When it comes to success in approaching women
who are total strangers, i.e. when it comes to "picking
up women" and attracting women who are total strangers,
there is ONE thing I need to make ABSOLUTELY CLEAR:
DON’T WORRY ABOUT COMING ACROSS AS PSYCHO
WHEN APPROACHING RANDOM GORGEOUS WOMEN.
I have a strong feeling that it is THIS fear, the fear of
seeming “weird” or possibly even seeming like a PSYCHO,
that STOPS most men from approaching a woman somewhere
who is a total stranger, whether it’s on public transportation,
or on the sidewalk, or in a mall, or in a café, or just
about ANYWHERE else.
And I desperately want anyone reading this to
know that I truly understand this fear, for it used
to be the number one thing that screwed me up
when it came to approaching random but gorgeous
women in public.
GOOD GUYS GET BRAINWASHED TO BE
"ANTI-SEPTIC" AND "NON-SEXUAL" WHEN
APPROACHING WOMEN.
One of the many reasons that it was so hard for me
to approach women the right way was because I had
been brainwashed not only by popular culture and
the general feminism and all the daytime talk shows
like Oprah that made it seem that all men were rapists,
women abusers, molesters, etc, etc, but I ALSO was
super-brainwashed by ANOTHER force:
This force was the effect of certain political
science courses I had taken in university, where
according to certain feminist professors, just
about EVERYthing in our society was ALL
aimed at subjugating women, including even
the very ACT of sex itself, was somehow
“anti-women” because somehow the woman
was made “passive” in this act, while the
man was the “active one” and the “aggressor”
in this act!
So, at the time, even though I was SURROUNDED
by gorgeous young women EVERYWHERE, I
was also kind of NEUTRALIZED by all this insane
brainwashing.
I became SUPER CONCERNED with making sure
that any approach I made with women was super
politically correct, I made sure NOT to escalate
unless at least one TRILLION green lights were
present, which means that basically unless the
WOMAN was being aggressive about wanting
to push things, I would NEVER escalate.
And in general, women don't START aggressively.
So unless a guy really is a rock star or famous
celebrity or athlete, if he waits for some woman
to just come up to him and aggressively pursue
him, he is going to have very few options.
It happens, but just not often. It happens sometimes
when a woman just really likes a guy for some reason
even she might not be aware of, without even knowing him.
You DON'T want to rely on this, you want to be ACTIVE about
attracting women and have access to the pool of MILLIONS
of attractive women out there.
THIS is a big problem that GOOD GUYS have.
Good guys are so concerned with RESPECTING
women, with not hurting women, that they end
up being SO CAREFUL to the point that they
convey NO NAUGHTINESS, NO SEXUAL VIBE,
no “ROUGH AND TUMBLE”, no NOTHING!
And yet, if you, as a good guy, CONVEY the
sexual vibe, convey the masculinity, and you
convey the playfulness, then a woman will
be ECSTATIC about you, as you will have
THE MAGIC COMBO of being a sexy
fun naughty guy who ALSO has the vibes
of warmth and caring as well.
It took me YEARS to realize that just about every
attractive girl on campus did NOT want any man
to actually BELIEVE in the “all men are rapists”
stuff, and did NOT want any man to approach them
in the politically correct way where basically
NOTHING happens unless the WOMAN does all
the escalating, which goes against just about
EVERYTHING that is actually hard-wired into
female sexuality and female fantasy.
The TRUTH about female fantasy is that they
actually want men to behave like men!
So my point is this: The next time you see a woman
ANYWHERE that you would like to approach,
if the thing stopping you from taking action is
that you think it is somehow WEIRD for men
to approach women who are strangers, then
DEFINITELY go approach her anyway.
It is NOT weird.
Women WANT men to approach them, and the
thing that screws up most approaches that men
do on women has NOTHING to do with coming
across as a PSYCHO for making the approach.
Often, in fact, the thing that screws men up is
coming across as so CAUTIOUS that there is
no ZEST, no FUN, no LIFE to the interaction.
Instead, throw caution to the wind and have
some FUN with the interaction. Infuse the
interaction with some sexuality, some spice,
some warmth, some excitement.
Let me give you an example of something
that I learned from a cool friend of mine
named Barry, (some of you know him from
my interview with him on the power of
comedy and humor) who adapted it from
a game by Howard Stern.
Now, the following game is slightly more adapted
for a party environment, but you can use it anywhere
by toning it down a bit.
So let’s say I’m walking into a lounge on a Saturday
night, and I see TONS of gorgeous women, all of
whom are total strangers to me.
I might walk up to a woman I like, and tell her
“Hey, have you ever played the game F**K,
MARRY, KILL?”
YES.
That is the point, the point is to NOT come across
as a boring, anti-septic, non-sexual person.
She will most likely ask:
“What is that???
I don’t know if that game is for me.”
Trust me, this game is WAY more for her
and she KNOWS it, this is just her way of
showing she is not a tramp.
So I (or you, if you are playing the game with her)
explain to her:
“What happens is you point to a woman, and I
tell you whether I would want to F**K her,
marry her, or kill her, and then, you point
out two more women where again I tell you
what I would do, at which point we then switch
the game up, and **I** point to three guys and
you tell me if you’d rather F**k them, marry them,
or kill them.”
Now, this game is a GAME.
It’s not meant to be REAL.
But it can have some pretty DEEP impact
and do a lot of powerful things if you
play it right.
So, for example, if she points to a woman,
and I say IMMEDIATELY, “Oh her??? KILL, for sure.”
Now, you DON’T say this loud to offend anyone,
the point is that now the woman you are with will
probably say, “Why??? Why would you kill her so fast??”
And HERE is where it is FUNNY, and you show
that you have HIGH STANDARDS:
So I might reply that the reason is because I
can’t STAND her dress, or her purse, or her
choice of drink, or ANYTHING super trivial
that is really NOT a real reason for wanting
to kill ANYONE.
The point here is to show that of course this has
NOTHING to do with violence, but to show through
HUMOR that you have INSANELY HIGH STANDARDS,
WHICH IS FUNNY yet also shows CONFIDENCE.
In fact, the more trivial the reason for choosing “kill her”
the more this works.
On the other hand, if I genuinely see something
attractive about the PERSONALITY of one of the
three women she points out, then I might very well
say I would MARRY that woman, and when the
woman I’m playing the game with asks “why”,
(which she likely would ask, and if she doesn’t
ask, you can always volunteer the reason why
anyway) I (or you, if you are playing the game)
would EXPLAIN, that it’s because
you can see that the particular woman was
doing something you liked, for example:
-She was dressed tastefully not slutty.
-She was in middle of giving a compliment to her friend.
-She wasn’t rudely shoving through the crowd but instead was politely moving through.
-Etc., etc., etc.
You could even LATER use this "marry" topic
as a way to sprinkle in a little more info
on the GOOD QUALITIES you seek in a woman,
all without getting TOO serious in the
conversation, as you can then playfully
go back to the more naughty elements of
the conversation, and then finally
just focus on chilling out together
without chatting much at all, which
is the final level before getting
all-out physical together.
The reasons you choose for your decisions in this game
are what create the humor and also what convey information
about YOUR cool character.
Then, you flip the game, and YOU point out three guys,
and you can always learn more about her from HER
reasons for her decisions on whether to f, marry, or kill
the guy, PLUS you can tease her on her answers.
This gives her a chance to express her OWN sexuality
and her own preferences for what is important to her
in relationships as well, you are getting a woman to
lower her guard and be EXTREMELY revealing
sexually with you in terms of what turns her on,
and if you ask the right questions and lead her
properly, you are also learning what makes her feel
loved as well, all of which is PURE GOLD that
you can use to attract her, seduce her, and make
her crazy in love with you.
And you can MODIFY this game so you can play
it anywhere, by changing the “f**k” to “sleep with”,
and you can change the “kill” to “punch” or “slap”,
etc ,etc. And you can CERTAINLY play this game
after breaking the ice with something a little more
neutral like a comment on the magazine she is
reading or something else she is doing or something
else that is going on in the environment.
But overall, compare playing THIS GAME with
a woman you just met, with the TYPICAL approach
that a guy will do, if he even approaches her at all,
with the all-too-common, “So, you come here often?”
How much CHARACTER and personality does
that reveal, by just asking a woman “So, come
here often?”
It reveals NOTHING, plus it’s BORING.
The fact of the matter is, men and women ARE
sexual. We DO have passions, we DO want to
laugh, we DO want to have fun, we also have
things we can’t STAND, and it FEELS good
to be able to CONNECT with the opposite
sex in a way that is IMMEDIATELY
relevant! It feels good not only for YOU,
but it feels good also for HER!
For once, she can talk about sexual things,
she can talk about passionate things, she
can LAUGH, she can tell you the things
about a guy she can’t STAND, she can
do all this within MOMENTS with YOU,
a total stranger, because you have MADE
IT EASY for her to do so.
Plus, by doing all this, you IMMEDIATELY
convey that you are a man who UNDERSTANDS
women, who understands the whole sexual
dynamic, and that you are a guy who is so
comfortable with all this that clearly you
must have an abundance of choice of
women in your life.
And that in itself is attractive as well, since
it implies you are already “chosen” by
women; it gives you the all powerful
“social proof”.
On the OTHER HAND, if you are so worried
about not coming across as a psycho, you will
NEVER do any of this!! You might not even make
any APPROACH to any woman whatsoever!
Trust me, just because most men do not do the
random approaches, does NOT mean that it
doesn’t work.
Let me PROVE it to you:
If a total STRANGER came up to you on the
street, with a huge CHUNK of PURE GOLD,
and told you he is GIVING it to you, and then
he gave it to you, and then he left, would you
somehow THROW OUT that gold????????
Would you say to yourself, “This isn’t TYPICAL,
this MUST be fake gold, so I am going to
throw it OUT”????????????????????????????
You would NOT do that.
You MIGHT be a bit skeptical, you might even
be suspicious, but you would WANT the gold
in case it IS gold, right?
It’s the EXACT SAME THING with approaching
women, but even EASIER because it’s not so
out of the ordinary as most guys think.
The truth is, especially with attractive women,
over the course of their lives they HAVE
been approached many times, and their
attractive FRIENDS have been approached
many times, and between them and their
friends, they KNOW of several success stories
where the men and women ended up not only
hooking up, but often having great relationships
as well.
These women just don’t go AROUND telling
everyone that the men they met were total
strangers, but all their BEST friends know!
