't change anything.

IT DOESN'T CHANGE A THING.

You just have to be careful in selecting the right

woman for a long term relationship, because 

relationships require logic as well as attraction,

but as far as attraction is concerned, NOTHING

stands in the way of your attractive power when

you exhibit the right behaviors.

Women will ALWAYS respond to the stuff

I am teaching you; they can't HELP it any

more than you can help feeling HUNGRY

when you are hungry. Any more than

you feeling thirsty when you are thirsty.

The attraction will KICK IN at once,

but you HAVE TO BE CONGRUENT.

You have to work at actually BEING the

best, emotionally strongest, most fun,

YOU, instead of just ACTING it.

Okay, there's more on that even, but I need

to move on here as space and time is limited.

Although of course "courage" is attractive

to women in general, definitely, there's

something else as well.

I'd like to let you in on a little secret regarding

this:

One of the MAIN reasons women say they

want a guy who is COURAGEOUS, in my

humble opinion based on YEARS of interactions

with WOMEN who are STRIKING, is because

THEY interpret courage to mean that he will

LEAD THEM TO "PHYSICAL LEVELS" OF
INTIMACY REGARDLESS OF the fact they may 
be acting FEISTY with him and playfully even
doing things like telling him to F-OFF. 

Think about it: If there is someone you TRULY
want to AVOID, you IGNORE them. You don't start
trying to get them all riled up. 

Women tend to not be direct in their communication.
What they say and think tends to pass through
several layers of FILTERS.

You see, women HAVE to put up a bit of a

FRONT of not being so sexual. It's part of

how women survived throughout history,

by making this aspect of themselves more valuable by

DECREASING the supply, which they

did by acting coy, hard to get, less overtly

sexual, etc. But the thing is, if any guy

thinks women are less sexual than men

even 1%, they have a HUUUUUUUUUUGE

surprise coming. If anything, women are

even MORE sexual than men. Really,

once a woman is into you, she will often

be on you like bees to honey, and won't

get OFF. Your phone will be ringing

non-stop. You will regret having a

cell phone. Which is definitely not the

worst thing in the world especially if

you know how to handle it.

It takes COURAGE to be SEXUAL with

a woman, when women keep on saying

how they "don't need a man", and how they

are supposedly so happy and independent.

It's B.S. Trust me, it's TOTAL B.S.!!!!!

They are NOT happy without a man.

They NEED A MAN just as much as

a man needs a woman. 

Anything else you read or hear is just

B.S.!!!!!!!!!!

So stop reading it, cuz it's all B.S. written

usually by pretty miserable women who just

WISH they could get a cool guy, which

they might be able to do if they just stopped

being so miserable which repels any fun

guy they meet.

So you see, it takes COURAGE for a guy

to interact with women these days, and women

KNOW it. So they say they like a guy

with COURAGE. 

I'm not saying that's the ONLY kind of

courage they care about, but I'm saying

it's DEFINITELY ONE OF THE BIG

ONES.

So when a woman says this courage thing,

it's almost as if she's saying "I want a guy

who will lead me to getting physical even though I play

some pretty convincing games about being non-sexual."

Now, for any total dumb-asses out there, this

does NOT mean to be AGGRESSIVE in

a creepy way. If a woman tells you to back

off, you back off. But don't expect a

woman to lead YOU to the physical side
of things. 

Most women tend to only leave HINTS.

YOU must lead the way, for most women.

At least until you two have already

been physical with each other.

Okay, next:

The key to feeling sexual is feeling GOOD.

People want to ACCEPT THEMSELVES, but

for most people, it's not easy.

If you can help a woman ACCEPT HERSELF,

her self-esteem SKYROCKETS.

And women with high self-esteem

are AWESOME.

The thing is that most guys try to do this with

needy compliments that show the guy is

desperate. So anything he says is not meaningful

then.

So, the IMPORTANT thing in an interaction

with a woman is to NOT DO MUCH!

It's to simply BE the best version of yourself.

A self that is totally self-accepting.

And that you are not there to JUDGE HER.

How can she POSSIBLY feel BETTER

about herself if you are already feeling

BAD about her? i.e. That if she does

not GIVE you what you "want", that

you would feel HURT. And of course,

the whole idea of wanting so badly,

it ruins the whole natural vibe of just

enjoying someone else's PRESENCE.

