Should You Smile When You Approach Women?

I want to share something very important
for your success when it comes to approaching
and attracting women who are total strangers.

There are a LOT of people out there who
SWEAR that it is super important for men
to SMILE at women when the men approach
these women to chat them up.

There are ALSO a LOT of people out there
who SWEAR that smiling at women makes
the men seem weak, desperate, and not
dominant.

It's because of these kinds of conflicting
views that I had to spend YEARS of my own
life actually GOING OUT THERE and approaching
thousands of women who were total strangers in
just about EVERY kind of situation and environment,
from seeing a woman on a frozen winter day
walking along the sidewalk, to approaching
women in malls and cafes, to approaching
women in bars and clubs and lounges,
to approaching women on public transit,
and even in places like hotel lobbies
and airports and tons of other places
as well.

So let me CLEAR UP this whole question on
whether men should smile or not when they
approach women.

There are two levels to this answer.
The first level goes DEEP:

There are literally hundreds of thousands of
SUBTLETIES that are implied in the varied
NUANCES of any human expression.

So, it is very possible to SMILE at a woman
in a way that STILL conveys confidence
and power and sensuality.

And yet, in a MICROSECOND, that smile
can transform into a smile that is soaking
with desperation and approval-seeking.

The best kind of smile FLOWS from being in the
right STATE of mind to begin with, a combination
of being upbeat, dominant, and a touch sensual.

That state of mind then MANIFESTS itself in the
perfect facial expressions and the perfect
inflections in your voice that communicate
indirectly to a woman that you indeed are
THE MAN.

However, sometimes, it is very difficult for
a guy to FEEL that perfect state of mind,
so one TIP to help GET into that state of
mind is to not only CHANGE YOUR PHYSIOLOGY
and actually try to create the right
facial expressions, but to also practice
your VOICE TONALITIES as well, saying
even the most basic things but saying
them with your voice now INFUSING
confidence, upbeatness, and sensuality
into your words.

This is why, for example, a guy CAN say
something as simple as:

"How are you?"

And he can PACK those words with so much
of the right EMOTIONS that a woman can
get wet just from his delivery.

And before you think I am joking around,
try this out.

Try SLOWING down the delivery of your words.
Try adding some BREATH into the sound.

Think of how the PHYSICAL sensations are
often implied when a person speaks about
a certain FOOD they love, such as heavenly
hash ice cream, or sinfully rich chocolate,
etc, etc.

You can often HEAR the passion in their
voice.

This is often referred to as accessing
the KINESTHETIC state of mind, meaning
the FEELING state of mind.

The KINESETHETIC state is often accompanied
by SLOWER vocal delivery.

Now, all this so far has been the DEEP level.

There is a SIMPLER yet equally important level
to this whole question on whether to smile or not
when approaching women and chatting them up
for a pick up.

And this level boils down to one simple question:
ARE YOU APPROACHING HER IN A PARTY ENVIRONMENT
OR IN AN ENVIRONMENT THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO
WITH PARTYING?

So, if you are approaching a woman at a dance
club, or even a lounge, or at a party, the
whole POINT of being there in the first place
is to have a great time!

If a guy is in such a place and NOT HAVING
a great time, then why is he there?

Is he there ONLY to try to meet women but he
is really NOT enjoying the environment?

If so, that is NOT cool, because it's putting
TOO MUCH EMPHASIS and TOO MUCH PRESSURE on
the whole topic of picking up women.

Now, this might seem ironic, since the truth is,
if it were NOT for the social angle to these
party environments, no one would go, but it has
to be done in a way where meeting the opposite
sex is just a BYPRODUCT of having a great time
at the venue/party location.

Also, a guy forcing himself to do something that
is mostly not fun means he is not in a great state
of mind, and that in itself will weaken the success
of any approach he makes on women in the environment
where he is not having a good time.

So, in a PARTY venue, smiling makes a LOT of sense.
And it's the PARTY atmosphere that really is the
defining trait here, because for example, a guy
can be out on Saturday night NOT in the actual
club or lounge, but in the general vicinity of
the fun/club/party/entertainment district area
of town, and now ALL THESE ACTUAL locations
have become party atmospheres, and a guy
can go approach a group of women walking along
the sidewalk as IF he were IN the club and
just start with a smile right away.