This is yet again another example of how some
guys are “inside” the circle of knowledge of
what REALLY goes on, and other guys are on
the “outside” and have no clue. I used to be
on the outside, and it SUCKED.
And once you’re in, you realize how crazy it
is to be living on the outside in ignorance.
However, just like the GOLD example, there
needs to be a certain amount of TRUST built
up in the interaction to OVERCOME the
perfectly normal CAUTIOUSNESS that
most women have regarding meeting men
who are total strangers.
THIS is a huge part of the ART of learning
how to successfully approach women, it’s
not just the act of approaching them, but also
the art of building up a connection, a sense
of trust as well.
But this is NOT that hard to learn, (stay tuned
to the end of this newsletter for more on how
to learn how to do this as well as learn the
ENTIRE "nitty gritty" of pick-up) and it CERTAINLY
is not a reason to let MILLIONS of gorgeous women
just slip through your fingers!
A woman having a bit of CAUTION is very
different from a woman not being OPEN to
the idea.
In fact, meeting the seductive mysterious stranger
is one of the BIGGEST FANTASIES that women
have.
Do the approach right, and you are catering
to her biggest desire, and she is now rooting
for you and will do everything in HER power
to help you SUCCEED in picking her up!
For example, if she is around friends, she will
ask her friends for some privacy, or even
find a reason for you and her to move away
from her friends for more privacy.
So don’t let the fear of coming across as a
psycho stop you from making the approach,
and don’t let it stop you from making your
approach have a fun, sexual, intriguing
VIBE to it!
By incorporating some sexual vibe to your
conversation, and by doing it playfully
as described in the example above, you are
allowing her to bridge into becoming sexual
with you in a very SMOOTH WAY.
It allows you to get closer to her without her
wondering what is going on. She will KNOW
what is going on, she will KNOW the dynamic
is SEXUAL.
It allows you to do things like graze your leg
against hers lightly if she is sitting across
from you in the next bar stool, it allows
you to touch her hair and compliment her
on how soft it is, without seeming creepy,
because you have already got her laughing
and having a good time and not feeling
like she needs to pretend that she is not
a sexual person with you.
Plus, another advantage of that game I
explained is that you can WALK AROUND
the location as you play and as you look
for people, and as you walk around, you
can ALSO find a great place for BOTH of
you to sit to then CONTINUE the chat
and continue to escalate the interaction
in a sexual way.
And that is just one fantastic example of a great
strategy applying the concept of being more sexual,
more playful, and leading the way in the pick-up.
So what you have just read, as you can tell,
comes from REAL WORLD experience.
This isn’t stuff I dreamed up that just sounds nice.
It’s what works to get men and women together
EFFECTIVELY, even if they were total strangers
when they met.
This is the true NITTY GRITTY of “pick–up”.
To learn the FULL picture on the NITTY GRITTY
of pick-up, I SERIOUSLY suggest that you download
my ATTRACTION MASTERY PROGRAM.
This program is approximately TWELVE HOURS
of CREAM-OF-THE-CROP strategies on how to
stop any woman ANYWHERE and have her
screaming your name in passion in bed in the
absolute fastest time possible.
And as powerful as today’s newsletter is, it
just comprises a few MOMENTS of the
HOURS AND HOURS OF PURE GOLD
in this program.
It’s at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
This program gives you the exact DETAILS
for what to do.
This program is being used by men all over
the globe to attract the women they want,
and I continue to receive testimonials from
men praising this program and how it is
working for them.
It works for them, and it will work for you too.
You have my word on it, and I take my word
very seriously.
Again, it's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
Showing posts with label playful. Show all posts
Showing posts with label playful. Show all posts
Friday, February 21, 2014
Monday, November 19, 2012
Attracting Women: Naughty, Psycho, Sexual
When it comes to success in approaching women
who are total strangers, i.e. when it comes to "picking
up women" and attracting women who are total strangers,
there is ONE thing I need to make ABSOLUTELY CLEAR:
DON’T WORRY ABOUT COMING ACROSS AS PSYCHO
WHEN APPROACHING RANDOM GORGEOUS WOMEN.
I have a strong feeling that it is THIS fear, the fear of
seeming “weird” or possibly even seeming like a PSYCHO,
that STOPS most men from approaching a woman somewhere
who is a total stranger, whether it’s on public transportation,
or on the sidewalk, or in a mall, or in a café, or just
about ANYWHERE else.
And I desperately want anyone reading this to
know that I truly understand this fear, for it used
to be the number one thing that screwed me up
when it came to approaching random but gorgeous
women in public.
GOOD GUYS GET BRAINWASHED TO BE
"ANTI-SEPTIC" AND "NON-SEXUAL" WHEN
APPROACHING WOMEN.
One of the many reasons that it was so hard for me
to approach women the right way was because I had
been brainwashed not only by popular culture and
the general feminism and all the daytime talk shows
like Oprah that made it seem that all men were rapists,
women abusers, molesters, etc, etc, but I ALSO was
super-brainwashed by ANOTHER force:
This force was the effect of certain political
science courses I had taken in university, where
according to certain feminist professors, just
about EVERYthing in our society was ALL
aimed at subjugating women, including even
the very ACT of sex itself, was somehow
“anti-women” because somehow the woman
was made “passive” in this act, while the
man was the “active one” and the “aggressor”
in this act!
So, at the time, even though I was SURROUNDED
by gorgeous young women EVERYWHERE, I
was also kind of NEUTRALIZED by all this insane
brainwashing.
I became SUPER CONCERNED with making sure
that any approach I made with women was super
politically correct, I made sure NOT to escalate
unless at least one TRILLION green lights were
present, which means that basically unless the
WOMAN was being aggressive about wanting
to push things, I would NEVER escalate.
And in general, women don't START aggressively.
So unless a guy really is a rock star or famous
celebrity or athlete, if he waits for some woman
to just come up to him and aggressively pursue
him, he is going to have very few options.
It happens, but just not often. It happens sometimes
when a woman just really likes a guy for some reason
even she might not be aware of, without even knowing him.
You DON'T want to rely on this, you want to be ACTIVE about
attracting women and have access to the pool of MILLIONS
of attractive women out there.
THIS is a big problem that GOOD GUYS have.
Good guys are so concerned with RESPECTING
women, with not hurting women, that they end
up being SO CAREFUL to the point that they
convey NO NAUGHTINESS, NO SEXUAL VIBE,
no “ROUGH AND TUMBLE”, no NOTHING!
And yet, if you, as a good guy, CONVEY the
sexual vibe, convey the masculinity, and you
convey the playfulness, then a woman will
be ECSTATIC about you, as you will have
THE MAGIC COMBO of being a sexy
fun naughty guy who ALSO has the vibes
of warmth and caring as well.
It took me YEARS to realize that just about every
attractive girl on campus did NOT want any man
to actually BELIEVE in the “all men are rapists”
stuff, and did NOT want any man to approach them
in the politically correct way where basically
NOTHING happens unless the WOMAN does all
the escalating, which goes against just about
EVERYTHING that is actually hard-wired into
female sexuality and female fantasy.
The TRUTH about female fantasy is that they
actually want men to behave like men!
So my point is this: The next time you see a woman
ANYWHERE that you would like to approach,
if the thing stopping you from taking action is
that you think it is somehow WEIRD for men
to approach women who are strangers, then
DEFINITELY go approach her anyway.
It is NOT weird.
Women WANT men to approach them, and the
thing that screws up most approaches that men
do on women has NOTHING to do with coming
across as a PSYCHO for making the approach.
Often, in fact, the thing that screws men up is
coming across as so CAUTIOUS that there is
no ZEST, no FUN, no LIFE to the interaction.
Instead, throw caution to the wind and have
some FUN with the interaction. Infuse the
interaction with some sexuality, some spice,
some warmth, some excitement.
Let me give you an example of something
that I learned from a cool friend of mine
named Barry Kirkey, who himself adapted
it from a game by Howard Stern.
Now, the following game is slightly more adapted
for a party environment, but you can use it anywhere
by toning it down a bit.
So let’s say I’m walking into a lounge on a Saturday
night, and I see TONS of gorgeous women, all of
whom are total strangers to me.
I might walk up to a woman I like, and tell her
“Hey, have you ever played the game F**K,
MARRY, KILL?”
YES.
That is the point, the point is to NOT come across
as a boring, anti-septic, non-sexual person.
She will most likely ask:
“What is that???
I don’t know if that game is for me.”
Trust me, this game is WAY more for her
and she KNOWS it, this is just her way of
showing she is not a tramp.
So I (or you, if you are playing the game with her)
explain to her:
“What happens is you point to a woman, and I
tell you whether I would want to F**K her,
marry her, or kill her, and then, you point
out two more women where again I tell you
what I would do, at which point we then switch
the game up, and **I** point to three guys and
you tell me if you’d rather F**k them, marry them,
or kill them.”
Now, this game is a GAME.
It’s not meant to be REAL.
But it can have some pretty DEEP impact
and do a lot of powerful things if you
play it right.
So, for example, if she points to a woman,
and I say IMMEDIATELY, “Oh her??? KILL, for sure.”
Now, you DON’T say this loud to offend anyone,
the point is that now the woman you are with will
probably say, “Why??? Why would you kill her so fast??”
And HERE is where it is FUNNY, and you show
that you have HIGH STANDARDS:
So I might reply that the reason is because I
can’t STAND her dress, or her purse, or her
choice of drink, or ANYTHING super trivial
that is really NOT a real reason for wanting
to kill ANYONE.
The point here is to show that of course this has
NOTHING to do with violence, but to show through
HUMOR that you have INSANELY HIGH STANDARDS,
WHICH IS FUNNY yet also shows CONFIDENCE.
In fact, the more trivial the reason for choosing “kill her”
the more this works.
On the other hand, if I genuinely see something
attractive about the PERSONALITY of one of the
three women she points out, then I might very well
say I would MARRY that woman, and when the
woman I’m playing the game with asks “why”,
(which she likely would ask, and if she doesn’t
ask, you can always volunteer the reason why
anyway) I (or you, if you are playing the game)
would EXPLAIN, that it’s because
you can see that the particular woman was
doing something you liked, for example:
-She was dressed tastefully not slutty.
-She was in middle of giving a compliment to her friend.
-She wasn’t rudely shoving through the crowd but instead was politely moving through.
-Etc., etc., etc.
You could even LATER use this "marry" topic
as a way to sprinkle in a little more info
on the GOOD QUALITIES you seek in a woman,
all without getting TOO serious in the
conversation, as you can then playfully
go back to the more naughty elements of
the conversation, and then finally
just focus on chilling out together
without chatting much at all, which
is the final level before getting
all-out physical together.