Think about it:

The reason you hang with people you

like is not because you need anything

in PARTICULAR from them. It's

just BEING with them. That's what

vibe is all about. You enjoy being

with them because you know you

can trust them, you know they accept

you, and you accept them, and you

all give each other that good feeling

from simply accepting each other.

THIS is actually a huge part of the "game".

Getting to THAT point is the real "game".

But most guys start acting WEIRD with women,

the guy CLEARLY is trying to suddenly MAKE

something happen, he feels he NEEDS to get

a reaction, he needs there to be a RESULT.

He totally becomes this guy who is NOT

his real self. He becomes the version of

himself that is all uptight, needy, and

inferior. That's not him, that's the

distorted version of him.

It's not about DOING things for women.

It's about accepting yourself, and accepting

them, and it's about being dominant

enough to LEAD the interaction to

greater physical escalation and

chemistry.

When a woman feels zero pressure, when

she feels accepted, and when she feels

she is with a guy who is self-validated,

who is sexual and playful and loves women

and loves the physical side of relationships 
but isn't desperate, and who knows how to 
lead the show and be "courageous" and dominant, 
all this allows her OWN sexuality to

SKYROCKET and shine on through.

And on that note, let me get to some great

letters that hit upon these crucial ideas.

  

LETTER FROM A READER

Michael,

I just have to write you this message. It is now

6 o'clock in the morning here in Europe and I

just returned home from one of the most amazing

parties of my life. I read your book last week

(remember me, the Dutch speaking guy who

had some problems speaking French in

Luxemburg?) and I am now eagerly waiting

for your CD's which should arrive early

next week.

Anyway, the party. I busted the balls of

5 different really beautiful girls (background:

If I have ever busted the balls of 1 (ONE)

beautiful girl in the past during 1 night,

it would have made my year).

So thanks to your advice, I have adapted

the mentality of the MAN (which was indeed

already inside me) and spoke without fear

or hesitation with these girls. One, "Ilse",

she was still a student at 27 and I joked

with that fact and afterwards we had some

nice conversation about teaching and parties.

"Nathalie", an aerobic teacher, had a dress

with 'chains' as a pattern and I busted her

balls with asking if she liked "to be chained".

We had a wonderful conversation about

fashion and dating. "Lyndsey" was a cute

blond who liked horse riding and fitness

and came to speak to me three times because

other guys tried to hit on her and she wanted

to be rescued.

With "Patricia" and "Elsie" the same stories.

A great night thus... HOWEVER, all of them,

all 5 (FIVE) have told me during or at the

end of our conversations that I was a guy

with an enormous amount of confidence

and that I really knew how to talk with

women (thank you again Michael). BUT the

fact that they said this, made that they did

not wanted to give me their email, because

they thought I was like this with every

woman...

So my question to you is now: Can you

be too much of the MAN? or did I do

something wrong?

In the end, I do not care. I had a great night

and I lost once and for all my fear of talking

to cute women. But I would like to know if

next time I have to slow down a little bit.

Appreciate your feedback and I am eagerly

waiting for your CD's (to which you certainly

will also receive my feeback).

Enjoy your Sunday!

Ciao!

Max K.

***MY REPLY***

Hi Max,

I just got in from Bootcamp and read your

message. Congratulations first of all

for losing your fear of talking to cute

women and learning how to bust on

them.

The women were actually telling you exactly

the recipe for taking the interaction further:

"Please show me you are not treating me

like a whore, because I do like you a lot."

So when you were clearly teasing every

girl, and ONLY teasing them, it seemed

that you were not the type of guy to

actually have any connection with

any woman. That makes her feel that getting

physical with you would mean she has no

worth, because you don't even care about

her at all enough to get to know her. It would

make her feel low, as explained in the eBook.

So the answer to your question is that you can

never be The Man too much, however, it's

REALLY important to ALSO build up

TRUST, which comes from her feeling

accepted, and from feeling connection

with you, etc.

Trust is crucial for getting intimate, in fact,

the very FIRST WORDS you hear on the

CD Set are going to IMMEDIATELY get

into helping you answer this question of

"am I busting on women too much or not".

It's all ultimately about making women feel

GREAT, and that means ultimately about

enhancing their feelings of self-esteem as

well as you coming across as being

ACCEPTING of yourself and of being

sexual and of having massive worth.

