What Turns Women ON

If you can make a woman feel intense
PLEASURE, she will be yours.

Pleasure is the reason we are attracted
to ANYTHING.

Now, the human mind is pretty sophisticated,
including women's minds. We are not going
to be attracted to just anything.

This goes back to evolution, because by
feeling the emotion of attraction toward
things that would help us survive, it gave
us an advantage.  It motivated us.

And being repulsed by things that were
bad for us also helped us survive.  It
kept us away from the wrong things.

i.e. Bad spoiled food. So by developing
an AVERSION to spoiled food.  So those
who felt it tasted HORRIBLE were more
likely to survive and replicate.

We also evolved to be ATTRACTED to foods
that were GOOD for us. So, for example,
those who had genes that enabled them to
perceiving fruit as tasting "sweet", were
motivated to find it and eat it.  And so
they too were more likely to survive
and replicate.

Of course, it doesn't always work perfectly,
as candy bars also taste good to us, because
candy bars are relatively new in human history,
and our brains haven't evolved yet to "NOT
enjoy candy bars but still enjoy fruit".

But the fact is, our brains have evolved in a
way where now we are HARDWIRED to be
attracted to certain things.  To perceive
them as "sweet".  And to be repulsed
by other things, to perceive them as
"yucky".  And everything in between.

So, the KEY to attracting a WOMAN is to do
EVERYTHING in your POWER to come
across as BEING DESIRABLE, according
to the emotional part of her brain.
 
So you have to INTERACT with a woman by
behaving in a way that CONVEYS MASSIVE
VALUE to her.

Most guys TRY to do this but do it all wrong,
so let's get clear on what value REALLY
looks like, sounds like, and feels like.

Behavior is not just your ACTIONS.
It's not just your words.

It's not just your voice tonality.

It's not just your clothing.

It's not just your attitude.

It's not just your BODY LANGUAGE.

It's not just your sense of humor.

It's not just the way you REACT to her.

It's not just the people she sees you
hang out with or don't hang out with.

It's not just the way you feel about sex,
i.e. comfortable or not.

It's not just how you make her mind
race trying to figure you out, or
wondering or fantasizing what might
come next.

It's not just how slow or fast you are
to validate her or to withhold validating
her.

It's not just how you touch her and how
calm or confident you are about it.

It's not just how MUCH you can control
THE FRAME of the situation.

IT'S ALL THE ABOVE AND MUCH MORE.

Every single thing about you, and every
single thing about the situation you are in
with a woman, can be used to make her
feel you are MORE DESIRABLE, or
if done wrong, to make her feel that
you are LESS desirable.

And the more desirable you seem, the
MORE PLEASURE she feels from getting
closer to you.  

This is why I am so ADAMANT about not
just sticking to ONE thing to over-simplify
the process. This is not the McDonald's of
attraction.

To be THE BEST, you have to understand
how ALL the components of attraction play
a role and you have to USE these components.

If you want the McDonald's style pick up
and attraction advice, there are a billion
other guys out there. If you want the
Rolls Royce, this is the place.

EVERYTHING, in fact, that happens while
you are chatting to a woman to pick her up,
or even if you've known her a long time
and she is your girlfriend, EVERYTHING
that is happening in the situation can be used
to make you MORE ATTRACTIVE or LESS
ATTRACTIVE.

If a woman is acting 'hard to get', that's not a bad thing!
ONLY YOUR REACTION TO IT COUNTS.

If you react the way a guy who is DESIRABLE acts,
then you become MORE ATTRACTIVE.

I'm not saying you have to LOVE a
woman who is acting like a b****,
but the fact is, a GREAT woman has
to be CAREFUL about which guy she
goes for, so she can't be EASY.

Your REACTION to her 'hard to get'
behavior tells her ALL the important
things she needs to know about your
CHARACTER, and your reaction will
make ALL THE DIFFERENCE IN
THE WORLD to her attraction to you.

If you act the way a guy who is NOT
DESIRABLE acts, then you become
LESS ATTRACTIVE.

Here's an example: A woman says something
like, "We don't talk to guys at clubs, we just
get free drinks from them!", and your reaction
is, "Cool, maybe you can work for me then,
I'm looking for some hustlers that have
ambition. But first, let's see how good you
are and get me and my buddy some drinks."