The reasons you choose for your decisions in this game
are what create the humor and also what convey information
about YOUR cool character.
Then, you flip the game, and YOU point out three guys,
and you can always learn more about her from HER
reasons for her decisions on whether to f, marry, or kill
the guy, PLUS you can tease her on her answers.
This gives her a chance to express her OWN sexuality
and her own preferences for what is important to her
in relationships as well, you are getting a woman to
lower her guard and be EXTREMELY revealing
sexually with you in terms of what turns her on,
and if you ask the right questions and lead her
properly, you are also learning what makes her feel
loved as well, all of which is PURE GOLD that
you can use to attract her, seduce her, and make
her crazy in love with you.
And you can MODIFY this game so you can play
it anywhere, by changing the “f**k” to “sleep with”,
and you can change the “kill” to “punch” or “slap”,
etc ,etc. And you can CERTAINLY play this game
after breaking the ice with something a little more
neutral like a comment on the magazine she is
reading or something else she is doing or something
else that is going on in the environment.
But overall, compare playing THIS GAME with
a woman you just met, with the TYPICAL approach
that a guy will do, if he even approaches her at all,
with the all-too-common, “So, you come here often?”
How much CHARACTER and personality does
that reveal, by just asking a woman “So, come
here often?”
It reveals NOTHING, plus it’s BORING.
The fact of the matter is, men and women ARE
sexual. We DO have passions, we DO want to
laugh, we DO want to have fun, we also have
things we can’t STAND, and it FEELS good
to be able to CONNECT with the opposite
sex in a way that is IMMEDIATELY
relevant! It feels good not only for YOU,
but it feels good also for HER!
For once, she can talk about sexual things,
she can talk about passionate things, she
can LAUGH, she can tell you the things
about a guy she can’t STAND, she can
do all this within MOMENTS with YOU,
a total stranger, because you have MADE
IT EASY for her to do so.
Plus, by doing all this, you IMMEDIATELY
convey that you are a man who UNDERSTANDS
women, who understands the whole sexual
dynamic, and that you are a guy who is so
comfortable with all this that clearly you
must have an abundance of choice of
women in your life.
And that in itself is attractive as well, since
it implies you are already “chosen” by
women; it gives you the all powerful
“social proof”.
On the OTHER HAND, if you are so worried
about not coming across as a psycho, you will
NEVER do any of this!! You might not even make
any APPROACH to any woman whatsoever!
Trust me, just because most men do not do the
random approaches, does NOT mean that it
doesn’t work.
Let me PROVE it to you:
If a total STRANGER came up to you on the
street, with a huge CHUNK of PURE GOLD,
and told you he is GIVING it to you, and then
he gave it to you, and then he left, would you
somehow THROW OUT that gold????????
Would you say to yourself, “This isn’t TYPICAL,
this MUST be fake gold, so I am going to
throw it OUT”????????????????????????????
You would NOT do that.
You MIGHT be a bit skeptical, you might even
be suspicious, but you would WANT the gold
in case it IS gold, right?
It’s the EXACT SAME THING with approaching
women, but even EASIER because it’s not so
out of the ordinary as most guys think.
The truth is, especially with attractive women,
over the course of their lives they HAVE
been approached many times, and their
attractive FRIENDS have been approached
many times, and between them and their
friends, they KNOW of several success stories
where the men and women ended up not only
hooking up, but often having great relationships
as well.
These women just don’t go AROUND telling
everyone that the men they met were total
strangers, but all their BEST friends know!
This is yet again another example of how some
guys are “inside” the circle of knowledge of
what REALLY goes on, and other guys are on
the “outside” and have no clue. I used to be
on the outside, and it SUCKED.
And once you’re in, you realize how crazy it
is to be living on the outside in ignorance.
However, just like the GOLD example, there
needs to be a certain amount of TRUST built
up in the interaction to OVERCOME the
perfectly normal CAUTIOUSNESS that
most women have regarding meeting men
who are total strangers.
THIS is a huge part of the ART of learning
how to successfully approach women, it’s
not just the act of approaching them, but also
the art of building up a connection, a sense
of trust as well.
But this is NOT that hard to learn, (stay tuned
to the end of this newsletter for more on how
to learn how to do this as well as learn the
ENTIRE "nitty gritty" of pick-up) and it CERTAINLY
is not a reason to let MILLIONS of gorgeous women
just slip through your fingers!
A woman having a bit of CAUTION is very
different from a woman not being OPEN to
the idea.
In fact, meeting the seductive mysterious stranger
is one of the BIGGEST FANTASIES that women
have.
Do the approach right, and you are catering
to her biggest desire, and she is now rooting
for you and will do everything in HER power
to help you SUCCEED in picking her up!
For example, if she is around friends, she will
ask her friends for some privacy, or even
find a reason for you and her to move away
from her friends for more privacy.
So don’t let the fear of coming across as a
psycho stop you from making the approach,
and don’t let it stop you from making your
approach have a fun, sexual, intriguing
VIBE to it!
By incorporating some sexual vibe to your
conversation, and by doing it playfully
as described in the example above, you are
allowing her to bridge into becoming sexual
with you in a very SMOOTH WAY.
It allows you to get closer to her without her
wondering what is going on. She will KNOW
what is going on, she will KNOW the dynamic
is SEXUAL.
It allows you to do things like graze your leg
against hers lightly if she is sitting across
from you in the next bar stool, it allows
you to touch her hair and compliment her
on how soft it is, without seeming creepy,
because you have already got her laughing
and having a good time and not feeling
like she needs to pretend that she is not
a sexual person with you.
Plus, another advantage of that game I
explained is that you can WALK AROUND
the location as you play and as you look
for people, and as you walk around, you
can ALSO find a great place for BOTH of
you to sit to then CONTINUE the chat
and continue to escalate the interaction
in a sexual way.
And that is just one fantastic example of a great
strategy applying the concept of being more sexual,
more playful, and leading the way in the pick-up.
So what you have just read, as you can tell,
comes from REAL WORLD experience.
This isn’t stuff I dreamed up that just sounds nice.
It’s what works to get men and women together
EFFECTIVELY, even if they were total strangers
when they met.
This is the true NITTY GRITTY of “pick–up”.
To learn the FULL picture on the NITTY GRITTY
of pick-up, I SERIOUSLY suggest that you download
my ATTRACTION MASTERY PROGRAM.
This program is approximately TWELVE HOURS
of CREAM-OF-THE-CROP strategies on how to
stop any woman ANYWHERE and have her
screaming your name in passion in bed in the
absolute fastest time possible.
And as powerful as today’s newsletter is, it
just comprises a few MOMENTS of the
HOURS AND HOURS OF PURE GOLD
in this program.
It’s at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
If you want to have the absolute maximum CHOICE
when it comes to women, get this program NOW.
Does this program cost a bit more than some
other programs out there?
Yes it does.
Is it worth every penny?
It’s worth TEN TIMES the cost, and that is not
me being dramatic. This program is absolutely
worth TEN TIMES the cost because it is the most
effective program out there for ensuring your
success when it comes to "picking up women".
This program gives you the exact DETAILS
for what to do.
This program is being used by men all over
the globe to attract the women they want,
and I continue to receive testimonials from
men praising this program and how it is
working for them.
It works for them, and it will work for you too.
You have my word on it, and I take my word
very seriously.
Again, it's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
And if you haven't yet downloaded my book,
The Dating Wizard, then DEFINITELY DO THAT
FIRST. Before anything else, before any
of my other programs.
This book forms the foundation for your
success with women. It is ABSOLUTELY
essential.
It's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Wizard.html
***ABOUT THE LIVE-BOOTCAMPS***
Live bootcamps are currently booked through
January 2013, but at this moment there is still
a chance to reserve a bootcamp for mid-to-late
February.
Bootcamp details are at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/bootcamp-sign-up.html
To find out about all my programs for skyrocketing
your success with women, go here:
http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
Till next time,
Michael Marks
who are total strangers, i.e. when it comes to "picking
up women" and attracting women who are total strangers,
there is ONE thing I need to make ABSOLUTELY CLEAR:
DON’T WORRY ABOUT COMING ACROSS AS PSYCHO
WHEN APPROACHING RANDOM GORGEOUS WOMEN.
I have a strong feeling that it is THIS fear, the fear of
seeming “weird” or possibly even seeming like a PSYCHO,
that STOPS most men from approaching a woman somewhere
who is a total stranger, whether it’s on public transportation,
or on the sidewalk, or in a mall, or in a café, or just
about ANYWHERE else.
And I desperately want anyone reading this to
know that I truly understand this fear, for it used
to be the number one thing that screwed me up
when it came to approaching random but gorgeous
women in public.
GOOD GUYS GET BRAINWASHED TO BE
"ANTI-SEPTIC" AND "NON-SEXUAL" WHEN
APPROACHING WOMEN.
One of the many reasons that it was so hard for me
to approach women the right way was because I had
been brainwashed not only by popular culture and
the general feminism and all the daytime talk shows
like Oprah that made it seem that all men were rapists,
women abusers, molesters, etc, etc, but I ALSO was
super-brainwashed by ANOTHER force:
This force was the effect of certain political
science courses I had taken in university, where
according to certain feminist professors, just
about EVERYthing in our society was ALL
aimed at subjugating women, including even
the very ACT of sex itself, was somehow
“anti-women” because somehow the woman
was made “passive” in this act, while the
man was the “active one” and the “aggressor”
in this act!
So, at the time, even though I was SURROUNDED
by gorgeous young women EVERYWHERE, I
was also kind of NEUTRALIZED by all this insane
brainwashing.
I became SUPER CONCERNED with making sure
that any approach I made with women was super
politically correct, I made sure NOT to escalate
unless at least one TRILLION green lights were
present, which means that basically unless the
WOMAN was being aggressive about wanting
to push things, I would NEVER escalate.
And in general, women don't START aggressively.
So unless a guy really is a rock star or famous
celebrity or athlete, if he waits for some woman
to just come up to him and aggressively pursue
him, he is going to have very few options.
It happens, but just not often. It happens sometimes
when a woman just really likes a guy for some reason
even she might not be aware of, without even knowing him.
You DON'T want to rely on this, you want to be ACTIVE about
attracting women and have access to the pool of MILLIONS
of attractive women out there.
THIS is a big problem that GOOD GUYS have.
