Whoahhh! Things have been insanely busy lately, but
awesome at the same time. The special seminar on
Sunday following an intense 3-Day "Absolute Attraction"
Real World Bootcamp, plus the release of a great interview
and now I finally have a chance to catch up on things here
at the blog!
The latest "Absolute Attraction" Real World Bootcamp
this past weekend was an extremely cool experience
as I got the chance to see the massive transformation
of a student from last year. His name is Charles and
his results were so awesome, that he was inspired and
confident enough to come back for another bootcamp
to take things to an even HIGHER level.
This is what happens when you experience results,
you then get the positive reinforcement to get
even BETTER.
The coolest thing about Charles is the way he has
mastered how to get more results using less energy.
He understands that at mastery level, there is no
"getting into the zone", because he IS the "zone",
there is no need to suddenly have to change or
become something else.
Would you like to learn to attract a quality woman
using LESS energy, LESS effort, and less headaches?
Then get ready to hear how this man has applied the
Get A Great Girl materials and bootcamp trainings
as well!
***LETTER FROM A CLIENT***
"Hello Michael!
Just wanted to thank you again for the great
experience during the boot camp. I tell you,
lowering the energy level is doing wonders.
And you know what? It feels a hell of a lot
more natural to be that way - I think I was just
used to getting results with high energy, but
like you very correctly said it feels more real
to the girls when I am with 'minimum energy'.
More importantly it feels better for me too.
Also this way, I notice that this way, I tend to
make them giggle and laugh lightly throughout
the conversation instead of making them go
super intense laughter all out at the beginning,
and this definitely sends out a stronger signal
of my personality - especially when I do it with
'minimal effort'.
It is definitely also good to know that I can always
tap into the high energy part should I need it.
That said I have a lot to improve on. Especially
making the process more efficient and truly finding
out more about the girls' personalities.
I will let you know of my progress and stories later on
( I've had 4 genuine interactions with girls who are very
attractive over the past 24 hours - not all of them matched
what I was looking for in a woman- but two of them I'd
definitely like to get to know more).
Thanks again Michael. It was an excellent bootcamp
experience and it was great to spend time with someone
who has similar perspectives to what I have about
life in general. I will get back to you with any
questions that may crop up later on.
Sincerely,
Charles K.
Los Angeles, California
>>>MY REPLY<<<
Thank you first of all for the warm message.
Isn't it AWESOME how actually LOWERING the
energy is, in your own words, doing WONDERS?
High energy brings a lot of short term
reactions, that often fizzle out by the
time you ask for the number or by the
time you call her.
But don't all the "experts" tell us
to be "he arrogant, cocky, hilarious guy"?
When a guy learns a tactic that gets a woman
doing anything too MAJOR or too strong too
fast, even something like laughing REALLY HARD
right at the outset, it's usually NOT a good
thing.
The reason for this is because even though
the woman might be laughing realllly hard at
first, or feeling realllly mesmerized, she will
then quickly feel that something is not
CONGRUENT.
By the word "congruent" I mean "consistent".
Something is not matching up, something is
not "right" about the situation.
And a woman would be right to be feeling this,
since after all, it was NOT a natural interaction,
the guy WAS trying too hard to get a reaction,
the guy WAS using a "line", the guy was NOT
being himself.
And there's no way out of the dangers of using
the pick up artist and wannabe dating guru
tactics. A woman has learned to be cautious,
for good reason. The more serious she is
about looking for a real man to be her
lover, her boyfriend, for something long
term and meaningful, the MORE alert
she will be to any signs of something
being shady or sketchy.
The key is to always use the MINIMUM ENERGY
you need in an interaction in order to make
sufficient impact to keep the conversation
going.
You applied this extremely well, including that time
you ended up having a twenty minute conversation
with that girl in the bookstore during bootcamp!
You were doing so well with her, even after
getting her number she still wanted to keep
on chatting with you!
For the guys reading this, I should explain
that Charles was having a one-to-one
conversation with a very pretty creature,
and it was NOT "over the top", he was NOT
acting like a clown, he was NOT getting her
laughing like crazy, he was NOT doing anything
weird, he had truly ADVANCED "game" that
is NOT a game- in fact, within a few minutes
of his interaction, it looked as if he and this
girl had known each other intimately for
YEARS.
The smile on her face, the relaxed look she had
in her body language toward him, leaning into
him.