So her "act of superiority" backfires, because
the way you framed it, it's just a way that she
can possibly EARN your interest, but she has
to PROVE her worth to you still, and in fact
you're still the one with greater value in the
situation. And yet it's all fun and playful too,
which ALSO feels good. So there's attraction
pleasure going on, and fun times as well.

All this makes her attraction more intense,
because emotions feed energy into each
other. Not bad, and all done in a few seconds.
And she set herself up for it. And she's
feeling way more pleasure with YOU than
she is with all those guys who were kissing up
and trying so hard and being so serious.

And, it's VERY POSSIBLE to NOT TEASE
A GIRL and STILL pick her up SUPER EASILY.

Teasing is just ONE EFFECTIVE method,
because it's a natural OUTGROWTH of
you KNOWING YOU ARE DESIRABLE.

Because you are feeling an abundance of
good vibes internally and feeling you are
so desirable, that energy shows and is
ATTRACTIVE. This makes you not
worried about women's reactions to you,
so you become PLAYFUL with women,
instead of being so serious and formal.

This is why a mean spirited tease doesn't work.
Because it's not a sign of value, it's a sign of
an angry guy or a socially retarded guy.
Anger is usually a sign of loss or fear
or insecurity as well. All signs of
LACK OF VALUE. So the hard-wiring
in her brain is REPULSED by it.

It's a fine line between feeling value, and feeling
arrogant to the point of being a prick - which is not
attractive. Practice on real women makes perfect,
as you get a better feel for it and your calibration
skills grow.

But in general, guys are trying SO HARD to
VALIDATE a woman that hasn't done anything
to deserve that, she simply LOOKS BEAUTIFUL.
And a woman senses that a guy that behaves that
way must be LOW VALUE. It's her EMOTIONS
that sense this, not her logic so much.

This is why NOT VALIDATING a woman
who is attractive is such a powerful thing.
It creates a TENSION, the same kind of
tension that YOU feel regarding the fact
that a woman who is beautiful is HARD
to get.

Believe me, if it was raining women
who were gorgeous on you everyday
and they just wanted to kiss up to you,
you would get bored. You actually
value women more because they are
hard to get, because they don't try to
validate you. Of course, there is a limit
to this, as too much is too much, there
has to a PAYOFF, where she DOES show
some interest, where you DO get the girl,
or she is JUST a tease.

Similarly, when you tease a girl, literally or
figuratively, it's not to tease her permanently,
it's to create the tension in her so now she
WANTS to be validated by you. That way,
your interest in her feels good for her.

THAT'S what leads to her interest and sexual
desire, etc. Similar to what makes YOU want
to be with her.

So that's why when you don't give a woman
who is attractive what she wants so fast, it's
cool. The idea though is to do it matter of factly,
not MEANLY. Or do it in a humorous way.

So, if she asks you for the time and you
are at the bus stop, you say how much do you
want to give me for it, etc. If she's at the
gym and she's all hot after a workout and
buying herself a water bottle, you make fun
of her for pouring water on herself to make it
look like she's trying to workout. And it's
not done with "vengeance", it's done out of
VALUE, YOUR VALUE, and PLAYFULNESS.

When you don't validate a girl easily,
it's FUN for her, her hard-wiring feels
there's something of VALUE here,
i.e. YOU. And she wants to get it.
Again, a fine line between doing this
too much and doing it too little.

And the thing is, I don't even think about
it anymore. It's just a form of communication,
I'm not even trying to always pick up a girl,
it's just the way I feel.

So for example, I was at the bank, and this
hottie teller who's not even my teller but far
away, is being consulted by my teller for
something. So the hottie makes a mistake
and the hottie tells me all the way from where
she is that she made a mistake, and she says
she's so dizzy, hearing voices in her head.

So I tell her, loud enough so that everyone
can hear, "must be those recreational drugs
you keep on using" and I say it with a serious
face, but she KINDA KNOWS I'm joking
because the tonality is so matter of fact
that for sure I'm NOT being serious.
Her jaw drops, THEN she laughs, and she
says, "Don't say that! These people
don't know, they think you're serious!"
But as she says it, you can tell she's
ENJOYING it.