Good guys are so concerned with RESPECTING
women, with not hurting women, that they end
up being SO CAREFUL to the point that they
convey NO NAUGHTINESS, NO SEXUAL VIBE,
no “ROUGH AND TUMBLE”, no NOTHING!
And yet, if you, as a good guy, CONVEY the
sexual vibe, convey the masculinity, and you
convey the playfulness, then a woman will
be ECSTATIC about you, as you will have
THE MAGIC COMBO of being a sexy
fun naughty guy who ALSO has the vibes
of warmth and caring as well.
It took me YEARS to realize that just about every
attractive girl on campus did NOT want any man
to actually BELIEVE in the “all men are rapists”
stuff, and did NOT want any man to approach them
in the politically correct way where basically
NOTHING happens unless the WOMAN does all
the escalating, which goes against just about
EVERYTHING that is actually hard-wired into
female sexuality and female fantasy.
The TRUTH about female fantasy is that they
actually want men to behave like men!
So my point is this: The next time you see a woman
ANYWHERE that you would like to approach,
if the thing stopping you from taking action is
that you think it is somehow WEIRD for men
to approach women who are strangers, then
DEFINITELY go approach her anyway.
It is NOT weird.
Women WANT men to approach them, and the
thing that screws up most approaches that men
do on women has NOTHING to do with coming
across as a PSYCHO for making the approach.
Often, in fact, the thing that screws men up is
coming across as so CAUTIOUS that there is
no ZEST, no FUN, no LIFE to the interaction.
Instead, throw caution to the wind and have
some FUN with the interaction. Infuse the
interaction with some sexuality, some spice,
some warmth, some excitement.
Let me give you an example of something
that I learned from a cool friend of mine
named Barry Kirkey, who himself adapted
it from a game by Howard Stern.
Now, the following game is slightly more adapted
for a party environment, but you can use it anywhere
by toning it down a bit.
So let’s say I’m walking into a lounge on a Saturday
night, and I see TONS of gorgeous women, all of
whom are total strangers to me.
I might walk up to a woman I like, and tell her
“Hey, have you ever played the game F**K,
MARRY, KILL?”
YES.
That is the point, the point is to NOT come across
as a boring, anti-septic, non-sexual person.
She will most likely ask:
“What is that???
I don’t know if that game is for me.”
Trust me, this game is WAY more for her
and she KNOWS it, this is just her way of
showing she is not a tramp.
So I (or you, if you are playing the game with her)
explain to her:
“What happens is you point to a woman, and I
tell you whether I would want to F**K her,
marry her, or kill her, and then, you point
out two more women where again I tell you
what I would do, at which point we then switch
the game up, and **I** point to three guys and
you tell me if you’d rather F**k them, marry them,
or kill them.”
Now, this game is a GAME.
It’s not meant to be REAL.
But it can have some pretty DEEP impact
and do a lot of powerful things if you
play it right.
So, for example, if she points to a woman,
and I say IMMEDIATELY, “Oh her??? KILL, for sure.”
Now, you DON’T say this loud to offend anyone,
the point is that now the woman you are with will
probably say, “Why??? Why would you kill her so fast??”
And HERE is where it is FUNNY, and you show
that you have HIGH STANDARDS:
So I might reply that the reason is because I
can’t STAND her dress, or her purse, or her
choice of drink, or ANYTHING super trivial
that is really NOT a real reason for wanting
to kill ANYONE.
The point here is to show that of course this has
NOTHING to do with violence, but to show through
HUMOR that you have INSANELY HIGH STANDARDS,
WHICH IS FUNNY yet also shows CONFIDENCE.
In fact, the more trivial the reason for choosing “kill her”
the more this works.
On the other hand, if I genuinely see something
attractive about the PERSONALITY of one of the
three women she points out, then I might very well
say I would MARRY that woman, and when the
woman I’m playing the game with asks “why”,
(which she likely would ask, and if she doesn’t
ask, you can always volunteer the reason why
anyway) I (or you, if you are playing the game)
would EXPLAIN, that it’s because
you can see that the particular woman was
doing something you liked, for example:
-She was dressed tastefully not slutty.
-She was in middle of giving a compliment to her friend.
-She wasn’t rudely shoving through the crowd but instead was politely moving through.
-Etc., etc., etc.
You could even LATER use this "marry" topic
as a way to sprinkle in a little more info
on the GOOD QUALITIES you seek in a woman,
all without getting TOO serious in the
conversation, as you can then playfully
go back to the more naughty elements of
the conversation, and then finally
just focus on chilling out together
without chatting much at all, which
is the final level before getting
all-out physical together.
The reasons you choose for your decisions in this game
are what create the humor and also what convey information
about YOUR cool character.
Then, you flip the game, and YOU point out three guys,
and you can always learn more about her from HER
reasons for her decisions on whether to f, marry, or kill
the guy, PLUS you can tease her on her answers.
This gives her a chance to express her OWN sexuality
and her own preferences for what is important to her
in relationships as well, you are getting a woman to
lower her guard and be EXTREMELY revealing
sexually with you in terms of what turns her on,
and if you ask the right questions and lead her
properly, you are also learning what makes her feel
loved as well, all of which is PURE GOLD that
you can use to attract her, seduce her, and make
her crazy in love with you.
And you can MODIFY this game so you can play
it anywhere, by changing the “f**k” to “sleep with”,
and you can change the “kill” to “punch” or “slap”,
etc ,etc. And you can CERTAINLY play this game
after breaking the ice with something a little more
neutral like a comment on the magazine she is
reading or something else she is doing or something
else that is going on in the environment.
But overall, compare playing THIS GAME with
a woman you just met, with the TYPICAL approach
that a guy will do, if he even approaches her at all,
with the all-too-common, “So, you come here often?”
How much CHARACTER and personality does
that reveal, by just asking a woman “So, come
here often?”
It reveals NOTHING, plus it’s BORING.
The fact of the matter is, men and women ARE
sexual. We DO have passions, we DO want to
laugh, we DO want to have fun, we also have
things we can’t STAND, and it FEELS good
to be able to CONNECT with the opposite
sex in a way that is IMMEDIATELY
relevant! It feels good not only for YOU,
but it feels good also for HER!
For once, she can talk about sexual things,
she can talk about passionate things, she
can LAUGH, she can tell you the things
about a guy she can’t STAND, she can
do all this within MOMENTS with YOU,
a total stranger, because you have MADE
IT EASY for her to do so.
Plus, by doing all this, you IMMEDIATELY
convey that you are a man who UNDERSTANDS
women, who understands the whole sexual
dynamic, and that you are a guy who is so
comfortable with all this that clearly you
must have an abundance of choice of
women in your life.
And that in itself is attractive as well, since
it implies you are already “chosen” by
women; it gives you the all powerful
“social proof”.
On the OTHER HAND, if you are so worried
about not coming across as a psycho, you will
NEVER do any of this!! You might not even make
any APPROACH to any woman whatsoever!
Trust me, just because most men do not do the
random approaches, does NOT mean that it
doesn’t work.
Let me PROVE it to you:
If a total STRANGER came up to you on the
street, with a huge CHUNK of PURE GOLD,
and told you he is GIVING it to you, and then
he gave it to you, and then he left, would you
somehow THROW OUT that gold????????
Would you say to yourself, “This isn’t TYPICAL,
this MUST be fake gold, so I am going to
throw it OUT”????????????????????????????
You would NOT do that.
You MIGHT be a bit skeptical, you might even
be suspicious, but you would WANT the gold
in case it IS gold, right?
It’s the EXACT SAME THING with approaching
women, but even EASIER because it’s not so
out of the ordinary as most guys think.
The truth is, especially with attractive women,
over the course of their lives they HAVE
been approached many times, and their
attractive FRIENDS have been approached
many times, and between them and their
friends, they KNOW of several success stories
where the men and women ended up not only
hooking up, but often having great relationships
as well.
These women just don’t go AROUND telling
everyone that the men they met were total
strangers, but all their BEST friends know!
This is yet again another example of how some
guys are “inside” the circle of knowledge of
what REALLY goes on, and other guys are on
the “outside” and have no clue. I used to be
on the outside, and it SUCKED.
And once you’re in, you realize how crazy it
is to be living on the outside in ignorance.
However, just like the GOLD example, there
needs to be a certain amount of TRUST built
up in the interaction to OVERCOME the
perfectly normal CAUTIOUSNESS that
most women have regarding meeting men
who are total strangers.
THIS is a huge part of the ART of learning
how to successfully approach women, it’s
not just the act of approaching them, but also
the art of building up a connection, a sense
of trust as well.
But this is NOT that hard to learn, (stay tuned
to the end of this newsletter for more on how
to learn how to do this as well as learn the
ENTIRE "nitty gritty" of pick-up) and it CERTAINLY
is not a reason to let MILLIONS of gorgeous women
just slip through your fingers!
A woman having a bit of CAUTION is very
different from a woman not being OPEN to
the idea.
In fact, meeting the seductive mysterious stranger
is one of the BIGGEST FANTASIES that women
have.
Do the approach right, and you are catering
to her biggest desire, and she is now rooting
for you and will do everything in HER power
to help you SUCCEED in picking her up!
For example, if she is around friends, she will
ask her friends for some privacy, or even
find a reason for you and her to move away
from her friends for more privacy.
So don’t let the fear of coming across as a
psycho stop you from making the approach,
and don’t let it stop you from making your
approach have a fun, sexual, intriguing
VIBE to it!
By incorporating some sexual vibe to your
conversation, and by doing it playfully
as described in the example above, you are
allowing her to bridge into becoming sexual
with you in a very SMOOTH WAY.
It allows you to get closer to her without her
wondering what is going on. She will KNOW
what is going on, she will KNOW the dynamic
is SEXUAL.
It allows you to do things like graze your leg
against hers lightly if she is sitting across
from you in the next bar stool, it allows
you to touch her hair and compliment her
on how soft it is, without seeming creepy,
because you have already got her laughing
and having a good time and not feeling
like she needs to pretend that she is not
a sexual person with you.
Plus, another advantage of that game I
explained is that you can WALK AROUND
the location as you play and as you look
for people, and as you walk around, you
can ALSO find a great place for BOTH of
you to sit to then CONTINUE the chat
and continue to escalate the interaction
in a sexual way.
And that is just one fantastic example of a great
strategy applying the concept of being more sexual,
more playful, and leading the way in the pick-up.
So what you have just read, as you can tell,
comes from REAL WORLD experience.
This isn’t stuff I dreamed up that just sounds nice.
