Today, it's almost as if a lot of men
and women are afraid to even STAND UP
for integrity, honor and loyalty.
It's almost not "cool" to be this way.
They mistake these immortal attributes
for stupidity.
They don't understand at all.
The truth, though, is that a wise woman
will appreciate the strength of a MAN'S
loyalty. And of course, a wise man will
do the same for a woman.
This same focus on INTEGRITY rather than
on trivialities, helps you detect whether
a woman is quality or not, on the inside.
In the movie "Unforgiven", Eastwood's
character is an example of a guy who
is THE MAN. He understand there
are things more important than
getting "free ones" with women.
His love for his wife, even though
she has passed away, is something
that sustains him, long after she
has passed away.
It's as if he knows the real deal, and
no one could fool him on anything.
Somehow, you just know that his character
wouldn't be the type learning pick up
lines and trying to get women to like
him by being someone other than himself.
Our society today can learn a lot
from this, and no, I don't mean
to go around with guns a blazing,
I mean to have this level of
TOTAL INTEGRITY WITHOUT APOLOGY
FOR BEING A GREAT MAN.
Notice in the clip below, how
his character actually VALIDATES
this woman and how powerful an
effect it has on her, because
his words are not coming from
a place of weakness or neediness
but from inner strength.
This is what I mean by how you
CAN be good to a woman, when
it comes from a place of internal
strength.
The relevant content is the first
two minutes and 13 seconds, then
after that, go straight to 10:16:
Showing posts with label interview with Michael Marks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label interview with Michael Marks. Show all posts
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Advanced Strategies On Approaching Women
There's nothing like having the KNOW-HOW
One of the greatest mistakes that guys make
So start with something that is still EMOTIONALLY
RELEVANT, i.e. interesting, funny, intriguing, etc,
but that does not have heavy “PICK-UP" connotations.
Here' an example:
Let’s say you meet her at the gas station while
you’re filling up your car, you can make a playful
comment about the cost of fuel or playfully accuse
her of harming the environment by driving rather
than walking, and if she says, “How about you?” then
you can playfully say back, “This isn’t about me,
don’t change the topic!”.
Notice though, how this conversation did not start
off as an obvious FLIRT. It started LOWER key,
it was NOT about PICKING HER UP.
Now, after a bit more small talk, i.e. 30 seconds
to a minute's worth of small talk, where you were
responding to whatever her reply was to you about
the driving, THEN at this new point, you can
transition into more FLIRTY conversation, (i.e.
"I bet you come to the gas station just in hopes
of meeting a cool guy like me") because NOW you
are in an actual CONVERSATION.
Once you are in a CONVERSATION, it’s now more
socially acceptable to flirt with them, and they'll
It's crucial to do things RIGHT.
You want to have as much GOING
for you as possible, right?
You don’t want to make things
harder for yourself or miss out
on potential opportunities with
the right woman or women.
If you want to learn to ACE the skill of
APPROACHING WOMEN, as well as
how to attract and keep a fantastic woman,
I suggest you download my book,
"Get A Great Girl" immediately at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
To find out about ALL my programs for
helping you meet and keep the woman
of your dreams, go here:
http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
Till next time,
Michael Marks
of exactly what to do when you see a woman
or group of women you'd like to approach.
One of the greatest mistakes that guys make
when approaching women is regarding WHEN to
start flirting. And by flirting, I mean
things like playfully teasing her in a
non-malicious way, things like looking her
over, things like having a certain James Bond
tonality in your voice, etc.
Most men either NEVER FLIRT in the original
conversation (thinking "that can come later")
or even worse, they start flirting TOO EARLY.
Timing is CRUCIAL.
Flirting too EARLY is especially disastrous when
dealing with women that are of a higher quality
inside and out, the kind of women who aren't
promiscuous party girls.
The problem with flirting too early, is
that it triggers all the WRONG things:
1. It makes you come on TOO STRONG, trying
TOO hard, which actually makes her feel that
you are not acting “normal”.
2. This in turn, sets off her alarms for thinking
you are probably just trying to get in her pants.
3. Because she’s met about a million guys that JUST
want to get into her pants and don’t care about anything
ELSE in life, she has thus been conditioned to SHUT
GUYS DOWN when she senses this.
At the same time, this does NOT mean that
you should start a conversation in a
BORING way, but the reality is that unless
you are in a club where the energy is high
and the music is blaring, you are going to
do WORSE if you start the interaction in
any way that seems like an obvious “pick up”.
A club IS for pick-up, so it’s practically
EXPECTED there, but in a normal place like
a gas station or book store or food court,
it’s NOT designed especially for men and
start flirting. And by flirting, I mean
things like playfully teasing her in a
non-malicious way, things like looking her
over, things like having a certain James Bond
tonality in your voice, etc.
Most men either NEVER FLIRT in the original
conversation (thinking "that can come later")
or even worse, they start flirting TOO EARLY.
Timing is CRUCIAL.
Flirting too EARLY is especially disastrous when
dealing with women that are of a higher quality
inside and out, the kind of women who aren't
promiscuous party girls.
The problem with flirting too early, is
that it triggers all the WRONG things:
1. It makes you come on TOO STRONG, trying
TOO hard, which actually makes her feel that
you are not acting “normal”.
2. This in turn, sets off her alarms for thinking
you are probably just trying to get in her pants.
3. Because she’s met about a million guys that JUST
want to get into her pants and don’t care about anything
ELSE in life, she has thus been conditioned to SHUT
GUYS DOWN when she senses this.
At the same time, this does NOT mean that
you should start a conversation in a
BORING way, but the reality is that unless
you are in a club where the energy is high
and the music is blaring, you are going to
do WORSE if you start the interaction in
any way that seems like an obvious “pick up”.
A club IS for pick-up, so it’s practically
EXPECTED there, but in a normal place like
a gas station or book store or food court,
it’s NOT designed especially for men and
women to meet each other for the first
time.
So the key is to start in a way that is NOT a clear
“flirt” or “pick-up”, but is still fun or cool.
If you start in a way that seems too flirty,
she will often actually act insulted, as if
in her mind she is saying to you "You think
I’m easy, you think I'm that kind of woman?”
“flirt” or “pick-up”, but is still fun or cool.
If you start in a way that seems too flirty,
she will often actually act insulted, as if
in her mind she is saying to you "You think
I’m easy, you think I'm that kind of woman?”
Similarly, even if she is studying by herself somewhere
like a cafe, just because she is by herself does not
mean she should be treated like an "easy" choice,
because you still need to respect the steps involved.
So start with something that is still EMOTIONALLY
RELEVANT, i.e. interesting, funny, intriguing, etc,
but that does not have heavy “PICK-UP" connotations.
Here' an example:
Let’s say you meet her at the gas station while
you’re filling up your car, you can make a playful
comment about the cost of fuel or playfully accuse
her of harming the environment by driving rather
than walking, and if she says, “How about you?” then
you can playfully say back, “This isn’t about me,
don’t change the topic!”.
Notice though, how this conversation did not start
off as an obvious FLIRT. It started LOWER key,
it was NOT about PICKING HER UP.
Now, after a bit more small talk, i.e. 30 seconds
to a minute's worth of small talk, where you were
responding to whatever her reply was to you about
the driving, THEN at this new point, you can
transition into more FLIRTY conversation, (i.e.
"I bet you come to the gas station just in hopes
of meeting a cool guy like me") because NOW you
are in an actual CONVERSATION.
Once you are in a CONVERSATION, it’s now more
socially acceptable to flirt with them, and they'll
love it now.
It's crucial to do things RIGHT.
You want to have as much GOING
for you as possible, right?
You don’t want to make things
harder for yourself or miss out
on potential opportunities with
the right woman or women.
If you want to learn to ACE the skill of
APPROACHING WOMEN, as well as
how to attract and keep a fantastic woman,
I suggest you download my book,
"Get A Great Girl" immediately at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
To find out about ALL my programs for
helping you meet and keep the woman
of your dreams, go here:
http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
Till next time,
Michael Marks
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
How Good Guys Can WIN With Women
One of the most MASSIVE realizations I had
when it came to women was that a lot of things
are not what they appear to be.
So, for example, have you ever tried for years to
be a "nice guy" with women and you never got
results? For example, a woman never calling
you back and that was all you wanted as a
"nice guy"- how to know how to get a woman
to call you back?
This kind of thing happens to MILLIONS of men,
so you are not alone.
However, the problem is that the answer is not
to become jerks or to try to act like pick up artists
or players. If this actually worked, the problem
would have been solved for all men a long time
ago.
There is a reason why both being a "nice guy" and
being an arrogant or cocky guy or being a player
BOTH don't work. It's because the best kind of
women are attracted to STRENGTH of character.
In fact, even women who are messed UP are often
ALSO attracted to strength of character as well!
Now, when a man takes on the act of being a player
or being arrogant or being a really slick pick up artist,
he is actually conveying MASSIVE insecurity.
A woman who is already confident, can smell this
insecurity from far away. She knows that a man who
is secure would not need to OVERDO things so much.
So we already know that the pick up artist stuff
doesn't work to get a great woman, and in fact
repels her.
So why does the "nice guy" stuff not work either?
Well, the reason is because the truth is that "nice guys"
actually are NOT that nice, as I will show you:
"Nice guys" are very MEAN to ONE person.
In fact, they are mean to one person VERY CLOSE
to them, the closest in fact: THEMSELVES.
People can argue till the cows come home
that good guys have good intentions, but
so will jerks also argue that they are
saints as well.
It's what you DO and how you live your LIFE
that counts. If you are weak and kiss up
and reward a woman who hasn't earned it,
you are no better than a jerk who
manipulates women.
Both types of guys are doing wrong actions
to satisfy some internal weakness.
So, for example, a man who keeps on calling a
woman who does not return his calls, or a man
who even spends too much time THINKING
about a woman who is not giving him HALF
the amount of energy that he is putting into
chasing her, well this man is very MEAN
actually.
He is MEAN to himself.
He is basically telling himself and saying that he
is NOT WORTH treating any BETTER than this.
Have you ever had a woman that you chased
really HARD, and that you thought was somehow
a SPECIAL person for some reason?
Usually, there IS no reason, we just FEEL that there
is, but these feelings are the result of BAD CONDITIONING.
They can be overcome.
Women ARE attracted to strength of character, AND
to goodness, but there is nothing strong and nothing
GOOD about being a guy who allows himself to
be abused, and even if he just doesn't respect himself
enough.
This is why I have decided to use the term "REINVENTING
THE GOOD GUY" so that we stop thinking of GOOD
as being something "nice" or weak, because in reality
GOODNESS is the result of STRENGTH, and it's
NEVER self-abusive or self-hurting.
So the RIGHT way to be thinking about being CONFIDENT
and CHARISMATIC is not to come to it from a "I AM
THE BOSS OVER A WOMAN" angle but rather from
true goodness, starting with being good to yourself.
And NOT from having to boss around a woman.
In fact, the whole "I have to CONTROL a woman" through
games, pick up artist tactics, or anything else always
ends up showing up to a woman as insecurity and
fear and looks very much like "wuss" behavior to her.
A woman can detect these fears and thoughts from
the way you behave, in the same way you can
often tell what your best friend is thinking or
feeling before they even tell you, simply because
you can tell and read his or her body language.
Well, women are good at reading body language
because even as children they spend more time
developing these skills whereas boys develop
other skills better. So it's really a waste of
time to try to fake it with a woman, it's
far better to actually DEVELOP the right
behaviors, and perspectives- this way a woman
KNOWS you are for real.
So, make sure to first have a firm belief in your
OWN value, not out of arrogance, but out of
being your own best FRIEND. A woman, on an
subconscious level, wants to see some PROOF
that you are valuable, and if YOU don't value
yourself, how can she feel you have value?
Not only that, but if you believe that good people
have value, if you REALLY believe that, then
why would you ever allow yourself to chase
after a woman who didn't show any particularly
great characteristics of her own?
When you stop obsessing with the superficial for
REAL, you really DO show that you value character,
and now two things happen- you suddenly find that
more women are attracted to you, (because you
are proving that there are other things of value
besides the superficial and that you are one of
those valuable people ) and you also find that you
really ARE less obsessed now with the superficial-
because actions become emotions, and your
new lifestyle has given you new perspectives
and new appreciation for the bigger picture.
Don't get me wrong, of course you will want and
you SHOULD want physical attraction in a woman,
but you will be in the right balance to truly be a cool
guy with all women. A MAN, not a boy playing
"pick up artist".
So the best combination is to be a GOOD guy with women,
but also to be a good guy to YOURSELF and never, EVER
do anything below your dignity to try to earn a woman's
approval - besides, chasing after her in itself is what will
destroy her attraction to you. It's like you are saying "I don't feel
I have value, but could YOU please treat me really well
out of PITY?"
And this is EXACTLY the kind of reaction that
is generated in a woman for a guy who is not
truly good, but is just "nice" in a weak sense-
she might feel PITY for him, but not ATTRACTION.
And you of course also end up ruining your own
"inner game" this way because your actions are
telling your brain that you are pathetic.
Now, I'd like to share a letter with you to show
just how powerful this stuff is, to the point that
you often don't even have to DO anything because
you are giving off all the millions of subtle signals
through your demeanor and values and beliefs.
***LETTER FROM A READER***
Hi Michael, hope you're doing well.
A few ridiculously relevant things have popped up
in my life pretty much at the exact same time you've
released this new line of material. Great stuff so far...
haven't had time to finish the book yet, but it's the
next level for sure.
Quick background on me - most of my life, suffered
from all that brainwashing you talk about and was
extremely unsuccessful with women. After slowly
but surely letting you lead me out of that sh**hole
with your materials, this "inner game" stuff is sinking
in exponentially. There's evidence for this. over the
last year, I have been easily... a little too easily...
attracting women who are extremely hot. sometimes
it's obvious, other times, you just know from the
way they keep on acting around me.
anyways, as a result of my inner game getting
really tight thanks in no small part to you, I've been
getting lots of attention from hot girls without really
even doing anything "special" at all.... including this
girl at work has been hitting on me like crazy over
the past month.
Actually, more than hitting on me. whenever I walk
by, or whenever I interact with her, she ALWAYS has
to twist the topic into something that obviously states
how bad she wants to have sex with me (eg."I want
to have sex with you"). she laughs and jokes when
she says it, but that's what the subject matter leads
to all the time.
Now, in my humble opinion, this girl is OFF THE
CHARTS HOT, with a caveat: married with two kids.
anyways, this flirting thing continued, and my last
day at that site, she got my email in a very sneaky
way (pretended that her hotmail was down, and
while she got me to log onto mine to "see if it was
just her hotmail or all of hotmail that was messed
up", she snuck a peek at my email address and
emailed me that night).
ok, now I was like... whoa. I literally thought I
was just an outlet at work for some possible marital
dissatisfaction, and I didn't think she'd take it to the
next level. anyways, I still somehow gave her the
benefit of the doubt that she didn't really mean
business b/c I just couldn't believe people cheat this
easily and that people were this weak (even though
I was just as weak once but in another way).
I only responded to one out of every 3 or 4 of her
emails... just for fun really... and I thought it was
all benign until today... when in a brief email she
just said it: "so, are you into booty calls?".
This is when a revelation happened. My immediate
answer was "not with a married woman, thanks",
but I wasn't mean about it and felt terribly sorry
for her, so I padded her ego a bit.
don't get me wrong, "physiologically" I wanted to
have so much physical with her that I couldn't walk
for a while, but my standards and principles are
getting clearer. this time, mind won over body.
infidelity is something I just don't support at all.
anyways, realizing I had this clarity and the fact
that the decision was so easy and that I could care
less what anyone thought is the most empowering
thing ever. really. when I was weaker in the past,
even though I never believed in infidelity, I may
have thought about doing it out of sheer weakness
and lack of self value (that I better take what I can
get), or "man, people would think I'm such a loser
for passing this up".
not anymore. me: 1 insecurity: 0
But then, I started talking to friends about it, cuz
it kind of disturbed me. and maybe I really need
a wake up call, but what some of them said shocked
me. an acquaintance of mine told me, "man, what
are you doing? that's the safest sex out there.
married women are often the most discrete", and
this same person said he regularly has booty call
sex with married women, and even more routinely
takes home girls in the bar who have boyfriends".
although other people were not as extreme in their
opinions regarding this, they told me... "geez, maybe
I would have done it... and everybody seems to be
doing that these days anyway".
Even one of my best friends (and honestly Michael,
my best friends are people I am very proud of as
they really are awesome guys) said that when he
was younger he actually slept with a married woman
(he does regret it though).
Now, I know this has no effect on my principles, and
my principles stand, no matter what anyone says....
and I realize that those people who say "don't worry
no one will find out" don't get the freakin point at all
- it's not about getting away with it versus getting
caught, it's about selling your soul or not. but all
this new info about the world was truthfully
DEPRESSING.