So I go "Who's joking?" AGAIN
in a deadpan serious way. Which
is actually funnier, because it's
more extreme of an accusation
which makes the whole thing
NOT true. She gives that big
smile, and she "GETS IT".

I'm just like this all the time, it
translates into everything I do,
including when I decide to dabble
for fun on the net and have some
fun with women on dating sites.
I put up a profile, usually without
even putting a picture, and I get
"hot listed" usually by women who
are the most attractive on the site.
Because the profile is just me being
this same way, from my profile name
to my description to whatever I write.

Instead of SAYING "I am great and sexy
and fun" they FEEL it from reading it.
i.e. I make jokes about how I have an
eternal erection and that it's really tough
and that every girl thinks I like her, even
if I don't, and that I have to tell her
"It's not you, it's ME". Stuff like that.

THEY GET IT.
Because they FEEL the vibe of value,
of non-neediness, of sexuality, of playfulness,
the message behind the message.
They are LAUGHING AND FEELING
it, instead of reading "I am great".

And, in a way, even with guys I know, i.e.
at the gym, I'm just a playful, confident, fun
dude. No, not because I'm trying to pick them
up, although we actually bust on each other
about that stuff too,- i.e. "You hardly spot me
anymore! You don't like my spots? I saw you
spotting a few other guys- you're a
SPOT-WHORE!" because we are SECURE
in our masculinity, unlike most guys.

This is the VIBE.
And women pick up on it when they
are around us, it's ATTRACTIVE
to women, even though we really
aren't even TRYING.

It works because we are secure, and because
we are having FUN. We are not looking
for approval, but we are not jerks, in
fact we actually have a certain amount
of trust going on. Like at the gym,
we bust on each other all the time.

So the same vibes of security, feeling
trust and confidence that the other person
will "GET it", and the playfulness is there,
all this is the same stuff that works on
women, except you also add the PHYSICAL
ESCALATION with women and the sexual
vibes state that you need to be in, and you
add just the right amount of DOMINANCE
at the right time - at the beginning, and when
transitioning things to the next level of
escalation.

And that's just a BEGINNING of an
interaction. But the beginning COUNTS,
because you are ESTABLISHING
THE FRAME. So if I open a set of girls
ANYWHERE, coffee shop, club, store,
anywhere, the very FIRST words are
ALSO said with the tonality that makes
the frame CLEAR: "This is my world,
it's a great world, I'm laid back, and
I'm inviting you in by the mere fact I'm
talking to you, without making it a formal
ass-kissing invitation."

Sometimes, the girls seem a bit confused
at that VERY FIRST second, because this
doesn't happen to them everyday, so they
aren't sure what's going on. I don't abandon
ship. I STAY ON COURSE, and just KEEP
ON GOING with it, and they "get on board"
fast.

What a lot of guys do is they try to
act cool with a tease, but have nothing
to follow it up with. Because they are
too focused on the ACT of teasing, and
not focused on the PRINCIPLE of
feeling secure and SUPERIOR SELF
VALUE. The mere act of WORRYING
about what she thinks so much so that
you can come up with the perfect thing t
o say next is something she CAN DETECT
because she has seen the various forms of
insecurity a million times in other guys.

And she detects that you are trying so hard
for her, TOO HARD, too fast before even
KNOWING HER AT ALL, before she has
done anything to DESERVE that effort.
So THAT implies to her subconscious
that you are NOT WORTH MUCH.

So her brain feels NO PLEASURE.

At EVERY point in an interaction with
a woman from meeting her the first time
all the way to sex and beyond and even
into a serious relationship, there is the way
a guy with VALUE would act and the way
a guy without value would act.

So if you are at a club and have gone up
to a girl or group of girls and teased them
and then you are chatting with the girl
you like most, and you tell her to come
sit down with you where it's quieter,
and she resists, how do you react?

Does it AFFECT your sense of self-worth?
Or are you COMPLETELY COOL and still
feeling the sexual vibes inside of you and
feeling good and you chat her up some more
and then GO FOR IT AGAIN? That would
be a decent strategy. Or, another strategy
that would be cool would be to just be
more dominant in your OWN FRAME
about the idea of her going with you.