So what did Charles do to get all this happening?
Well for one thing, he had practiced learning
how to tap into his natural sense of calm and
his positive nature. He learned to avoid the
dangers of "black and white" thinking- black
and white thinking is what creates massive
pressure on us when we try to approach a
woman, and we think that success equals
paradise and failure equals disaster or
the destruction of our identity.
He learned exactly HOW to embrace his worst
fears over and over again till he got
desensitized to them and built up a
resistance to this kind of pressure.
He didn't try to get into "the zone" and
instead he removed all emotional labels
from things, realizing that things are
simply what they are, which allows you
to take away the negative power of just
about any situation that can arise in
interacting with a woman.
This way, you are on a level plane that
is the real you, no need for you to
have to get all pumped and get into some
"zone" that really would exhaust you
very quickly if that was the only
way you used to get into state to
attract a woman.
He didn't try to be mr.pick up artist,
rather the woman could tell that he was
relaxed and upbeat and not trying to prove
ANYTHING to her, all from the way he used
his VOICE as I train men to do.
And this training is partially about learning
but also partially about UNLEARNING all the
things that hold you BACK from using
your voice to reflect all these cool
emotions inside you.
And he also had CONVICTION in the things
he was saying, he was revealing himself
so he was not acting and this belief and
total conviction came across as very
masculine, confident, and even calming.
I hate to quote the "dog whisperer" in how
dogs can sense your energy and if you are
feeling fear or not, but the truth is that
all human beings, and especially women,
can detect what emotional frequency you
are on, subconsciously this always happens.
And the women could tell that Charles was
only saying the things that he truly did
believe in, and that he was calm about it
in the way of true confidence that could
not be broken down even if she did happen
to disagree with him on some of his
viewpoints.
And another thing, he paid SERIOUS ATTENTION
to what the woman was saying. He listened
to her responses, which gave him the perfect
things to say back- they were all genuine
comments based on what SHE had said.
Every single "pick up artist" and dating guru
out there tells you "say this and she will say
YES" which is a total crock of horsey-poo
because there is no such thing as the
perfect thing to say---rather you need to
LISTEN to what a woman is saying to you,
so you can respond WELL.
And you need to REALLY care. If you don't,
it won't work. She'll sense that.
Most human beings think they are listening,
but the truth is that they are actually NOT
listening well at all, in fact most people
filter out just about everything they hear
if it doesn't agree with their own perspective,
they filter it out so powerfully that they
don't even HEAR the words that don't agree!
Maybe you've heard of the experiment where
guys were told to watch a group of guys
in black t-shirts passing a ball to each
other, and while this happened, a gorrilla
was actually walking in the background,
but NO ONE noticed this because they
were too busy watching the ball being
passed.
Not only do we not see what we don't
expect to see, we also create "blind spots"
in our LISTENING skills as well- we don't
HEAR what we don't agree with and we don't
hear what we don't recognize-- so imagine
how easy it is to not truly hear a woman's
words to you when those words are coming
from a female perspective that is different!
Now, imagine how terrible the communication
probably is between a man and a woman who don't
know each other at all and are meeting for the
FIRST TIME!!!! And the guy is under stress too,
from trying to be cool!!!
And then on top of that, the guy is being told
by supposed "EXPERTS" not to listen to a woman
but to be all "alpha" and not listen to her
and be the boss and to instead just uselessly
try to make some cheesy pick up lines work!!!!!
All this instead of learning the skills of
TRULY LISTENENING, and this is a skill, it
is something that requires learning, it's
NOT as simple as people think at all.
And we are told by these "experts" that
listening is for "WUSSES"!!!!
The truth is, it takes a REAL MAN to be secure
enough to be able to TRULY give another person
a chance at being heard, to truly let another
person's perspective to have a chance at being
respected and honored before jumping to the
conclusion that if it disagrees with our own,
it must be a crappy perspective.
Is it any wonder that things are so tough
for men when it comes to getting a great
woman?
A great woman has her internal act together as
well, she's not just attractive on the outside-
and I assure you that if she has her act together
and her listening skills together, and she is
secure enough to listen well to you, she will
not stick with a man if he is too weak to
listen properly because he is afraid that even
HEARING another perspective will somehow
threaten him.
I used to be the WORST at this.
I HATED the idea of "communication" with women.
I believed all the crazy stuff I was told by dating gurus.