I thought, THIS IS THE F*****G WORLD WE LIVE
IN????? The value of marriage, or even relationships,
has plummetted this low???
Of course, not all men and women are like this, but
it's the trend that I find exceedingly disturbing now
that I'm truly awake to it. Most people get caught
up in the "*** ** *** ***" mentality to women that
you allude to (that show is a CLASSIC example of
those moron "experts", don't even get me started as
to how misleading I think that show is).
It's amazing that it's so easy to justify participation
in infidelity these days as just another honest sleazy
act by just saying to yourself "all's fair in love and war".
and I just can't see why so many people buy into it.
Sleeping with a married chick (or a chick with a boyfriend)
just isn't congruent with someone who perceives that he
has true inner value. If you know you have value, the
whole idea is absurd - analagous to eating off of someone
else's plate when you're at a buffet (you KNOW you
have unlimited food at the buffet, so why eat someone
else's).
But more important than that. This little incident
allowed me to reflect on the whole "how to get a great girl"
theme of yours, and totally made things clear.
You attract what you are, so if you want to attract a
scummy girl, do scummy things. If you don't want
a cheating girl in your life, or even better, if you
WANT a girl who vomits at the idea of cheating and
has kick ass values, she will likely value a guy that
has those values.
Plus, you become stronger yourself with every
hard/monumental decision you make in life because
each decision seems to add to the makeup of your
"juice", as you say, in the middle of an orange.
(that analogy where pressure on an orange will
bring out whatever juice is inside the orange).
that juice = the real YOU.
So the YOU that you are constructing with each
decision you make (whether by direct effect or by
the messages that the decision sends to your brain) will
ultimately be brought out at some point because
life's pressures always exist, and that great girl
at some time I believe WILL see that real you
and either love it or hate it. so better make a good
you with good cumulative decisions.
As well, I'm realizing that I actually value relationships
to a high degree. and I just realized that by making
decisions such as partipating in cheating (whether you
are the cheater or the one she is cheating with), you
REDUCE how much you value relationships/marriage
whether you are aware of it or not.
I learned this by the opposite effect, as after making
my decision, I noticed how my value for relationships
/marriage actually INCREASED. it just did.
I agree by leading in this way is a rare and special
form of attraction to a special woman that she is
likely not going to see much of in this ridiculous
world. when one day you put a ring on the finger
of that deserving woman, that ring means as much
as the decisions you've made in this regard up
until that day (ie, the promise of marriage has as
much value as the amount that you value marriage).
you'll know it, and I think, at least subconsciously,
so will she.
anyways, peace.
Robert T.
Miami
>>>MY COMMENTS<<<
Awesome stuff. You illustrated so many points-
the first one is that as you escalate in your own
internal development, THAT is when you will
find that those who are not like you will suddenly
notice the change even more, and yet at the SAME
time, the reality also is that as you become
a MASTER, a woman like her will already
SENSE that she is barking up the wrong tree
and won't even TRY. Of course, the fact you
didn't give in to external social/cultural pressure
makes you that much CLOSER to that development.
Also, you have done something else very powerful
The fact that you have PROVEN to yourself that
you can stick to your values shows you that it IS
possible, and that there are women out there just
like you as well.
It's interesting how I noticed that all the people
and pick up experts who tried to scare the hell
out of everyone by saying that with their "skills"
they could get any woman to cheat, well guess
what? It was THESE GUYS THEMSELVES
who were cheaters, and since they could not
trust themselves, of course they could not trust
women- so they go and label all women as
cheaters.
There are cheaters and there are people who won't
cheat for a billion dollars. When you are not naïve,
when you are intelligent and you are a person of
integrity, you are then able to also far easier detect
OTHERS who have the SAME level of integrity
and intelligence.
There actually ARE enough men and women with
great integrity and character, but until
you bring yourself up, you can't notice
them, the same way that if you aren't
conscious of say, a red Honda car, you
won't notice them, and then when you are,
you'll see lots of them.
Similarly, when you yourself have changed,
as you are doing right now, you will start
to notice them as well, because you will
gravitate towards different people,
who lead to others with similar values.
This is part of what Tony Robbins would
call "sensory acuity" - your senses and
your mind become super-attuned to where
to get what you want, because you have
BECOME the very same thing yourself.
You have already started the process,
as you have explained, you are
experiencing internal changes already
and have barely had the new book
for a week...
And of course, when a person is a cheater who has no
integrity, he will then hang out with similar types.
Hence, the pick up artist crowd that hangs out
at drunken clubs and parties till they are smashed
and vomiting over toilets. That is, as Bill Cosby
says, how some people "enjoy" their weekend
because they feel they "deserve" to enjoy this
type of "party".
The other thing of course is that a fantastic woman
who has HER act together will expect that this
test of character you went through should be
super EASY for you in the future. Because she
already has this stuff worked out in her mind
and she's not going to invest her fantastic
character and emotions in just any guy.
TRUST is key, and again, this is where the
pick up artist and the typical "dating guru"
culture really is not equipped to handle
this level of trust. Their stuff is designed
for parties, for emotionally low level
interactions, it's not designed for the kind
of interaction that can serve as a real foundation
for the future.
So now that you have passed THIS level, you
have now opened the doors to a far more ELITE
level woman- not just any girl, but a GREAT girl.
You already could have had all the booty calls
on earth, with women who are smoking hot,
and all without DOING anything, no pick
up artist games or gimmicks.
This is NOT a coincidence- it's a direct result of
your skyrocketing internal development that you
have applied from what you learned.
Way to go! And keep in touch as you continue
to improve!
And if you are reading this right now and would like to
meet a fantastic woman that will cherish you forever,
then download my special book, Get A Great Girl:
What The Dating Gurus Never Told You, immediately.
This book is CRUCIAL if you want to get a GREAT woman
in your life. It will show you how to approach her and
how to build a GENUINELY powerful connection as
well as create a deep attraction in her. This is not
some re-hashed info here, it's the most powerful,
modern tools on EARTH for meeting a great woman
and building a QUALITY future with her.
It will also show you how to rid your mind of the fears
that plague you right at that very moment that you
want to approach her, and this book will show you to
smoothly handle "getting physical" in a way that
is comfortable and classy. And it will show you
how to keep the attraction going strong long into
the future, and much MUCH more.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com
And if you would like to master every element of what
the "seduction" community knows, so that there is
NOTHING they can use against you, including their
"how to get any woman to cheat" tactics, then get my
SEDUCTION MASTERY APPRENTICESHIP PROGRAM.
This program is the result of years of in-field
research on every element of "pick-up" that
you can imagine. If you want the full picture
and the TRUTH on "pick up," this program is
your resource to master the skill of meeting
women anywhere.
It's at:
http://thedatingwizard.com/seductionmastery.htm
And if you would like to learn IN PERSON how
to approach women and spark intense attraction
in them,then my special 3 DAY REAL WORLD BOOTCAMP
is for you. You are going to learn how to approach
women of quality and how to attract them, all without
any types of pick up lines and all without you having
to pretend you're someone that you're not.
This program is ONE ON ONE, and it's all instructed
exclusively by me. This way, you get my entire
focus as for 3 days and 3 nights I will coach you
on every element of the interaction, from the
walk up to the initial opening and sparking attraction
to building a truly solid connection.
It's at:
http://thedatingwizard.com/bootcamp.htm
Best,
Michael
(c) 2008 Get A Great Girl
All Rights Reserved.
COPYRIGHT PROTECTION OF THIS
ENTIRE NEWSLETTER INCLUDING
THE PRESENTATION FORMAT AND
CONTENT OF THIS NEWSLETTER,
WILL BE STRICTLY ENFORCED.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
*************************************
Disclaimer: This is a complimentary
newsletter teaching men how to be more
successful at meeting women and dating.
The information here, as well as in
my website,book and in my consultations,
is a personal opinion and should be used
for entertainment only.
You are responsible for what you do
with it, and it's up to you to make sure
your actions with women are legal and
consensual.
Nothing from Get A Great Girl's website,
book,newsletter, or consultations is to
be considered legal or personal advice.
If you did not request this e-mail,
we apologize. You can unlist yourself
by clicking the link at the bottom of
this email.
Stories, questions, and comments printed
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from ACTUAL PEOPLE.
Comments are often edited for purposes
of clarity.
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you're learning, and send it to
michaelmarks@getagreatgirl.com
Make sure the subject line says
"For NEWSLETTER".
when it came to women was that a lot of things
are not what they appear to be.
So, for example, have you ever tried for years to
be a "nice guy" with women and you never got
results? For example, a woman never calling
you back and that was all you wanted as a
"nice guy"- how to know how to get a woman
to call you back?
This kind of thing happens to MILLIONS of men,
so you are not alone.
However, the problem is that the answer is not
to become jerks or to try to act like pick up artists
or players. If this actually worked, the problem
would have been solved for all men a long time
ago.
There is a reason why both being a "nice guy" and
being an arrogant or cocky guy or being a player
BOTH don't work. It's because the best kind of
women are attracted to STRENGTH of character.
In fact, even women who are messed UP are often
ALSO attracted to strength of character as well!
Now, when a man takes on the act of being a player
or being arrogant or being a really slick pick up artist,
he is actually conveying MASSIVE insecurity.
A woman who is already confident, can smell this
insecurity from far away. She knows that a man who
is secure would not need to OVERDO things so much.
So we already know that the pick up artist stuff
doesn't work to get a great woman, and in fact
repels her.
So why does the "nice guy" stuff not work either?
Well, the reason is because the truth is that "nice guys"
actually are NOT that nice, as I will show you:
"Nice guys" are very MEAN to ONE person.
In fact, they are mean to one person VERY CLOSE
to them, the closest in fact: THEMSELVES.
People can argue till the cows come home
that good guys have good intentions, but
so will jerks also argue that they are
saints as well.
It's what you DO and how you live your LIFE
that counts. If you are weak and kiss up
and reward a woman who hasn't earned it,
you are no better than a jerk who
manipulates women.
Both types of guys are doing wrong actions
to satisfy some internal weakness.
So, for example, a man who keeps on calling a
woman who does not return his calls, or a man
who even spends too much time THINKING
about a woman who is not giving him HALF
the amount of energy that he is putting into
chasing her, well this man is very MEAN
actually.
He is MEAN to himself.
He is basically telling himself and saying that he
is NOT WORTH treating any BETTER than this.
Have you ever had a woman that you chased
really HARD, and that you thought was somehow
a SPECIAL person for some reason?
Usually, there IS no reason, we just FEEL that there
is, but these feelings are the result of BAD CONDITIONING.
They can be overcome.
Women ARE attracted to strength of character, AND
to goodness, but there is nothing strong and nothing
GOOD about being a guy who allows himself to
be abused, and even if he just doesn't respect himself
enough.
This is why I have decided to use the term "REINVENTING
THE GOOD GUY" so that we stop thinking of GOOD
as being something "nice" or weak, because in reality
GOODNESS is the result of STRENGTH, and it's
NEVER self-abusive or self-hurting.
So the RIGHT way to be thinking about being CONFIDENT
and CHARISMATIC is not to come to it from a "I AM
THE BOSS OVER A WOMAN" angle but rather from
true goodness, starting with being good to yourself.
And NOT from having to boss around a woman.
In fact, the whole "I have to CONTROL a woman" through
games, pick up artist tactics, or anything else always
ends up showing up to a woman as insecurity and
fear and looks very much like "wuss" behavior to her.
A woman can detect these fears and thoughts from
the way you behave, in the same way you can
often tell what your best friend is thinking or
feeling before they even tell you, simply because
you can tell and read his or her body language.
Well, women are good at reading body language
because even as children they spend more time
developing these skills whereas boys develop
other skills better. So it's really a waste of
time to try to fake it with a woman, it's
far better to actually DEVELOP the right
behaviors, and perspectives- this way a woman
KNOWS you are for real.
So, make sure to first have a firm belief in your
OWN value, not out of arrogance, but out of
being your own best FRIEND. A woman, on an
subconscious level, wants to see some PROOF
that you are valuable, and if YOU don't value
yourself, how can she feel you have value?
Not only that, but if you believe that good people
have value, if you REALLY believe that, then
why would you ever allow yourself to chase
after a woman who didn't show any particularly
great characteristics of her own?
When you stop obsessing with the superficial for
REAL, you really DO show that you value character,
and now two things happen- you suddenly find that
more women are attracted to you, (because you
are proving that there are other things of value
besides the superficial and that you are one of
those valuable people ) and you also find that you
really ARE less obsessed now with the superficial-
because actions become emotions, and your
new lifestyle has given you new perspectives
and new appreciation for the bigger picture.
Don't get me wrong, of course you will want and
you SHOULD want physical attraction in a woman,
but you will be in the right balance to truly be a cool
guy with all women. A MAN, not a boy playing
"pick up artist".
So the best combination is to be a GOOD guy with women,
but also to be a good guy to YOURSELF and never, EVER
do anything below your dignity to try to earn a woman's
approval - besides, chasing after her in itself is what will
destroy her attraction to you. It's like you are saying "I don't feel
I have value, but could YOU please treat me really well
out of PITY?"
And this is EXACTLY the kind of reaction that
is generated in a woman for a guy who is not
truly good, but is just "nice" in a weak sense-
she might feel PITY for him, but not ATTRACTION.
And you of course also end up ruining your own
"inner game" this way because your actions are
telling your brain that you are pathetic.
Now, I'd like to share a letter with you to show
just how powerful this stuff is, to the point that
you often don't even have to DO anything because
you are giving off all the millions of subtle signals
through your demeanor and values and beliefs.
***LETTER FROM A READER***
Hi Michael, hope you're doing well.
A few ridiculously relevant things have popped up
in my life pretty much at the exact same time you've
released this new line of material. Great stuff so far...
haven't had time to finish the book yet, but it's the
next level for sure.
Quick background on me - most of my life, suffered
from all that brainwashing you talk about and was
extremely unsuccessful with women. After slowly
but surely letting you lead me out of that sh**hole
with your materials, this "inner game" stuff is sinking
in exponentially. There's evidence for this. over the
last year, I have been easily... a little too easily...
attracting women who are extremely hot. sometimes
it's obvious, other times, you just know from the
way they keep on acting around me.
anyways, as a result of my inner game getting
really tight thanks in no small part to you, I've been
getting lots of attention from hot girls without really
even doing anything "special" at all.... including this
girl at work has been hitting on me like crazy over
the past month.
Actually, more than hitting on me. whenever I walk
by, or whenever I interact with her, she ALWAYS has
to twist the topic into something that obviously states
how bad she wants to have sex with me (eg."I want
to have sex with you"). she laughs and jokes when
she says it, but that's what the subject matter leads
to all the time.
Now, in my humble opinion, this girl is OFF THE
CHARTS HOT, with a caveat: married with two kids.
anyways, this flirting thing continued, and my last
day at that site, she got my email in a very sneaky
way (pretended that her hotmail was down, and
while she got me to log onto mine to "see if it was
just her hotmail or all of hotmail that was messed
up", she snuck a peek at my email address and
emailed me that night).
ok, now I was like... whoa. I literally thought I
was just an outlet at work for some possible marital
dissatisfaction, and I didn't think she'd take it to the
next level. anyways, I still somehow gave her the
benefit of the doubt that she didn't really mean
business b/c I just couldn't believe people cheat this
easily and that people were this weak (even though
I was just as weak once but in another way).
I only responded to one out of every 3 or 4 of her
emails... just for fun really... and I thought it was
all benign until today... when in a brief email she
just said it: "so, are you into booty calls?".
This is when a revelation happened. My immediate
answer was "not with a married woman, thanks",
but I wasn't mean about it and felt terribly sorry
for her, so I padded her ego a bit.
don't get me wrong, "physiologically" I wanted to
have so much physical with her that I couldn't walk
for a while, but my standards and principles are
getting clearer. this time, mind won over body.
infidelity is something I just don't support at all.
anyways, realizing I had this clarity and the fact
that the decision was so easy and that I could care
less what anyone thought is the most empowering
thing ever. really. when I was weaker in the past,
even though I never believed in infidelity, I may
have thought about doing it out of sheer weakness
and lack of self value (that I better take what I can
get), or "man, people would think I'm such a loser
for passing this up".
not anymore. me: 1 insecurity: 0
But then, I started talking to friends about it, cuz
it kind of disturbed me. and maybe I really need
a wake up call, but what some of them said shocked
me. an acquaintance of mine told me, "man, what
are you doing? that's the safest sex out there.
married women are often the most discrete", and
this same person said he regularly has booty call
sex with married women, and even more routinely
takes home girls in the bar who have boyfriends".
although other people were not as extreme in their
opinions regarding this, they told me... "geez, maybe
I would have done it... and everybody seems to be
doing that these days anyway".