Because if YOU think it's a big deal, that
means that YOU FEEL SHE HAS SUPERIOR
VALUE, so when she resists going, you think
she is actually doing the RIGHT THING for
herself, since you don't feel you have the value!
So you actually feel GUILTY about trying to
get her to come sit down with you!

But if you DID FEEL YOU HAD THE VALUE,
then you would feel it's in HER interest to come
with you! Because SHE would be having a great
time. So then instead of feeling GUILTY, you
would be smiling and maybe wink at her, and
take her hand while looking in her EYES and
say "don't deprive yourself!"

GET IT?

And when you DO take her hand, don't take
it like a GIRL. Take it like a MAN.
I used to be scared I might crush a girl's
hand because I work out so much, but then
I realized that the worst thing that ever happens
if I DO hold her too firmly is the girl thinks
I'm JOKING and she tries to SQUEEZE
BACK as hard as she can and laughs.
So it's all good, as they say, since it only
adds to the FUN vibes.

Superiority. Value. Fun. Sexuality.
DOMINANCE.

These are actually ALL FORMS OF
PLEASURE for a woman when you
convey them.

And that is what you want to give a woman.

Another important note on pleasure:

SEX is obviously one of the HIGHEST forms
of pleasure. So, do you realize how
HORRIFYINGLY TERRIBLE OF A MISTAKE
IT IS TO COME ACROSS AS TOO "NICE"
by avoiding any sexual undertones to your
interaction? Or by COMING ACROSS
as "too NICE for HARDCORE sex"?

A woman ALREADY has to deal with cultural
brainwashing of feeling like a slut if she is
too "easy", so if you are going to ALSO
have "issues" with sex, by not being in
a sexual state yourself, or by avoiding
any sexual content to your conversation,
she will feel that things are going to be
VERY RESTRICTED AND NOT FUN
WITH YOU IN THE BEDROOM.

And of course, when you DO get to
to the bedroom part, you have to
realize that all that "not wanting to
be a slut" fear is something that
goes out the window - if you have
issues in the bedroom, if you feel
bad about sex, how the heck is
SHE going to feel good about it???

So you see, at EVERY stage of the interaction,
it's ALWAYS about increasing the PLEASURE,
it's about making her feel greater and more
INTENSE emotions- this is why creating
that CONNECTION with her is also important,
because it makes the experience of being with
you MORE INTIMATE, more meaningful.

But don't think for one SECOND it's
connection for connection's sake. It's
about how that can make the whole experience
even more of a RUSH. Sex with a girl you
are not only ATTRACTED to, but who you
also feel CONNECTED TO, feels WAY
MORE INTENSE.

It's the same for a girl when it comes to how
SHE feels.

One last point on pleasure for now- in general,
we want MORE AND MORE of it, not less
and less. So, once things are heating up with
a woman, whether it's your opening up of the
conversation, the teases, the contact, don't
RUIN it by going backwards into INFERIOR
GUY MODE, i.e. "playing it emotionally
safe for yourself"

This is what happens with so many guys,
they are finally making progress and getting
somewhere, they are getting how all this works,
the girl is getting attracted, but then the guy
starts to get TOO DEPENDENT ON THE
OUTCOME and he starts to get needy for
it, and he displays the characteristics of
inferiority instead of BEING THE MAN!

So, if she's laughing, she's sitting down
with you, you're holding her hand, kissing,
whatever it is, KEEP IT GOING to the
NEXT LEVEL as much as possible.

That doesn't mean to make out with her
non stop at the bar, and it doesn't mean
to KEEP ON TEASING her non-stop.
That's not what I mean at all. What I
mean is take things to the NEXT level
of the interaction. You kind of KNOW
in your gut when it's time to move on
from the opener, when it's time to
go into rapport, when it's time to
hold her hand, when it's time to
kiss her, when it's time to escalate
to sex. You have to MAKE it
happen, and not stay in the
"emotional zero-risk zone".