On the OTHER hand, if it is Monday in the
business part of town smack in middle of
the day, and a guy sees a gorgeous woman
walking beside him, starting off with a
big party smile is NOT a good idea at ALL.

It seems OUT OF PLACE.

It also seems as if the guy is ASSUMING
he is already SOMEWHERE with her when
he is not, and this is not interpreted
as CONFIDENCE by a woman because it
becomes more an issue of SAFTEY
and CREEPINESS.

Now, as you know, I DO advise men to
NOT worry about coming across as
PSYCHO, and to MAKE the approaches
on total strangers.  I ALSO suggest
that a very SIMPLE way to not come
across as psycho is to NOT start
with this big smile that comes right
out of nowhere if the environment    
is NOT a party atmosphere, i.e.
like meeting on the sidewalk in
middle of a Monday.

This is ESPECIALLY true if a woman is
really attractive, because she has
probably seen quite a bit of strange
smiles, normal smiles, ogling eyes
on her, etc, etc.

So you want to AVOID flipping her
PROTECTION SWITCH, which is basically
her turning all her attention OFF
from any guy who just comes out of
the blue and comes up to her with
this big smile or perhaps even
ANY smile.

By NOT STARTING with a smile, you
help PREVENT telegraphing to her that
you have already fast-forwarded in
your mind to the part where you both
take your clothes off before she
even knew you EXISTED.

You don't want her thinking that, as most
women are not as immediately ready to jump
into the physical act as most men are.

By NOT smiling right away, or at least not
giving that party smile right away, you
are showing that you RESPECT THE PROCESS
of actually FIRST GETTING TO KNOW HER.

RESPECT THE PROCESS.
It is what separates the boys from the men.

Get the conversation rolling first, with
something that MAKES SENSE for that
environment, whether it is looking for
directions or something else.

And then, use WHATEVER SHE SAYS BACK TO YOU
as your FUEL for THEN getting into flirty
mode, i.e. you can playfully tease her
on the directions she gave you, or you
can playfully tease her on something else.

You do not even have to playfully tease at all.
You can find something that is happening
in the immediate environment, such as
a particularly unique cafe or live music
venue or museum or anything else that is
compelling, and you can ask for directions
to it, and even if she doesn't know, it
gives you a chance to talk about it and
this now becomes a conversation topic
that is likely to get her asking you
about it as well.

You don't need to talk to a woman for
an hour to get her number. If you are
chatting her up for 10 minutes, that
can be a very strong conversation
leading to a number that is very real
and to a very real date where she is
looking forward to meeting you again.

Now, as you can see, the things I teach
and discuss are not just things I came
up with that sounded nice.  They come
from REAL TESTING in the REAL WORLD.

THAT is how I learned the things that
I teach. 

That is also why men come from all over
the world to learn from me directly in
my Real World Bootcamps where all learning
happens in real time on tons of women
in tons of venues.

This is not theory or hypothesis.
It's the REAL THING.

For Bootcamp, go here:

http://getagreatgirl.com/bootcamp-sign-up.html

I also have two MAJOR different programs that
are VITAL to your success with women.

The first program, called ATTRACTION MASTERY,
is all about mastering the skills of attraction
to get experience with LOTS of women.
It's at:

http://getagreatgirl.com/Mastery.html

You can even check out new samples of this
program on that page.

The second program, called WARRIOR WITHIN,
is all about mastering the deepest levels
of INNER GAME, which is absolutely ESSENTIAL
if you want to meet, attract, and KEEP
a fantastic girlfriend.

It's at:

http://getagreatgirl.com/warrior.html

You can also check out what guys who actually
attended the live recording of this program
had to say about this program, by going to
the page above.

I've spent over ten YEARS teaching programs
that CLEAR UP all the confusion and that
ANSWER all the questions you have about
attracting women, and most of all, that give
men the SKILLS for attracting women of
the highest quality.

And I don't just talk the talk, I continue
to teach these skills LIVE to men from
all over the world, and I continue to
prove these concepts in the real world.