Even one of my best friends (and honestly Michael,
my best friends are people I am very proud of as
they really are awesome guys) said that when he
was younger he actually slept with a married woman
(he does regret it though).
Now, I know this has no effect on my principles, and
my principles stand, no matter what anyone says....
and I realize that those people who say "don't worry
no one will find out" don't get the freakin point at all
- it's not about getting away with it versus getting
caught, it's about selling your soul or not. but all
this new info about the world was truthfully
DEPRESSING.
I thought, THIS IS THE F*****G WORLD WE LIVE
IN????? The value of marriage, or even relationships,
has plummetted this low???
Of course, not all men and women are like this, but
it's the trend that I find exceedingly disturbing now
that I'm truly awake to it. Most people get caught
up in the "*** ** *** ***" mentality to women that
you allude to (that show is a CLASSIC example of
those moron "experts", don't even get me started as
to how misleading I think that show is).
It's amazing that it's so easy to justify participation
in infidelity these days as just another honest sleazy
act by just saying to yourself "all's fair in love and war".
and I just can't see why so many people buy into it.
Sleeping with a married chick (or a chick with a boyfriend)
just isn't congruent with someone who perceives that he
has true inner value. If you know you have value, the
whole idea is absurd - analagous to eating off of someone
else's plate when you're at a buffet (you KNOW you
have unlimited food at the buffet, so why eat someone
else's).
But more important than that. This little incident
allowed me to reflect on the whole "how to get a great girl"
theme of yours, and totally made things clear.
You attract what you are, so if you want to attract a
scummy girl, do scummy things. If you don't want
a cheating girl in your life, or even better, if you
WANT a girl who vomits at the idea of cheating and
has kick ass values, she will likely value a guy that
has those values.
Plus, you become stronger yourself with every
hard/monumental decision you make in life because
each decision seems to add to the makeup of your
"juice", as you say, in the middle of an orange.
(that analogy where pressure on an orange will
bring out whatever juice is inside the orange).
that juice = the real YOU.
So the YOU that you are constructing with each
decision you make (whether by direct effect or by
the messages that the decision sends to your brain) will
ultimately be brought out at some point because
life's pressures always exist, and that great girl
at some time I believe WILL see that real you
and either love it or hate it. so better make a good
you with good cumulative decisions.
As well, I'm realizing that I actually value relationships
to a high degree. and I just realized that by making
decisions such as partipating in cheating (whether you
are the cheater or the one she is cheating with), you
REDUCE how much you value relationships/marriage
whether you are aware of it or not.
I learned this by the opposite effect, as after making
my decision, I noticed how my value for relationships
/marriage actually INCREASED. it just did.
I agree by leading in this way is a rare and special
form of attraction to a special woman that she is
likely not going to see much of in this ridiculous
world. when one day you put a ring on the finger
of that deserving woman, that ring means as much
as the decisions you've made in this regard up
until that day (ie, the promise of marriage has as
much value as the amount that you value marriage).
you'll know it, and I think, at least subconsciously,
so will she.
anyways, peace.
Robert T.
Miami
>>>MY COMMENTS<<<
Awesome stuff. You illustrated so many points-
the first one is that as you escalate in your own
internal development, THAT is when you will
find that those who are not like you will suddenly
notice the change even more, and yet at the SAME
time, the reality also is that as you become
a MASTER, a woman like her will already
SENSE that she is barking up the wrong tree
and won't even TRY. Of course, the fact you
didn't give in to external social/cultural pressure
makes you that much CLOSER to that development.
Also, you have done something else very powerful
The fact that you have PROVEN to yourself that
you can stick to your values shows you that it IS
possible, and that there are women out there just
like you as well.
It's interesting how I noticed that all the people
and pick up experts who tried to scare the hell
out of everyone by saying that with their "skills"
they could get any woman to cheat, well guess
what? It was THESE GUYS THEMSELVES
who were cheaters, and since they could not
trust themselves, of course they could not trust
women- so they go and label all women as
cheaters.
There are cheaters and there are people who won't
cheat for a billion dollars. When you are not naïve,
when you are intelligent and you are a person of
integrity, you are then able to also far easier detect
OTHERS who have the SAME level of integrity
and intelligence.
There actually ARE enough men and women with
great integrity and character, but until
you bring yourself up, you can't notice
them, the same way that if you aren't
conscious of say, a red Honda car, you
won't notice them, and then when you are,
you'll see lots of them.
Similarly, when you yourself have changed,
as you are doing right now, you will start
to notice them as well, because you will
gravitate towards different people,
who lead to others with similar values.
This is part of what Tony Robbins would
call "sensory acuity" - your senses and
your mind become super-attuned to where
to get what you want, because you have
BECOME the very same thing yourself.
You have already started the process,
as you have explained, you are
experiencing internal changes already
and have barely had the new book
for a week...
And of course, when a person is a cheater who has no
integrity, he will then hang out with similar types.
Hence, the pick up artist crowd that hangs out
at drunken clubs and parties till they are smashed
and vomiting over toilets. That is, as Bill Cosby
says, how some people "enjoy" their weekend
because they feel they "deserve" to enjoy this
type of "party".
The other thing of course is that a fantastic woman
who has HER act together will expect that this
test of character you went through should be
super EASY for you in the future. Because she
already has this stuff worked out in her mind
and she's not going to invest her fantastic
character and emotions in just any guy.
TRUST is key, and again, this is where the
pick up artist and the typical "dating guru"
culture really is not equipped to handle
this level of trust. Their stuff is designed
for parties, for emotionally low level
interactions, it's not designed for the kind
of interaction that can serve as a real foundation
for the future.
So now that you have passed THIS level, you
have now opened the doors to a far more ELITE
level woman- not just any girl, but a GREAT girl.
You already could have had all the booty calls
on earth, with women who are smoking hot,
and all without DOING anything, no pick
up artist games or gimmicks.
This is NOT a coincidence- it's a direct result of
your skyrocketing internal development that you
have applied from what you learned.
Way to go! And keep in touch as you continue
to improve!
And if you are reading this right now and would like to
meet a fantastic woman that will cherish you forever,
then download my special book, Get A Great Girl:
What The Dating Gurus Never Told You, immediately.
This book is CRUCIAL if you want to get a GREAT woman
in your life. It will show you how to approach her and
how to build a GENUINELY powerful connection as
well as create a deep attraction in her. This is not
some re-hashed info here, it's the most powerful,
modern tools on EARTH for meeting a great woman
and building a QUALITY future with her.
It will also show you how to rid your mind of the fears
that plague you right at that very moment that you
want to approach her, and this book will show you to
smoothly handle "getting physical" in a way that
is comfortable and classy. And it will show you
how to keep the attraction going strong long into
the future, and much MUCH more.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com
And if you would like to master every element of what
the "seduction" community knows, so that there is
NOTHING they can use against you, including their
"how to get any woman to cheat" tactics, then get my
SEDUCTION MASTERY APPRENTICESHIP PROGRAM.
This program is the result of years of in-field
research on every element of "pick-up" that
you can imagine. If you want the full picture
and the TRUTH on "pick up," this program is
your resource to master the skill of meeting
women anywhere.
It's at:
http://thedatingwizard.com/seductionmastery.htm
And if you would like to learn IN PERSON how
to approach women and spark intense attraction
in them,then my special 3 DAY REAL WORLD BOOTCAMP
is for you. You are going to learn how to approach
women of quality and how to attract them, all without
any types of pick up lines and all without you having
to pretend you're someone that you're not.
This program is ONE ON ONE, and it's all instructed
exclusively by me. This way, you get my entire
focus as for 3 days and 3 nights I will coach you
on every element of the interaction, from the
walk up to the initial opening and sparking attraction
to building a truly solid connection.
It's at:
http://thedatingwizard.com/bootcamp.htm
Best,
Michael
(c) 2008 Get A Great Girl
All Rights Reserved.
COPYRIGHT PROTECTION OF THIS
ENTIRE NEWSLETTER INCLUDING
THE PRESENTATION FORMAT AND
CONTENT OF THIS NEWSLETTER,
WILL BE STRICTLY ENFORCED.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
*************************************
Disclaimer: This is a complimentary
newsletter teaching men how to be more
successful at meeting women and dating.
The information here, as well as in
my website,book and in my consultations,
is a personal opinion and should be used
for entertainment only.
You are responsible for what you do
with it, and it's up to you to make sure
your actions with women are legal and
consensual.
Nothing from Get A Great Girl's website,
book,newsletter, or consultations is to
be considered legal or personal advice.
If you did not request this e-mail,
we apologize. You can unlist yourself
by clicking the link at the bottom of
this email.
Stories, questions, and comments printed
in these newsletters are NOT MADE UP by
Get A Great Girl - they are sent
from ACTUAL PEOPLE.
Comments are often edited for purposes
of clarity.
Names are changed to protect the
privacy of contributors.
By sending a question or comment, you
agree to allow us to use it in future
newsletters and you agree that your
submissions are honest. If you're
under 18, please unsubscribe by
clicking the unsubscribe link at
the bottom of this email.
To send us a letter, keep it brief, let us
know how you're using the material
you're learning, and send it to
michaelmarks@getagreatgirl.com
Make sure the subject line says
"For NEWSLETTER".
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Your Internal Power With Women
Success in attracting a woman boils down
to the MAGICAL emotions you are creating
within YOURSELF that you then instinctively
make HER feel as well, as a consequence.
The mistake that most guys make is that
they want to know how to make HER feel,
which puts all the focus OUTSIDE of
themselves instead of where it should be,
which is WITHIN ourselves.
When you focus OUTSIDE of yourself,
you're missing the boat in many ways:
For one thing, you're sending the wrong
message to your brain, that the value is
all OUTSIDE yourself. That will then
lower your confidence and charisma.
It's about conquering the INNER self
first, and not allowing yourself to
give into all the negative forces
that seek to DESTROY all that makes
your soul BURN with VITALITY and
CHARISMA.
In the words of Corey Hart, you
must "never surrender" even in
the darkest of times.
Second, when you focus outside yourself
rather than on the emotions within yourself,
you're ignoring the most powerful source
of your ability to attract a woman, and
that is the infinite positive emotions that
you can exude by focusing on your
emotions.
So what are the emotions you need to feel
internally, and how do you GET these
emotions?
These emotions can be almost ANYTHING,
as long as they are INTENSE and POSITIVE.
This, though, has nothing to do with acting
EXTREME. Extreme and over-compensating
type behaviors usually flow from feeling
WEAKNESS.
The positive emotions I am talking about include
that feeling of being sexually alive, or feeling
UNSTOPPABLE, or feeling INSANE confidence,
if you felt insane levels of power within you, or
even if you are in a state of total emotional
liberation or intrigue, these emotions TAKE
OVER and change your brain's mode from
THINKING mode into INSTINCT mode.
This INSTINCT mode is known as "flow".
In this "flow" state, everything comes together
in your brain instinctively, you know what to
do, you know what to say. Now, to help you
along, there are training devices such as
having ideas on what to say, and that's
great, and I provide those as well as this
deeper info in my materials. COMBINING
those tools with THIS stuff is the ultimate
power.
So for example, let's just say a woman you
are calling for a date says that she has friends
coming in this week so she can't meet you-
Well, if you are SURE you are the MAN, if
you FEEL it in your bones then you know she
IS missing out, so you tell her "your friends
want you to meet a real man like me" with a
smile, knowing full well that she will LIKE
this attitude in a man who is SERIOUS about
his own value.
This is similar to a guy who knows he is the
best candidate for a job not being deterred
because he heard that the place was not
hiring, or he heard that the place was really
AGAINST the idea of hiring outsiders, etc.
In other words, he KNOWS he is the best
value, so he goes in there knowing he is
GIVING more than taking. And when he
does, this impresses the employer
far MORE, it shows that in fact he IS
the one they have been looking for.
There's never a thought of wanting a
FAVOR from anyone here, and the same
thing applies with the difference in
your attitude between a guy who is
trying desperately or a guy who is
trying to give the WOMAN a chance,
not hoping that she will give HIM a
chance.
A woman LIKES this, it's attractive.
When she sees a man is truly
meaning that he is the real deal,
all without a shred of desperation,
it sets him apart from the rest.
See the difference?
It makes all the difference in the world.
This difference is what allows you to easily
"control the frame" because it truly is your
psychological frame, or perspective, of the
situation. Whoever believes in their frame
more, WINS, end of story.
So let me get to THINGS YOU CAN DO
TO HELP YOURSELF GET INTO THIS
STATE OF MIND.
1. EMOTIONALLY FOCUS ON THE
FACT SHE'S A WOMAN.
When you see a woman you like
Don't just think of her as a person.
Think of her as a WOMAN.
REVEL in her beauty.
FORGET the politically correct hogwash.
The reality is that there is NOTHING to be
ashamed of for feeling sexual emotions, and
in fact FEELING THIS is GOOD for you
and for your success with a woman.
This is especially true if you're a "nice guy".
Nature is helping you here, if you just allow
It to help you.
When you are feeling sexual, your demeanor
improves, it becomes more masculine, your
voice tonality reflects your sexual state, and
it helps HER also go into a more sexual state
of mind.
It puts you in the right frame of mind to help
you become more resourceful to do all the
right things at the right moment know without
even TRYING.
Whatever STATE OF MIND you are in will
affect what you are doing. If you are in a
business state of mind, you will be good for
discussing Wall Street with some business
person. If you are in a sexual state, you
will be good for chatting up a woman you
are sexually interested in.
Now, of COURSE I think that there is MORE to
every woman than her sexuality.
What I'm saying though there is that when
you are trying to approach a woman you
are SEXUALLY interested in, for the sake
of DATING her and getting to be her MAN,
then you better be in the sexual state when
approaching her.
It's ironic that the very thing that can help us,
(this sexual state of mind, which she is helping
you be in simply by her PRESENCE there) is
the thing that we HOLD BACK on as men, so
often.
We have been brainwashed to think
that this is somehow more attractive, to act
as if a woman was not a woman. It doesn't
make anybody happy, including women.
This doesn't mean that the TOPICS you
discuss with her should be sexual. No,
rather it means that your BODY LANGUAGE
will improve in the right way because of
your sexual state of mind.
2. CHANGE YOUR INTERNAL LANGUAGE
The key to being in a great state when you
meet a woman is to try to KEEP YOUR
STATE pretty damn good all year round.
And the way to DO this is to start to MONITOR
and CHANGE the language you use to THINK
even to YOURSELF.
So, for example, stop thinking of women as
"obstacles" or as "targets" who need to be
"gamed".
This language creates a very REAL internal
feeling that women are somehow inherently
DIFFICULT.
This is simply NOT true, although I'm
sure it often seems that way.
The reality is that just about every HUMAN BEING
is simply using whatever strategy they think works
best to SURVIVE. And some people have some
pretty destructive strategies, for others and them-
selves, and some people have fantastic ones that
help themselves and everyone else as well.
So learn to CATCH yourself using language that
creates a thought pattern of women being the
enemy.
Also, catch yourself using language that BEATS UP
on yourself- it's AMAZING how many times we
will say things like "what an IDIOT I am" or
"how could I screw up like this???" or even
things like "mann, get OUT of this place,
these women are for SURE thinking I'm
a loser" etc, etc, etc.
The reality is that this language is WRONG,
it's NOT the truth, but we keep on using it
again and again. And it only REINFORCES
limiting results, it only holds you BACK.
Listen, when you go to a movie that is
INSPIRING, someone ELSE has put the
effort forth to try to help YOU for just
a few bucks in the price of the ticket.
But why won't WE be an even BETTER
FRIEND to OURSELVES?????????
Why can't you ALLOW YOURSELF to
take a COMPLIMENT from yourself?
Why can't you allow yourself to speak
to yourself in a language that may
CHALLENGE you, but only challenge
you to be your BEST, rather than just
BEAT yourself up all the time?
CHANGE the language you use with
yourself.
In fact, use language with yourself that
creates FANTASTIC VISUALS as well.
So, for example, think to yourself not
just "I'm going to approach that woman"
but "I'm going to approach that woman
with the quiet calm and power of a
nuclear submarine" or "I'm going to
throw this fear of approaching women
into a special "MENTAL INCINERATOR"
and destroy that fear FOREVER- now
I honestly hope the WHOLE WORLD
is watching me on TV, because there
is no way I can 'screw up' as long as
I have been a MAN and taken serious
ACTION to chat to her."
3. YOU'RE IN THE SOLUTION
OR YOU'RE IN THE PROBLEM.
You have to make a CHOICE about your life
with women and your state of mind in general
as well.
No matter what your CHALLENGE is, it
is going to be two totally DIFFERENT
emotional experiences, and two totally
DIFFERENT realities as well in terms
of RESULTS, depending on ONE thing:
Are you taking actions toward the SOLUTION?