But like I said, what happens is that guys
have this guy idea in their minds that their
VALUE is at stake, so they don't want
to screw up. That's just more society
brainwashing though, because in fact
going for it is the way to get good.

But guys let the ego control them, they are
AFRAID of getting rejected by going for
the NEXT STAGE, be it leaving with her,
or kissing her, or whatever it is that comes
next. But the whole way you GOT to the
good situation in the first place was by
NOT following your fears, but rather
following what you DO WANT.

You CAN'T WIN by adopting the
"fear" strategy of "staying where
you are because you got somewhere
and you don't want to RUIN it".

The WORST THING that happens from
GOING for it is that maybe she resists.
THAT'S FINE. First of all, it's usually
only TEMPORARY, it just means she's
not ready to escalate right that SECOND.
In three minutes from that time, she may
very well be TOTALLY RECEPTIVE
to your escalation again.

And no matter what, you'll improve your
calibration and sense of timing for next time.

And the best thing that happens, is that you
get EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT and have the time
of your life. And the reality is that with
this technology that I am teaching, it's
actually FAR MORE LIKELY to get what you want,
than to get the opposite reaction.

This newsletter has touched on a TON of
CRUCIAL elements of attraction. And as you
can tell, ONE of the BIG ones is developing
the SKILL of a super-confident sense of HUMOR.

To do that, I seriously suggest you download my
program on how to develop confident humor now.

In this program, I interview a man who used
to be a virgin till 26, then became known
as one of the most daring, funny, and successful
guys with women on the PLANET. In fact, his
story has been told in a New York Times'
best selling book.

This program is at:

http://www.getagreatgirl.com/confident-humor.html

And as the weather warms up and hot women
are popping up everywhere out of hibernation,
this is a GREAT TIME to sign up for BOOTCAMP.
 
In bootcamp, you will learn it all LIVE on
women in tons of venues and locations. From how
to create MORE pleasure by being DIFFERENT,
by being unpredictable so her mind cannot
ADAPT and thus cannot get bored, to how
to dress in a way that accents sexuality
and superiority and fun and triggers those
awesome emotions in her. To how your
LIFESTYLE fits into all this to OPTIMIZE
your attractive power. To how all this plays
into SEX as well. And how to adapt for a
club environment and for quieter
environments, and much more.

You'll be IMMERSED in REAL WORLD pickup for
3 DAYS and 3 NIGHTS. I'll demonstrate it for
you again and again, so you can EXPERIENCE
and see the subtleties of EFFECTIVE humor,
dominance, bonding, physical escalation, and
much more. I'll coach you as you wing with me,
I'll give you EXACT SPECIFICS on what to do
IMMEDIATELY to improve everything in your game,
from your body language, to your frame of humor,
to your voice, to what you are doing to get
a girl to move from A to B. I'll also DELVE
into your inner game and find the obstacles
holding you back internally and help you
blast them away FOR GOOD.

And I'll take your sense of style to the next level
so that you start stirring women's emotions as
soon as they see you, even before you've said
a word.

It's all at:

http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html

And for my most advanced HOME STUDY program,
you DEFINITELY want to get my program
WARRIOR WITHIN, which will blow your mind
and take you to the NEXT LEVEL with women
and it will do it FASTER than any other
program out there, PERIOD.

It's at:

http://www.getagreatgirl.com/warrior.html

This program gives you the crucial knowledge
and makes it available at your FINGERTIPS, 24/7.

It will REVOLUTIONIZE the way you look at
attraction and the way you interact with women,
and you can come back to it again and again
whenever you have a question, for YEARS to come.

No matter how you look at it, this program
will seriously increase your results. If you
take it before the bootcamp, it will prepare
you so that you can push yourself even
FURTHER and gain even MORE skill.

If you take it after the bootcamp, it's an
EXCELLENT way to KEEP you on top of your game
as you continue to use the skills in the real
world and refer to the program for any questions
that may arise.

It's at:

http://www.getagreatgirl.com/warrior.html

Till next time,

Michael Marks

How To Use Your Identity To Attract Women

Behold, there is a way to trigger attraction
without sacrificing who YOU are.

It's called, get ready for it:

DROP THE "I'M SO COOL" ACT.