To find out about ALL my programs for
skyrocketing your success with women,
go here:

http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php

Till next time,

Michael Marks

How To Deal With Abusive Women

In my work over the years, and in my own
experiences with women, I've seen a certain
mistake that happens so often it's almost
as if every guy has to go through this
at least a few times in his life before
he gets the lesson INGRAINED into his soul.

So here's the lesson, and hopefully you
can save yourself years of pain and
learning it all the hard way:

If YOU are doing the right things in general
with women, that is to say that you're not
being a jerk, you're not giving into insecurity,
you're doing your part to keep things exciting,
etc., then unless you have KIDS with a woman,
there is simply NO REASON to stick with her
if she is being ABUSIVE or DISRESPECTFUL
in any way.

(And even if you do have kids with a woman,
it doesn't mean you should stay with an
abusive woman for the rest of your life,
as it's not even good for kids to see
their parents hating each other.)

And yet, most guys (and for women who are
in similar situations with abusive men)
including myself for many years, would NOT
be able to see things for what they were.

So, for example, I would somehow think that
there must be something I could DO to change
a woman, as if there was something that was
my responsibility to make it work, as if
I was being "lazy" if I didn't try one
trillion tactics to try to make it "work"
with a certain woman.

OR, what was even worse, I would start to think
that all women were so crazy, that I was still
kind of "lucky" to even be with a certain woman
who was at least "not as bad" as all the "OTHER"
crazy women out there.

ALL THIS KIND OF THINKING IS WRONG.

It's wrong because first of all, NO WOMAN is
worth taking ABUSE from.

No matter how needy you think or feel you are,
the truth is that you are STRONGER than you
realize, and you CAN be able to survive
WITHOUT some woman, especially one who
is driving you insane.

The FEAR of being alone is so powerful, that
it distorts our thinking, it makes us think
that the WRONG woman is somehow still the
RIGHT woman.

Also, the IDEA of having to find ANOTHER woman
is, if you don't know how easy it is to meet
women, it can seem VERY SCARY and also it can
seem like SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much work to have to
find ANOTHER woman.

So what happens is that so many men, and I used to be one of these men, end up STAYING with the
wrong woman.  If you do this, she will just RIP APART your self-esteem to the point that you really DO think you are lucky to be with her, even if she IS an abusive woman.

Meanwhile, if most men knew how EASY it can be
to meet other women, and also how much STRONGER
most men are inside than they realize, men would
NOT TAKE ONE OUNCE OF CRAP FROM ANY WOMAN.

(And similarly, good women would not take
crap from any abusive man.)

Here's the other thing: If a woman is making your
life miserable, at the very LEAST you should
realize that meeting THOSE kind of women is
no big deal, so why on Earth be so dedicated
to ONE particular woman who is not even
treating you well?

Another important point: Don't even get dramatic
about this whole thing.  I used to be very
dramatic about it, I would go on for hours
and days and weeks thinking about how on
Earth can some women be so downright cruel,
but then I realized there is a simple solution
that works INSTANTLY.

It's called LEAVING the wrong woman and
moving on IMMEDIATELY.

You can decide to make your own life miserable
as I used to do, by getting all dramatic about
things.  OR, you can STOP the negativity from
any abusive woman by just LEAVING and meeting
OTHER women immediately.

And of course, the SOONER you leave the
wrong situation, the SOONER you leave the
wrong woman, the LESS bitter you will be.

So I suggest that you don't spend years or
weeks or months trying to FIGURE OUT how
to "conquer" some abusive woman's mind,
and that you don't try to WIN some kind
of contest with the wrong woman by trying
to make her SEE what a huge mistake she
is making by not treating you right.

Trust me, though, I understand just how much
we as men really WANT to make a woman
REALIZE what a horrifying mistake she
made. 

But the irony is that the BEST way to
really make a woman learn any lesson
is when she sees that you really HAVE
moved on, and that you are NOT even
bitter and that you are NOT wasting
even one BIT of energy on her.

In other words, the quicker you get on with
ENJOYING your life, and with meeting other
women for real and not for the sake of
getting revenge, is ironically the BEST
way to "teach a woman a lesson".

If you want to teach those women a lesson,
then DON'T waste energy on trying to teach
those women a lesson.