Or are you continuing to just wallow in the
PROBLEM??
It doesn't MATTER how far gone you think
you are, it doesn't matter how horrible you
feel, the reality is that as SOON as you
CHANGE TRACKS toward the SOLUTION,
you will feel MASSIVE CHANGE and you
will very soon start to see that your results
with women and your internal state is
IMPROVING for REAL.
The problem is that when we are in the wrong
state, it is almost PARALYZING. The
emotions of frustration and depression and
anger and fear are just like THICK SLUDGE
that gums up your entire works and makes
you feel like doing NOTHING towards
truly taking positive action to helping
yourself.
And THAT IS the greatest tragedy of all,
when in reality there is so much potential
so close but it SEEMS like it's so far away.
The moment you take ACTION, even if
it's just one BABY step, you send an indirect,
but CRUCIAL message to your brain that
you are in CONTROL and this in itself
BOOSTS your self-esteem and it begins
to LIBERATE all the awesome emotions
within you that not only feel so good but
also attract women.
And of course that makes you take
FURTHER actions of the right kind
that get you further results, etc, etc.
4. DON'T REPRESS NEGATIVE EMOTIONS
One of the biggest mistakes you can do for
your "inner game" in general is to REPRESS
all the negative emotions we feel.
As men, we have been wrongly conditioned
to think the best thing to do is always to
SHUT DOWN our emotions.
Now, this doesn't mean to act like a cry-baby
or a clown.
What it does mean is that when you feel
tremendous negative emotions, including
fear of approaching a woman, calling a
woman, escalating physically, or you feel
that you don't have the VALUE it takes
for this woman or for any particular woman,
then the best thing you can do is FEEEEL
the emotions in the following way:
A: Don't judge the emotions. Just feel them.
If you are feeling cold, or hot, or if your
chest muscles feel tight, just FEEL the
feelings. Don't label them as fear or
anger or pain or good or bad or anything.
Just FEEL the emotional sensations for
what they actually ARE and nothing else.
The PHYSICAL FEELINGS.
If you do this, if you just let the feelings
HAPPEN, you will notice something
wonderful- these negative emotions will
PASS THROUGH YOU and go AWAY.
They can't pass through you if you REPRESS
them. But if you just allow yourself to
RELAX, ironically enough, as you FEEL
these emotions without judging them,
they will then pass THROUGH you, allowing
you to be liberated again and allowing you
to unleash the infinite power of your inner
state to attract the women of your choice.
And if you are reading this right now and
would like to experience what life can be
like when you have CHOICE with women,
then I suggest you sign up for a bootcamp
with me as soon as possible. In bootcamp,
I will work with exclusively with you, and
train you in the REAL WORLD, including
approaching women in coffee shops, bookstores,
trendy lounges, and cafes.
It's simple: You will walk away from this training
with the skills to approach women anywhere and
get numbers, emails, and dates.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
And if you haven't taken advantage of my other
materials on how to meet, approach, and date the
best quality women on Earth, then do that now.
The place to start is my book, Get A Great Girl.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
And to learn how the most successful men on earth
WIN with women, business and life, go to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/win.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
to the MAGICAL emotions you are creating
within YOURSELF that you then instinctively
make HER feel as well, as a consequence.
The mistake that most guys make is that
they want to know how to make HER feel,
which puts all the focus OUTSIDE of
themselves instead of where it should be,
which is WITHIN ourselves.
When you focus OUTSIDE of yourself,
you're missing the boat in many ways:
For one thing, you're sending the wrong
message to your brain, that the value is
all OUTSIDE yourself. That will then
lower your confidence and charisma.
It's about conquering the INNER self
first, and not allowing yourself to
give into all the negative forces
that seek to DESTROY all that makes
your soul BURN with VITALITY and
CHARISMA.
In the words of Corey Hart, you
must "never surrender" even in
the darkest of times.
Second, when you focus outside yourself
rather than on the emotions within yourself,
you're ignoring the most powerful source
of your ability to attract a woman, and
that is the infinite positive emotions that
you can exude by focusing on your
emotions.
So what are the emotions you need to feel
internally, and how do you GET these
emotions?
These emotions can be almost ANYTHING,
as long as they are INTENSE and POSITIVE.
This, though, has nothing to do with acting
EXTREME. Extreme and over-compensating
type behaviors usually flow from feeling
WEAKNESS.
The positive emotions I am talking about include
that feeling of being sexually alive, or feeling
UNSTOPPABLE, or feeling INSANE confidence,
if you felt insane levels of power within you, or
even if you are in a state of total emotional
liberation or intrigue, these emotions TAKE
OVER and change your brain's mode from
THINKING mode into INSTINCT mode.
This INSTINCT mode is known as "flow".
In this "flow" state, everything comes together
in your brain instinctively, you know what to
do, you know what to say. Now, to help you
along, there are training devices such as
having ideas on what to say, and that's
great, and I provide those as well as this
deeper info in my materials. COMBINING
those tools with THIS stuff is the ultimate
power.
So for example, let's just say a woman you
are calling for a date says that she has friends
coming in this week so she can't meet you-
Well, if you are SURE you are the MAN, if
you FEEL it in your bones then you know she
IS missing out, so you tell her "your friends
want you to meet a real man like me" with a
smile, knowing full well that she will LIKE
this attitude in a man who is SERIOUS about
his own value.
This is similar to a guy who knows he is the
best candidate for a job not being deterred
because he heard that the place was not
hiring, or he heard that the place was really
AGAINST the idea of hiring outsiders, etc.
In other words, he KNOWS he is the best
value, so he goes in there knowing he is
GIVING more than taking. And when he
does, this impresses the employer
far MORE, it shows that in fact he IS
the one they have been looking for.
There's never a thought of wanting a
FAVOR from anyone here, and the same
thing applies with the difference in
your attitude between a guy who is
trying desperately or a guy who is
trying to give the WOMAN a chance,
not hoping that she will give HIM a
chance.
A woman LIKES this, it's attractive.
When she sees a man is truly
meaning that he is the real deal,
all without a shred of desperation,
it sets him apart from the rest.
See the difference?
It makes all the difference in the world.
This difference is what allows you to easily
"control the frame" because it truly is your
psychological frame, or perspective, of the
situation. Whoever believes in their frame
more, WINS, end of story.
So let me get to THINGS YOU CAN DO
TO HELP YOURSELF GET INTO THIS
STATE OF MIND.
1. EMOTIONALLY FOCUS ON THE
FACT SHE'S A WOMAN.
When you see a woman you like
Don't just think of her as a person.
Think of her as a WOMAN.
REVEL in her beauty.
FORGET the politically correct hogwash.
The reality is that there is NOTHING to be
ashamed of for feeling sexual emotions, and
in fact FEELING THIS is GOOD for you
and for your success with a woman.
This is especially true if you're a "nice guy".
Nature is helping you here, if you just allow
It to help you.
When you are feeling sexual, your demeanor
improves, it becomes more masculine, your
voice tonality reflects your sexual state, and
it helps HER also go into a more sexual state
of mind.
It puts you in the right frame of mind to help
you become more resourceful to do all the
right things at the right moment know without
even TRYING.
Whatever STATE OF MIND you are in will
affect what you are doing. If you are in a
business state of mind, you will be good for
discussing Wall Street with some business
person. If you are in a sexual state, you
will be good for chatting up a woman you
are sexually interested in.
Now, of COURSE I think that there is MORE to
every woman than her sexuality.
What I'm saying though there is that when
you are trying to approach a woman you
are SEXUALLY interested in, for the sake
of DATING her and getting to be her MAN,
then you better be in the sexual state when
approaching her.
It's ironic that the very thing that can help us,
(this sexual state of mind, which she is helping
you be in simply by her PRESENCE there) is
the thing that we HOLD BACK on as men, so
often.
We have been brainwashed to think
that this is somehow more attractive, to act
as if a woman was not a woman. It doesn't
make anybody happy, including women.
This doesn't mean that the TOPICS you
discuss with her should be sexual. No,
rather it means that your BODY LANGUAGE
will improve in the right way because of
your sexual state of mind.
2. CHANGE YOUR INTERNAL LANGUAGE
The key to being in a great state when you
meet a woman is to try to KEEP YOUR
STATE pretty damn good all year round.
And the way to DO this is to start to MONITOR
and CHANGE the language you use to THINK
even to YOURSELF.
So, for example, stop thinking of women as
"obstacles" or as "targets" who need to be
"gamed".
This language creates a very REAL internal
feeling that women are somehow inherently
DIFFICULT.
This is simply NOT true, although I'm
sure it often seems that way.
The reality is that just about every HUMAN BEING
is simply using whatever strategy they think works
best to SURVIVE. And some people have some
pretty destructive strategies, for others and them-
selves, and some people have fantastic ones that
help themselves and everyone else as well.
So learn to CATCH yourself using language that
creates a thought pattern of women being the
enemy.
Also, catch yourself using language that BEATS UP
on yourself- it's AMAZING how many times we
will say things like "what an IDIOT I am" or
"how could I screw up like this???" or even
things like "mann, get OUT of this place,
these women are for SURE thinking I'm
a loser" etc, etc, etc.
The reality is that this language is WRONG,
it's NOT the truth, but we keep on using it
again and again. And it only REINFORCES
limiting results, it only holds you BACK.
Listen, when you go to a movie that is
INSPIRING, someone ELSE has put the
effort forth to try to help YOU for just
a few bucks in the price of the ticket.
But why won't WE be an even BETTER
FRIEND to OURSELVES?????????
Why can't you ALLOW YOURSELF to
take a COMPLIMENT from yourself?
Why can't you allow yourself to speak
to yourself in a language that may
CHALLENGE you, but only challenge
you to be your BEST, rather than just
BEAT yourself up all the time?
CHANGE the language you use with
yourself.
In fact, use language with yourself that
creates FANTASTIC VISUALS as well.
So, for example, think to yourself not
just "I'm going to approach that woman"
but "I'm going to approach that woman
with the quiet calm and power of a
nuclear submarine" or "I'm going to
throw this fear of approaching women
into a special "MENTAL INCINERATOR"
and destroy that fear FOREVER- now
I honestly hope the WHOLE WORLD
is watching me on TV, because there
is no way I can 'screw up' as long as
I have been a MAN and taken serious
ACTION to chat to her."
3. YOU'RE IN THE SOLUTION
OR YOU'RE IN THE PROBLEM.
You have to make a CHOICE about your life
with women and your state of mind in general
as well.
No matter what your CHALLENGE is, it
is going to be two totally DIFFERENT
emotional experiences, and two totally
DIFFERENT realities as well in terms
of RESULTS, depending on ONE thing:
Are you taking actions toward the SOLUTION?
Or are you continuing to just wallow in the
PROBLEM??
It doesn't MATTER how far gone you think
you are, it doesn't matter how horrible you
feel, the reality is that as SOON as you
CHANGE TRACKS toward the SOLUTION,
you will feel MASSIVE CHANGE and you
will very soon start to see that your results
with women and your internal state is
IMPROVING for REAL.
The problem is that when we are in the wrong
state, it is almost PARALYZING. The
emotions of frustration and depression and
anger and fear are just like THICK SLUDGE
that gums up your entire works and makes
you feel like doing NOTHING towards
truly taking positive action to helping
yourself.
And THAT IS the greatest tragedy of all,
when in reality there is so much potential
so close but it SEEMS like it's so far away.
The moment you take ACTION, even if
it's just one BABY step, you send an indirect,
but CRUCIAL message to your brain that
you are in CONTROL and this in itself
BOOSTS your self-esteem and it begins
to LIBERATE all the awesome emotions
within you that not only feel so good but
also attract women.
And of course that makes you take
FURTHER actions of the right kind
that get you further results, etc, etc.
4. DON'T REPRESS NEGATIVE EMOTIONS
One of the biggest mistakes you can do for
your "inner game" in general is to REPRESS
all the negative emotions we feel.
As men, we have been wrongly conditioned
to think the best thing to do is always to
SHUT DOWN our emotions.
Now, this doesn't mean to act like a cry-baby
or a clown.
What it does mean is that when you feel
tremendous negative emotions, including
fear of approaching a woman, calling a
woman, escalating physically, or you feel
that you don't have the VALUE it takes
for this woman or for any particular woman,
then the best thing you can do is FEEEEL
the emotions in the following way:
A: Don't judge the emotions. Just feel them.
If you are feeling cold, or hot, or if your
chest muscles feel tight, just FEEL the
feelings. Don't label them as fear or
anger or pain or good or bad or anything.
Just FEEL the emotional sensations for
what they actually ARE and nothing else.
The PHYSICAL FEELINGS.
If you do this, if you just let the feelings
HAPPEN, you will notice something
wonderful- these negative emotions will
PASS THROUGH YOU and go AWAY.
They can't pass through you if you REPRESS
them. But if you just allow yourself to
RELAX, ironically enough, as you FEEL
these emotions without judging them,
they will then pass THROUGH you, allowing
you to be liberated again and allowing you
to unleash the infinite power of your inner
state to attract the women of your choice.
And if you are reading this right now and
would like to experience what life can be
like when you have CHOICE with women,
then I suggest you sign up for a bootcamp
with me as soon as possible. In bootcamp,
I will work with exclusively with you, and
train you in the REAL WORLD, including
approaching women in coffee shops, bookstores,
trendy lounges, and cafes.
It's simple: You will walk away from this training
with the skills to approach women anywhere and
get numbers, emails, and dates.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
And if you haven't taken advantage of my other
materials on how to meet, approach, and date the
best quality women on Earth, then do that now.
The place to start is my book, Get A Great Girl.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
And to learn how the most successful men on earth
WIN with women, business and life, go to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/win.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Do You Have To Be A Jerk To Get A Woman?
It's always cool to see guys actually
APPLYING what they learn and getting
the results they are looking for.
Lately, I've had the privilege
to see guys getting awesome results,
and the best part of all is that
these guys are all GREAT guys,
they are not jerks at all!
Being successful with women has
nothing to do with being a jerk
who bosses women around, and it
also has nothing to do with
being a pushover either-
success with women is about
having a dynamic personality.
ANYONE can learn to achieve
this personality and to make
that personality consistent
with who they really are.
There are tons of variations
of dynamic personalities.
Here's a recent letter:
***LETTER***
"Just wanted to let you know that
the girl I was talking about in the
email below, has been dating me for
two months now already!
To be honest, I never really
understood what you ment with
"If you give a girl the self-esteem
she deserves, she'll be yours".
Now I definitely understand.
I respect her, care for her and
help her, all together with not
"being a dog" and instead act
like a man. This combination is
incredibly powerful!!
I just got a text message from her
saying "you're the best thing that
ever happened to me"!
I would have of course never have
respected, cared and helped her
to this extent before I was sure
that she was a quality woman! But
I guess that speaks for itself after
having read all your material!
Good luck and we'll keep in touch.
Ciao!"
***MY COMMENTS***
Nothing better than hearing about
guys getting results by actually
combining the three key ingredients:
1. Screen for a high quality woman,
who is just as awesome inside as
she is on the outside.
2. Then, give her the awesome
gift of your developed, dynamic,
unstoppable personality that makes
life so much more fun and meaningful
for her to be around you.
3. Make her feel AMAZING
about HERSELF as well.
So many guys think it's about
jerks vs. nice guys, when really
the truth is that without the
dynamic personality, it doesn't
matter, it won't make a difference
if the guy is "nice" or "mean".
But when you have learned how
to develop yourself, and then
how to feel maximum self-esteem
in yourself, and you learn how
to give that to a woman as well,
then you're unstoppable.
And guys who are high self-esteem
are something much better than
"nice", they are giving from a
place of STRENGTH.
And if you'd like to be THAT
kind of man, then go to
http://www.getagreatgirl.com
IMMEDIATELY.
Till next time,
Michael Marks
APPLYING what they learn and getting
the results they are looking for.
Lately, I've had the privilege
to see guys getting awesome results,
and the best part of all is that
these guys are all GREAT guys,
they are not jerks at all!
Being successful with women has
nothing to do with being a jerk
who bosses women around, and it
also has nothing to do with
being a pushover either-
success with women is about
having a dynamic personality.
ANYONE can learn to achieve
this personality and to make
that personality consistent
with who they really are.
There are tons of variations
of dynamic personalities.
Here's a recent letter:
***LETTER***
"Just wanted to let you know that
the girl I was talking about in the
email below, has been dating me for
two months now already!
To be honest, I never really
understood what you ment with
"If you give a girl the self-esteem
she deserves, she'll be yours".
Now I definitely understand.
I respect her, care for her and
help her, all together with not
"being a dog" and instead act
like a man. This combination is
incredibly powerful!!
I just got a text message from her
saying "you're the best thing that
ever happened to me"!