Don't kiss up.
But don't try to be so "cool" either.

Almost every “system” out there attempts to
remold you into a supposedly “alpha male”
stereotype that is often too simplistic to
PRACTICALLY apply in real life.

For example, you are told to “be alpha”.
Then you see this girl on the street you’d like to
chat up. So you think, “be alpha”.
Okay, now what?
What are you supposed to do?
Drag her by the hair to your cave?
Frown at her?
Just tell her you want her number?
And what if you have nothing at the moment
to tease her playfully on?
Are you suddenly up a creek without a paddle?

What if you didn’t have to worry about
what you said to open up the conversation
because YOU UNDERSTOOD things about
women and human beings, including yourself,
on such a high level, that you could EASILY
come up with a thousand things that felt
perfectly NATURAL to say that would work
just fine? And how would you feel if a huge
part of the reason this all worked was because
of the way YOU naturally are, the person behind
the words, instead of the learned technique?
And how would you feel if you knew you
had it all under control, in terms of how to
lead the situation from one stage to the next?

One of the critical components to making all
this work without having to be somebody else,
rests in learning to revel in and unleash your
IDENTITY, including the times that you
feel the desire to MASK it with everything
you’ve got.

I’m not a particularly huge fan of Woody Allen
movies, but there is one very interesting dynamic
to all his movies that has a lot of relevance to
attraction. His character doesn’t change, regardless
of the film, regardless of whether he’s with some
friend or talking to some gorgeous woman, he
doesn’t change. He may be neurotic as hell about
a lot of other things, (and he may do things otherwise
that are counter to attraction) but he doesn’t
mask his personality to any of the other characters.

That says in a very EFFECTIVE, EMOTIONALLY
STIMULATING WAY, that he has VALUE.
That he is desirable enough that he DOESN’T
HAVE TO HIDE HIS PERSONALITY,
EVEN IF IT HAS SOME FLAWS.

(Which isn’t to say that a guy shouldn’t work
on improving himself, and in fact this is
part of the whole point of being your best
self.)

There is coolness in this trait.
Ironically, a guy who keeps trying to “act cool”
comes across as far more of a dweeb than a guy
who at first glance may dress as a dweeb but
when he opens his mouth and he talks and interacts,
is clearly allowing his personality to shine through
without fear.

Now, of course, there is a difference between
being yourself based on IGNORANCE and
being yourself based on KNOWLEDGE.

In my programs, I work on providing you the
KNOWLEDGE and EXPERIENCE so that
you can apply it in a way that you can still be
YOURSELF.

I believe that every person has tons of cool things
about them. You can’t help it, being a human being
is a pretty cool thing because we are constantly learning
things even if we aren’t trying. Now, some things
are more practical than others, but if you’ve been
on the planet for a bit, even for only 18 years, that’s
18 years of soaking in experiences, like school,
bullies, friends, disappointment, people who are
creepy, heartbreak, joy, helping others, etc, etc.
All stuff which makes you grow character.

And of course if you’ve been around longer,
that’s more experience to enhance your personality.

One of the elements I work on with clients is bringing
out the infinite power of their buried identities.

It is CRUCIAL FOR ATTRACTION to unleash
the identity that is HIDING behind the MASK.

Ever notice one of the elements that is common to
just about every truly great movie character?

The character’s FLAWS are not hidden.
They make his or her strengths seem more special.
More real. More admirable.

In the original movie, Rocky isn’t a rocket scientist,
and he made quite a few mistakes in his life.
But when he got the chance to make something
out of his life, and to fill up the gaps in his life,
damn he put his heart and soul into it, and was
determined to “go the distance".

His “going the distance” is more attractive
because of his other flaws.

No one is perfect, no one.
And deep down, we all know this.
So guys who try too hard to be perfect are
CLEARLY covering something up.

And THAT is uncool.

But guys get so caught up on wanting to make
a great impression, that their impression is
so sterilized, so anti-septic, so devoid of
“potentially damaging” content, that there is
NOTHING left. No “juice” left to the vibe.

It’s important to give people the chance
to see your flaws. Give them a chance
to REJECT you. Don’t go out of you way
to screw yourself up, but a flaw can often
be your best friend if it came out naturally.