I know, it sounds the opposite of what makes
sense, but it is the TRUTH.

Even though there ARE tactics that can have an
impact on making the wrong women behave
BETTER, you will not be changing these women
on their CORE level.

Just because you CAN attract a certain woman
does not mean you SHOULD.  And what I mean
by this, is you should only try to attract women
who also have the right CHARACTER, because
otherwise it's just a matter of time till the
rotten character of an abusive woman rears it's ugly
head again, and you will forever be burdened
with trying to keep her in check with attraction
tactics.

Instead, focus your energies on meeting MORE
women and on learning how to detect the right
women, so that your attraction efforts truly
reach the ZENITH of their purpose, which is
to make an already great woman actually ATTRACTED
to you rather than just being with you for logical
reasons.

In other words, she's already a good girl, or rather
a GREAT girl.  But you don't want her to only be
with you because of that, you want her to be with
you because she is also ATTRACTED like crazy
to you.  THAT'S the whole point of get a great girl,
it's to truly ATTRACT the great girls.  

The only way to WIN against an ABUSIVE woman
is for you to get OVER her, and the only way to do
that is to focus all your energies on YOURSELF and
on finding ANOTHER woman, A GREAT woman, and
NOT on spending even ONE DROP of your energy on
the abusive woman, not even energy on "how to teach
her a lesson".

The very ACT of trying to teach her a lesson
actually tells your OWN MIND that you feel
she is of HIGH VALUE and that she must be
so hot and so desirable. 

And of course, this will just get you even
DEEPER into wanting her even MORE. 

So again, this will just make HER win.

The real way to WIN is to NOT spend
even ONE DROP of energy on teaching
her anything. 

Taking this path, by the way, also
sends the right message to your OWN
mind, which is the message that you
DON'T NEED HER, that you are worth
MORE than her, that you are so
important that it's not worth your
precious TIME to waste any energy
at all of any sort on her.   

Women can always SENSE when they have the
power or when you have the power, and if
a woman is still wasting your time and
energy with your need to prove anything
to her, it shows her and makes her feel
that SHE is super important, otherwise
why on Earth would you feel the need
to prove anything to her?

Also, for your own peace of mind, your own
happiness, and for your own SUCCESS with
a TRILLION OTHER WOMEN who are of HIGHER
QUALITY, taking the path of NOT wasting
your energy on proving anything to the
abusive women is the way to go.

You "prove" your worth by NOT wasting
time on her (the abusive woman), and by
LEAVING her as fast as possible.

One last point:
There are a TRILLION ways to disrespect someone.
It can be through actually physically cheating.
But it can also be through infinite other ways,
and it DOESN'T matter what the specifics are,
if she is not behaving like a decent person
to you, then DON'T WASTE YOUR PRECIOUS LIFE
TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY

Don't try to become her THERAPIST and cure her
of her JERK behavior.
 
SHE IS A FEMALE JERK and it's not your job
to fix her.

Just MOVE ON right away.

Don't LIE to yourself either and tell yourself
that it's important to change her, the only
reason we tell this to ourselves is because
we WANT her to treat us right and we don't
want to go through the WORK of GETTING
A DIFFERENT WOMAN because we think it
either will be too hard or take too long, etc.

So this is where I come in:
I want to GIVE YOU OPTIONS when it comes to women.

I want to show you HOW to fish, rather than just
GIVE you a fish.

I want you to LEARN HOW to meet and attract
TONS of women, and how to DETECT women's
CHARACTERS and VALUES very quickly so you
can spare yourself the agony of being with
the WRONG women and you can enjoy the
pleasure of being with a great woman who
RESPECTS YOU to the ultimate degree.

For my most ADVANCED program on these topics
and on attracting a QUALITY woman go HERE:

http://getagreatgirl.com/warrior.html

To check out ALL my programs for meeting
and attracting women so that you have
INFINITE OPTIONS and you NEVER give into
the feelings of scarcity that can drive
you into the ABYSS of desperation with
women, go HERE immediately:

http://www.getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php

Get the POWER to be able to go out and
approach and attract women ANYTIME,
ANYWHERE.

Check it all out at:

http://www.getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.php

You'll be glad you did.

Till next time,

Michael Marks