I would have of course never have
respected, cared and helped her
to this extent before I was sure
that she was a quality woman! But
I guess that speaks for itself after
having read all your material!
Good luck and we'll keep in touch.
Ciao!"
***MY COMMENTS***
Nothing better than hearing about
guys getting results by actually
combining the three key ingredients:
1. Screen for a high quality woman,
who is just as awesome inside as
she is on the outside.
2. Then, give her the awesome
gift of your developed, dynamic,
unstoppable personality that makes
life so much more fun and meaningful
for her to be around you.
3. Make her feel AMAZING
about HERSELF as well.
So many guys think it's about
jerks vs. nice guys, when really
the truth is that without the
dynamic personality, it doesn't
matter, it won't make a difference
if the guy is "nice" or "mean".
But when you have learned how
to develop yourself, and then
how to feel maximum self-esteem
in yourself, and you learn how
to give that to a woman as well,
then you're unstoppable.
And guys who are high self-esteem
are something much better than
"nice", they are giving from a
place of STRENGTH.
And if you'd like to be THAT
kind of man, then go to
http://www.getagreatgirl.com
IMMEDIATELY.
Till next time,
Michael Marks
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Real World Advice For Attracting A Quality Woman
In the real world, meeting quality women
and attracting them has nothing to do
with pick up lines or putting on an act-
what it DOES involve is REAL insight into
how the mind works, so let's get straight
to some tips you can use TODAY!
1. USE THE PROPER EMOTIONAL FILTER
One of the most fantastic things is that you
can make almost ANYTHING work to
successfully start a conversation and get
a woman to want to chat with you, IF you
apply the right emotional filter to yourself.
What I mean by this, is that what you say
to a woman can be almost anything as long
as it comes from a place of ABUNDANCE
inside of you.
Think I'm exaggerating?
I'm not.
The reality is that there really are only two
possible driving forces behind every single
action that you or anyone else takes: And that
action is either coming from FEAR or it's
coming from LOVE.
Subconsciously, all humans can DETECT
where you are internally "coming from"
when you are chatting to them. Women
are especially good at detecting this.
So a woman can immediately TELL just
from the tone of your voice if you are coming
from a place of emotional ABUNDANCE
within yourself or if you are coming from
a place of SCARCITY.
If you feel scarcity, if you feel threatened,
if you feel you are a "total loser with women",
well then you will SHOW it in your tonality.
And humans tend to reflect back whatever
emotional state is being directed at them.
If you are feeling FEAR-related emotions,
you will make a woman feel fear as well,
and she will respond accordingly- she
will SHUT DOWN.
So the first thing to do is to REALIZE that
it's YOU who is creating a lot of the results
that you are getting- it's not just the women
you are chatting to. It's YOU. They are
reflecting back to you what you are giving
off.
One solution is to ALREADY BE IN STATE
long before you are chatting to a woman.
So BEFORE you even LEAVE the house,
you should already COMMIT yourself to
being in an emotional state of LOVE, of
GIVING, of ABUNDANCE, of security.
Practice this right NOW, in front of a
MIRROR. Say something like "hey, how're
you doin" and try packing in as much
feeling of EMOTIONAL ABUNDANCE
as possible into you VOICE.
This is not the same as shouting
or yelling, it's about packing
the positive emotions into your
voice, CONSCIOUSLY doing this
at first, again and again, in
the mirror.
This will CHANGE the way you actually
FEEL.
Love has nothing to do with being needy.
REAL love has to do with GIVING.
So REAL love has to do with thinking of
how you ALREADY have TONS of
abundance.
The truth is, you DO.
Everybody does.
The only thing that exists is LOVE and FEAR.
And you have a choice, everyone does.
If you choose fear, you will get BACK fear.
If you choose love, you will get that back as well.
Notice the expressions on your face CHANGE
in the mirror as you adopt a vocal tonality of
ABUNDANCE, of LOVE, in your voice
as you say even the simple words
"Hey, how're you doin".
This exercise is DECEPTIVELY simple-
it is simple but it is PROFOUND and
powerful as well, and it actually affects
you in a very COMPLEX way.
Say the word's "Hey, how're you doin"
over and over, looking in the mirror,
each time, trying to PACK IN MORE
EMOTIONAL ABUNDANCE, more
CONFIDENCE, more LOVE. And
remember that neediness is not love.
Neediness is taking, it is fear.
Take a look at your favorite singer as
they sing the lyrics to the emotional
HIGH POINTS of a POSITIVE SONG.
Notice the expression on their faces,
notice the effect it has on YOU the
listener.
It COMPELS you to JOIN the state of
mind that THAT person is in.
So just make sure that whatever you say
comes from a place of LOVE inside,
and not of fear.
Practice saying things from this
emotional standpoint- you can say
anything, what counts is the
emotional place deep within that
it's coming from. So EVERYTHING
you say and do must be funneled
through this filter,and it will
then work.
The other cool thing, is that when
you do this, it actually changes
your BRAIN PATTERNS so that you
actually come up with cooler
THINGS to say as well, as
you'll see when you do this
in real life.
This gets me to point number TWO:
2. WHOEVER IS STRONGER IN THEIR
EMOTIONAL STATE WILL DOMINATE
So what this means is that if you are only
half-assed about applying the above advice,
you will be STOMPED on because you
will not be making IMPACT on women,
rather women will be making all the
impact on YOU. And you will be subject
to whatever emotion they are feeling at
the moment- including the negative
emotion that YOU may be giving to
THEM.
So again, you have to be in the right state
BEFORE the moment arises, you have to
be ready BEFORE you see a woman you
want to chat with.
If you wait till you see a woman you
want to chat with, the moment can
be gone before you know it.
So do the mirror exercise BEFORE leaving
in the morning. Listen to empowering music
and MOVE to it before leaving the house.
Motion creates EMOTION.
POINT THREE:
3. ATTRACTIVE HUMOR IS JUST
CONFIDENCE TO THE EXTREME
There are all kinds of humor, but the
kind that works to attract a woman
is the kind that conveys WHAT YOU
ARE FEELING WITHIN IS INFINITE
POWER AND LOVE. And the WAY
to show this is to simply EXAGGERATE
anything POSITIVE about yourself
to the EXTREME.
There is very fine line between arrogance
and confidence, and yet it is a crucial
difference.
Arrogance thinks that you are BETTER
than everyone else. Confidence thinks
you are AWESOME and invites others
TO JOIN YOU at the top.
So, for example, let's say you are making
an online profile, and you're working on
your opening statement- something like
"Warning: Magical Genie Within"
That would prompt a lot of women to say
"hmmmmm, I wonder what that might be"
as they imagine what magical man might
be out there for them...and they'd want
to open your profile and read it.
It's even easier when approaching women
in real life, because rather than just relying
on words, you have your voice, your body
language, your clothing and accessories,
and the ability to interact back and forth
with her.
So you can tell a woman who is eating
in a bookstore, "Excuse me, there is
special policy here on eating, there is
NO eating here" then pause, and say
"Unless you give me some" with a smile.
Again, the humor here comes from your
sense of entitlement and power, and yet
it is clearly a joke, it's clearly not arrogance,
it's just you feeling super duper comfortable
in your own skin- when you REALLY feel
powerful, you actually chill out and can
joke around with WARMTH rather than
nastyness in your humor. Your tone of
voice also plays a key role in delivering
this with love and confidence and security
rather than fear or arrogance.
And if you're reading this right now and would
like to get the FULL PICTURE, then I suggest
you take my Real World Bootcamp. In this
program, I will show you one-on-one how
to master the skill of approaching and attracting
women in the real places where you find
women everyday- cafes, bookstores, coffee
shops, malls, you name it.
You will learn how to do all this in a way
that involves no lies, no tricks, no manipulation
of women.
This program lasts for an entire weekend,
and focuses on how to meet quality
women that are classy. This is not about
how to meet drunken women at the bar
or club. It's completely private and
exclusive, and one-on-one, and you
can find out more and how to register
by going to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
And if you haven't downloaded my book,
'Get A Great Girl', then definitely do that
now. This book is the only book in the
entire "dating field" community that focuses
on how to actually go about finding, meeting,
and attracting a fantastic woman that is a
genuine gem- a woman that would make for
a fantastic girlfriend.
It's the only book that also shows how to
KEEP the connection and attraction burning
strong LONG TERM.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
and attracting them has nothing to do
with pick up lines or putting on an act-
what it DOES involve is REAL insight into
how the mind works, so let's get straight
to some tips you can use TODAY!
1. USE THE PROPER EMOTIONAL FILTER
One of the most fantastic things is that you
can make almost ANYTHING work to
successfully start a conversation and get
a woman to want to chat with you, IF you
apply the right emotional filter to yourself.
What I mean by this, is that what you say
to a woman can be almost anything as long
as it comes from a place of ABUNDANCE
inside of you.
Think I'm exaggerating?
I'm not.
The reality is that there really are only two
possible driving forces behind every single
action that you or anyone else takes: And that
action is either coming from FEAR or it's
coming from LOVE.
Subconsciously, all humans can DETECT
where you are internally "coming from"
when you are chatting to them. Women
are especially good at detecting this.
So a woman can immediately TELL just
from the tone of your voice if you are coming
from a place of emotional ABUNDANCE
within yourself or if you are coming from
a place of SCARCITY.
If you feel scarcity, if you feel threatened,
if you feel you are a "total loser with women",
well then you will SHOW it in your tonality.
And humans tend to reflect back whatever
emotional state is being directed at them.
If you are feeling FEAR-related emotions,
you will make a woman feel fear as well,
and she will respond accordingly- she
will SHUT DOWN.
So the first thing to do is to REALIZE that
it's YOU who is creating a lot of the results
that you are getting- it's not just the women
you are chatting to. It's YOU. They are
reflecting back to you what you are giving
off.
One solution is to ALREADY BE IN STATE
long before you are chatting to a woman.
So BEFORE you even LEAVE the house,
you should already COMMIT yourself to
being in an emotional state of LOVE, of
GIVING, of ABUNDANCE, of security.
Practice this right NOW, in front of a
MIRROR. Say something like "hey, how're
you doin" and try packing in as much
feeling of EMOTIONAL ABUNDANCE
as possible into you VOICE.
This is not the same as shouting
or yelling, it's about packing
the positive emotions into your
voice, CONSCIOUSLY doing this
at first, again and again, in
the mirror.
This will CHANGE the way you actually
FEEL.
Love has nothing to do with being needy.
REAL love has to do with GIVING.
So REAL love has to do with thinking of
how you ALREADY have TONS of
abundance.
The truth is, you DO.
Everybody does.
The only thing that exists is LOVE and FEAR.
And you have a choice, everyone does.
If you choose fear, you will get BACK fear.
If you choose love, you will get that back as well.
Notice the expressions on your face CHANGE
in the mirror as you adopt a vocal tonality of
ABUNDANCE, of LOVE, in your voice
as you say even the simple words
"Hey, how're you doin".
This exercise is DECEPTIVELY simple-
it is simple but it is PROFOUND and
powerful as well, and it actually affects
you in a very COMPLEX way.
Say the word's "Hey, how're you doin"
over and over, looking in the mirror,
each time, trying to PACK IN MORE
EMOTIONAL ABUNDANCE, more
CONFIDENCE, more LOVE. And
remember that neediness is not love.
Neediness is taking, it is fear.
Take a look at your favorite singer as
they sing the lyrics to the emotional
HIGH POINTS of a POSITIVE SONG.
Notice the expression on their faces,
notice the effect it has on YOU the
listener.
It COMPELS you to JOIN the state of
mind that THAT person is in.
So just make sure that whatever you say
comes from a place of LOVE inside,
and not of fear.
Practice saying things from this
emotional standpoint- you can say
anything, what counts is the
emotional place deep within that
it's coming from. So EVERYTHING
you say and do must be funneled
through this filter,and it will
then work.
The other cool thing, is that when
you do this, it actually changes
your BRAIN PATTERNS so that you
actually come up with cooler
THINGS to say as well, as
you'll see when you do this
in real life.
This gets me to point number TWO:
2. WHOEVER IS STRONGER IN THEIR
EMOTIONAL STATE WILL DOMINATE
So what this means is that if you are only
half-assed about applying the above advice,
you will be STOMPED on because you
will not be making IMPACT on women,
rather women will be making all the
impact on YOU. And you will be subject
to whatever emotion they are feeling at
the moment- including the negative
emotion that YOU may be giving to
THEM.
So again, you have to be in the right state
BEFORE the moment arises, you have to
be ready BEFORE you see a woman you
want to chat with.
If you wait till you see a woman you
want to chat with, the moment can
be gone before you know it.
So do the mirror exercise BEFORE leaving
in the morning. Listen to empowering music
and MOVE to it before leaving the house.
Motion creates EMOTION.
POINT THREE:
3. ATTRACTIVE HUMOR IS JUST
CONFIDENCE TO THE EXTREME
There are all kinds of humor, but the
kind that works to attract a woman
is the kind that conveys WHAT YOU
ARE FEELING WITHIN IS INFINITE
POWER AND LOVE. And the WAY
to show this is to simply EXAGGERATE
anything POSITIVE about yourself
to the EXTREME.
There is very fine line between arrogance
and confidence, and yet it is a crucial
difference.
Arrogance thinks that you are BETTER
than everyone else. Confidence thinks
you are AWESOME and invites others
TO JOIN YOU at the top.
So, for example, let's say you are making
an online profile, and you're working on
your opening statement- something like
"Warning: Magical Genie Within"
That would prompt a lot of women to say
"hmmmmm, I wonder what that might be"
as they imagine what magical man might
be out there for them...and they'd want
to open your profile and read it.
It's even easier when approaching women
in real life, because rather than just relying
on words, you have your voice, your body
language, your clothing and accessories,
and the ability to interact back and forth
with her.
So you can tell a woman who is eating
in a bookstore, "Excuse me, there is
special policy here on eating, there is
NO eating here" then pause, and say
"Unless you give me some" with a smile.
Again, the humor here comes from your
sense of entitlement and power, and yet
it is clearly a joke, it's clearly not arrogance,
it's just you feeling super duper comfortable
in your own skin- when you REALLY feel
powerful, you actually chill out and can
joke around with WARMTH rather than
nastyness in your humor. Your tone of
voice also plays a key role in delivering
this with love and confidence and security
rather than fear or arrogance.
And if you're reading this right now and would
like to get the FULL PICTURE, then I suggest
you take my Real World Bootcamp. In this
program, I will show you one-on-one how
to master the skill of approaching and attracting
women in the real places where you find
women everyday- cafes, bookstores, coffee
shops, malls, you name it.
You will learn how to do all this in a way
that involves no lies, no tricks, no manipulation
of women.
This program lasts for an entire weekend,
and focuses on how to meet quality
women that are classy. This is not about
how to meet drunken women at the bar
or club. It's completely private and
exclusive, and one-on-one, and you
can find out more and how to register
by going to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
And if you haven't downloaded my book,
'Get A Great Girl', then definitely do that
now. This book is the only book in the
entire "dating field" community that focuses
on how to actually go about finding, meeting,
and attracting a fantastic woman that is a
genuine gem- a woman that would make for
a fantastic girlfriend.
It's the only book that also shows how to
KEEP the connection and attraction burning
strong LONG TERM.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
How To Get Your Dream Girl
Since day one, I have always been consistent-
getting that dream woman- this is what it's
all about.
I'm talking about the kind of fantastic
woman who is a total package and would
make for an incredible girlfriend.
This is very different than just getting
numbers of drunk girls at bars and clubs.
This is about the REAL THING.
Whereas party girls are all about you
acting over the top, getting a quality
woman is all about you developing
deeper and deeper levels of connection,
starting from the light fluff stuff
and then working your way to a
deeper connection than anything she
has had with anyone before.
So let's cut straight to the chase on some
GOLDEN insights on how to get that dream woman.
ONE:
Have you ever heard that EYE CONTACT is important?
Well, it is, but if you don't understand the REASON
for why it's important, then you will not do it properly,
and when it comes to attracting a woman, HOW you
do something counts just as much as WHAT you do.
So the problem is that many men have heard that eye
contact with a woman is important, but they have
been told it's because this shows CONFIDENCE,
it shows that you are not afraid, etc, etc, etc.
Well, this is only the TIP of the iceberg actually.
The FULL TRUTH is that a woman wants to be
SEEN FOR WHO SHE REALLY IS, not just
for her superficial self. And the eyes are the
windows to the soul, so to speak. If you don't
look her in the eyes when you speak, you are
NEVER truly allowing yourself to see her
for who she is.
Before you think this is just a superficial thing,
think about this: Ever notice how hard it is to
LIE to someone when you are looking them
straight in the eyes?
There is a feeling of HONESTY when two people
are truly seeing "eye to eye" - this is why the
phrase "seeing eye to eye" to describe two people
in harmony, developed over the years.