It’s what works to get men and women together
EFFECTIVELY, even if they were total strangers
when they met.
This is the true NITTY GRITTY of “pick–up”.
To learn the FULL picture on the NITTY GRITTY
of pick-up, I SERIOUSLY suggest that you download
my ATTRACTION MASTERY PROGRAM.
This program is approximately TWELVE HOURS
of CREAM-OF-THE-CROP strategies on how to
stop any woman ANYWHERE and have her
screaming your name in passion in bed in the
absolute fastest time possible.
And as powerful as today’s newsletter is, it
just comprises a few MOMENTS of the
HOURS AND HOURS OF PURE GOLD
in this program.
It’s at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
If you want to have the absolute maximum CHOICE
when it comes to women, get this program NOW.
Does this program cost a bit more than some
other programs out there?
Yes it does.
Is it worth every penny?
It’s worth TEN TIMES the cost, and that is not
me being dramatic. This program is absolutely
worth TEN TIMES the cost because it is the most
effective program out there for ensuring your
success when it comes to "picking up women".
This program gives you the exact DETAILS
for what to do.
This program is being used by men all over
the globe to attract the women they want,
and I continue to receive testimonials from
men praising this program and how it is
working for them.
It works for them, and it will work for you too.
You have my word on it, and I take my word
very seriously.
Again, it's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
And if you haven't yet downloaded my book,
The Dating Wizard, then DEFINITELY DO THAT
FIRST. Before anything else, before any
of my other programs.
This book forms the foundation for your
success with women. It is ABSOLUTELY
essential.
It's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Wizard.html
***ABOUT THE LIVE-BOOTCAMPS***
Live bootcamps are currently booked through
January 2013, but at this moment there is still
a chance to reserve a bootcamp for mid-to-late
February.
Bootcamp details are at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/bootcamp-sign-up.html
To find out about all my programs for skyrocketing
your success with women, go here:
http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
Till next time,
Michael Marks
Saturday, September 8, 2012
Approaching And Attracting Women: 7 GOLDEN Tips
There are TONS of crucial insights that I want to
share with you today on successfully approaching
and attracting women who are total strangers.
Please keep in mind that what you are about to
read all comes from REAL LIFE evidence based
on THOUSANDS of examples from my Real World
Bootcamps where the goal is simple:
Teach men how to approach and attract women,
anywhere, instantly- and get live results
on women that they can see immediately.
So every word you are about to see has been
examined and cross-examined in REAL LIFE
from every angle for ACCURACY and TRUTH.
Here we go:
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER ONE:
CONVEY AUTHORITY
When you are approaching a woman at a place
that is NOT an official ‘meat-market’, she is
far more likely to wonder what’s going on than
if you approached her at a dance club or some
other venue that is all about mingling with new
people.
So, therefore, it’s important that you BYPASS
this potential problem IMMEDIATELY by
pouring on the AUTHORITY in your tonality
and in your mannerisms.
Remember, this is NOT a club where it’s all
about socializing. And you do NOT want to
come across as a weirdo OR as desperate.
You avoid all these problems by pouring on the
authority.
In bootcamp, a lot of guys ask me, “But is it
NORMAL for this to happen? Won’t she
still wonder what the heck is going on?”
The answer is that when you come in with
AUTHORITY, she’s not wondering ANYTHING!
INSTEAD, she is FEELING one thing that can be
summed up as the following statement in her mind:
“It’s important that I LISTEN to what this guy
has to say.”
I didn’t say she wants to make LOVE right away.
But she DOES feel it’s important to GENUINELY
listen to what you have to SAY.
And that’s all you NEED, because this buys you
an IN to the conversation, and sets the foundation
right for all the right vibes of you being ‘the man’.
This is another reason why coming to Bootcamp
is so powerful, because experiencing and seeing
and hearing everything live helps you immediately
“get” exactly what I am saying here.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER TWO:
DON’T START WITH A SMILE
This is simple and related to number one, but it’s
very important.
If you are in a party atmosphere, then you can
smile, but if you are in a non-social atmosphere,
then starting with a smile just says all the wrong
things and can, ironically, creep her out.
This is why I say OBLITERATE the smile for
the first few moments, until SHE starts to really
dig into the conversation herself.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER THREE:
DON’T START WITH QUESTIONS, ESPECIALLY BORING ONES
When you approach a woman who is a total
stranger, you need to convey in indirect ways
who YOU are before you can expect her to
do anything for YOU.
That just makes perfect sense, doesn’t it?
So instead, start with a COMMENT about something
RELEVANT, and make that comment interesting.
For example, at this time of year, if you were
in a busy store in a mall, it could be a comment
about ‘how important it is to not forget that behind
all the things people are buying, should be the
THOUGHT and the GENUINE caring for another
human being, as opposed to emphasizing the
material elements’.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER FOUR:
LISTEN, AND LISTEN WELL
Then, when she comments back to you, you LISTEN
to whatever she is saying, and you ‘pick up’ on what
she is saying.
Remember, if you want to ‘pick up’ a girl, then forget
the pick up lines and instead focus to ‘pick-up’ ON
what she is saying!
Her feedback to you is CRUCIAL for how you respond. This is where the "pick up line" mentality ruins guys, because men get caught up on their memorized pick up lines and in performing an "act", that they forget to LISTEN and to be in the MOMENT!
So let’s say she says back to you something like:
“Yes, it is so important, I just came back from
visiting so-and-so country/city/family/friend
and they/it/he/she said xyz that made me realize
abc.”
Now, with this, you have a ton to reply back to her with that actually connects specifically with HER as opposed to any other woman in the world.
So now YOU stand out as being a lot more than just
another guy who spits out pick up lines to women.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER FIVE:
GIVE HER GENUINE, MEANINGFUL VALIDATION
It’s important to understand here that you are dealing
with a woman who is a TOTAL stranger, so social skills must be super POLISHED in order to quickly bridge the distance from stranger to man-she-wants-to-know.
Human communication, at its emotional primal roots, is really about confirmation.
It’s the reason behind the social greeting and response of “hello”.
The real point behind “hello” and “how are you” and
“very well, thanks” between total strangers is not
necessarily to ask all the details, but to CONFIRM
each other’s WORTH.
This is known as confirming feedback, confirming each other socially, and this is the REAL point of mutual “hellos”.
Well, to AMPLIFY the effect of this confirmation, you
want to find a MEANINGFUL way of expressing it.
You do this by listening to what she is saying so you can find something you GENUINELY respect about her, and you then express that.
So, for example, let’s say it’s Friday night at the mall,
bookstore, and there are tons of people around because the movie theater is nearby and most people are seeing movies.
And this woman is checking out books by herself.
You approach her, with the right authority, you make
a comment that is relevant, she gives you feedback,
and then discover that she is genuinely looking for
a book for herself for enjoyment, and that this is the
reason she came out tonight.
You might GENUINELY VALIDATE her with
something like this:
“Oh, you’re actually here for yourself on a Friday night? You’re definitely not the kind of person that conforms and just follows the crowd. You’re independent minded and think for yourself.”
Here’s the other thing too:
Once you detect that a woman has something positive you respect about her, well THEN it’s okay to ask a question, such as, “How did you get to know so much about xyz topic?”
She will very likely ENJOY telling you the answer.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER SIX:
IT’S STILL ALL SEXUAL
This is one of those things that’s all INTERNAL.
You don’t SAY sexual things to her in a place that
is not a nightclub designed for making out and
dancing, but you SHOULD be in a sexual state.
This means that in your mind, you are not
ASHAMED of the fact you are approaching
her because you find her ATTRACTIVE.
It ALSO means, that in a subtle way, through
your demeanor and expression and tonality,
that you are suggesting that all this small talk
is your way of showing RESPECT.
This is a very important distinction.
You see, it should be that you COULD go right
up to her and be DIRECT and say, “Hi, I wanted
to get to learn more about you since I found you
attractive and would like to know if we could
get along and if we share core values” but the
reason you don’t do this is not because YOU
don’t have the guts to be direct, it’s because
you know that this is simply too direct for our
culture.
But, at YOUR emotional CORE, YOU should
be feeling this matter-of-fact-direct about the
whole interaction.
YOU realize that this more elaborate way of
approaching a woman that I am describing is
the way to SUCCESFFULY do it, however
you also know that I am telling you that
DEEP DOWN, a woman DOES know what
is going on, she just APPRECIATES the
fact that you are RESPECTING THE DAMN
PROCESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YES, THE TRUTH IS A WOMAN INDEED
WOULD LIKE TO SKIP RIGHT TO THE FUN
STUFF!!!!
HOWEVER, SHE ALSO FEELS THIS IS
WAYYYYYYYY TOO RISKY AND THAT
THE MORE ELABORATE PROCESS IS
SAFER.
Okay, that is the culture we live in, alright?
So let’s show some respect for the PROCESS.
Because ultimately, if you do want her to enjoy
screaming your name in delight in bed, then you
will respect the process that WORKS to get that
result.
At the same time, your EMOTIONAL state is
still sexual, you are NOT just trying to have
a conversation, in your mind indeed IS the
fact that she IS a woman and you are a man.
This conversation stuff is just you showing
respect for the PROCESS. But underneath
it all is the sexual animal.
This mindset DOES affect your expressions,
your tonality, and your behavior in all the
right ways, and a woman WILL register them
ALL as well subconsciously, and these are all
GOOD things for increasing her attraction.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER SEVEN:
SPRINKLE IN SOME CONFIDENT PLAYFULNESS
At any point in this interaction, feel free to
sprinkle in some PLAYFULNESS.
I said SPRINKLE, not DROWN.
So, for example, even at a meaningful moment such
as you and her speaking about caring about a fellow
human being, you could still playfully say..
“Of course, charity begins at home, so I always make
sure to get myself something fun too..”
And this could even lead to a bit more playfulness:
“If you’re a good girl, you might even get my number.”
SPRINKLE with confident playfulness, and she feels you are a fun, confident guy.
DROWN with confident playfulness, and she figures you are immature or arrogant.
A man with real confidence does not need to constantly suggest he is desirable.
And if you are reading this right now, and would like
to get the FULL PICTURE on how to approach women
successfully, I suggest you download my program
"Attraction Accelerators" IMMEDIATELY.
This program will show you the most powerful ways
to attract women QUICKLY when you approach them.
Speed in creating attraction is crucial, because there
is only a small window of time where a woman remains RECEPTIVE to a man's approach.
If you don't attract her QUICKLY, the window CLOSES and the opportunity is GONE.