This UNLOCKS the combination to her

own sexuality being unleashed, with you

and by you.

But what happens if you ONLY tease a woman

and you do not start also ADDING to that initial

chemistry the awesome emotions of connection

and trust, and all the other aspects of self-esteem,

then she will start to feel after a certain point that

you are just PLAYING with her.

It's the OPPOSITE of making her feel good.

It's making her feel that you don't REALLY

care at ALL. So now you are coming across

as a guy who COULD have been desirable,

since you HAD value. But the problem is,

since you ONLY showed that side, and

never took her interest as a cue to start

developing a connection, she feels that

you would only HURT her feelings

ultimately. i.e. That you would get physical

with her and just dump her, etc.

You want to actually take that MOMENTUM

that you built with the initial emotions of

attraction you created, because NOW she

WANTS to connect with you. NOW it

would have MEANING.

But if you just tease her, it's as if she could

have been anybody, you never created the

connection with her to find out more about

her, to get to know her, so that she could feel

special with you. So it would be making her

feel CHEAP if she went with you then.

Teasing is a powerful beginning, and often can

be used even sprinkled throughout the interaction,

but you MUST TAKE THE INTERACTION

BEYOND THIS AS WELL, into a place where

she feels not only that you are this super confident

guy, but that you also feel SHE is special.

Of course, all this can only come AFTER

she feels YOU are special.

In the meantime, review the points from the book

on making her feel total trust before she can

unleash herself physically with you. That

will help you immensely for now.

Once again, congrats on breaking through

the fear. Now, it's time to TAKE that raw

power and apply it with laser-beam focus.

LETTER FROM A READER

I recently read another book on understanding

dogs (Cesar's way by Cesar Millan). And I have

to make clear that I am NOT in any way

referring to woman as dogs, but the main

lesson of the book can be applied to human

relations as well. The author is a well-known

expert on dog behavior. He states that dogs

are pack animals and like humans they have

hierarchies where most members tend to be

followers with far fewer leaders.

He emphasizes that dogs universally respond

to a calm assertive personality. This author

states that this state-of-mind displays

leadership to a dog and all dogs tend to

be attracted to and yearn for this type of

leadership.

He goes on to state that excitable, over-emotional

behavior in dog-owners tends to be viewed by

dogs as unstable and it repel dogs and makes

them feel superior to their owners. This in turn

causes many of the behavioral problems that

this expert is consulted about.

Notice any parallels within our human

relationships??

A. X.

MY REPLY

Hey man,

Good to hear from you. Thank you for that

email, your comments and questions are

appreciated.

On understanding dogs and the parallels to

human relationships, the calm yet confident

leader personality makes total sense because

it takes GUTS to be a leader, you take

responsibility, you have to THINK, whereas

followers can shut off their brain, because

thinking and being "awake" and being

emotionally strong (i.e. not giving in to the

weak emotions that make us angry/lazy, etc)

is the "real work" of life.

It takes a LEADER to do it.

So the analogy is VERY useful.

And the CRAZY IRONY TODAY is that it is often not MEN in our society who are acting like leaders, but more often than not it is WOMEN. 

It is WOMEN who are being empowered by endless messages of encouragement to go accomplish their goals and dreams, while MEN are being BOMBARDED by endless messages of how they need to be WEAKER and KISS UP more to women, and in general encouraging men to be slaves to feelings of weakness and insecurity rather than to be objective and take charge of their fears. 

So, MORE THAN EVER, women TRULY CRAVE MEN WHO BEHAVE LIKE CLASSIC MEN.  

And if you are reading this right now, and would like to learn how to attract the women of your choice as FAST as possible, then I seriously suggest you get my two latest books on this important topic:

1. The No-B.S. Book On Success with Women Today. 
2. The Energy of Attraction.

These two new essential books will take you out of the DARK AGES and into the most POWERFUL level of attracting women FAST.

You can download these books INSTANTLY and be using them in MINUTES from now to attract the kind of women that make most men MELT:

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Click Here To Download "The Energy of Attraction" Now! 


To learn more about my BOOTCAMP program, where

you learn the skill of how to attract women in person,

on women in all types of environments, go HERE:

https://www.thedatingwizardreturns.com/bootcamp.html 

Till next time,

Michael Marks