So the reality is that by giving a woman eye contact,
and looking deep into her eyes, you are not just
SHOWING YOUR OWN value and confidence,
but you are also GIVING so much more as well.
See? You are actually GIVING in a way that
is SEXY and ATTRACTIVE and CHARISMATIC.
The OTHER element here that makes the eye
contact even MORE powerful is your ability to
be able to ABSORB the eye contact she is giving
YOU. When you feel unworthy, you tend to look
away, and yet that makes a woman feel that you
are somehow UNTRUSTWORTHY.
She is feeling "why is this guy looking away from me?"
and "What is he hiding?"
So lack of eye contact also disrupts the flow of
TRUST, which is sooo important in creating
that all important CONNECTION with a woman
so she can unleash her sexuality and let go with
you. Without that trust and connection, it's never
going to be a strong sexual connection, that's for
sure. She will be very limited, because she can't
truly let go of her inhibitions with you.
So, now that you understand the REAL reasons
for eye contact, you will do it not in a HARSH
way, but in a GIVING, and LOVING WAY.
Yes, this is TRULY the way of the confident,
MAN, the man who is flowing with ABUNDANCE
of charisma, confidence, who knows he has value.
THIS is the way to behave. Do NOT think of
eye contact just as some type of display of your
ability to show that you can confront her, eye
to eye. Instead, think of it as your ability to
show that you want to see DEEP INTO HER
IDENTITY, for who she really is.
Remember, emotions are not logical- and though
this looking into her eyes thing might not TOTALLY
seem logical, the reality is that it FEELS very
powerful, just think of how it feels when a woman
looks deep into YOUR eyes, and how hard it is
to not look away when she is sooooooo amazingly
beautiful, if you are not used to it. So get USED
to it, and start learning to keep eye contact.
If you are new to all this, practice when walking
on the street, keep eye contact with a woman,
and let HER be the first one to look away.
When you look into a woman's eyes, you make
her feel like you are looking into her for who
she really is, beyond just her body, and the
reality is that you will FEEL this way too,
so you really are helping BOTH of you
to see each other on an emotionally deep
level as well. So be a GIVER and do this.
In our crazy culture, we're conditioned to do
anything EXCEPT make eye contact, as if
was WRONG to develop this powerful of
an emotional connection to another person,
when in reality if we all did this we might
have a more CONNECTED society, but
you can take advantage of the fact that
no one ELSE does this and be the man who
is that much more SPECIAL and charismatic
with a woman because you are one of the
few men who actually DO make that eye
contact.
TWO:
And here's ANOTHER important distinction
to make--the whole idea of making cocky
jokes with a woman, it's not necessary, and
when it DOES work, it ONLY works when
you are doing it through the FILTER of
being a GIVER, not a taker...A woman senses
this as TRUE confidence...
Let me give you an example- if I make fun
of a woman, I will do it in a way where it
is absolutely clear that what I am saying
CANNOT BE TRUE. So if she is an
A+ student and gorgeous, then I can tease
her for having no future, and she will
LAUGH and love it.
Because it shows that I am just playing with
her. But to actually say things that ENDANGER
a woman's sense of self-esteem is INSANE
and will ALWAYS lead to problems, because
even if a woman doesn't IMMEDIATELY
strike back at you for this, eventually she
WILL. GUARANTEED.
And the few times she doesn't strike back at you?
That's because she has already determined that
the "tactic" was a result of insecurity and low
self-esteem, that the guy felt he needed to do
that, so she ignores it, makes the guy feel
like he said something brilliant or she ignores
it, (out of pity for the guy with low self esteem)
then goes on to another man and forgets
the guy with the insult forever.
Having to resort to insults to a woman to show
that you are not "under her thumb" would be
a very PRIMITIVE way of showing that she
is not controlling your thoughts or emotions
and that she is not "all that"...
This is why I am totally against the idea of
doing this, contrary to dating television shows
that suggest that these insults are the way to
get a woman's interest. This kind of info
is almost like a conspiracy, as it SOUNDS
interesting, but actually HARMS guys'
results with women.
THREE:
And here's ANOTHER golden tip- the
whole idea of WOMEN TESTING MEN--
is completely misunderstood.
If women so naturally create tests, to determine
if you are "man enough", then does it make sense
to try to FAKE your way through her testing
system by learning "lines" or learning how
ACT arrogant or trying to be arrogant????
Well, that's what most "experts" suggest
You do, to act arrogant or to show you
are in power.
Do you really think that such a powerful primal
tool that has lasted for millions of years in a
woman's brain could so easily be overpowered??
NO, the REAL way to pass a woman's test is
to actually BE the man.. not how to PRETEND
to not be "under her spell" etc,
And how do you do this? You do this by
understanding first of all what REAL confidence is,
what the REAL reason behind all these
"attractive behaviors" is...so for example
the EYE contact for is not to so much to
show that you are NOT AFRAID of her,
but to show that you are confident enough
to want to TRULY UNDERSTAND her, that
you want to see her for who she really is...
and the eye contact is also extremely
impressive in a culture that says "no
eye contact" a culture that says you
should just "leave me ALONE..."
when deep down people CRAVE
a feeling of a special CONNECTION,
and almost NO ONE is getting that
connection!!!
So, when you actually DO all these things,
that are actually a form of GIVING, guess
what happens? You got it--a woman then
sees there is NO NEED to test you in the
FIRST place!!!!! If a woman is testing
You all the time, then either she is the
Wrong woman, or you are DOING things
to MAKE her need to test you!!!!!
And definitely, following the "give her
the arrogant behavior" and "sugar coated
insults" and other behaviors that show
untrustworthiness and shady character
will all make her feel the NEED to test
you for all sorts of things, from your
manliness to your sense of integrity
and honesty.
What you have just read is just a GLIMPSE
into a whole other dimension that you can
be living in with the woman of your dreams.
This isn't about immature pick-up lines.
It's about becoming a stronger man, and
showing that in your interaction with
her, from the moment you approach her
till long after physical intimacy as well.
If you want to get a fantastic woman,
and get started TONIGHT, then I suggest
you download my book, "Get A Great Girl",
IMMEDIATELY, at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
For the in-depth advanced levels on how
to approach women anywhere and how to
take things to an intimate level and
beyond, I suggest you get my Mastery
Program at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
For my Real World Bootcamp, go to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
getting that dream woman- this is what it's
all about.
I'm talking about the kind of fantastic
woman who is a total package and would
make for an incredible girlfriend.
This is very different than just getting
numbers of drunk girls at bars and clubs.
This is about the REAL THING.
Whereas party girls are all about you
acting over the top, getting a quality
woman is all about you developing
deeper and deeper levels of connection,
starting from the light fluff stuff
and then working your way to a
deeper connection than anything she
has had with anyone before.
So let's cut straight to the chase on some
GOLDEN insights on how to get that dream woman.
ONE:
Have you ever heard that EYE CONTACT is important?
Well, it is, but if you don't understand the REASON
for why it's important, then you will not do it properly,
and when it comes to attracting a woman, HOW you
do something counts just as much as WHAT you do.
So the problem is that many men have heard that eye
contact with a woman is important, but they have
been told it's because this shows CONFIDENCE,
it shows that you are not afraid, etc, etc, etc.
Well, this is only the TIP of the iceberg actually.
The FULL TRUTH is that a woman wants to be
SEEN FOR WHO SHE REALLY IS, not just
for her superficial self. And the eyes are the
windows to the soul, so to speak. If you don't
look her in the eyes when you speak, you are
NEVER truly allowing yourself to see her
for who she is.
Before you think this is just a superficial thing,
think about this: Ever notice how hard it is to
LIE to someone when you are looking them
straight in the eyes?
There is a feeling of HONESTY when two people
are truly seeing "eye to eye" - this is why the
phrase "seeing eye to eye" to describe two people
in harmony, developed over the years.
So the reality is that by giving a woman eye contact,
and looking deep into her eyes, you are not just
SHOWING YOUR OWN value and confidence,
but you are also GIVING so much more as well.
See? You are actually GIVING in a way that
is SEXY and ATTRACTIVE and CHARISMATIC.
The OTHER element here that makes the eye
contact even MORE powerful is your ability to
be able to ABSORB the eye contact she is giving
YOU. When you feel unworthy, you tend to look
away, and yet that makes a woman feel that you
are somehow UNTRUSTWORTHY.
She is feeling "why is this guy looking away from me?"
and "What is he hiding?"
So lack of eye contact also disrupts the flow of
TRUST, which is sooo important in creating
that all important CONNECTION with a woman
so she can unleash her sexuality and let go with
you. Without that trust and connection, it's never
going to be a strong sexual connection, that's for
sure. She will be very limited, because she can't
truly let go of her inhibitions with you.
So, now that you understand the REAL reasons
for eye contact, you will do it not in a HARSH
way, but in a GIVING, and LOVING WAY.
Yes, this is TRULY the way of the confident,
MAN, the man who is flowing with ABUNDANCE
of charisma, confidence, who knows he has value.
THIS is the way to behave. Do NOT think of
eye contact just as some type of display of your
ability to show that you can confront her, eye
to eye. Instead, think of it as your ability to
show that you want to see DEEP INTO HER
IDENTITY, for who she really is.
Remember, emotions are not logical- and though
this looking into her eyes thing might not TOTALLY
seem logical, the reality is that it FEELS very
powerful, just think of how it feels when a woman
looks deep into YOUR eyes, and how hard it is
to not look away when she is sooooooo amazingly
beautiful, if you are not used to it. So get USED
to it, and start learning to keep eye contact.
If you are new to all this, practice when walking
on the street, keep eye contact with a woman,
and let HER be the first one to look away.
When you look into a woman's eyes, you make
her feel like you are looking into her for who
she really is, beyond just her body, and the
reality is that you will FEEL this way too,
so you really are helping BOTH of you
to see each other on an emotionally deep
level as well. So be a GIVER and do this.
In our crazy culture, we're conditioned to do
anything EXCEPT make eye contact, as if
was WRONG to develop this powerful of
an emotional connection to another person,
when in reality if we all did this we might
have a more CONNECTED society, but
you can take advantage of the fact that
no one ELSE does this and be the man who
is that much more SPECIAL and charismatic
with a woman because you are one of the
few men who actually DO make that eye
contact.
TWO:
And here's ANOTHER important distinction
to make--the whole idea of making cocky
jokes with a woman, it's not necessary, and
when it DOES work, it ONLY works when
you are doing it through the FILTER of
being a GIVER, not a taker...A woman senses
this as TRUE confidence...
Let me give you an example- if I make fun
of a woman, I will do it in a way where it
is absolutely clear that what I am saying
CANNOT BE TRUE. So if she is an
A+ student and gorgeous, then I can tease
her for having no future, and she will
LAUGH and love it.
Because it shows that I am just playing with
her. But to actually say things that ENDANGER
a woman's sense of self-esteem is INSANE
and will ALWAYS lead to problems, because
even if a woman doesn't IMMEDIATELY
strike back at you for this, eventually she
WILL. GUARANTEED.
And the few times she doesn't strike back at you?
That's because she has already determined that
the "tactic" was a result of insecurity and low
self-esteem, that the guy felt he needed to do
that, so she ignores it, makes the guy feel
like he said something brilliant or she ignores
it, (out of pity for the guy with low self esteem)
then goes on to another man and forgets
the guy with the insult forever.
Having to resort to insults to a woman to show
that you are not "under her thumb" would be
a very PRIMITIVE way of showing that she
is not controlling your thoughts or emotions
and that she is not "all that"...
This is why I am totally against the idea of
doing this, contrary to dating television shows
that suggest that these insults are the way to
get a woman's interest. This kind of info
is almost like a conspiracy, as it SOUNDS
interesting, but actually HARMS guys'
results with women.
THREE:
And here's ANOTHER golden tip- the
whole idea of WOMEN TESTING MEN--
is completely misunderstood.
If women so naturally create tests, to determine
if you are "man enough", then does it make sense
to try to FAKE your way through her testing
system by learning "lines" or learning how
ACT arrogant or trying to be arrogant????
Well, that's what most "experts" suggest
You do, to act arrogant or to show you
are in power.
Do you really think that such a powerful primal
tool that has lasted for millions of years in a
woman's brain could so easily be overpowered??
NO, the REAL way to pass a woman's test is
to actually BE the man.. not how to PRETEND
to not be "under her spell" etc,
And how do you do this? You do this by
understanding first of all what REAL confidence is,
what the REAL reason behind all these
"attractive behaviors" is...so for example
the EYE contact for is not to so much to
show that you are NOT AFRAID of her,
but to show that you are confident enough
to want to TRULY UNDERSTAND her, that
you want to see her for who she really is...
and the eye contact is also extremely
impressive in a culture that says "no
eye contact" a culture that says you
should just "leave me ALONE..."
when deep down people CRAVE
a feeling of a special CONNECTION,
and almost NO ONE is getting that
connection!!!
So, when you actually DO all these things,
that are actually a form of GIVING, guess
what happens? You got it--a woman then
sees there is NO NEED to test you in the
FIRST place!!!!! If a woman is testing
You all the time, then either she is the
Wrong woman, or you are DOING things
to MAKE her need to test you!!!!!
And definitely, following the "give her
the arrogant behavior" and "sugar coated
insults" and other behaviors that show
untrustworthiness and shady character
will all make her feel the NEED to test
you for all sorts of things, from your
manliness to your sense of integrity
and honesty.
What you have just read is just a GLIMPSE
into a whole other dimension that you can
be living in with the woman of your dreams.
This isn't about immature pick-up lines.
It's about becoming a stronger man, and
showing that in your interaction with
her, from the moment you approach her
till long after physical intimacy as well.
If you want to get a fantastic woman,
and get started TONIGHT, then I suggest
you download my book, "Get A Great Girl",
IMMEDIATELY, at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
For the in-depth advanced levels on how
to approach women anywhere and how to
take things to an intimate level and
beyond, I suggest you get my Mastery
Program at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
For my Real World Bootcamp, go to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
Be The Man, Not The Manipulator
I'm not sure if you have ever been hurt along the
way to trying to meet a fantastic woman, but if
you have, then I can share some awesome news
with you, and some really powerful tips for
getting a great woman.
Let's get right to it:
1. THE PAST DOES NOT EQUAL THE FUTURE
If a woman in the past treated you horribly, this
does not mean that all women are this way. In our
human desire to AVOID pain, we often learn the
WRONG lessons from the past.
So for example, if a woman mistreated us, then
we as men often try to get the 'upper hand' by
learning 'player' or 'pick up artist' tactics or
'control' tactics that boil down to things like
pretending you are not interested or even
being cold or cruel, or by alternating between
being 'hot' and 'cold', showing interest then
showing lack of interest, etc.
This same 'game' is often played by women who
have been hurt by men as well.
The bottom line is that these games boil down
to MANIPULATION. This is the very OPPOSITE
of being THE MAN, because "The Game' is the
product of INSECURITY and the product of
FEAR.
The key is to become a better MAN, not
a better MANIPULATOR.
All manipulative tactics ultimately results in
something called MUTUALLY ASSURED
DESTRUCTION, or MAD.
So manipulating a woman will result in the
nuclear destruction of your relationship
or attraction between each other.
So too, a woman manipulating you will result
in MAD - Mutally Assured Destruction.
It's too bad that so many men and women
are ignorant of this, but the wise men and
women who appreciate this fact are able
to APPRECIATE the power of trust and
integrity and love, and no matter how
badly they have been hurt in the past,
they have learned that the answer is
NOT to manipulate each other- for
it always leads to MAD in the end.
You will find love again, you will find
a fantasic woman, but you must take
this giant step of maturity and emotional
growth and courage.
You must become THE MAN in the
most true and deep sense.
2. THIS DOES NOT MEAN TO BE A DOORMAT
Of course, being good to a woman does not mean
that you should allow any woman to abuse you.
In fact, if you accept abuse, you have to take
responsibility for it, since no one but you allows
yourself to be abused. You have to be strong
enough to move ON from the wrong woman
so that you can find the RIGHT woman.
This leads me to my NEXT point:
3. THE POWER OF NO
The power of NO is actually the title of a book
as well. What it means is that you have to
realize that NO can often be a very POSITIVE
thing.
So, saying NO to the WRONG woman, means
the chance to say YES to the RIGHT woman.
If you say YES to the wrong woman, you are
going to be wasting your energy and focus
and this means you will be in effect saying
NO to the RIGHT woman.
So, learn to say NO to the things that are
NOT what you want.
Don't let WEAKNESS make you say YES
to the WRONG things. Saying yes to the
wrong things means you will be distracted
and not even SEE the opportunities for the
RIGHT things, the right woman, the right
life, etc.
This also includes YOUR development
as a man who is truly congruent and who
is strong, passionate about integrity, and
who is inspiring- so this means saying
NO to the WRONG types of music,
NO to the wrong types of MOVIES,
NO to the wrong types of MESSAGES.