But the reality is, if we as men follow their
"no communiation" advice, we WILL STILL be
communicating to women, but doing it BADLY-
we will be communicating that we are insecure.
This is just the tip of the ICEBERG of the
skills that I teach. And of course, this has
nothing to do with being a "nice guy"- in
fact, it's IMPORTANT that you DO have
conviction in what you say to a woman,
and that you don't just let your opinions
get disrespected,but the key to showing
this conviction is to state your opinion
CALMLY and FOLLOW your convictions calmly,
with quiet strength, not by acting all
emotional about it.
If we really believe in something, the way
to show a woman we are serious is to be CALM
and consistent and CLEAR about it.
The more emotional we get, the more
we are showing fear, and the truth is,
if we REALLY believed something
was the right thing and we were so
clear on what to do, we WOULD be
calm about it and not feel pressured
or threatened by anyone else.
When communicating to a woman, you want
to be totally under control. It's not
about controlling women, it truly is
about controlling the self and learning
to improve the self.
And that's why it's fantastic to hear you say
that this "minimum energy" feels a "hell of a lot
more natural to be that way". It IS.
Once you develop these skills for real,
then meeting and attracting the women of
your choice feels like there is NO effort.
There is no more need to have to "get into
the zone" because you ARE "the zone" always,
it IS you. YOU become attractive, on the
deepest level of who you ARE.
This way, because the conversation becomes
very easy for you and easy to make it flow,
you also end up making the women laugh
throughout the conversation, since
your brain is now freed up from having
to spend tons of energy on all kinds of
useless things like memorizing pick up
lines or trying to be the boss or
trying to apply some tactic that feels
totally un-natural on every level.
So all that extra brainpower can now
be applied to humor- think of it like
a computer who has now had its processor
freed up to do important work.
Of course, when you also learn the
keys behind ALL humor, as I teach you,
you are able to find the funny
moments in things even easier!
And at the same time, you can be
having a serious discussion and then
something humorous comes up, and you
both laugh naturally at it, breaking
the tension in a great way,and also
allowing you to now get back with
her to building a powerful and serious
connection, now that you had a short
break from the serious convo so you
both have energy to get "serious"
again.
And because you are LISTENING and CARING at
the highest level, you can contribute effective and
meaningful feedback, which makes her interested
in the conversation, and interested in YOU.
And the fact you had the guts to do this while
every OTHER guy who talks to her uses cheesy
tactics based on oversimplification, YOU are
the one she wants, you are the guy who feels
REAL, while the other guys are the ones that
seem shady, and sketchy, and fake, and she wants
to AVOID those guys like the plague.
And of course, there is a TIME for the higher-
energy stuff. For example, in a crazy loud
club or pub on a Saturday night or something
like that when everyone is going crazy and
most people are drunk ---but even THERE,
if you wanted to get the kind of women that
are there, and you probably don't want those
kinds of women for the most part, even THERE
the reality is that you only want to put in the
MINIMUM "higher energy" that you need.
So you basically are matching the woman's
energy level always, and actually giving just
a bit MORE energy at first, so this way you
are the giver and not the person bringing
the energy down.
But from there, you slowly bring the energy
to a more calm zone.
Of course, there's no way to do full justice to
this topic in a newsletter, and there is so much
more detail I would like to mention to give the
FULL picture, but this should at least give some
serious insight onto what actually WORKS.
You can start a conversation with many different
types of comments, but you never want to start
with something that shows lack of respect, vulgarity,
or weakness. You can comment on anything in the
situation, but what I like to do is find something
that actually says something GOOD about her,
that is GENUINE.
So if a woman is reading a book in the award
winning literary section of the bookstore, you
might start with "Nice to see that there are still
people who read literature instead of watching
MTV" and say this calmly, not in a big clown
way.
Regarding creating a powerful connection, the
key is to LISTEN TO HER RESPONSE so that
you can MAKE HER FEEL GOOD in a genuine
way. Congruency is key, as a woman will usually
KNOW when you are faking. I get into all this
in SUPER DETAIL in my materials and in my
live training programs of course.
So, you want to be listening to something in her
reply that either provides evidence of her good
character, her intelligence, or something else
positive about her, or at least something she
says that you can comment on that will lead
the conversation somewhere INTRIGUING
AND MEANINGFUL. And this is a whole
topic into itself for another time!
Best,
Michael
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/
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