More importantly, if you’re “in” and accepted
with your flaw, you will feel so much more
connected to the woman you are with. As
opposed to hiding it and living that kind
of attitude of fear.

This is not just about HOW to get women.
It’s about HOW to get the RIGHT women.

For this is the only way to truly give a chance
for REAL acceptance.

Of course, you need to be your BEST,
but that does not mean trying to come
across as perfect or fake or hiding
things about yourself.

And think about it:
If you give a woman a chance to reject you,
let’s say, by allowing your crazy sense of
humor to come through, or your personal
ideas about something else intriguing,
you are actually saying that you have enough
self worth to be prepared to accept someone’s
else’s rejection of you. And THAT actually
effectively, EMOTIONALLY, INDIRECTLY,
says that you DO have value.

This is very powerful stuff, and has implications
on many levels of communication.

Almost every song or movie in many ways one
can say has been done before, but what HASN’T
been done before, the part that actually IMPACTS
people, is the part where the artist REVEALS
VULNERABILITIES and yet is NOT AFRAID
TO REVEAL THEM, (thus a “proof” of their
OVERALL value that they can absorb the
impact of this flaw) and the WAY those
vulnerabilities are presented.

Again, this actually attests to being SECURE AND
HAVING VALUE. But it has to be done in a
non-apologetic way.

This is a very deep topic, but I hope I have
given some insight into it here.

Only if you have enough self-security in your
identity can you even go to the point of allowing
yourself to be embarrassed.

The other day I was having a conversation with
someone who told me about a quote from
Quentin Tarantino. Tarantino said something like,
“If you haven’t written something that embarrasses
you in your writing, then you haven’t done your job”.

EVERYONE TRIES TO ACT SO COOL, THAT WE ALL
KNOW THIS 'COOL' STUFF IS AN ACT, AND IT'S
A SIGN OF INSECURITY.

So, to a woman, if you are willing to put yourself
out there, it says EMOTIONALLY, INDIRECTLY, in
a powerful way, that you believe you have worth.

And the thing is, it’s because you are NOT saying
anything about your worth, in fact you are
SO COMFORTABLE AND RELAXED you don’t mind to
“screw up” or possibly reveal that you are
“not so perfect” and THAT actually makes you
come across as the REAL DEAL.

The truly superior deal.
Unlike every guy who tries to sell themselves as “special”.

And you can’t fake “being real”.
You can’t fake it any more than you can fake a great
movie, a great song, a great work of art.

When it’s really great, everyone feels it,
and when it’s imitation stuff, everyone
feels it as well.

Often, in bootcamps, I will do some pretty spontaneous
things, that I’m NOT SURE WILL “WORK”.  I will do
these things because I’m really not trying to be somebody
else. I'm being honest to my  thoughts and feelings, and
sometimes that might involve doing things like singing
not-so-professionally, etc.

One of the keys to this is to make sure that you
are not in the wrong state of mind, otherwise
all the honest stuff in the world will just reveal
that you honestly are not any fun to be around. 

This is one of the powerful benefits to your
training that you get from taking BOOTCAMP
with me, because you get to EXPERIENCE
it all LIVE.  I ensure that you actually LIVE
these words and don't just read them.

Once you EXPERIENCE results, it's easy
to DUPLICATE your results again, because
your mind now has a powerful MEMORY
of success rooted deeply inside of it,
making it easy to empower yourself
again and again in the future.

Plus, you remember the exact DETAILS
subconsciously, the exact subtle things
that helped you succeed, and you
instinctively APPLY them without
even thinking the next time you need
to when you see a woman you'd like
to approach.

On the topic of pushing your own comfort zone
and being comfortable conveying your identity,
there was once a movie with Cameron Diaz,
where her character is being set up to look like
a fool through singing karaoke.

The movie is called “My Best Friend’s Wedding”.

Yeah, yeah, I know it’s a 'chick flick'.
I enjoyed it.
(Hint, hint, do I try to pretend I only watch
RAMBO, even with women? Am I trying to be
ultra-COOL???)