If you bombard yourself with the message
that women are all a certain negative way,
that will filter your perception and make
you see things in a very distorted way.
So you can see how certain types of
music might not be productive.
But if you say NO to the pick up artist
messages, if you say NO to the manipulator
stuff, you are saying YES to being a
better MAN, the kind of man that attracts
a great WOMAN.
If you bombard yourself with messages
that say you are not worthy or that you
are not enough, you will FEEL that way,
so you can see how certain men's
magazines that try to constantly make you
feel insecure would only harm you.
On the other hand, by saying NO to this
stuff, you can then make CONSCIOUS
choices to see the RIGHT movies,
the right music, the right books,
etc.
I saw a FANTASTIC film at the theatre
called "Earth" and it was inspiring, it was
a documentary about nature and how
majestic the natural beauty of Earth
is, including the natural struggle of
how animals go about their daily
survival.
I'd way rather listen to "Scarborough
Fair" than 99% of what is on the
radio. I'm not telling you what
to watch or listen to or read, but
I am saying that YOU should
be conscious and make informed
decisions of what you take into
your mind- it's no different and
no less important than what you
take into your stomach as food.
It's the food of your MIND.
In life you will constantly have CHOICES,
but most people don't even REALIZE this.
They end up DOING things and ACCEPTING
things because they aren't even AWARE of
what is going on- for example, they have
no idea how harmful the wrong messages
and wrong entertainment and wrong
environments are.
But the reality is that no one is FORCING
you to do things, or accept things, or listen
to the wrong messages.
In religion, myth, and folklore, you ever
notice how there is a certain common thread,
which is that nobody MAKES you do
anything- sure there may be the "villain"
the "snake" the "seductress" etc, etc,
but the lesson they keep on trying to
hammer home is that it is WE ourselves
who must make the right decisions.
The fact that every culture on Earth and
every civilization has come up with very
similar stories and mythologies (see
Joseph Campbell's "The Hero With
A Thousand Faces") is a hint to a universal
truth: To live a better life, we have to learn
what to say NO to, and what to say YES to.
So, for example, any time you feel the temptation
to do something that goes against your principles
just to impress a woman, realize this is TEST
for YOURSELF- this is your chance to prove
to YOURSELF that you are the MAN.
Realize that doing ANYTHING that goes against
your principles, just to impress a woman, will
only attract the WRONG woman. And by
NOT giving into this, you will become even
STRONGER in the right ways, which will
make you stand out that much clearer from
all the other wrong guys when you might
the RIGHT woman.
She will see that you are absolutely clear on
your values and that you are exactly the kind
of man she has been looking for.
This leads to my next point:
4. SCREEN FOR THE RIGHT
QUALITIES IN A WOMAN
To me, it's never been about dating tons of
women, or getting "notches" on bedposts.
It's always been about searching for that
super high quality, magical combination of
traits that makes for a great woman.
If you allow tons of the WRONG women
into your life, you will pollute your mind
and emotions and you will require a longer
emotional detox process to clean it all
up so you can be READY for the right
woman.
Too many guys are so focused on getting a woman
into bed, it's as if these women are already perfect
without even being checked out personality-wise.
When "checking out" a woman, don't just check
out her body, check out her personality and her
values. Check out how kind she is, check out
her compassion, check out her strength of values,
check out how disciplined she is, check out
how strongly she is committed to doing the
right thing, check out if she is willing to
be a true PARTNER or just looking for
you to do everything.
Check out how strongly she is able to
RESIST the pressure of the crazy values
preached by many people out there.
Dating is important, so that you PREVENT
yourself from getting into a relationship
with the wrong woman. Think of
dating as a SECURITY check where
you are SCREENING to prevent the
wrong woman or women from getting
into your MIND and your EMOTIONS.
Dating is about finding out who this woman
is INTERNALLY and emotionally.
5. GET INTO THE RIGHT STATE
There are all kinds of ways of getting into
the right emotional state so you can be
at your best when approaching a woman
and having a conversation with her.
The best way for you to get into the right
emotional state is to physically DO something,
because when your body MOVES, you actually
change your emotions. Motion creates emotion.
And to be even more precise, the best actions
to do are the things that you BELIEVE in.
So let's say you believe in charity, then
go out and FIND someone to give a buck
to. You will FEEL better and you will
also be CONGRUENT to the right values,
on a subconscious lever you will be showing
this stuff through tiny subtleties in your
demeanor. It's almost as if a woman will
be able to read your mind and know what
kind of person you are--all because you
will be in the congruent emotional state
to what you just DID recently.
If you believe in HEALTH and vitality,
you can go WORK OUT and approach
women after.
If you love music, then listen to your favourite
music and MOVE to it. It will change your
STATE, there is no way you can be in
a negative state when moving to music
you love. You don't have to even call
this 'dancing' what counts is the
NATURAL MOVEMENT that it
inspires in you.
You can do all the above, you can do
something different, but the key is to
take PHYSICAL action and DO it.
Ever notice how the best singers don't just
say the words but truly put their heart and
soul into the song? They make the words
dance on their tongues, they make the
words soar with emotion into the air.
They aren't just trying to get the song
over with, they are milking every last
word and syllable and having pleasure
and fun with it.
And when you talk with a woman,
don't talk about things that you don't
care about- it will be lifeless and boring.
And don't fake it either- instead, talk
about positive things and fun things
that you really DO care about. And
even MORE importantly, LISTEN
with genuine INTEREST in wanting
to know more about this person
rather than just wanting to get this
person's number or anything else.
6. GET A LIFE YOU ARE PASSIONATE ABOUT
Too many guys are just trying to learn to
FAKE being a cool guy with women.
It's not about being anything with women,
it's about being the best MAN you can be.
So when I hear about guys who are learning
from "pick up artist" types who teach them
to pretend they are busy, i.e. "after you
get the woman's number, make sure you
tell her you can't meet her that night
because you have plans- this will show
her you have a life and that you are hard
to get" it really makes no sense, since
the truth is you really SHOULD be a
man with a plan, a man with things on
his plate, with meaningful goals.
This way, you never have to PRETEND
you are busy with things, and you also
actually DO have things to talk about
that you care about, that are positive
and interesting, and these things also
help give you perspectives that you
can lend to helping HER perspectives
widen as well.
So for example, if you are talking to
her about some book she is reading,
and she tells you something about
ancient history or the character in
the book or the story or whatever,
you will have RICH PERSPECTIVES
and thoughts that you can SHARE
with her as well on the very thing
she is talking about, and you can
also help her see that you UNDERSTAND
her and that you can relate to what
she is saying.
Learning 'pick up lines' and learning to
pretend things like the dating gurus and
pick up artists like to do, is no way to develop
a powerful connection and a powerful
attraction from a woman to you.
7. HOW WOULD YOU BEHAVE IF
YOU RESPECTED YOURSELF TO
THE MAX?
I say this because it's so easy to think
that you are LESS than you really are.
Forget about women for one sec- this
has to do with YOU, not women:
How would you behave and speak and
carry yourself if YOU knew you were
worth a BILLION BUCKS?
Would there be DOUBT in your voice?
Would there be weakness and apology
constantly in your voice?
How would you respect your own TIME
if you knew it was DAMN VALUABLE?
How would you WALK and hold yourself
if you knew you TRULY MATTERED on
this Earth?
Start walking, breathing, and making
DECISIONS in your life based on the
fact that you ARE worthy.
If you DON'T do this, you will NEVER
even GET to the point where you can
SEE just how MASSIVELY this affects
your actual RESULTS in the real world
in every way- in business, with women,
with friends, family, etc.
And if you are reading this right now, and
are serious about meeting and attracting
the RIGHT woman, a woman you are nuts
about who is also nuts about you, then
I seriously suggest you take advantage
of my live coaching- whether you want
coaching on how to approach women,
how to make the date go smoothly,
or how to improve the relationship,
I can help you get there in the fastest
most efficient way possible.
To find out about my live coaching, go to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/PrivateCoaching.html
And if you haven't yet downloaded my book,
'Get A Great Girl,' then definitely do that now.
This book will lay down the foundation you
need for meeting and attracting a woman
who is the 'real thing', and it's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
Till next time.
Michael Marks
P.S. To check out all my programs on meeting
and attracting the RIGHT woman, go to:
http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
way to trying to meet a fantastic woman, but if
you have, then I can share some awesome news
with you, and some really powerful tips for
getting a great woman.
Let's get right to it:
1. THE PAST DOES NOT EQUAL THE FUTURE
If a woman in the past treated you horribly, this
does not mean that all women are this way. In our
human desire to AVOID pain, we often learn the
WRONG lessons from the past.
So for example, if a woman mistreated us, then
we as men often try to get the 'upper hand' by
learning 'player' or 'pick up artist' tactics or
'control' tactics that boil down to things like
pretending you are not interested or even
being cold or cruel, or by alternating between
being 'hot' and 'cold', showing interest then
showing lack of interest, etc.
This same 'game' is often played by women who
have been hurt by men as well.
The bottom line is that these games boil down
to MANIPULATION. This is the very OPPOSITE
of being THE MAN, because "The Game' is the
product of INSECURITY and the product of
FEAR.
The key is to become a better MAN, not
a better MANIPULATOR.
All manipulative tactics ultimately results in
something called MUTUALLY ASSURED
DESTRUCTION, or MAD.
So manipulating a woman will result in the
nuclear destruction of your relationship
or attraction between each other.
So too, a woman manipulating you will result
in MAD - Mutally Assured Destruction.
It's too bad that so many men and women
are ignorant of this, but the wise men and
women who appreciate this fact are able
to APPRECIATE the power of trust and
integrity and love, and no matter how
badly they have been hurt in the past,
they have learned that the answer is
NOT to manipulate each other- for
it always leads to MAD in the end.
You will find love again, you will find
a fantasic woman, but you must take
this giant step of maturity and emotional
growth and courage.
You must become THE MAN in the
most true and deep sense.
2. THIS DOES NOT MEAN TO BE A DOORMAT
Of course, being good to a woman does not mean
that you should allow any woman to abuse you.
In fact, if you accept abuse, you have to take
responsibility for it, since no one but you allows
yourself to be abused. You have to be strong
enough to move ON from the wrong woman
so that you can find the RIGHT woman.
This leads me to my NEXT point:
3. THE POWER OF NO
The power of NO is actually the title of a book
as well. What it means is that you have to
realize that NO can often be a very POSITIVE
thing.
So, saying NO to the WRONG woman, means
the chance to say YES to the RIGHT woman.
If you say YES to the wrong woman, you are
going to be wasting your energy and focus
and this means you will be in effect saying
NO to the RIGHT woman.
So, learn to say NO to the things that are
NOT what you want.
Don't let WEAKNESS make you say YES
to the WRONG things. Saying yes to the
wrong things means you will be distracted
and not even SEE the opportunities for the
RIGHT things, the right woman, the right
life, etc.
This also includes YOUR development
as a man who is truly congruent and who
is strong, passionate about integrity, and
who is inspiring- so this means saying
NO to the WRONG types of music,
NO to the wrong types of MOVIES,
NO to the wrong types of MESSAGES.
If you bombard yourself with the message
that women are all a certain negative way,
that will filter your perception and make
you see things in a very distorted way.
So you can see how certain types of
music might not be productive.
But if you say NO to the pick up artist
messages, if you say NO to the manipulator
stuff, you are saying YES to being a
better MAN, the kind of man that attracts
a great WOMAN.
If you bombard yourself with messages
that say you are not worthy or that you
are not enough, you will FEEL that way,
so you can see how certain men's
magazines that try to constantly make you
feel insecure would only harm you.
On the other hand, by saying NO to this
stuff, you can then make CONSCIOUS
choices to see the RIGHT movies,
the right music, the right books,
etc.
I saw a FANTASTIC film at the theatre
called "Earth" and it was inspiring, it was
a documentary about nature and how
majestic the natural beauty of Earth
is, including the natural struggle of
how animals go about their daily
survival.
I'd way rather listen to "Scarborough
Fair" than 99% of what is on the
radio. I'm not telling you what
to watch or listen to or read, but
I am saying that YOU should
be conscious and make informed
decisions of what you take into
your mind- it's no different and
no less important than what you
take into your stomach as food.
It's the food of your MIND.
In life you will constantly have CHOICES,
but most people don't even REALIZE this.
They end up DOING things and ACCEPTING
things because they aren't even AWARE of
what is going on- for example, they have
no idea how harmful the wrong messages
and wrong entertainment and wrong
environments are.
But the reality is that no one is FORCING
you to do things, or accept things, or listen
to the wrong messages.
In religion, myth, and folklore, you ever
notice how there is a certain common thread,
which is that nobody MAKES you do
anything- sure there may be the "villain"
the "snake" the "seductress" etc, etc,
but the lesson they keep on trying to
hammer home is that it is WE ourselves
who must make the right decisions.
The fact that every culture on Earth and
every civilization has come up with very
similar stories and mythologies (see
Joseph Campbell's "The Hero With
A Thousand Faces") is a hint to a universal
truth: To live a better life, we have to learn
what to say NO to, and what to say YES to.
So, for example, any time you feel the temptation
to do something that goes against your principles
just to impress a woman, realize this is TEST
for YOURSELF- this is your chance to prove
to YOURSELF that you are the MAN.
Realize that doing ANYTHING that goes against
your principles, just to impress a woman, will
only attract the WRONG woman. And by
NOT giving into this, you will become even
STRONGER in the right ways, which will
make you stand out that much clearer from
all the other wrong guys when you might
the RIGHT woman.
She will see that you are absolutely clear on
your values and that you are exactly the kind
of man she has been looking for.
This leads to my next point:
4. SCREEN FOR THE RIGHT
QUALITIES IN A WOMAN
To me, it's never been about dating tons of
women, or getting "notches" on bedposts.
It's always been about searching for that
super high quality, magical combination of
traits that makes for a great woman.
If you allow tons of the WRONG women
into your life, you will pollute your mind
and emotions and you will require a longer
emotional detox process to clean it all
up so you can be READY for the right
woman.
Too many guys are so focused on getting a woman
into bed, it's as if these women are already perfect
without even being checked out personality-wise.
When "checking out" a woman, don't just check
out her body, check out her personality and her
values. Check out how kind she is, check out
her compassion, check out her strength of values,
check out how disciplined she is, check out
how strongly she is committed to doing the
right thing, check out if she is willing to
be a true PARTNER or just looking for
you to do everything.
Check out how strongly she is able to
RESIST the pressure of the crazy values
preached by many people out there.
Dating is important, so that you PREVENT
yourself from getting into a relationship
with the wrong woman. Think of
dating as a SECURITY check where
you are SCREENING to prevent the
wrong woman or women from getting
into your MIND and your EMOTIONS.
Dating is about finding out who this woman
is INTERNALLY and emotionally.
5. GET INTO THE RIGHT STATE
There are all kinds of ways of getting into
the right emotional state so you can be
at your best when approaching a woman
and having a conversation with her.
The best way for you to get into the right
emotional state is to physically DO something,
because when your body MOVES, you actually
change your emotions. Motion creates emotion.
And to be even more precise, the best actions
to do are the things that you BELIEVE in.
So let's say you believe in charity, then
go out and FIND someone to give a buck
to. You will FEEL better and you will
also be CONGRUENT to the right values,
on a subconscious lever you will be showing
this stuff through tiny subtleties in your
demeanor. It's almost as if a woman will
be able to read your mind and know what
kind of person you are--all because you
will be in the congruent emotional state
to what you just DID recently.
If you believe in HEALTH and vitality,
you can go WORK OUT and approach
women after.
If you love music, then listen to your favourite
music and MOVE to it. It will change your
STATE, there is no way you can be in
a negative state when moving to music
you love. You don't have to even call
this 'dancing' what counts is the
NATURAL MOVEMENT that it
inspires in you.
You can do all the above, you can do
something different, but the key is to
take PHYSICAL action and DO it.
Ever notice how the best singers don't just
say the words but truly put their heart and
soul into the song? They make the words
dance on their tongues, they make the
words soar with emotion into the air.
They aren't just trying to get the song
over with, they are milking every last
word and syllable and having pleasure
and fun with it.
And when you talk with a woman,
don't talk about things that you don't
care about- it will be lifeless and boring.
And don't fake it either- instead, talk
about positive things and fun things
that you really DO care about. And
even MORE importantly, LISTEN
with genuine INTEREST in wanting
to know more about this person
rather than just wanting to get this
person's number or anything else.
6. GET A LIFE YOU ARE PASSIONATE ABOUT
Too many guys are just trying to learn to
FAKE being a cool guy with women.
It's not about being anything with women,
it's about being the best MAN you can be.