Learn to MASTER the skill of approaching women by
downloading this program NOW.
It's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/attraction-accelerators.html
Then, take it your training to the next level by learning
"hands-on" directly from me in my exclusive 1-On-1
program called "The Real World Bootcamp".
In this live program, I coach you on women in coffee
shops, trains, buses, bookstores, lounges, and tons
of other places!
I’ve been coaching men in this program for ten YEARS.
That means you get to learn from an EXPERIENCED
coach who can "show you the ropes" and ensure
that you master these skills as quickly as possible.
This program is at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
And to check out all my other programs for skyrocketing your success with women, go here:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
Till next time,
Michael Marks
share with you today on successfully approaching
and attracting women who are total strangers.
Please keep in mind that what you are about to
read all comes from REAL LIFE evidence based
on THOUSANDS of examples from my Real World
Bootcamps where the goal is simple:
Teach men how to approach and attract women,
anywhere, instantly- and get live results
on women that they can see immediately.
So every word you are about to see has been
examined and cross-examined in REAL LIFE
from every angle for ACCURACY and TRUTH.
Here we go:
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER ONE:
CONVEY AUTHORITY
When you are approaching a woman at a place
that is NOT an official ‘meat-market’, she is
far more likely to wonder what’s going on than
if you approached her at a dance club or some
other venue that is all about mingling with new
people.
So, therefore, it’s important that you BYPASS
this potential problem IMMEDIATELY by
pouring on the AUTHORITY in your tonality
and in your mannerisms.
Remember, this is NOT a club where it’s all
about socializing. And you do NOT want to
come across as a weirdo OR as desperate.
You avoid all these problems by pouring on the
authority.
In bootcamp, a lot of guys ask me, “But is it
NORMAL for this to happen? Won’t she
still wonder what the heck is going on?”
The answer is that when you come in with
AUTHORITY, she’s not wondering ANYTHING!
INSTEAD, she is FEELING one thing that can be
summed up as the following statement in her mind:
“It’s important that I LISTEN to what this guy
has to say.”
I didn’t say she wants to make LOVE right away.
But she DOES feel it’s important to GENUINELY
listen to what you have to SAY.
And that’s all you NEED, because this buys you
an IN to the conversation, and sets the foundation
right for all the right vibes of you being ‘the man’.
This is another reason why coming to Bootcamp
is so powerful, because experiencing and seeing
and hearing everything live helps you immediately
“get” exactly what I am saying here.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER TWO:
DON’T START WITH A SMILE
This is simple and related to number one, but it’s
very important.
If you are in a party atmosphere, then you can
smile, but if you are in a non-social atmosphere,
then starting with a smile just says all the wrong
things and can, ironically, creep her out.
This is why I say OBLITERATE the smile for
the first few moments, until SHE starts to really
dig into the conversation herself.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER THREE:
DON’T START WITH QUESTIONS, ESPECIALLY BORING ONES
When you approach a woman who is a total
stranger, you need to convey in indirect ways
who YOU are before you can expect her to
do anything for YOU.
That just makes perfect sense, doesn’t it?
So instead, start with a COMMENT about something
RELEVANT, and make that comment interesting.
For example, at this time of year, if you were
in a busy store in a mall, it could be a comment
about ‘how important it is to not forget that behind
all the things people are buying, should be the
THOUGHT and the GENUINE caring for another
human being, as opposed to emphasizing the
material elements’.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER FOUR:
LISTEN, AND LISTEN WELL
Then, when she comments back to you, you LISTEN
to whatever she is saying, and you ‘pick up’ on what
she is saying.
Remember, if you want to ‘pick up’ a girl, then forget
the pick up lines and instead focus to ‘pick-up’ ON
what she is saying!
Her feedback to you is CRUCIAL for how you respond. This is where the "pick up line" mentality ruins guys, because men get caught up on their memorized pick up lines and in performing an "act", that they forget to LISTEN and to be in the MOMENT!
So let’s say she says back to you something like:
“Yes, it is so important, I just came back from
visiting so-and-so country/city/family/friend
and they/it/he/she said xyz that made me realize
abc.”
Now, with this, you have a ton to reply back to her with that actually connects specifically with HER as opposed to any other woman in the world.
So now YOU stand out as being a lot more than just
another guy who spits out pick up lines to women.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER FIVE:
GIVE HER GENUINE, MEANINGFUL VALIDATION
It’s important to understand here that you are dealing
with a woman who is a TOTAL stranger, so social skills must be super POLISHED in order to quickly bridge the distance from stranger to man-she-wants-to-know.
Human communication, at its emotional primal roots, is really about confirmation.
It’s the reason behind the social greeting and response of “hello”.
The real point behind “hello” and “how are you” and
“very well, thanks” between total strangers is not
necessarily to ask all the details, but to CONFIRM
each other’s WORTH.
This is known as confirming feedback, confirming each other socially, and this is the REAL point of mutual “hellos”.
Well, to AMPLIFY the effect of this confirmation, you
want to find a MEANINGFUL way of expressing it.
You do this by listening to what she is saying so you can find something you GENUINELY respect about her, and you then express that.
So, for example, let’s say it’s Friday night at the mall,
bookstore, and there are tons of people around because the movie theater is nearby and most people are seeing movies.
And this woman is checking out books by herself.
You approach her, with the right authority, you make
a comment that is relevant, she gives you feedback,
and then discover that she is genuinely looking for
a book for herself for enjoyment, and that this is the
reason she came out tonight.
You might GENUINELY VALIDATE her with
something like this:
“Oh, you’re actually here for yourself on a Friday night? You’re definitely not the kind of person that conforms and just follows the crowd. You’re independent minded and think for yourself.”
Here’s the other thing too:
Once you detect that a woman has something positive you respect about her, well THEN it’s okay to ask a question, such as, “How did you get to know so much about xyz topic?”
She will very likely ENJOY telling you the answer.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER SIX:
IT’S STILL ALL SEXUAL
This is one of those things that’s all INTERNAL.
You don’t SAY sexual things to her in a place that
is not a nightclub designed for making out and
dancing, but you SHOULD be in a sexual state.
This means that in your mind, you are not
ASHAMED of the fact you are approaching
her because you find her ATTRACTIVE.
It ALSO means, that in a subtle way, through
your demeanor and expression and tonality,
that you are suggesting that all this small talk
is your way of showing RESPECT.
This is a very important distinction.
You see, it should be that you COULD go right
up to her and be DIRECT and say, “Hi, I wanted
to get to learn more about you since I found you
attractive and would like to know if we could
get along and if we share core values” but the
reason you don’t do this is not because YOU
don’t have the guts to be direct, it’s because
you know that this is simply too direct for our
culture.
But, at YOUR emotional CORE, YOU should
be feeling this matter-of-fact-direct about the
whole interaction.
YOU realize that this more elaborate way of
approaching a woman that I am describing is
the way to SUCCESFFULY do it, however
you also know that I am telling you that
DEEP DOWN, a woman DOES know what
is going on, she just APPRECIATES the
fact that you are RESPECTING THE DAMN
PROCESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YES, THE TRUTH IS A WOMAN INDEED
WOULD LIKE TO SKIP RIGHT TO THE FUN
STUFF!!!!
HOWEVER, SHE ALSO FEELS THIS IS
WAYYYYYYYY TOO RISKY AND THAT
THE MORE ELABORATE PROCESS IS
SAFER.
Okay, that is the culture we live in, alright?
So let’s show some respect for the PROCESS.
Because ultimately, if you do want her to enjoy
screaming your name in delight in bed, then you
will respect the process that WORKS to get that
result.
At the same time, your EMOTIONAL state is
still sexual, you are NOT just trying to have
a conversation, in your mind indeed IS the
fact that she IS a woman and you are a man.
This conversation stuff is just you showing
respect for the PROCESS. But underneath
it all is the sexual animal.
This mindset DOES affect your expressions,
your tonality, and your behavior in all the
right ways, and a woman WILL register them
ALL as well subconsciously, and these are all
GOOD things for increasing her attraction.
HOW TO APPROACH WOMEN TIP NUMBER SEVEN:
SPRINKLE IN SOME CONFIDENT PLAYFULNESS
At any point in this interaction, feel free to
sprinkle in some PLAYFULNESS.
I said SPRINKLE, not DROWN.
So, for example, even at a meaningful moment such
as you and her speaking about caring about a fellow
human being, you could still playfully say..
“Of course, charity begins at home, so I always make
sure to get myself something fun too..”
And this could even lead to a bit more playfulness:
“If you’re a good girl, you might even get my number.”
SPRINKLE with confident playfulness, and she feels you are a fun, confident guy.
DROWN with confident playfulness, and she figures you are immature or arrogant.
A man with real confidence does not need to constantly suggest he is desirable.
And if you are reading this right now, and would like
to get the FULL PICTURE on how to approach women
successfully, I suggest you download my program
"Attraction Accelerators" IMMEDIATELY.
This program will show you the most powerful ways
to attract women QUICKLY when you approach them.
Speed in creating attraction is crucial, because there
is only a small window of time where a woman remains RECEPTIVE to a man's approach.
If you don't attract her QUICKLY, the window CLOSES and the opportunity is GONE.
Learn to MASTER the skill of approaching women by
downloading this program NOW.
It's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/attraction-accelerators.html
Then, take it your training to the next level by learning
"hands-on" directly from me in my exclusive 1-On-1
program called "The Real World Bootcamp".
In this live program, I coach you on women in coffee
shops, trains, buses, bookstores, lounges, and tons
of other places!
I’ve been coaching men in this program for ten YEARS.
That means you get to learn from an EXPERIENCED
coach who can "show you the ropes" and ensure
that you master these skills as quickly as possible.
This program is at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html
And to check out all my other programs for skyrocketing your success with women, go here:
http://www.getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php
Till next time,
Michael Marks
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Immediately Applicable Ways To Pick Up Any Woman
I'd like to give you some practical tips on how to be
successful with women, from pick up to dating to
relationships.
A lot of guys think that nice guys finish last.
The problem is that YES, if a guy is "nice" from a
place of WEAKNESS, he will finish last. And
so many guys DO behave in a submissive way
with women, so they DO finish last.
The thing is, as guys, we have been BRAINWASHED
by so many forces in our culture to actually think
that putting women on a pedestal is the right thing
to do, no matter what. We're told by our moms
that women love a guy who is all into them, who
will never take them for granted, etc etc. We're
told by movies, it seems that women love the
good guy, etc.