Anyway, the thing is, Julia Robert’s character
wants to make Diaz’s character look bad.
But when Cameron’s character gets up there
on stage, even though she is not a great singer,
she TOTALLY GOES FOR IT, she gives it
her best and ENJOYS IT, she isn’t afraid of
screwing it all up. She is a real sport about her
own flaws and doesn’t hide from them.

Very cool, whether you are a guy or gal.

In fact, I’ve learned a TON about how girls act
comfortable, and realized how much GUYS can learn
from this. I’ve seen girls do all kinds of silly
things, from singing badly to dancing badly
and it was clear that they couldn’t sing better
and that they couldn’t dance better, and yet
they did it all anyway on purpose to just
be comfortable and relaxed and be themselves
and also they were “putting themselves out
there” being a bit vulnerable. It says a lot
of subtle things, good things.

And it’s actually quite an attractive trait
when done right.

This goes hand in hand with not being focused
on rejection, because you are actually GIVING
PEOPLE THE CHANCE TO REJECT THE REAL YOU.

If you give a woman a “chance to reject you”,
(I’m NOT saying to TRY TO SCREW THINGS UP)
you are REALLY actually stating that rejection
isn’t a big deal.

And THAT says value, and it also is pretty
cool in the sense that you’re not making such a
big deal about HER.

Because if you WERE making her the entire
focus of your life, you wouldn’t allow the
chance for rejection, would you?

Cool guys allow themselves to get rejected.
The irony is, they rarely see things as them
being rejected, which in itself causes women
to do a double take, and actually DESIRE the guy.

Are you comfortable with your own identity?
If YOU are comfortable with it, it stirs a reframe
even on things that supposedly AREN’T cool.

Think that Star Wars is a turn off to women?
(Never mind the "prequels", although the
last prequel had some cool moments).

It's only a turn-off if you go around trying
to IMPRESS women with it, or EXPECTING
women to be into it as if YOU would be
interested in soap operas. (And I have known
several women who just happen to be
STRIKINGLY gorgeous and who happen
to dig Star Wars quite a bit.)

In fact, if you are a cool guy (which means secure in
your identity) and a woman knows you are into
something like Star Wars, you’d be surprised at how
much she might even get into it all on her own.

A powerful identity strikes a REFRAME on any
supposed negative aspect of one’s self.
It is part of the larger picture of charisma.

If you want to learn how to PUSH your own
COMFORT ZONE so that you can truly be your
most comfortable self even in the presence
of the most beautiful feminine creatures
on the planet, I have a program that will
help you do exactly that.

In this program, I interview a man who used
to be so anxious around women that he literally
was a virgin until 26 and thought he would never
become good with women EVER. He then learned
to open up his personality to women, which
included his off-the-wall sense of humor,
to the point he became so good with women he
was featured in a New York Times best-selling
book on the subject of being good with women.

Sometimes, it's important to reach for the
stars in order to reach for the moon. This
man REALLY pushes the comfort zone, far BEYOND
what you will EVER have to do, and this is
why listening to my interview with him will
ENSURE that you at LEAST learn to push your
own comfort zone to the level that you NEED
to do in order to succeed with women.

This is a very powerful program on becoming
SUPER COMFORTABLE with your identity, and on
increasing your confidence, especially on
improving your confident sense of HUMOR with
women, which is IMMENSELY helpful at ALL stages
of interacting with a woman, from 'breaking the ice'
with her when you approach her, all the way to
making her enjoy being with you in a relationship.

This important program is at:

http://getagreatgirl.com/confident-humor.html

I want to also remind you about my LIVE
bootcamp training program. Be efficient
in how you learn about dating! Attending
a bootcamp allows me to make specific
calibrations to your individual character
which makes a HUGE difference.

These one-on-one coached 'individualized tweaks' to
both your inner confidence and your 'outer game'
allow you to make the kind of SERIOUS progress
with women that you might very well men NEVER
make otherwise.

Learning this all on your own is often too time
consuming and difficult. Having me deliver
exactly what YOU need as opposed to what
anyone ELSE needs, will ensure that you
obtain full, fast, and lasting success in
dating and relationships.

My bootcamp program is at:

http://www.getagreatgirl.com/realworld.html

Till next time,

Michael Marks