So when I hear about guys who are learning
from "pick up artist" types who teach them
to pretend they are busy, i.e. "after you
get the woman's number, make sure you
tell her you can't meet her that night
because you have plans- this will show
her you have a life and that you are hard
to get" it really makes no sense, since
the truth is you really SHOULD be a
man with a plan, a man with things on
his plate, with meaningful goals.
This way, you never have to PRETEND
you are busy with things, and you also
actually DO have things to talk about
that you care about, that are positive
and interesting, and these things also
help give you perspectives that you
can lend to helping HER perspectives
widen as well.
So for example, if you are talking to
her about some book she is reading,
and she tells you something about
ancient history or the character in
the book or the story or whatever,
you will have RICH PERSPECTIVES
and thoughts that you can SHARE
with her as well on the very thing
she is talking about, and you can
also help her see that you UNDERSTAND
her and that you can relate to what
she is saying.
Learning 'pick up lines' and learning to
pretend things like the dating gurus and
pick up artists like to do, is no way to develop
a powerful connection and a powerful
attraction from a woman to you.
7. HOW WOULD YOU BEHAVE IF
YOU RESPECTED YOURSELF TO
THE MAX?
I say this because it's so easy to think
that you are LESS than you really are.
Forget about women for one sec- this
has to do with YOU, not women:
How would you behave and speak and
carry yourself if YOU knew you were
worth a BILLION BUCKS?
Would there be DOUBT in your voice?
Would there be weakness and apology
constantly in your voice?
How would you respect your own TIME
if you knew it was DAMN VALUABLE?
How would you WALK and hold yourself
if you knew you TRULY MATTERED on
this Earth?
Start walking, breathing, and making
DECISIONS in your life based on the
fact that you ARE worthy.
If you DON'T do this, you will NEVER
even GET to the point where you can
SEE just how MASSIVELY this affects
your actual RESULTS in the real world
in every way- in business, with women,
with friends, family, etc.
And if you are reading this right now, and
are serious about meeting and attracting
the RIGHT woman, a woman you are nuts
about who is also nuts about you, then
I seriously suggest you take advantage
of my live coaching- whether you want
coaching on how to approach women,
how to make the date go smoothly,
or how to improve the relationship,
I can help you get there in the fastest
most efficient way possible.
To find out about my live coaching, go to:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/PrivateCoaching.html
And if you haven't yet downloaded my book,
'Get A Great Girl,' then definitely do that now.
This book will lay down the foundation you
need for meeting and attracting a woman
who is the 'real thing', and it's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
Till next time.
Michael Marks
P.S. To check out all my programs on meeting
and attracting the RIGHT woman, go to:
http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Congruency And Dominance To Attract A Woman
Today, I'd like to share with you
two instantly applicable and powerful
insights regarding attracting a
woman.
The first is regarding something known
as CONGRUENCY.
Ever notice how the best singers don't
always have the best voices, but they
always seem to TRULY BE singing from
the heart? They seem to TRULY be
emotionally engaged in whatever it
is they are singing?
This is an example of congruency.
Everything they are saying is also
backed up with body language and
tonality that is totally consistent
with the song.
One of the coolest things that you will
find extremely empowering is that you
DON'T have to pretend to be someone
else in order to attract a woman.
It doesn't matter if you are a party
animal, or a shy guy, you do NOT
have to try to adopt a character
or identity that is not you.
The key is to learn how to be truly
comfortable in your own skin.
99% of people are not this way,
they are the victims of endless
bad programming and bad conditioning
since childhood. So this 'being
comfortable in your own skin'
thing takes some know-how
if you are going to get it
right.
At the very moment of approaching
a woman who is a stranger, most men
tend to do the very things that show
the OPPOSITE of who they really
are. This even happens with
women we might already know,
if we are attracted to them.
So, for example, a guy who is really
NOT into the pop culture will pretend
that he is a real know it all about
Britney Spears, Madonna.
Or a guy who is actually not into
money, but feels INSECURE about it,
will try to show a woman he knows
a lot about money.
Similarly, a guy who may not really
be into academic stuff will pretend
that he reads a lot when in reality
he doesn't.
Or a guy who is not into dance clubs
and lounges will pretend he is by
name-dropping all the "hot spots"
in the city, the local clubs, etc.
The reality is that it's far more
important to be congruent with
who you really are, as long as
that person is coming from a
place of warmth and confidence.
So, if you want to start a
conversation with a woman
at the local bookstore, then
try starting the conversation
with your genuine thoughts
about something relevant-
such as the book she is
reading.
Then, when she gives you her
response, you should respond
genuinely with your feelings
and thoughts about what she
said, as long as your thoughts
are coming from a place of
warmth and confidence.
A woman can detect the inconsistencies
and incongruencies in your demeanor,
which means she will know something
is "sketchy" or untrue about you
if you lie or pretend to be someone
else.
On the other hand, if you are truly
congruent and consistent with your
real identity, and you are SECURE
with that identity, you will attract
her by showing her that you are
a man who doesn't need to play
games with her. This also gives
her the permission for HER to
be herself as well, and there
is nothing on earth like the
feeling of being yourself
and feeling GOOD about that.
I have always said that the
greatest gift you can give
a woman is greater self-esteem,
and by showing it in yourself
and by showing comfort in
your own identity, you help
inspire her to do the same.
I've had clients who have ranged
from extreme extroverts to extreme
introverts, and they have all done
well with women, by learning how
to unleash their true personalities
and getting rid of all the things
that we all do to BLOCK our identity
out of the fear that maybe that
identity isn't "cool" enough.
The irony is that BLOCKING our
identity is the very thing that
causes a woman's attraction to
shut DOWN.
So, from now on, I suggest you
take a conscious note of all
the things you tend to do in
conversations with a woman
that BLOCK what you really
feel and who you really are-
from showing off, from acting
too cool, from acting like
anybody that you're not.
And STOP doing those things.
So, stop talking too fast.
Stop trying to qualify yourself.
Start actually listening to her
rather than worrying if you
are coming across as cool or not.
Learn to be present in the moment.
All you have is the moment, nothing
else exists, so enjoy that moment,
and the next, and the next, etc.
The next key I want to discuss is DOMINANCE.
A lot of times you hear that women are attracted
to guys who are dominant. Most guys however,
misunderstand this and think it means being
a hard-ass.
The reality regarding this is that it has nothing
to do with that at all. It has to do with several
other things, though, and today I'll get into
ONE of those things, and that is the erotic
applications of this.
As you will see right now, being
dominant in the right way is actually
being KIND to a woman.
For better or for worse, the fact of the matter
is that women even today are still under the
influence of social programming, and even
though there is so much liberation, a lot of
women still feel guilty about sex, believe it
or not. Also, even if a woman has zero
guilt, what I am about to say enhances
attraction as well.
So, for example, let's say you meet a woman
in a dance club or a lounge or wherever,
even a coffee shop while in line. And you
begin a conversation with anything from
"Coffee is only the beginning of my
vices, how about you?" to teasing
her on the fancy bright pink martini she
has ordered and saying "You know that
drink would go better if you were wearing
pink shoes" The fact of the matter is,
at some time in the interaction, you
have to ESCALATE things. So for
example, you might have to get her
to sit down with you because it's
kind of silly to be standing there
blocking the line once you both
have your coffee or whatever drink
you both ordered.
Well, for many women, if you just ASK
her, "Would you like to sit with me over
there?" even a woman who may very well
have been feeling attraction for you, she
might now say "Ummm sorry, I have
to get going, but thanks."
Meanwhile, had you just said with DOMINANCE
the following statement rather than question:
"You need to take a break with the best,
come here and sit down for a sec" she
would have far more likely have not only
AGREED to do it, but also been
TURNED ON by the way you said it
with such dominance.
There are tons of reasons for this.
For one thing, it shows you are a man who
knows what he wants and has clarity. You
are showing that you aren't even considering
that she might say no, that you are so confident
that she will say yes. There are tons of
positive associations to this, it says you
are a winner, that you know what you
are doing, from survival in the wilderness
to having a fun romp in bed. It's all good
stuff.
And, there is another level to all this as
well- and that is the fact that if a woman
has to lead the show in the beginning, she
feels guilty sometimes. Whereas if YOU
lead the show, she can feel that you were
just "being a man" being a "guy", etc,
as if it was a man's role only to do this
stuff. And perception is reality, so the
fact is, if you DON'T lead the show,
if you are NOT dominant in leading
things and escalating the interaction,
she will feel you are not a man, she
will feel guilty for leading the show
herself, etc.
The more you lead, the more she can
ENJOY the interaction and not worry
or feel guilty about it. Now, of course,
if a woman clearly says no to anything, then
you OF COURSE leave her alone. The idea
though is that you must take responsibility
for escalating the interaction, and for doing
it with dominance.
It's a far bigger turn on, and it allows her to
also feel GOOD about the whole thing rather
than worry about being perceived as a "slut",
etc.
As you have seen above, dominance is a
crucial element to being successful with
women, but it must be done RIGHT.
If you'd like to get the full picture on
attraction, from the walk-up to a woman
all the way to getting her home with you,
to being able to spot a woman who would
be a fantastic girlfriend, to building a
fantastic connection with her, you owe
it to yourself to get my Mastery Program.
This program will take you into greater
depth on every area of attraction than
anything else out there on the planet.
For example, just on dominance alone
you will find over an HOUR'S worth of
pure gold, and on CD 8, tracks 5-10, you
will find exactly how to open a conversation
using dominance and how to continue
it this way.
And much, much more.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
And if you haven't yet downloaded my eBook-
Get A Great Girl, then do that now. It's got
TONS of ideas you can start using to meet
and attract the best quality women right
NOW.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
And for IMMERSION "Hands-On"
training in real venues where you will
GET the skills in ONE WEEKEND,
go to my BOOTCAMPS page at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
two instantly applicable and powerful
insights regarding attracting a
woman.
The first is regarding something known
as CONGRUENCY.
Ever notice how the best singers don't
always have the best voices, but they
always seem to TRULY BE singing from
the heart? They seem to TRULY be
emotionally engaged in whatever it
is they are singing?
This is an example of congruency.
Everything they are saying is also
backed up with body language and
tonality that is totally consistent
with the song.
One of the coolest things that you will
find extremely empowering is that you
DON'T have to pretend to be someone
else in order to attract a woman.
It doesn't matter if you are a party
animal, or a shy guy, you do NOT
have to try to adopt a character
or identity that is not you.
The key is to learn how to be truly
comfortable in your own skin.
99% of people are not this way,
they are the victims of endless
bad programming and bad conditioning
since childhood. So this 'being
comfortable in your own skin'
thing takes some know-how
if you are going to get it
right.
At the very moment of approaching
a woman who is a stranger, most men
tend to do the very things that show
the OPPOSITE of who they really
are. This even happens with
women we might already know,
if we are attracted to them.
So, for example, a guy who is really
NOT into the pop culture will pretend
that he is a real know it all about
Britney Spears, Madonna.
Or a guy who is actually not into
money, but feels INSECURE about it,
will try to show a woman he knows
a lot about money.
Similarly, a guy who may not really
be into academic stuff will pretend
that he reads a lot when in reality
he doesn't.
Or a guy who is not into dance clubs
and lounges will pretend he is by
name-dropping all the "hot spots"
in the city, the local clubs, etc.
The reality is that it's far more
important to be congruent with
who you really are, as long as
that person is coming from a
place of warmth and confidence.
So, if you want to start a
conversation with a woman
at the local bookstore, then
try starting the conversation
with your genuine thoughts
about something relevant-
such as the book she is
reading.
Then, when she gives you her
response, you should respond
genuinely with your feelings
and thoughts about what she
said, as long as your thoughts
are coming from a place of
warmth and confidence.
A woman can detect the inconsistencies
and incongruencies in your demeanor,
which means she will know something
is "sketchy" or untrue about you
if you lie or pretend to be someone
else.
On the other hand, if you are truly
congruent and consistent with your
real identity, and you are SECURE
with that identity, you will attract
her by showing her that you are
a man who doesn't need to play
games with her. This also gives
her the permission for HER to
be herself as well, and there
is nothing on earth like the
feeling of being yourself
and feeling GOOD about that.
I have always said that the
greatest gift you can give
a woman is greater self-esteem,
and by showing it in yourself
and by showing comfort in
your own identity, you help
inspire her to do the same.
I've had clients who have ranged
from extreme extroverts to extreme
introverts, and they have all done
well with women, by learning how
to unleash their true personalities
and getting rid of all the things
that we all do to BLOCK our identity
out of the fear that maybe that
identity isn't "cool" enough.
The irony is that BLOCKING our
identity is the very thing that
causes a woman's attraction to
shut DOWN.
So, from now on, I suggest you
take a conscious note of all
the things you tend to do in
conversations with a woman
that BLOCK what you really
feel and who you really are-
from showing off, from acting
too cool, from acting like
anybody that you're not.
And STOP doing those things.
So, stop talking too fast.
Stop trying to qualify yourself.
Start actually listening to her
rather than worrying if you
are coming across as cool or not.
Learn to be present in the moment.
All you have is the moment, nothing
else exists, so enjoy that moment,
and the next, and the next, etc.
The next key I want to discuss is DOMINANCE.
A lot of times you hear that women are attracted
to guys who are dominant. Most guys however,
misunderstand this and think it means being
a hard-ass.
The reality regarding this is that it has nothing
to do with that at all. It has to do with several
other things, though, and today I'll get into
ONE of those things, and that is the erotic
applications of this.
As you will see right now, being
dominant in the right way is actually
being KIND to a woman.
For better or for worse, the fact of the matter
is that women even today are still under the
influence of social programming, and even
though there is so much liberation, a lot of
women still feel guilty about sex, believe it
or not. Also, even if a woman has zero
guilt, what I am about to say enhances
attraction as well.
So, for example, let's say you meet a woman
in a dance club or a lounge or wherever,
even a coffee shop while in line. And you
begin a conversation with anything from
"Coffee is only the beginning of my
vices, how about you?" to teasing
her on the fancy bright pink martini she
has ordered and saying "You know that
drink would go better if you were wearing
pink shoes" The fact of the matter is,
at some time in the interaction, you
have to ESCALATE things. So for
example, you might have to get her
to sit down with you because it's
kind of silly to be standing there
blocking the line once you both
have your coffee or whatever drink
you both ordered.
Well, for many women, if you just ASK
her, "Would you like to sit with me over
there?" even a woman who may very well
have been feeling attraction for you, she
might now say "Ummm sorry, I have
to get going, but thanks."
Meanwhile, had you just said with DOMINANCE
the following statement rather than question:
"You need to take a break with the best,
come here and sit down for a sec" she
would have far more likely have not only
AGREED to do it, but also been
TURNED ON by the way you said it
with such dominance.
There are tons of reasons for this.
For one thing, it shows you are a man who
knows what he wants and has clarity. You
are showing that you aren't even considering
that she might say no, that you are so confident
that she will say yes. There are tons of
positive associations to this, it says you
are a winner, that you know what you
are doing, from survival in the wilderness
to having a fun romp in bed. It's all good
stuff.
And, there is another level to all this as
well- and that is the fact that if a woman
has to lead the show in the beginning, she
feels guilty sometimes. Whereas if YOU
lead the show, she can feel that you were
just "being a man" being a "guy", etc,
as if it was a man's role only to do this
stuff. And perception is reality, so the
fact is, if you DON'T lead the show,
if you are NOT dominant in leading
things and escalating the interaction,
she will feel you are not a man, she
will feel guilty for leading the show
herself, etc.
The more you lead, the more she can
ENJOY the interaction and not worry
or feel guilty about it. Now, of course,
if a woman clearly says no to anything, then
you OF COURSE leave her alone. The idea
though is that you must take responsibility
for escalating the interaction, and for doing
it with dominance.
It's a far bigger turn on, and it allows her to
also feel GOOD about the whole thing rather
than worry about being perceived as a "slut",
etc.
As you have seen above, dominance is a
crucial element to being successful with
women, but it must be done RIGHT.
If you'd like to get the full picture on
attraction, from the walk-up to a woman
all the way to getting her home with you,
to being able to spot a woman who would
be a fantastic girlfriend, to building a
fantastic connection with her, you owe
it to yourself to get my Mastery Program.
This program will take you into greater
depth on every area of attraction than
anything else out there on the planet.
For example, just on dominance alone
you will find over an HOUR'S worth of
pure gold, and on CD 8, tracks 5-10, you
will find exactly how to open a conversation
using dominance and how to continue
it this way.
And much, much more.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
And if you haven't yet downloaded my eBook-
Get A Great Girl, then do that now. It's got
TONS of ideas you can start using to meet
and attract the best quality women right
NOW.
It's at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/Book.html
And for IMMERSION "Hands-On"
training in real venues where you will
GET the skills in ONE WEEKEND,
go to my BOOTCAMPS page at:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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