Well, the problem is that this is simply unbalanced
information. Women of course DO want to be
treated well, but it has to be by someone who is
a STRONG man. I don't mean with huge muscles,
although working out is always nice, I mean
that he is STRONG in the sense of not NEEDING
her, in the sense of having a SECURE identity,
in the sense of him having a secure sense of
humor, and in the sense of LEADING the show
in the interaction.
And since so many guys are NOT this way, the
JERKS often win by DEFAULT simply because
jerks have no apology, they lead the show, go
for what they want, and don't seem needy at all,
and have a life of their own. Yet none of these
things are jerky--it's only the ABUSE that's
wrong, it's not the JERKY stuff they do that's
attractive, it's the MANLY stuff they do that's
attractive, and you can do that AND be a good
guy and do better with women than any jerk.
So let's say you are taking a walk and reach
a stoplight and the light is red and there is
a woman you'd like to talk to standing there
near you. The longer you WAIT to say something
the WEAKER you seem because it becomes
obvious after 30 seconds of silence that you
were THINKING of the perfect opener, and
that means you were making a BIG DEAL
about the fact she is there. Why is she
such a big deal relative to who YOU ARE?
Making a big deal about a woman might SEEM
to be nice, but it's not, what it really is doing
is making YOU seem to be LESS than her,
so what is so nice about telling a woman she
should be with a guy who is LESS worthy
than SHE is???
Wouldn't it be NICER to be the guy who is
JUST as desirable if not MORE, who is
STILL interested in her? Wouldn't that make
her feel BETTER, THAT SHE IS GETTING
SOMETHING out of this too?
So, by starting the conversation RIGHT AWAY,
you are showing MORE VALUE about yourself,
more confidence in yourself, and this makes HER
feel better, as everyone wants MORE value in their
life, not less. You don't want a woman to be
NICE to you, you want her to WANT you.
You don't want her to have SYMPATHY, you
want her to feel ATTRACTION. So by relying
on being "nice" and submissive and coming across
as unworthy, you are relying on her SYMPATHY.
When you are coming across as VALUABLE,
you are triggering ATTRACTION.
So let's go through some common ways of
showing MORE value:
THE WAY TO BE PLAYFUL
So let's go back to the example of the woman
at the traffic light standing beside you.
You already know that you have to say something
right away, right?
And you know that kissing up is not cool either.
And you know that showing an awesome state
of mind is very cool.
So whatever the situation is, there is a way to
respond that is very cool.
Let's say it's raining LIGHTLY, and you have
an umbrella and she doesn't. You could in a
PLAYFUL way say to her "poor you, I feel so
bad for you, but not THAT bad to give you my
umbrella!".
THE RIGHT INTENT IN YOUR VOICE
If this is said with the right INTENT in your
voice, she will LAUGH because it's funny,
but she will also see that you are a cool guy
that is not NEEDING her so badly like
every OTHER guy. This is a sign of
STRENGTH, it's simply ATTRACTIVE.
This doesn't mean that later on when dating
her that you should not show her that you like
her- that's where a lot of guys make mistakes,
they don't realize that getting to know a
woman and the way you interact with her
is an evolving thing, it's not always the
same thing. And rewarding good behavior
is not the same as kissing up.
Let's say it's not raining, but you are both
waiting for the light. You can tease her
that she is JINXING the light to stay red
and not turn and that it must be her fault
because you are always at that light
and it never takes this long.
CONTINUE THE CONVERSATION
BY USING HER OWN RESPONSE
AS YOUR FUEL FOR YOUR RESPONSE!
And no matter what she says back to you,
you USE what she says as FUEL for
responding BACK to her, like a ping-pong
game. So if she says "How could I be
jinxing the light?? Why would I do that?"
You can then playfully respond with:
"Oh of course, the cover-up, you're an
EXPERT at this, with an alibi and totally
looking innocent and everything!"
INCORPORATE PLAYFUL ROLE PLAYING
She might then say something like
"haha" and then you use THAT by
saying "Don't think that laughing will
get you off the hook! You're like
a super villain here, using your
psychic powers or whatever to
control the traffic lights!"
SHIFT INTO A "REAL" CONVERSATION
Another thing is that you have to know when
to SHIFT GEARS. Too often, if a guy GETS
to the point that the girl is laughing and having
a good time, he doesn't want to STOP doing
the playful stuff, but it's important to MOVE
the interaction AHEAD into the zone of
actually having a conversation where you
both share real opinions, perspectives, etc.
Otherwise, she will feel she never got to know
you at all, and that you are ONLY playful,
and perhaps don't have a "deeper" side to you.
So, again using this example, as the light changes,
and you are both crossing the street, you can
shift gears into more rapport and you can
playfully transition by asking her if she
works in the area and makes a ton of money
so she can take you out to fancy places, etc.
She can then tell you a bit about what she does,
whether she is in school and what she's studying,
or whether she works and what she does or
wants to do in the future as her job.
If you are listening well, you can then tell what
she is passionate about, i.e. teaching children,
and if you share any of her passions, or anything
related, i.e. let's say you work with children,
or let's say you respect great teachers,
you can then have a meaningful conversation,
plus you can chat about your passions, etc.
DON'T SHOW OFF
So many guys though make the mistake of talking
about themselves in a way that shows they are
VERY insecure. For example, as soon as the
woman asks what the guy does, the guy goes
on a whole serious long answer about his
job in a way where he thinks he is being
subtle about how cool or rich or prestigious
or smart he is, and it's obvious what he's
doing, and it looks insecure.
Instead, it's better to talk about the REASONS
you love what you do. And if you don't
love what you do, then focus your convo
on something else. Also, it's always a
fun and playful and cool thing to first
answer the question to what do you do
with something outrageous, simply
because it shows you are not a slave
to that question and that you don't
take yourself so seriously.
So your first answer to what you do could be
something like "I jump out of cakes
at birthday parties" or "you work at
Disneyland as the big bad wolf" etc.
Once you are having a real conversation
and you are in rapport with her, from THERE,
you can take her number or email or sometimes
even go straight for the INSTANT date right then
and there if there is a coffee shop, just tell her
this is a good convo and that you should
both continue it over a coffee! It's all up
to YOU, it's YOUR JOB as the MAN
and she EXPECTS you to do your job,
and the worst is that she declines, perhaps
because she is really busy and late for
work, and in that case you can still take her
number or email and contact her later.
THE RIGHT INTENT
The key is for you to be having the right
INTENT, and that is that you are not being
a jerk, you are simply being a MAN who
is in FULL control of his emotions around
a woman who is attractive and you are not
about to hand over your dignity and life and
emotional stability over to a woman just
because she is there.
FOCUS ON THE MOMENT RATHER
THAN THE OUTCOME
Rather, you ENJOY the fact she is there, and
you ENJOY the moment with her, but you are
not WORRYING about her response-
that's NOT up to you, and you have
learned not to fear WOMEN'S reactions.
You must not be outcome dependent- rather
you must focus on how to enjoy that MOMENT.
It's not about showing her "who's boss" and
it's not about kissing up to her, it's about
you CONVEYING to her that you are in
a great state. And since most guys are in
a terrible state since she is so beautiful
that it makes them uncomfortable, it's
PARTICULARLY cool if you show
her that not only are you in a great state,
but also that you aren't NEEDY for her,
and yet you still may LIKE her all at
the same time.
CONTROLLING THE FRAME
Sometimes a woman will try to SHUT DOWN
your pick-up. This doesn't mean she hates you
or is mean or anything. Some women simply
feel it's their job to be a "good girl" by trying
to make it hard for you to get with her.
Embrace this fact, don't get pissed off about it,
but don't ACCEPT her frame either.
So on one hand, don't get pissed since
getting pissed off about it is EXACTLY
the reaction she has been told is the kind
of guy that just wants to take advantage of her.
So she will feel that you are fitting the stereotype
of a jerk, and feel that she did the right thing.
She expects you to UNDERSTAND that she
needs to act hard to get to be considered a
good girl, good woman, etc.
But at the same time, you can't accept what she
says either or you won't get anywhere, so if she
says something to you during the chat like "I'm really
busy with work, school, etc, I don't have time
to meet guys" don't say "ok".
Instead, PLAYFULLY REFRAME her statement
as a reason for why she SHOULD be chatting with
you.
Tell her, "Well then since you're so busy, clearly
you need a HEALTHY BREAK to be even
MORE productive. And what can be better than
chatting to a super cool guy like myself?"
Not only are you controlling the frame of the situation,
but you are also getting her laughing by this, changing
her internal state to make her even more receptive
to you.
If she says, "My friends would kill me if they
found out I gave number to a guy on the
bus/streetcar/intersection (or whatever else)!"
You can then say "Well, then, all the more
reason to do it! You get to be the NAUGHTY
one who does whatever she wants, and it will
be our seeeecret shhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
And so by starting the conversation RIGHT
AWAY, by looking for the playful angle,
by not kissing up, by not being outcome
dependent, and following all the OTHER
tips above, you are massively increasing
the odds that you are going to GET the
girl.
If you notice, NOTHING mentioned above
has ANYTHING to do with being A JERK.
It has to do with CONVEYING WHO
YOU ARE, and what you are conveying
with these tips is that you are secure,
you are strong, you are fun to be with,
you are witty, you are not needy, and
that you are masculine.
NONE of these things are jerky or "fake".
However, we don't always FEEL all those
cool things, and we don't always know the
best way to CONVEY those things about
ourselves.
But what if there was a way to understand ourselves,
to understand the STRUCTURE of all emotions,
and to understand WOMEN and the PHASES
of the pick-up, so that you could CONSISTENTLY
be READY to take advantage of all the opportunities
to meet women all around you?
What if there was also a way to know what to do
BEYOND the pick-up, to KEEP a woman attracted?
Well now there is a way, and it's all revealed
in perfect clarity and detail in my dating
success program called WARRIOR WITHIN.
This program goes DEEP, into the level of
the MIND for attracting women.
It's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/warrior.html
And if you don't already have my Attraction Mastery program, get that FIRST, at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
If you're just starting out and you haven't
yet downloaded my very first book, called
'The Dating Wizard', then do that NOW.
It's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Wizard.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
successful with women, from pick up to dating to
relationships.
A lot of guys think that nice guys finish last.
The problem is that YES, if a guy is "nice" from a
place of WEAKNESS, he will finish last. And
so many guys DO behave in a submissive way
with women, so they DO finish last.
The thing is, as guys, we have been BRAINWASHED
by so many forces in our culture to actually think
that putting women on a pedestal is the right thing
to do, no matter what. We're told by our moms
that women love a guy who is all into them, who
will never take them for granted, etc etc. We're
told by movies, it seems that women love the
good guy, etc.
Well, the problem is that this is simply unbalanced
information. Women of course DO want to be
treated well, but it has to be by someone who is
a STRONG man. I don't mean with huge muscles,
although working out is always nice, I mean
that he is STRONG in the sense of not NEEDING
her, in the sense of having a SECURE identity,
in the sense of him having a secure sense of
humor, and in the sense of LEADING the show
in the interaction.
And since so many guys are NOT this way, the
JERKS often win by DEFAULT simply because
jerks have no apology, they lead the show, go
for what they want, and don't seem needy at all,
and have a life of their own. Yet none of these
things are jerky--it's only the ABUSE that's
wrong, it's not the JERKY stuff they do that's
attractive, it's the MANLY stuff they do that's
attractive, and you can do that AND be a good
guy and do better with women than any jerk.
So let's say you are taking a walk and reach
a stoplight and the light is red and there is
a woman you'd like to talk to standing there
near you. The longer you WAIT to say something
the WEAKER you seem because it becomes
obvious after 30 seconds of silence that you
were THINKING of the perfect opener, and
that means you were making a BIG DEAL
about the fact she is there. Why is she
such a big deal relative to who YOU ARE?
Making a big deal about a woman might SEEM
to be nice, but it's not, what it really is doing
is making YOU seem to be LESS than her,
so what is so nice about telling a woman she
should be with a guy who is LESS worthy
than SHE is???
Wouldn't it be NICER to be the guy who is
JUST as desirable if not MORE, who is
STILL interested in her? Wouldn't that make
her feel BETTER, THAT SHE IS GETTING
SOMETHING out of this too?
So, by starting the conversation RIGHT AWAY,
you are showing MORE VALUE about yourself,
more confidence in yourself, and this makes HER
feel better, as everyone wants MORE value in their
life, not less. You don't want a woman to be
NICE to you, you want her to WANT you.
You don't want her to have SYMPATHY, you
want her to feel ATTRACTION. So by relying
on being "nice" and submissive and coming across
as unworthy, you are relying on her SYMPATHY.
When you are coming across as VALUABLE,
you are triggering ATTRACTION.
So let's go through some common ways of
showing MORE value:
THE WAY TO BE PLAYFUL
So let's go back to the example of the woman
at the traffic light standing beside you.
You already know that you have to say something
right away, right?
And you know that kissing up is not cool either.
And you know that showing an awesome state
of mind is very cool.
So whatever the situation is, there is a way to
respond that is very cool.
Let's say it's raining LIGHTLY, and you have
an umbrella and she doesn't. You could in a
PLAYFUL way say to her "poor you, I feel so
bad for you, but not THAT bad to give you my
umbrella!".
THE RIGHT INTENT IN YOUR VOICE
If this is said with the right INTENT in your
voice, she will LAUGH because it's funny,
but she will also see that you are a cool guy
that is not NEEDING her so badly like
every OTHER guy. This is a sign of
STRENGTH, it's simply ATTRACTIVE.
This doesn't mean that later on when dating
her that you should not show her that you like
her- that's where a lot of guys make mistakes,
they don't realize that getting to know a
woman and the way you interact with her
is an evolving thing, it's not always the
same thing. And rewarding good behavior
is not the same as kissing up.
Let's say it's not raining, but you are both
waiting for the light. You can tease her
that she is JINXING the light to stay red
and not turn and that it must be her fault
because you are always at that light
and it never takes this long.
CONTINUE THE CONVERSATION
BY USING HER OWN RESPONSE
AS YOUR FUEL FOR YOUR RESPONSE!
And no matter what she says back to you,
you USE what she says as FUEL for
responding BACK to her, like a ping-pong
game. So if she says "How could I be
jinxing the light?? Why would I do that?"
You can then playfully respond with:
"Oh of course, the cover-up, you're an
EXPERT at this, with an alibi and totally
looking innocent and everything!"
INCORPORATE PLAYFUL ROLE PLAYING
She might then say something like
"haha" and then you use THAT by
saying "Don't think that laughing will
get you off the hook! You're like
a super villain here, using your
psychic powers or whatever to
control the traffic lights!"
SHIFT INTO A "REAL" CONVERSATION
Another thing is that you have to know when
to SHIFT GEARS. Too often, if a guy GETS
to the point that the girl is laughing and having
a good time, he doesn't want to STOP doing
the playful stuff, but it's important to MOVE
the interaction AHEAD into the zone of
actually having a conversation where you
both share real opinions, perspectives, etc.
Otherwise, she will feel she never got to know
you at all, and that you are ONLY playful,
and perhaps don't have a "deeper" side to you.
So, again using this example, as the light changes,
and you are both crossing the street, you can
shift gears into more rapport and you can
playfully transition by asking her if she
works in the area and makes a ton of money
so she can take you out to fancy places, etc.
She can then tell you a bit about what she does,
whether she is in school and what she's studying,
or whether she works and what she does or
wants to do in the future as her job.
If you are listening well, you can then tell what
she is passionate about, i.e. teaching children,
and if you share any of her passions, or anything
related, i.e. let's say you work with children,
or let's say you respect great teachers,
you can then have a meaningful conversation,
plus you can chat about your passions, etc.
DON'T SHOW OFF
So many guys though make the mistake of talking
about themselves in a way that shows they are
VERY insecure. For example, as soon as the
woman asks what the guy does, the guy goes
on a whole serious long answer about his
job in a way where he thinks he is being
subtle about how cool or rich or prestigious
or smart he is, and it's obvious what he's
doing, and it looks insecure.
Instead, it's better to talk about the REASONS
you love what you do. And if you don't
love what you do, then focus your convo
on something else. Also, it's always a
fun and playful and cool thing to first
answer the question to what do you do
with something outrageous, simply
because it shows you are not a slave
to that question and that you don't
take yourself so seriously.
So your first answer to what you do could be
something like "I jump out of cakes
at birthday parties" or "you work at
Disneyland as the big bad wolf" etc.
Once you are having a real conversation
and you are in rapport with her, from THERE,
you can take her number or email or sometimes
even go straight for the INSTANT date right then
and there if there is a coffee shop, just tell her
this is a good convo and that you should
both continue it over a coffee! It's all up
to YOU, it's YOUR JOB as the MAN
and she EXPECTS you to do your job,
and the worst is that she declines, perhaps
because she is really busy and late for
work, and in that case you can still take her
number or email and contact her later.
THE RIGHT INTENT
The key is for you to be having the right
INTENT, and that is that you are not being
a jerk, you are simply being a MAN who
is in FULL control of his emotions around
a woman who is attractive and you are not
about to hand over your dignity and life and
emotional stability over to a woman just
because she is there.
FOCUS ON THE MOMENT RATHER
THAN THE OUTCOME
Rather, you ENJOY the fact she is there, and
you ENJOY the moment with her, but you are
not WORRYING about her response-
that's NOT up to you, and you have
learned not to fear WOMEN'S reactions.
You must not be outcome dependent- rather
you must focus on how to enjoy that MOMENT.
It's not about showing her "who's boss" and
it's not about kissing up to her, it's about
you CONVEYING to her that you are in
a great state. And since most guys are in
a terrible state since she is so beautiful
that it makes them uncomfortable, it's
PARTICULARLY cool if you show
her that not only are you in a great state,
but also that you aren't NEEDY for her,
and yet you still may LIKE her all at
the same time.
CONTROLLING THE FRAME
Sometimes a woman will try to SHUT DOWN
your pick-up. This doesn't mean she hates you
or is mean or anything. Some women simply
feel it's their job to be a "good girl" by trying
to make it hard for you to get with her.
Embrace this fact, don't get pissed off about it,
but don't ACCEPT her frame either.
So on one hand, don't get pissed since
getting pissed off about it is EXACTLY
the reaction she has been told is the kind
of guy that just wants to take advantage of her.
So she will feel that you are fitting the stereotype
of a jerk, and feel that she did the right thing.
She expects you to UNDERSTAND that she
needs to act hard to get to be considered a
good girl, good woman, etc.
But at the same time, you can't accept what she
says either or you won't get anywhere, so if she
says something to you during the chat like "I'm really
busy with work, school, etc, I don't have time
to meet guys" don't say "ok".
Instead, PLAYFULLY REFRAME her statement
as a reason for why she SHOULD be chatting with
you.
Tell her, "Well then since you're so busy, clearly
you need a HEALTHY BREAK to be even
MORE productive. And what can be better than
chatting to a super cool guy like myself?"
Not only are you controlling the frame of the situation,
but you are also getting her laughing by this, changing
her internal state to make her even more receptive
to you.
If she says, "My friends would kill me if they
found out I gave number to a guy on the
bus/streetcar/intersection (or whatever else)!"
You can then say "Well, then, all the more
reason to do it! You get to be the NAUGHTY
one who does whatever she wants, and it will
be our seeeecret shhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
And so by starting the conversation RIGHT
AWAY, by looking for the playful angle,
by not kissing up, by not being outcome
dependent, and following all the OTHER
tips above, you are massively increasing
the odds that you are going to GET the
girl.
If you notice, NOTHING mentioned above
has ANYTHING to do with being A JERK.
It has to do with CONVEYING WHO
YOU ARE, and what you are conveying
with these tips is that you are secure,
you are strong, you are fun to be with,
you are witty, you are not needy, and
that you are masculine.
NONE of these things are jerky or "fake".
However, we don't always FEEL all those
cool things, and we don't always know the
best way to CONVEY those things about
ourselves.
But what if there was a way to understand ourselves,
to understand the STRUCTURE of all emotions,
and to understand WOMEN and the PHASES
of the pick-up, so that you could CONSISTENTLY
be READY to take advantage of all the opportunities
to meet women all around you?
What if there was also a way to know what to do
BEYOND the pick-up, to KEEP a woman attracted?
Well now there is a way, and it's all revealed
in perfect clarity and detail in my dating
success program called WARRIOR WITHIN.
This program goes DEEP, into the level of
the MIND for attracting women.
It's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/warrior.html
And if you don't already have my Attraction Mastery program, get that FIRST, at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html
If you're just starting out and you haven't
yet downloaded my very first book, called
'The Dating Wizard', then do that NOW.
It's at:
http://getagreatgirl.com/Wizard.html
Till next time,
Michael Marks
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